PERVERSION

park eunha. eighteen. ordinarily ordinary. (jj 301). you will not burn.

[yfxeunha]

WHITE TEETH TEENS

[xjimmiexyf-deactivated20160511]

jimin has collided with a different kind of territory, so different he could feel it. never in his life did he think that he’d come across– and he would definitely call it this, much to the dismay of some of his peers that are into the whole scene– recreational drugs. at least this encounter involves someone that’s young and isn’t likely to beat him up. maybe they were already bought, he doesn’t really know. and jimin won’t ask anyway because of course, it’s not really his business.

he nodded as he rested the bag on the palm of her hand. “you’re welcome.” with that, he finally found a peace of mind as he rested his back against the wall once again. he let out a heavy sigh of relief; the tension turning into the smoke he saw reaching the ceiling. no conflict, just right… right?

[yfxeunha]

FRESH BLOOD was always easy to spot. just the boy before her now reeked of the stench, of innocence that, at age eighteen, eunha could no longer afford. jealous, she was, not that she’d tell a soul. her life to this very day was all because of choices she chose to make. who was she to mourn at? herself? no. those were saved for the days where it’s just her and a bottle in the dark of her room. not now, not here.

“first time here?” admittedly, she couldn’t help herself, couldn’t help the curiosity from seeping through the cracks of a carefully constructed wall of indifference as her fingers curl around the plastic in her palm, perhaps already a little inebriated from drinking a little earlier. it is honestly impossible to go to these things sober.

“you look nervous.”

[yfxeunha]

WHITE TEETH TEENS

[xjimmiexyf-deactivated20160511]

here it is, jimin’s first time going to a party in a month and he’s almost forgotten what it’s like. do people actually dance? what are the best places to make out? what the hell is the party code and where the hell are the glow sticks because they’re the one of the best (and probably corniest) act-a-fool props ever.

the lights look dim, naturally candy colored and filled with moving heads and occasional heaps of smoke near the ceiling. the nice view is very nice.

jimin’s steps are careful as he ventures further inside– walking like a spy in amidst thick lasers  the last thing he needs is to step on any toes. especially that of an angry drunk and he’s pretty sure there’s at least three of them lurking about. (it’s no party without petty bull.) once he found an area with just a few people, he sighed in relief with the shoulders and all. he rested his back against the wall– but not without the small shoulder bump– “oops.”

he feels something plop down on his sneaker, lips curling in amusement. he doesn’t judge, and picks it up. “I believe this is yours?”

[yfxeunha]

HERE WE GO. this isn’t the first time, nor was it eunha’s first rodeo. bump-ins like this are frequent at parties where people are too touchy, too intoxicated to care about anything else—such as basic manners. nevertheless, she’s always been “prepared” for this sort of thing, not that eunha knew what she was supposed to be prepared for, other than the fact that it’s better to be than to not. the last thing she wanted was to be caught off guard.

although the male in questioning didn’t look inebriated. actually didn’t look like the type to be there, if she’s honest. eunha might not have taken much interest in that of others, but she’s observant more than anything. and a face like this, eyes cut different and lips carrying a different air of a curve, certainly wasn’t one that she’s seen in places before.

“yes.” her lips twitch slightly, fingers uncurling as she holds her palm upward toward the ceiling, expectant. “thank you...” 

[yfxeunha]

BON VIVANT SOCIETY

LET’S TALK ABOUT LUST. the sultry sin, the inordinate craving for pleasures of the human flesh. eunha had never been much of a hungry creature, urges suppressed by years of guilt, years of shame, years of pain. and yet it is normal for her lust, it is normal for her to want -- to ache. just like it is for any other teenager. with eunha, with veins running busy, she especially wants it on those nights, carefree nights, where the demons are locked away and eunha’s inhibitions run free and she’s allowed to want, need, ache for anything she wished. men and women, it didn’t matter, reputation didn’t matter when the mere press of skin against skin is tantalizingly pleasing.

besides, no one ever spoke of these nights and no one ever will.

LETS TALK ABOUT SEN. sen, she said her name was, without an offer of anything else ( a full name, a surname, either which way ). not that eunha quite cared for any lick of truth between their exchanged words, in all honesty her attention is fixated on the look in her eyes, the careful downturn of her lips. a sad little thing just like herself in a room full of inebriated sin and fabricated love ( eunha never claims to love, but she will adore a willing body like god had crafted it just for her, hers to have for the night ). her own vice clutched in long fingers ( eunha counts bottles of ones, twos, and threes with a knowing smile ), the female before her nothing but a dismal creature looking for release. from her demons, her turmoil, her troubles, she does not care any which way or reason.

eunha wants her.

