[lovbun-deactivated20180210]

Ok so this post is extremely long and I put it all together for my blogs Feeling sad page but as I don’t have a huge amount of followers I realize so many people are not seeing this information so I’m posting it here too!

alternatives without harming yourself:

holding/squeezing ice.

splashing your face with water.

getting a rubber band and snapping it against your skin (this could hurt, though it’s better than other ways that people usually choose to self-harm).

take a hot shower or bath.

eat something sour. it will take your mind of the urge. (lemon, sour lollies)

massage where you want to self-harm.

get a red pen or red paint and draw/paint over where you usually self-harm.

remind yourself as to why you shouldn’t do it. (scars, harms organs, leave memories etc…)

describe what you are feeling. (is the urge/pain in your chest, fists, legs, arms, head).

killing yourself will not help. it is not a solution.

you have your whole life ahead of you. you have so many more years that you can accomplish things in. for example;

having a family.

getting married.

to watch the sun rise.

to watch the sun set.

to save someone else’s life.

finish school.

get your dream job.

to laugh.

to smile.

to go camping.

travel to new places.

to wake up every morning to the person you love.

friends.

family.

to keep that promise you made.

to accomplish a goal.

to meet your idol.

to listen to new music.

theme parks.

video games.

chocolate.

to be able to look back and say “i made it”.

what you’re going through is temporary.

in case you need to hear this:

you are loved.

you are wanted.

you are needed.

you are beautiful.

you are handsome.

you are important.

you are not alone.

you are okay.

you are strong.

you are worth it.

you are smart.

you are not a failure.

you are useful.

you are going to be okay.

———————————————————————————————————

abuse

coping

caring for yourself

domestic abuse

chat rooms

survivors chat

fort refuge

pandy’s

add/adhd

coping

coping tips for attention deficit disorder

12 best tips for coping with adhd

50 tips on the management of adult attention deficit

medication

adhd medication chart: compare drugs for add and adhd

drugs used to treat adhd/add

add/adhd medications: are adhd drugs right for you

adhd medication side effects, drug types, precautions

addiction

coping and recovery

tools of recovery: addiction coping skills

5 ways to deal with urges and cravings

after rehab: 5 ways for addicts to cope

addiction recovery

coping with urges

dealing with cravings

anger

coping

strategies to keep anger at bay

anger management: 10 tips to tame your temper

anger management: tips and techniques

feeling angry

controlling anger — before it controls you

dealing with anger

how to cope with anger

anger management: what works and what doesn’t

ten commandments of anger regulation

anxiety

coping

a list of stress relievers

identifying and managing anxiety

11 assorted anxiety tips for anxiety sufferers

how to work through feelings of isolation

tips and tricks for dealing with anxiety

anti-stress breathing tips

how to stay under control with severe social anxiety

coping with social anxiety

managing stress

how to help a friend with anxiety

help guide (therapy)

half of us

job interviews and social anxiety

dealing with anxiety

coping with test anxiety

tips for flying anxiety

grounding techniques

more grounding techniques

even more grounding techniques

mindfulness

belly breathing

living with anxiety

social anxiety disorder self help tips.

coping with flashbacks

what anxious racing thoughts are like for me

using a thought diary

panic attacks

how to handle panic attacks

exploring and coping with panic attacks

10 rules for coping with anxiety and panic

tips to cope with panic attacks

rules for coping with anxiety and panic

understanding and coping with panic attacks

understanding and helping panic attacks and panic disorders

help guide (panic attacks & panic disorder)

coping with panic attacks workbook

rules for coping with panic

panic attack workbook 2

medication

help guide (anxiety medicine)

common medications for anxiety disorders

guidelines for medication use

bipolar disorder

coping

bipolar disorder and self-help

living with bipolar disorder

how to deal with bipolar disorder without medication

10 ways to cope with bipolar disorder

coping skills

help guide (self help)

bipolar support tumblr

medication

help guide (bipolar disorder medication guide)

help guide (treatment)

chat rooms

healthfulchat

bipolar world

healing well

depression

coping

how to cope with depression

how to cope with depression 1

natural depression treatments

ways to deal with depression/stress

tips to help overcome loneliness

10 tips on how to work through feelings of social isolation

8 tips to overcome loneliness

ways to deal with depression/stress

having a bad day?

