This one time at band camp...

Hi, Tumblr. I'm Horchata. I'm a blogger. missing you Sophie xoxo

[yellow-yarrow]

[escuerzoresucitado]

shooo

[mistbjorn]

[thickness-protection-program]

One of my dude coworkers was like "we should both quit and start an onlyfans." We??

[thickness-protection-program]

Update he is in fact bi. Happy pride everybody

[thickness-protection-program]

Update he and his 40 year old "roommate" like to bump coochies and didn't rule out the possibility of a third. Happy pride everybody

[thickness-protection-program]

Update he just offered to give me my first bottoming experience happy pride everybody

[thickness-protection-program]

Update me and him made out in the meat cooler on the clock happy pride everybody

[depsidase]

[brightlotusmoon]

[doomdaysdecays-deactivated20251]

me: if only there was a fruit that looks like an apple but is actually a pear

the baffling papple:

[lesbeid0u]

[inlandwest]

[goth-queen]

[pancakeke]

I’m watching season one simpsons

[judgejudyofficial]

this is because fisting is commendable while being a fistee is a mortal sin

[l3thalp3tal]

[beardedmrbean]

Periscope up

[birds-in-posts]

Green heron (Butorides virescens)

[flareonfloof]

birds have secret bones we're not allowed to know about

[depsidase]

[punkrock-bottom]

Cold weather enjoyer FREAKS when they’re shivering and tensed up and can’t feel their toes and their face hurts and

[milf--adjacent]

[dogpuppy]

[bruzum]

this meme having made more noise than the album

[beardedmrbean]

Next up someone is going to claim that the Narnia series isn't kids books.

Kids books is probably not the best way to word it, you can enjoy them at every age, including your childhood, as you get older you may find new truths in them, but they're still good for any age.

[danielkanhai]

it would suck being a new immortal. like it’d be 2109 and people would go, “what was it like seeing ancient civilizations rise and fall like that? seeing the pyramids being built? watching the expansion and growth of the new world?” and i’d just be like, “no…no i was born in 1991. so like, wow i’m gonna see some cool stuff, but, i mean i’m not that much older than just a really, really old person, you know? phones were big back then. so big. but only for like ten years, then they got like, as good as they are now. uh. rhinos existed. don’t think i ever saw one in person. cool, good talk.”

[ayellowbirds]

even worse, imagine being an immortal who keeps missing stuff. “What was it like seeing the pyramids being built?” “Fuck if I know, I was in Madagascar.” “Oh, okay. Well, how was the Renaissance?” “I fell down a hole in Scotland and people thought I was an enchanted well for four hundred years, it was over by the time I convinced someone to get me out.”

[erkhyan]

And now, a lesson in biases:

We barely know anything about Madagascar pre-500CE. We don’t even know whether the island had a permanent population before then, despite finding a bunch of much older signs of temporary human presence.

Malagasy mythology makes mention of the vazimba, a “precursor” ethnic group that might or might not be distinct from Madagascar’s current population.

The point is, we do not know.

So you were in Madagascar when the pyramids were being built in Egypt, i.e. during one of the most obscure, most undocumented parts of Madagascar’s human history?

Oh, buddy, you better go and make a bunch of anthropologists and archeologists really happy RIGHT NOW instead of feeling bad about missing everyone else’s pet Major Event.

[ayellowbirds]

It’s been a decade since we left that comment and you have the best reply anyone’s left to it.

[rosefinchie]

how it all feels lately

[buried-in-stardust]

OP: "Decarbonized formaldehyde is great. Just wash daikons with decarbonized formaldehyde and they turn white."

"Decarbonized formaldehyde" (脫碳甲醛) is an online phrase used to make fun of people that blindly avoid chemicals. Formaldehyde (H2CO) decarbonized is water (H2O).

[eng by me]