“you know--you don’t look like you come to these things often,” she starts, lips curved pretty as she shifts forward in her seat, slender fingers sliding over her knee as fingertips slipping under the hem of her skirt, palm pressed warm against her kneecap. oh, but how will she have her, how can she have her — this, her mind races over and over for, teeth dragging over her lower lip as she eyes the other, voice turning coy.

“s’your first time, sen?”

[yfxeunha]

% ツ

Send “%” for a CURIOUS text.

[ sms: jwi ] how was your first day after? remember to hydrate

Send “ツ” for an EXCITED text.

[ sms: jwi ] !! gallery hyundai has a new exhibition we’re going

[rpmememaker]

Send “✆” for a MORNING text. Send “✉” for a text that WASN’T SENT. Send “☎” for a RUSHED text. Send “⁇” for a DRUNK text. Send “✿” for a SUGGESTIVE text. Send “ø” for a LATE NIGHT text. Send “✘” for a HATEFUL text. Send “#” for a RANDOM text. Send “@” for a SCARED text. Send “&” for a LOVING text. Send “%” for a CURIOUS text. Send “ツ” for an EXCITED text. Send “$” for an ACCIDENTAL text. Send “♀” for a HEARTBREAKING text. 

[yfhyunwoo-blog]

you got me [ past ]

[yfhyunwoo-blog]

“ tease. ” he murmurs under his breath, giving a squeeze when she’s in his arms. “ ah yes, and never was something so sweet. i think i’ll have your face engraved in my head forever, you make such a cute expression when you come. ” does he have a filter? no.  “ and again i bring up the topic of your complaints about these things? because .. oh that’s right, you have none. ”

he grins cheekily, like a kid who stole a cookie from a cookie jar and got away with it. hyunwoo unconsciously moves his fingers down her arm, intertwining with her own as he guides her out of the dorms. “ i might just have to get you back for that remark, who knows. ” he adds as the brisk night air hits his cheeks and he pulls eunha closer to his body so she doesn’t take the brunt of it. 

[yfxeunha]

“THANKS.” she retorts, never missing a beat as she watches him, lips twitching with his words. dirty, is the proper word for hyunwoo, a man who doesn’t know how to censor his mouth. but eunha likes dirty. unholy girls usually do, meant to be eaten, swallowed up whole. it makes it that much easier to indulge and set aside her issues. “you make sure to remember it, because that’s the only way you’ll be able to see it -- not through a camera.” she reaches out, pressing her finger into his temple playfully, memory of his proposition still fresh.

he’s right, she knows, but eunha would never give him the satisfaction, instead she walks with him out of the building, a small laugh slipping past at his words. “what will you do? spank me? don’t you remember what happened last time you tried that?” she teases, stepping close with his prompting as she leans into his warmth, heart fluttering slightly at the gesture.

yes. this was the feeling she wanted.

[valteng]

Visit Original Link

i’ll whisk away your heartsigh and bury it in mine

[yfxeunha]

WHITE TEETH TEENS

THERE IS ONLY EVER ONE REASON TO ATTEND THESE THINGS. eunha knows it, the people who knows her knows it, but if you don’t know her, one would suppose it’s difficult to figure out. especially when park eunha looked absolutely miserable ( if you squint, you can see in the way her brows furrow, her fingers twitch ) pressed against the wall of the house. no teenager ever needs a reason to throw a party, as per the reason why she stood lone in a house full of life, bass turned up high to the point of which she felt it shake her entire body and occasionally the liquid sin contained in plastic red.

of course, eunha only shows when some do. only when it’s beneficial to her. only when ever the chipper bobby rounds the corner and passes her a tiny bag of pills of two before going about his merry way. ah, yes, dear sweet bobby. dear sweet high. 

not with intention to take them here, where prying eyes and hungry hands may very well snatch them, eunha is quick to push off the wall, however, not quick enough to slide past the energetic body that bumps into her, grip loosening on the plastic as it slips her grip, landing squarely on the boy’s foot.

“ah.”

[yfxeunha]

PUSH PULL

[pcejaebum-blog]

He knew very well what the plans were for later on, after the dinner party. 