make a comfort box

10 things to do when you feel like crap

how to find a new normal in the middle of depression

you are not alone in the way you think you are

reasons to stay alive

how to stop trying to think yourself into happiness and actually arrive there

cheer me up

help guide (dealing with depression)

help guide (helping someone with depression)

medication

what to expect with antidepressants

finding the right anti-depressant

chat room

healthfulchat

healing well

eating disorders

recovery

281 reasons to recover

eating disorders and emotional eating test

relapse prevention

bloating, indigestion, & feeling too full

why you must eat

learning to love your body

tips to stop restricting

dealing with weight gain

10 steps to bulimia recovery workbook

coping with exercise addiction

tips to help with bulimia recovery

help guide (emotional eating)

help guide (binge eating)

help guide (bulimia)

help guide (helping someone with an eating disorder)

help guide (treatment and recovery)

stop hating your body

body positive zone

self care 101

self esteem

30 day self esteem challenge

developing positive self esteem

learning-to-love-yourself

something fishy

ways of coping with eating disordered behaviors

the addiction help center

friends with illness

how to deal/talk with bipolar and depressed people

what to do when your friend is talking about suicide

what to do if someone you know is overdosing

what to do if your friend is hurting themselves

how to help someone who is suicidal

here’s what you tell someone who wants to commit suicide

tips for looking after someone with depression

friends with metal illness?

what to do when someone is suicidal

help guide (helping someone with depression)

grief and loss

help guide (coping with a breakup or divorce)

help guide (coping with grief & loss)

help guide (coping with pet loss)

help guide (supporting a grieving person)

help guide (the five stages of grief)

ocd

coping and treatment

natural treatment options

treatments for obsessive-compulsive disorder (ocd)

additional treatment options for ocd

residential treatment for ocd

medications for obsessive-compulsive disorder (ocd)

a new relationship to your obsessions

how to find help for ocd

ocd: exposure therapy versus medication

cognitive therapy for ocd

chat rooms

healthfulchat

ocd-uk

perfectionism

coping

how to overcome perfectionism

learn to manage perfectionism

how to overcome perfectionism & procrastination

perfectionism - stress management

10 steps to conquer perfectionism

perfectionists coping with failure

ptsd

coping

coping with flashbacks

self help strategies for ptsd

coping with traumatic stress reactions

post-traumatic stress - self-help guide

understanding and coping with ptsd

coping with ptsd

schizophrenia

coping

living with schizophrenia

coping with schizophrenia

schizophrenia coping and recovery

schizophrenia: coping with delusions and hallucinations

paranoid schizophrenia coping and support

treatment

an introduction to the treatment of schizophrenia

treatment of schizophrenia

drugs to treat schizophrenia

common drugs and medications to treat schizophrenia

treating schizophrenia successfully

self-harm

cut something that’s not real skin

half of us

help guide

recover your life

self-injury outreach & support

how to care for cuts

resisting cutting

25 ways to avoid self injury and prevent self harm

tips to help stop cutting

99 coping skills: things to do instead of cutting

what to do when someone sees

how to fade/cover scars

alternatives for cutting 1

alternatives for cutting 2

alternatives for cutting 3

alternatives for cutting 4

alternatives for cutting 5

self-love

how to stop putting yourself down

self confidence

how to improve your self-esteem

how to be ok with yourself

tips on self-love

confidence

learn to love yourself

when told you are not pretty

emergency compliment

lessons for self-love

suicide

coping with suicidal thought

what to do when someone is suicidal

how to help someone who is suicidal

here’s what you tell someone who wants to commit suicide

help guide (suicide prevention)

help guide (dealing with suicidal thoughts & feelings)

therapy

how to get free therapy

getting a therapist - a brief step-by-step

psychiatrist, psychologist, therapist or counsellor?

