Internet trash Diary

trying

[jackieexxo]

Something about the night changes idk 🧍🏻‍♀️😭

[americanmoths]

outside of the obvious reasons why the hollanov relationship reveal must be crazy to shane’s parents, it’s gotta be wild to them that their shy, awkward kid is dating the league slut. their kid, who cannot even say the word “sex” without blushing, has been fucking a man whose sexual reputation is a topic of conversation. for a decade. they are in fact on a sexcation together. if you want to see them, you need to text them that you’re on your way there, because even if they know you’re coming in advance, they cannot keep their hands off of each other long enough to properly keep track of time. david hollander sees things start to heat up between them and knows instantly that they have probably fucked against every window in that extremely glass house.

idk i’m obsessed with how shane bringing ilya home is not just him coming out as gay, it’s him coming out as an experienced sex freak.

[alltoowille]

Yuna and David having watched their autistic son be so isolated all of his adult life and never having a happy relationship or close friends who understand his anxiety and then finding out that the man they’ve spent a decade hating on his behalf can casually talk him down from a panic attack in less than a minute

[cloudabserk]

BEST DAY EVER ☀️🌸❤️🦋

based on this

[my-2nd-account]

The difference is that jealous Ilya looks homicidal while jealous Shane looks suicidal

[shut-up-gwen]

Ilya: this guy is cute, I should start a stationary bike race so he knows I want to get sweaty together

Ilya: that didn’t quite work. Maybe I should just give him the eye? While I tell him I hope he likes his new city?

Ilya: okay. But surely if I make him drink from my water bottle and brush his fingers when passing it over…?

Ilya: call him pretty. To his face. No way he can miss that

Ilya: desperate measures, I’ll have to tell him I orchestrated this whole ad campaign just so I could see him again

Ilya: WHAT IF I STARTED JERKING OFF IN THESE COMUNAL SHOWERS?

[littlegirlinvisible]

HEATED RIVALRY 1.06: THE COTTAGE + HRTwT VERSION

[jaymanclayton]

As much as David loves Yuna and Shane, you just know some days he's just happy to have Ilya, who is emotionally intelligent and has a great sense of humour and some balance in his approach to hockey.

They exchange looks often, "you're hearing what I'm hearing?" and they probably cook together too.

[finelytaylored]

he was down SO BAD IMMEDIATELY

[ahexagon]

any semblance of a cool guy persona ilya has with the cens is gone as soon as shane joins. shane makes an admittedly lame joke in front of them and ilya is laughing for wayyy too long. you're married he'll let you hit bro you don't have to do all this

[firstprinced]

shane did not think it was good vodka

[hudconov]

Ilya being able to put his hand on his boyfriend’s back in public in front of people for the first time is making me kinda emotional

[cloudabserk]

puppy learning to play

[chubby-cry-baby]

married shane x ilya

ilya pays the bill at restaurants by lying that he’s going to the bathroom - shane starts doing this too and now it’s a race to see who can covertly pay first

shane is super outdoorsy and can fix a lot of stuff around the house AND has tools!!!! ilya calls him mr get it done after hearing the GloRilla song

shane INSISTS on russian only days to accelerate his learning

when shane and ilya hang out with rose, she mentions about how shane was such a chill boyfriend and not possessive at all and ilya cannot control his laughter

shane uses ilya as his personal weighted blanket and other sensory grounding techniques (“can you grab and pull my hair” “kinky” “no”)

shane collected ilya’s hockey cards but had to have a huge binder of everyone’s so it doesn’t seem like he’s only collecting ilya’s cards - ilya has shane’s rookie card in his wallet (awwww)

lots of cuteness aggression doesn’t matter who’s around!!!!!!

ilya’s entire camera roll goes from random pictures to shane shane shane - shane sleeping shane eating shane standing infront of the tv claiming he’s not watching shane in hockey gear shane cooking shane with anya shane at the cottage shane at the camps shane in his childhood bedroom shane shane shane

during the first year they were were officially dating but ilya was in boston; hayden jokes that shane should get lily flowers and draaags him to a flower shop so shane shows up to ilya’s house with lillies & after that ilya sends shane roses to tease him on game days

when apart; ilya sends 100 voice notes a day to shane (shane listens to them all together like asmr)

ilya will kiss shane just to steal lip balm

if shane is laying on the couch ilya will lay on him and put his head in shane’s shirt (“you’re stretching out the material”)

their shared google calendar is run like the navy (“hollander i don’t see blowjobs on thursday? i will add” “STOP IT MY MOM SEES THIS CALENDAR”)

ilya lowballs people on fb marketplace and then uses shane’s account to lowball them further

ilya’s snoring is so bad you can hear it from other rooms but it’s the only noise shane can sleep through its like white noise for shane

ilya posts a single tik tok and it's because he loves the 'husband haul' trend where he spends 45 seconds ragebaiting shane 'weak backhand' 'mr real estate' hollander and shane has the angry kitten face the entire time

ilya writes to do lists / grocery lists in cyrillic and his penmanship is gorgeous (shane is surprised his jock hockey player husband has nice handwriting and that it took him 10 years so see it)

ilya calls troy his best friend and shane gets jealous

shane carries the bags when they go anywhere

ilya is shane’s emergency contact but shane’s parents are ilya’s emergency contact

“my shane”

[hearteyesilya]

shane and ilya's hair evolution +

[thisfeebleheart]

the holy trinity of soft kisses

[themoonandmyman]

The first phrase Shane learns in Russian is ‘I love you’

The second and third actually are ‘harder, please’ and ‘yes, sir’, except he doesn’t tell Ilya.

He just springs it on him mid fuck with a perfect pronunciation and Ilya makes a face like he’s just stepped out into traffic and immediately cums so hard his entire body tenses and he gets a leg cramp so bad he falls off the bed.

He’s entirely obscured from view but Shane just hears a tiny confused (but affectionate) little

‘Shane what the fuck’