Not that he really ever got to see what she was drawing, he would simply be a drawing silhouette for a few hours in exchange for Park Eunha’s time. In actuality, Jaebum found it extremely brave of her to do something like this. It was ill-intended in the most backdoor way possible, to have someone that was willing to be a beard.

It was one of his father’s associates that threw this party, and of course they all insisted on seeing his “partner”/”date”/”pretty friend”. It was only the beginning of this habit, certainly not the last, and to everyone that didn’t attend Sunhwa - they were a fit couple.

Jaebum had commented on her appearance when he had picked her up, saying he liked it. Just, that he liked it. It was awkward enough to be in this situation, but he felt the need to be genuinely nice to her. Just for involuntarily being a side-social-concept of a “fake girlfriend”. 

He caught eye contact with a few of his father’s friends, who raised their glasses and smiled in greeting. Jaebum the gesture as he heard Eunha’s comment, which actually made him genuinely chuckle. They were facing each other, glasses in their hands that weren’t interlinked. Jaebum leaned forward slightly to kiss her forehead (mostly to save face but partially to allow for the close proximity), before mumbling in the same fashion.

“ Yeah, I know. Feeling’s kinda’ mutual. ” He then began to look elsewhere, raising his voice to a conversational tone (for the sake of accidentally being overheard). “ Thanks for coming, though. Really, didn’t think you’d actually agree to this. ”

Jaebum finished what was left of his beverage, putting it down on the table behind him. Then he looked at her; cue sincere eye contact.

Jesus. Why did he feel so fucking a p o l o g e  t i c ?

Was it that bad? To look at Park Eunha, of all people, as his safe-house from all accusations and dark curiosities that Sunhwa had out for him — was it that bad ? He cleared his throat, looking away again, to minimize the fact that he was so tender with her.

[yfxeunha]

FAIR’S FAIR. nam jaebum had promised her a first-hand session of his body for purposes of art--of being able to sketch every single detail of his bare body, from the dip in his collarbones to the definite cut of his pelvic bone. because yes, jaebum’s body is exquisite. and eunha would want nothing else but to draw it. preserve it in her mind’s eye with something tangible. ( youth is fleeting, life or death a concept that could easily be shattered by one wrong step into the sidewalk tomorrow. and it would be a waste to say goodbye to a specimen like him without documenting. )

still, under the pressure of scrutinization, she wonders if this is really worth it. habitual apathy trembling ( eyes, heart, the way fingers curl tighter around glass ) in the face of judgement, attention remains her true enemy, prevarication its right-hand man, it is ironic that eunha even agreed to such an act, that the daughter to an actress was so poor at acting ( lying, yes, this is undoubtedly a lie, fueled by desperation of acceptance for one and unfiltered perversion of another ).

but she supposes jaebum has his reasons for picking her -- not because she wasn’t good at what she was supposed to do, but because she was willing, because she was cold and less likely to fall for surface gestures of the entire facade. his hand in hers is comforting, as is the kiss pressed against her skin, but eunha understands more than anything it’s fake.

and this, a thought entirely too comforting, eighteen years of age, she was already tired of that mess concept.

“mmn.” but she will try harder for his sake, eunha understands at the very least that jaebum had more at stake than she did, lips curved a muted shy smile as she steps forward, setting down the champagne glass in a table nearby to lift a dainty hand and adjust his collar. in the depths of her heart, she supposes there’s a modicum of pity that she just couldn’t shake off. not that she’d tell him, if anything, the jaebum now is as much as a facade as she was -- his temper, though eunha hasn’t gotten the opportunity to get to know, screams danger. 

and they weren’t that close to begin with.

“well, you did make an offer i couldn’t refuse.” it’s easier to stick to the semi-truth, although for the sake of things, eunha eases in bigger smile, flirtatious in the way slender fingers sliding over soft fabric. “hey,” she starts, mind calculating a plan to make this less of a semi-anguishing situation for the both of them. cocktails at 6, dinner at 7, eunha supposes they could “dance”--her eyes wander over to the ballroom floor, where a small amount of couples went about in merriment--but god had given her two left feet in exchange for skilled hands, she would likely cripple poor jaebum more than anything. 

“should we go for a walk before dinner? i heard they set up the garden for tonight.” decked out in lights with a new fountain set in and everything, as if setting up a “casual” dinner party in a hotel wasn’t upscale enough.

god, rich people were ridiculous. 

