hornyposting

27f from Melb don't follow if you are under 18 don't message if under 21

[disgustinggf]

[biwarlockofglitter]

My poor coworker got a fucking earful today

[kaiserouo]

pov you see something alive after being alone for 40 years

[shigure]

🥘 stillstainless following

full dishwasher kind of annoying actually. release me

🔲 tupperware follow

can we all agree that handwash onlys are attention seeking? you're using the same dish soap as the rest of us but you need a sponge bath because you're too good for a shower

🍳 cast-iron following

op some people will die if they're washed with soap at all. unlike certain plastic divas dishes that claim to be "top row only" like that makes a fucking difference.

🔲 tupperware follow

can you actually fuck off

🥣 countercandy mutuals

fav thing to hold

fruit

vegetables

keys

candy

soup

something else/not a bowl

Voting ended onFeb 20, 2024

☕ mug-shots follow

i love being on the top row like you are NOTTT using me for coffee LMAOO

🐾 dogbowl follow

dusty ass

🍴silverwarewolf following

all tucked in. in my drawer. with my polycule <3

#and these takeout chopsticks too i guess #ok

🥡 lunchb0x follow

Excited for summer break 😃 Can't wait to see what kinds of mold i'll collect this year

#ForgottenAgain #BackpackGang #LockerGang

🔁cast-iron following

anonymous asked: Why are you whining about how other dishes like to be washed when you're literally covered in spaghetti stains

tupperware answered: what if i killed myself

🥤 papercup mutuals

WASP IN ME

[recoiled4]

[royalarmyofoz]

Miranda x Virginia GHOSTS Australia 1.08

[innerchildabortionclinic]

chiropractors get paid to injure people. i'd do it for FREE after a long shift

[innerchildabortionclinic]

my charitable and empathetic nature

[thekidsfromyestergay]

Tumblr 2015: omsqueeeeee *ovaries exploding*

Tumblr 2025: OUGHHH MY PENITS EXPLODED

[ashbelero]

On account of the gender transition

[transhuman-priestess]

On account of the gender transition

[achillesinhighheels]

[official-boob-posts]

hobby lobby titmas tree

[purplewolfluna]

applying deodorant

juggling is sweaty work

[twinktorturer]

tbh your idealized chivalrous knight vs my historically accurate horribly behaved knight who mostly goes around drinking ale and extorting and murdering random people. fight

[ozempicofficial]

[facts-i-just-made-up]

It was uncommon for knights in the middle ages to ride horses. Rather, imported Rhinoceroses and Hippopotamae were more capable of withstanding battles. The image of a knight on a horse comes from Don Quixote, whose steed was intended as a play on his feeble nature.

[everythingispirates]

[b-0-ngripper]

[godisafujoshi]

Fuck the haters. I believe in you

[nick-nonya]

woa

[bathroomcube]

[foldingfittedsheets]

I had this truly awful lady I worked with many years ago. She was rude, callous, and generally pretty unpleasant. She was exceptionally homophobic to my face. She told me incredibly upsetting stories about animal abuse.

But even with all that negative karma I don’t think anyone deserves to have their boyfriend literally die on them while having sex.

Which is what happened to her.

He orgasmed and apparently that ruptured a blood vessel somewhere important can’t remember if it was brain but I think so and he died with his dick still inside her which I’m pretty sure is the kind of thing that should guarantee you free therapy for the rest of your life.

But the craziest part was that she performed CPR and actually managed to restart his bodily function which is absolutely mind boggling. Can you imagine going from mid coitus to life saving procedure? The presence of mind she must have had. It’s bonkers.

Ultimately, he didn’t live. While she’d gotten his body going his brain never resumed function and he passed a few hours later.

But because she’d kept his heart beating he was at the hospital when he died and he was an organ donor. They were able to harvest his organs under ideal conditions. Even though she didn’t save him she did save three or four other people by resuscitating him.

[rbsqp]

[harpieisthecarpie]

i couldn't decide on one reaction image but uh

[foldingfittedsheets]

DO YOU THINK I’M JUST GOING TO LET YOU GET AWAY WITH BEING FUNNIER THAN ME?! Right in front of my salad?!?!?