It must be so painful being a closeted ace on tumblr nowadays. We fought hard to make asexual resources more widespread, because young aces deserve answers. The alternative is daunting. And I lived it.
When I was a teenager, I destroyed my body by forcing myself into sexual situations because I didn’t know about asexuality. Well, I knew about it, but of course I wasn’t asexual. No one in their right mind would be.
I was young, Asian, depressed, and a closet ace. All my access to basic human decency relied on sex. I didn’t know how to address sexual intimacy, or romantic relationships. I didn’t have any asexual vocabulary or knowledge of what it meant to be ace.
I’ll never be able to regain a whole chunk of my life. That’s all been tainted by years of neglect and abuse.
So I’m part of a movement that’s trying to prevent such a thing from happening again. And this bullshit pushback that I’m seeing? This claim that our attempts to save ace youth is somehow a detriment to people who aren’t ace? That our readiness to offer options is to blame for the actions of our mutual oppressors?
My closeted, confused young self was on the road to death. That’s inarguable. That’s what happens when aces have no options.
Even now, I struggle with asexual explicitry and how to embrace sex as a queer survivor. I NEED asexual visibility. And I need others like me to find a community with.
This shitty trend of trying to erase asexual growth is flat out violence.