50 signs of good therapy

50 warning signs of questionable therapy

———————————————————————————————————

the quiet place

things to do when you feel bad

when you’re not having a good day

reminders

self care suggestions

take a break

the thoughts room

90 second relaxation

the dawn room

the comfort spot

control a rainstorm

calm

how to make changes in your life

imalive

crisischat

7 cups of tea

kids help phone

positive love network

trans lifeline: 877-565-8860

depression hotline: [phone]

suicide hotline: [phone]

lifeline: 1-800-273-8255

trevor project: 1-866-488-7386

sexuality support: 1-800-246-7743

eating disorders hotline: [phone]

rape and sexual assault: 1-800-656-4673

grief support: 1-650-321-5272

runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000

exhale: after abortion hotline/pro-voice: 1-866-439-4253

[lovegaygirls]

because this can help people

[corey-and-the-slipboys]

@iwasmakingitreign

[itsbetterthananal]

an image i made in case you need a reminder today

[howluckyihavebeen]

[memecage]

[mybrainkindahoyts]

When your whole squad backs you up in a fight but you music af.

[mybrainkindahoyts]

Thanks for 1,000 notes guys 💕

[sawftbinch]

i’m just mad that they were able to hide 2 whole people + trombones behind one person that’s amazing

[crashingthatmode]

when everyone in the campaign is a bard

[lilliminellieee]

I haven’t seen this in YEARS 😂

[traumasuggestion]

I’m allowed to be angry about what happened. I am allowed to be angry about what you did.

[thebestoftumbling]

[letmefeelmyoats]

UNMUTE THIS

[stingywithmycootiecat]

😩😩😂😂😂😂

[hexagonification]

“Turn one way and stick with it, Tina.  TINA, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, TURN AWAY OR STOP!  THE BRAKES, TINA!  THE LEFT– YOU’RE ABOUT TO HIT THAT CAR!  THE BRAKES!  HIT THE BRA–!”

[thud]

“Ohhhh my god it’s bad.”

[prokopetz]

I’m not ace myself, so I’m coming at the whole acephobia thing from an outsider’s perspective, and as such, it’s not my place to speak to the experience of those on the receiving end of it.

However, as a bisexual dude, I can observe that many of the arguments that are employed to establish that ace folks have no place in the queer community are strikingly similar - indeed, at times practically word-for-word identical - to the arguments that were for many years (and in some circles still are) employed to establish that bisexual folks have no place in the queer community.

It’s enough to make a guy suspicious on general principle, you know?

[prokopetz]

I’ve gotten a few messages asking for (well, in some cases more “demanding”) elaboration, so: here are a few of the primary areas in which I’ve observed that arguments against bi inclusion and arguments against ace inclusion tend to exhibit significant overlap. There may well be others - these are simply the ones I’ve run into most frequently.

The Passing Argument

It has been argued that bisexual folks don’t have any grounds to complain about discrimination and violence suffered in relation to their orientation, because a bisexual person is able to pass as straight simply by choosing partners of the appropriate gender. Therefore, any discrimination and violence that a bisexual person does experience must be construed as voluntarily undertaken, since they could have passed, and freely chose not to.

This argument is similarly applied to ace folks via the assertion that being ace poses no particular barrier to seeking a partner of a socially acceptable gender, so any failure to do so must likewise be construed as voluntary.

The Performativity Argument

It has been argued that bisexual folks ought to be excluded from queer communities because sexual orientation is purely performative; i.e., being gay is defined in terms of currently having a sexual partner of the same gender.  A bisexual person who has a partner of a different gender is functionally indistinguishable from a straight person, and must therefore be regarded as straight. Conversely, a bisexual person whose current partner is of the same gender must nonetheless be regarded with suspicion, because they could “turn straight” at any time simply by leaving that partner.

This argument is similarly applied to ace folks via the assertion that their orientation has no discernible performative component; an ace person is functionally indistinguishable from a straight person who simply isn’t involved in a sexual relationship at that particular moment, so ace folks must therefore be regarded as straight by default.

(An astute reader may notice that the passing argument dovetails neatly into the performativity argument: those who choose not to seek partners of a socially acceptable gender may be dismissed because any violence and discrimination they experience is a consequence of their voluntary failure to pass, while those who do seek such partners are performatively straight and therefore to be shunned. It’s a neat little system.)

The Mistaken Identity Argument

It has been argued that, while bisexual folks may suffer discrimination and physical and sexual violence, they’re not targeted by such acts because they’re bisexual. Any discrimination and violence a bisexual person suffers in relation to their orientation is suffered because they were mistaken for a gay person. Any effort on their part to discuss such experiences is therefore to be regarded as appropriative, in spite of the fact that they personally experienced it. In short, a bisexual person’s own experience of violence and discrimination doesn’t truly “belong” to them: it “belongs” to the purely hypothetical gay person their persecutors allegedly mistook them for.

