You Wanna Go

I post random shit

[crazycatsiren]

No no you don't understand! I want to watch this show/movie, read this book, listen to this podcast, etc.! But I must be in the right mindset and the exact head space to begin, or I just can't!

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

I'm not ALLOWED to enjoy it yet, I'm not ALLOWED!!!

[goldensunset]

idk who needs to hear this but if you have been putting something off bc it doesn't need to be done until the end of the month. we are almost done with the teens we are approaching the big numbers (the twenties). that date shall dawn upon you swiftly and without mercy before you know it. psa for everyone except me i got plany off time

[teashoesandhair]

Dear everyone who is currently working on a Thing, whatever that Thing may be,

Good luck with the Thing. You can do the Thing. You will do the Thing. You just have to do the Thing.

Best wishes,

Someone who is also doing a Thing

[exhuastedpigeon]

Having "a lot" of followers on tumblr is funny because probably 80% of them are ghost blogs who haven't been on here in like a decade.

It's like, no no, those aren't my followers, that's a graveyard! I'm the caretaker of a thousands of tombs. I love them, but they've been dead for seven years.

[iamladyloin]

But on rare occasions the corpse likes to go for a stroll

[memewhore]

[official-mugi]

This is probably the most inclusive post ever made on Tumblr

[hoodiegal]

“What country is this about?”

“Yes.”

[brionysea]

usamericans, do you remember in the incredibles when syndrome made the robot go haywire just so he could swoop in and 'save the day'

[malfoyesque]

[lettucemakar]

still can't have shit in Detroit ig

[sittingonfences]

Tumblr really is the most webbed site.. who would have thought it’d survive first Facebook, then twitter, now tik tok.. instagram watch out

[bloodbending]

can’t believe tiktok is actually getting banned, twitter is infested with bots and brainworm-infested musk bootlickers, facebook is king of QAnon, instagram caught the plague from facebook and is dying a slow death in real time… and as the dust settles… only Miss Tumblr is left standing… failing upwards once again

[unbotheredmuse]

[chaosthedemon]

[agentsofoakenshiield]

[quasi-normalcy]

Conversation that Tumblr is not ready for:

A Vampire's fangs are also it's reproductive organs

[autumngracy]

I scrolled past that before realizing op was being literal and not just making some kind of weird joke

[plateauofmemories]

Oh please, "the penetration of the vampire's bite as metaphor for sexual penetration" is like, horny classic vampire symbolism 101 🙄 Taking this to the next level of "vampire bite as literal reproductive penetration" is a conversation Tumblr is thoroughly and uniquely prepared for and one that we will all severely regret very shortly

[gothiccharmschool]

Oh, I’m ready to be a spectator for this conversation. I’m ready. 

[dee-the-red-witch]

So, when a vampire doesn’t want to become a vaddy, they use a set of these, right?

[dee-the-red-witch]

Ah. Yes. My own accursed progeny of a post, back to haunt me once more. If only I'd used protection.

[seasaluki-deactivated20151024]

[vieratheartist]

I love everything about this.

[whitepeopletwitter]

[exigencelost]

The problem with having lesbian moms is you try to be super cool and cut all your hair off and buy a leather jacket and wear boots all the time and then you go to some event in your neighborhood and all these women three times your age start cooing “oh you look JUST like your mother when she was your age, my gosh what a blast from the past, oh I just love your hair”

[exigencelost]

And let me be very clear, okay: I’ve seen pictures of my mom when she was my age, and she looked cooler than I ever will. My mom had exactly my fashion sense except she was two point five degrees butcher and habitually took over government buildings. My other mom was about six degrees butcher than that, and SHE had a motorcycle. Both of them have been charged with felony arson. I’m the prep member of my family and there’s nothing I can do about it.

[redstitcher]

Please tell me at some point in your life some dick was like “we’re calling your parents over your behavior” only to have a bigger, more badass version of you come strolling in

[exigencelost]

Look obviously that happened many many times, usually with misogynist or ableist teachers. But I have a BETTER story than that, which is that when I was in 3rd grade, I went to this tiny alternative hippy school—it was a regular public school, it was just small and staffed/run by hippie communists—and my 3rd grade teacher was a woman who had been in an organization with my mother, and they had done direct action together more than a few times. We’ll call her D. One day I was sitting in D’s class, eight years old and bored out of my mind, and I scratched my name into the back of my plastic chair with a rock. Was this reasonable behavior? No. Why did I do it? Only the gods can say. I don’t actually remember doing the scratching, I just remember looking at the rock in my hand and my name on the chair and going, “HUH. That’s not good.”  So obviously I got caught, bc I couldn’t reasonably convince anyone that I wasn’t the one who had done it, since it was MY NAME, and as punishment for this act of arbitrary vandalism I was sentenced to recess detention for two weeks. It was October so this included Halloween. Halloween, to be clear, is a high holy day in San Francisco, and I was devastated to miss the informal festivities that would be occurring at recess that day, and I wept and wailed about this at home for some time until my mother decided that this was disproportionate punishment and took it into her own hands to do something about it.   So my mom walks into D’s office on a day when my mother does not have to be at work at a scheduled time, but D has to get her students from the yard in about ten minutes, and my mom sits down and says to her old friend and comrade, “Miranda is really upset about having detention on Halloween.” And D explains to my mother why the detention was issued, what the circumstances were, and my mother nods, and listens, and doesn’t argue, and doesn’t show any sign of getting up from her chair. And just says again “She’s really upset about having detention on Halloween.”  And D looks at my mother, and she looks at the clock in her office, which is telling her that she has to be on the yard in 2 minutes now, and then looks at my mother again, who shows no sign of having anywhere to be, my mother with whom D has organized and successfully executed multiple sit-ins and takeovers of government & corporate offices, and D says, “Okay, she doesn’t have to have detention on Halloween.”

[local-weirdo]

Tell your moms that we love them.

[exigencelost]

You can express your love by donating to their organization, Prison Radio, which works relentlessly on a shoestring budget to amplify the voices of incarcerated people in the United States!

https://donate.prisonradio.org

[local-weirdo]

An important update!

[noctumsolis]

Note that the URL has changed

Donate

[howlingwolf23]

Reddit just discovered color theory

[unashamedly-enthusiastic]

[lavender-lily]

[gallusrostromegalus]

I met my neighbors and they were so excited that I have dogs because their 2-year-old boy wants a dog and they wanted to see how he got on with an IRL one. And I had to explain that while Charlie and Herschel are perfectly friendly,

Charlie (Southwest Mystery Meat Dog) doesn't give much of a shit about kids (it's the adult humans who have food), but he's fine being stared at or awkwardly patted and even weirdly poked because if he gets bored or annoyed he will just walk away or just climb on the bed where the toddler can harass him. Obviously, any interaction will be closely supervised, but Charlie is an exceptionally patient and low-bite-risk dog. Because he's going to be too busy sucking up to Dad for ham scraps.

On the other hand, Herschel (Jumbo-size cardigan welsh corgi) is a 42lb ground-to-face friendship missile and he will 100% body your toddler like a fucking linebacker and then jump on his kidneys and shove his tongue up the boy's nose to try to make him feel better. He will also chase and boss your baby around like a calf, something most toddlers find distressing, so maybe we wait to introduce them until he can say "No!" and "Sit!" convincingly.