So, Sunday I got a manicure. Oh, yeah. Sunday. Got a manicure. Dope. Should definetely do that more often. Lookit, if youāre watching on YouTube, look at how much my fucking nails are popping right now.
Got a manicure, uh, and the time of the- the end came to the manicure, she finished up, she buffed my nails, made them nice and shiny, you can see, I can see my fucking reflection in these goddamn things, super shiny nails. And so she finishes up and Iām like yo, why donāt you just paint, just paint my pinkie black. Cause, I donāt know, I donāt know, Sam was like āyeah, Carson Daley(?) used to do thatā and Iām like thatās kinda cool, so paint it black, I donāt know, why not, fucking around. Who cares? Who the fuck cares? So I did it, thought it would look cool, my pinkie nail is black right now and Iām like ah, I look like a rock star, cool.
The amount of dudes that, itās funny ācause you can always tell who is not, like, totally, I donāt wanna say comfortable with their masculinity, but that might be it, I donāt know. The countless dudes that Iāve, that I know have seen it and been like ādude, uhhhhhh, duuude, uhhhh what the fuck is that, my dude? What is that? Get away from me.ā [Laughs] Seriously like itās to funny, people, itās a painted nail, what the fuck? Dudes flip out about this shit. Like I walk out, I was drinking a water bottle and one of my buddies goes āuhhh, duuude! I donāt know if you know this, but, um, your nail is purple.ā
Iām like dude, uh, okay first of all itās black, second of all yes Iām very much aware, I didnāt just fucking trip into a jar of nail polish. Like, why would I not know that, did someone do it being my back, like secretly? Iām like looking this way and one of my friends as a prank just pulls out his nail polish and fucking paints my pinkie nail black. All of a sudden. [Laughs] Should I have looked at my hand and been like āoh shit, it is! How did that happen? What the fuck?ā
No, I know itās painted black, Iām very much, I did it myself, because why the fuck not? But itās like, itās just funny, dudes are just so like, I donāt know, theyāre always like āgirls, girls do that, girls do it.ā So what, so yeah they do. Maybe some guys do it too, fuck it. Yeah itās a little abnormal, you donāt see it all the time, but what the fuckās the issue?
Are you scared? Are you scared that maybe youāll want to paint your nails when you see it? Is that what it is? āDude, get that thing away from me man, get away from me! Get it away from me! Thatās gay! Huah! Get it away, dude, you get that fucking hand away from me, I donāt fuck with that. Okay? You know what, no. Get it away, maybe Iām gonna want to paint one of my nails if that thing gets too close.ā
I think itās cool, man. Just one painted nail. Who knows, maybe Iāll do my other ones pink, fuck it, freak them out even more. āAhh, dude, whatās on your nails, looks like cotton candy, ahh! Thatās on a guy, you canāt do that, youāre a guy! You gotta be fucking, you gotta be buying football fabric. And, and punching other dudes in the face, and watching guys punching other dudes in the face. You canāt watch, you canāt do that with painted nails. Gross.ā
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