This argument is applied to ace folks practically verbatim - no particular adaptation is necessary.

[lierdumoa]

I’ll add The Contribution Argument, which involves one of these gatekeeping behaviors:

1) rewriting history to erase bisexual and asexual contributions to political LGBTQ rights movements, and then claiming that bisexuals and asexuals have never done anything for the community at large

2) arguing that modernday bisexuals and asexuals should be excluded from current political movements because our goals are distinct from, or even contradictory to the goals of the LGBTQ rights movement at large

3) interpreting any attempt on the part of bi/asexuals to make safe spaces for ourselves within the community as an attack on LG safe spaces, generally by reframing bi/ace pride as homo/lesbophobia, or by dismissing accusations of bi/acephobia as inherently homo/lesbophobic

In other words, arguing that bisexuals and asexuals, rather than being contributing members of the community, are parasites on the community, leeching from, and undermining the community and its goals.

[prokopetz]

The Contribution Argument is an interesting one because it goes way beyond popular biphobia.

It’s often been asserted that bisexual folks ought to be excluded from the LG community because that community is specifically for folks who experience homophobia, and bisexual folks don’t experience homophobia, save by misidentification. (See the Mistaken Identity Argument, above.)

However, anybody who’s over the age of 30 can tell you that the positioning of the experience of homophobia as the community’s great unifier is, itself, a relatively novel development.

Up until quite recently (and by “recently” I mean as recently as the mid 1980s), even lesbians were routinely characterised by the leaders of mainstream gay rights activism as unwelcome parasites, riding on the movement’s coattails and contributing nothing in return.

Not only is identifying the experience of homophobia - defined narrowly as discrimination against those who are actively involved in sexual relationships with persons of the same gender - as the sole qualifier for inclusion a totally arbitrary place to draw the line, it’s baldly ahistorical.

Historically, a great many folks who do experience this type of homophobia have routinely been left out in the cold by mainstream activism for gender and sexual minorities - and the Contribution Argument, as you’ve outlined it here, is one of the primary tools that’s been used to justify that exclusion.

[archivedoldblogsry]

this post is literally just “why won’t those big meanie gays let asexuals in their club??? :(” written in the form of a jargon-filled essay for a philosophy class

[queeraro]

I love your wording; because that’s precisely it. Its the “gay club.” As in, its the same fuckers who wanted us bi people to be excluded. It’s the same people who argued that we should drop the “T” to focus on the “gay movement.”

Newsflash: no one wants an invitation to that party. No one is “invading.” No one wants to be included in your “gay club.”

What we want is shits like you to quit perpetuating intra community bigotry and hatred in the LGBT+; because the only ones treating it like a “club” are those of you that check the “queer credentials” of everyone looking for a safe space and stamp their hands with “gay enough I guess” to let us pass through the gates. (Not that we get the same treatment as the ~VIP cis gays~ anyway.)

Anyway, nice to know that you people are still ignoring when bi ppl speak and repurpose that biphobia as ace hatred in the same breath :)))))) kinda :))))))) reinforces the points above :))))))))))

[bullgod1997]

reblogging for the valid statements and the dismantling of the pos.

[monikakrasnorada]

[acapelladitty]

[ithotyouknew-deactivated2015051]

The sex industry didn’t invent misogyny. Escorts don’t create our own clients. Me selling sex doesn’t cause men to want to hurt me. But, criminalizing it makes men who want to hurt me know they have power to do so, without me being able to safely seek recourse. So, when you fight for laws that further push me and others like me underground, who are you really helping?

[thehappyhooker-deactivated20190]

THIS

[animehall-deactivated20231007]

by ZandraArt

[slyandthefamilybook]

when someone says “now that he’s a girl” about a trans girl

[metalalbumswithgooglyeyes]

Origin-Derptithesis

[metalalbumswithgooglyeyes]

Dimmu Borgir

[metalalbumswithgooglyeyes]

Derpklok

[metalalbumswithgooglyeyes]

[metalalbumswithgooglyeyes]

Meshuggah - Derpzen