Justa me mario

Ayyyy! How's life?? I hope that even if it isn't the best right now, that my blog at least brings a smile to your face :)

[cinyma]

[ruinedchildhood]

Me when financial aid calls about repaying my student loans

[burntspoons]

[alliwannadoisbangscrew]

me

[ladygolem]

hair: detachable

torso: crushed

dick: out

the lower half of my body is forcibly ejected from the hydraulic press at ninety miles an hour

[huffpost]

[i-am-america-deactivated2016121]

*slow clap it the fuck out*  

[tsunamiwavesurfing]

[grownthot]

people are capable of beautiful things

[soggymoistblent-deactivated2015]

i thought this was going in a bad direction

[aspiringwarriorlibrarian]

“I earned more money than I knew what to do with, and I didn’t want to forget my roots. So I paid back the people who helped me and my family.” He’s also giving elderly and low income people three free meals a day.

Past a certain point, extra money doesn’t really benefit you, so give it those that would benefit. Quit letting people hoard ludicrous amounts of money out of vanity when others need it so much more.

[babyanimalgifs]

“Am I a cat?”

[mogifire]

[hynpos]

and persephone is back to getting dicked down by hades in the underworld

[swingsetindecember]

bold of you to assume she’s not doing the dicking 

[muffinrag]

“Hades is a bottom” is not the hot take I was expecting to see on my dash today, but I think it’s the one I needed

[starlightomatic]

“mood” is basically the equivalent of “amen”

[animatedamerican]

and now I am picturing an entire congregation solemnly intoning “big mood”

[2edge4u]

“May the Lord be with you.”

“Bitch you too the fuck!”

[ondoinganevildeedblues]

best sleeping conditions: freezing fucking cold room but layers and layers of blankets 

[mcavoy]

everyday i think about how frank sinatra tried using his mafia ties to kill woody allen and i wanna know who the fuck stopped him.

[corvus-3]

*yeehaws safely*

[earlysea]

I’m the founder of the “I suck at keeping the conversation going, but I really like talking to you” club

[spnyuri]

the past tense of blink should be blunk discuss

[katesofheaven]

no

think➡️thought

blink➡️blought

[spnyuri]

holy fucking shit you’re on a galaxy brain level of thinking and i respect you

[npr-slut]

so I was lamenting my Transgenderedness today and I go “ugh why am I so bad at gender” and without missing a beat my boyfriend replied “I mean yeah you got an F the first time” and honesty I may never recover

[dr-sparklefairy]

Oh My God

[kaedien]

americans think ABSOLUTELY NOTHIN of driving 7 hours. they’ll drive 7 hours just for dinner. they’ll drive 7 hours just for chips and dip

[verssupremacy]

My friend in the UK told me that they only see their father like 2-3 times a year because they live so far away. When I asked how far do they live, they said that it’s a 45 minute drive……. my commute to work, five days a week is an hour.

[timboallthetime-deactivated2024]

[silly-slacker-person]

If you hand those out on Halloween, you deserve whatever vile shit the kids do to your house

[itsthegrimreaper-deactivated202]

I can give these to my turtle

[silly-slacker-person]

THE ONLY ACCEPTABLE REASPN TO GET THESE: feeding a turtle

[whitepeopletwitter]

Don’t forget to remind me!