[yfxeunha]

♛

sharing a dessert

SHE DOESN’T TALK TO PEOPLE. admittedly, she’s a coward at best. the third year simply doesn’t like attention, doesn’t like to be looked at by more than a handful of people at the time. unlike her mother, she doesn’t relish the burn, doesn’t appreciate the eyes fixated on her, watching her every move, judging with nasty sneers and crooked grins. her mother, the fool, had never seen past the surface of things, never bothered to care for more than the fame. but then she hated it. and loved it. and it swallowed her whole.

and this is why she avoids people. not most, only the “popular”. for they draw the most attention, the most gazes, the most of everything eunha would love to avoid for the rest of high school. and yet, here she was, gaze locked with an infamous in the halls of sunhwa as a mountain of bingsu sits in between. not afraid of the power behind her gaze, rather the onlookers that comes with her appearance. 

lips downturned, eunha could only sigh, inwardly cursing names and gods for the unfortunate outcome of an innocent game between the third year class.

“this is a weird dare.”

[yfxeunha]

♗

your muse falling asleep with their head in my muse’s lap.

INTIMACY HAS NEVER BEEN AN ISSUE. her mother wasn’t able to take that away from her, thankfully, though she had done her deed in leaving her daughter broken; prompted walls of mourning ice around her heart and a disability to live life, as one would have it, normally. but park eunha had always been a hedonist, whether an urge suppressed or embraced through vast periods of her life, at some point, it always comes back to this: she likes touching.

it doesn’t necessarily have to be sex, rather she’s a creature that openly seeks living, breathing comfort she could hold against her pulse and boldly declare it her own for even just a night. comfort that she could mold into suppressing her own demons, the nasty things, picking and clawing till her insides feel raw.

as of late, the source had been jackson, the only type of human only tolerable in sporadic dosages. he’s too bright, her mind would say, never more self-conscious of her own plight, her own sin, than in the presence of a creature brighter than she’s ever been, he’ll put you to shame.

he does, in fact, but it’s never too hard to crush self-contempt between molars, to let it wither into nothingness and gather in the darks of her mind for another rainy day. eunha does it nearly every day with the aide of a pill or two.

so she’s INDULGENT — what wrong is there in that?

“eunha,” eyes closed, breathing soft, she barely registers the presence of one jackson wang nor the timbre of his voice. laughable, given the fact that she laid resting on his lap, his wrist rested beneath her ear, where the drumming of his pulse ( ranging from slow to erratic, as per assumed with his growing restlessness ) calms her weary, beaten mind. 

“are you listening?” 

yeah, she wants to tell him, attention divided between the palpitations of his heart and her slipping sanity, ( there, in the swirl of emotions and dreaming, eunha swears she hears his life story, the beating of his heart at his first kiss, his first fight, his first breakdown; truly a living worth living. a living that elicits envy in the dismal pits of her soul ), i hear you.

but she doesn’t reply.

beat by beat, eunha wills herself rest, wills herself solace driven by the unwavering pulse of jackson wang; a steady drumming of contentment her mother had stolen from her. 

homework will have to wait.

[xxxl0veleenxxx]

HAKUNA MA'VODKA

it means no memories, for the rest of the night. 

[yfxeunha]

BODYACHE

[yfxtaeoh-blog-deactivated202502]

“Your side?”

Taeoh wasn’t dumb, ok? Ok. But different people do deal with pain in the most weird and different ways so… “That’s kidneys stuff… When was the last time you drank water?”

He was willing to help. Despite all his negative traits he was a good kid and the girl was on the ground so that’s what he was supposed to do. Tae get down to sit back on his feet. 

“Grab my hand, I can pull you up and help you get to the bench or something, I don’t know.” 

Even though he didn’t notice right at the spot that all that was just a c t i n g, Taeoh would never tell the teacher. Hey, PE isn’t for everyone and the fact that all students were obligated to do it really sucks so he would probably give it a thumbs up or a whispered congrats dude  because he would for reals drag the girl if she grabbed his hand at this point.

[yfxeunha]

“YES, MY SIDE.”

thankfully, it is believable, or at least to a certain amount -- eunha cared for little less beyond that, not when the other seemed wholly absorbed in helping her. something she should feel sorry for, but who was it hurting? none, she supposes. none except the pangs of pain in her side. sports was indeed not her forte. 

