9-1-1/9-1-1: LoneStarFan4 ever

[funny-tik-toks]

[audrey-hepbae]

Toucan: “that there just ain’t natural”

[queen-elizabeth-the-3st]

[911lonestar4ever]

all rights go to the original owner

[omnivorousshipper]

*Shaws as kids*

Deckard: why do you want to become a soldier?

Owen: I'm an asset

Hattie: it's pronounced "ass-hat"

[omnivorousshipper]

Dom: Apparently we're getting someone new for the crew

Brian: On purpose?

Letty: Are we stealing them?

Roman: New or used?

Mia: Great responses, everyone

The new person is Owen. Which these questions do apply

[literallyeverythingandeverything]

Lawman gone bad, huh? Such a cliché...

(insp.)

[sleepy-achilles]

Apologies

[incorrect-bau]

Luke: Matt put salt in my coffee because I annoyed him, but I’m going to drink it because I’m petty and I won’t let him win.

[inside-district21]

Mouse: If you ever disrespect me again, I’ll eat your shower curtains.

Adam: I have...glass doors.

Mouse: Well CRUNCHITHY-MUNCHITY then. You really think that’ll stop me!

[inside-district21]

[Can I copy your homework?]

I’ll help you with it: Kevin, Kim and Alvin.

Yeah sure: Mouse and Antonio.

Bold of you to assume I did the homework: Jay.

Lol nope: Hailey.

Wait we had homework???: Adam.

Read 5:55pm: Voight.

[inside-district21]

[When there’s a bug in the District]

Screams for 2 minutes straight: Adam

Calls for help: Kim

Throws a shoe at it: Antonio

Kills it like it’s nothing: Jay, Mouse, Alvin and Voight

Furiously crushes it under their foot: Hailey

Attempts to burn down the district: Kevin

[inside-district21]

Would never stab someone: Kim and Kevin

Would stab someone in retaliation: Jay and Antonio

Yells “I won’t hesitate bitch!” First: Adam, Mouse and Hailey

Would stab without warning: Alvin

Would stab as a warning: Voight

[inside-district21]

[In a haunted house]

Jumps at every scare: Kim

Laughs to cover their fear: Adam and Antonio

Goes in confident and comes out a nervous, scared mess: Kevin and Hailey

Unfazed: Voight

Laughs at the stupid costumes: Alvin

Punches the actors: Jay and Mouse

[inside-district21]

[Among us]

Literally the perfect detective: Voight

Always knows when Adam is sus, acts logically and always tries to vote the right person: Kim and Kevin

Bodyguards Mouse while he does his tasks: Jay

Just wants to do his tasks: Mouse

Never know who it is, doesn’t trust anyone: Hailey and Alvin

Dies first: Adam and Antonio

[inside-district21]

Voight: Anything you say in the next thirty seconds is free, I won’t fire you. Starting now.

Jay: I think you’re cocky, arrogant, bossy and pushy. You have a king complex and you don’t think of anyone besides yourself.

Voight: Wait a min-

Jay: I have twenty-three seconds left and I’m not done.

[911lonestar4ever]

Jemma: If you bite it and you die, it's poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it's venomous.

Fitz: What if it bites me and it dies?

Jemma: That means you're poisonous.

Daisy: What if it bites itself and I die?

Jemma: ...That's voodoo.

Trip: What if it bites me and someone else dies?

Jemma: That's correlation, not causation.

Bobbi: What if we bite each other and neither of us die?

Hunter: That's kinky.

[gore-hovnd]

*while the Trisk is collapsing*

Steve, picking up Nat: Grab the small ones first! their tiny legs are useless!

Jack: *looks at Brock*

Brock:...you fucking dare–

[mytrashbin]

Sitwell:

Rumlow & Rollins:

[hydrumlow-deactivated20230521]

The funniest thing about writing Hydra Husbands is imagining all the stupid shit Brock says and does as narrated by Frank Grillo's voice.

[911lonestar4ever]

All rights go to hyrumlow