“a while.” oh god, she really wasn’t good at this. lips pressed together, the third year hopes to pass for an expression of discomfort, reaching out to grasp onto the outreached hand while her other worked to move herself, exhaling quietly at his pull.

“thank you...” she trails off, realizing for a good measure that he didn’t know his name ( but to be honest, eunha didn’t know a lot of names -- at the least, his face was memorable, the third year remembers seeing two once. although the verdict’s still out on how her sobriety was at the time ). “i think i’ll be fine if i just--rest, for a bit.”

hide, maybe, from the teacher’s hawk-like eyes.

[yfxeunha]

[yfxeunha]

♞

caring for each other while ill

SHOW NO WEAKNESSES. the world will not stop for the weak. oh, she should know this, should have embraced the lesson by now. but eighteen was still too young, fragility an ever looming curse. there is no one out there that doesn’t crave comfort in their weakest moments.

even if it is only just a fucking cold.

“thanks.” albeit begrudgingly, the gratitude is apparent, as is the small lift of the corner of her lips. the best attempt of seeming friendly that eunha could muster considering the circumstances. the way her head pounds and visions blur the entire way to the infirmary. this is great.

[yfhyunwoo-blog]

you got me [ past ]

[yfhyunwoo-blog]

“ i can think of another thing that would satisfy my hunger. ” he adds, relentless in his ever growing list of sex puns. hyunwoo’s fingers twitch at his side, resisting the urge to pull her back into her room and forget whatever plans they had in mind, but he knew she woudn’t let him regardless. he snickers, beginning to walk forward, other hand picking a piece of her hair up between two fingers, giving a playful tug. “ you are unfortunately correct. you minx. ” the male jests. he pauses for a mere second or two, long enough to pull eunha into his embrace, and press a much deeper and tempting kiss to her mouth.

“ oops, guess i tripped. ” he mocks, moving away only slightly so he can proceed walking toward the exit. “ but to answer your question, my dearest, it is a surprise. i’m a romantic like that. ”

[yfxeunha]

“IMPOSSIBLE.” he is. they both know it. it was never a good thing to mix with boys like him -- and yet here she was, willingly stepping into the devil’s embrace, a sad excuse of a lonely ( broken ) feeble little girl. no, she refuses to think about that, there wasn’t time for that when hyunwoo was around. “minx, we’re reduced to name calling now?” words colored with coy, she allows him the freedom of doing as he wishes, lips parting and tongue snakes out to flick against his lower lip, the action itself tantalizing before she pulls back.

“oops, indeed.” eunha retorts with a knowing smirk, shifting slightly to lean her weight against his with a small sigh. “your type of romance can vary from dinner by the sea to me sitting on your face with petals around us, you sleaze.” 

honestly, she knows him too well.

[yfhyunwoo-blog]

you got me [ past ]

[yfhyunwoo-blog]

he inwardly sighs when she opens the door in a “ how i do enjoy getting to see your gorgeous face everyday” sort of way. his attempt for a casual greeting of a quick smooch is denied, resulting in the biggest pout to ever grace lee hyunwoo’s lips. “ you’re the one that wanted date night, i would much rather stay in and make the entire campus hear you scream my name. ” he says blatantly, a innocent shrug accompanying his words.

he replaces his pout with a knowing smirk, arms crossing over his chest. oh how he loved to tease, especially if the end result was a possible blush or stutter. “ but, i can’t reschedule these reservations so we should really get going. ” hyunwoo comments, arm loosening to swing around her shoulders and pull her into the hall. closing the door, he sneakily places a peck to her jawline. 

“ you’re so mean to me you know. ”

[yfxeunha]

CUTE. she can’t help the feeling that surfaces to his reaction, the pout on his lips and her own threatening to break into an uncharacteristic curve ( thankfully, there is still some modicum of restraint in her. thankfully, hyunwoo was a pervert ). “well we must eat to make it through the night.” she heaves a sigh, purposely dramatic to emphasize her point as her hand lowers to tap his chest lightly. 

“patience--” she chides, cut off by the pull as she steps forward, lashes fluttering at the peck. “i know,” eunha spares a small quirk of her lips, fingers playing with the hem of his coat absently, rubbing and tugging at the fabric. “i also know you like it though.” the second year hums with that, snaking her arm around his waist without much thought. all men like a challenge. even if it was posed as pre-dinner flirting.

“now, where are we going?”