words of affirmation i repeat on the daily
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words of affirmation i repeat on the daily
Introductions to academic papers will be like "everyone knows that the sea is cold (citation), as well as salty (5 different citations). Things live in there (citation) and the environment is important to that (2 citations)"
heated rivalry has been like the reintroduction of wolves in yellowstone for this website
I usually only recommend anime and visual novels on here but I've gotta confirm that Kevin Can F**k Himself lives up to the hype. You might have heard of the gimmick that the husband lives in a sitcom while his wife's POV is more like Breaking Bad. You need to know that the gimmick works wonders for the show's presentation of abusive relationships that don't fit the stereotype. This really is how so many men and women are, living in entirely different genres under the same roof. The plot, spread across two remarkable eight-episode seasons that tell a complete story, is jagged and dramatic. The acting is excellent across the board, especially Mary Hollis Inboden as Patty. And you better believe there's a toxic yuri dynamic at the center. It's pretty gay. Catch it on Netflix, my partner and I finished it with a week
A thing I find really important about the way Kevin Can Fuck Himself goes about its job: Allison is kind of a mess. She’s self-centered, she doesn’t put other people’s needs first, she makes reckless choices that endanger herself and others. And the show says: yes. Right. She’s flawed as fuck. And she still does not deserve any of what’s happening to her. It could be argued that she is, in fact, this flawed as a direct product of her trauma. Her self-absorption, unlike Kevin’s, is actually self-preservation. It puts Patty in danger. It tunes out Diane’s pain. It capitalizes on Sam’s relationship problems. And still, the show says: yes. Right. She’s going about this in fumbling, worrying ways. And she still does not deserve any of what’s happening to her.
Know how we know this? How we really know this, outside of our own objectivity, our own awareness of the abuse she’s enduring even to the soundtrack of laughter?
Because Tammy is the one to find her. Because Tammy is the one holding the cards at the end of the game. Tammy, who does not like Allison. Who sees so clearly the complicated, messy, dangerous person Allison can be. The mistakes she is prone to making in the name of desperation. How imperfect she is at every level. And Tammy, who is the character most explicitly set to call Allison on all of her shit, to drag her before a court of law, to lean on that hot-button of whether or not she’s a “good person” until it breaks—lets her go. Folds the cards up, puts them in her pocket, and leaves.
Because Tammy, like the show, like the thesis statement of abuse is never earned, never deserved, never warranted, understands. This is a world that so often sanitizes women after it’s too late to save them. A world that insists she should have done more to get out. A world that insists you should be kind and moral and perfect, or maybe you got what was coming to you. This is a world that sees fighting back as an equally heinous crime. As punishable, if not more so, than the actions of the instigator.
But this show doesn’t want to play that game. This show doesn’t want to fuck with it at all. Allison doesn’t have to be perfect and moral and above reproach. Allison has blood on her hands, and a DUI neatly ignored, and knowingly has an affair with her married boss. Allison hurts her friends sometimes, and she makes awful decisions out of desperation, and she doesn’t always pay attention to other people’s plotlines. And the show says: yes. Right. She’s making choices you probably should not agree with.
And she still does not deserve any of what is happening to her.
So me and my dad just got done watching Kevin can f himself like the whole series in one day
And I kept being like Allison's not in the wrong. And he was just being like no her husband is an asshole he's an idiot he's the worst kind of guy but like shes still doing bad things. All she needs to do is ask him for a divorce why is she such a coward why won't you just ask him for a divorce and all they'll do is split assets.
And then the final episode happened
And I got to watch this 56-year-old man take such a sharp deep breath when he punched that wall
And I was like this is the reality. This is what most people face. She didn't ask him because she knew this was her future this was how she was going to end. He was going to kill her. He was going to lash out and attack her. And he was just dead silent through like the last half quarter of the show
And I was like yeah she escaped alive but look what she lost all from his doing. What do you think would happen if she hadn't done what she did before.
Yeah she didn't die, do you think he wouldn't have for one second? And dad was just like he's a monster
Yes. That is literally the entire point she was a battered woman but because you were seeing things through his lens half of the time you didn't see how bad it really was and she just looked like she was blowing things out of proportion.
what's so cool about "kevin can fuck himself" is the way it forces you to reframe what are otherwise painted as harmless sitcom antics. it makes you really think about it.
for example, the sarcastic asides typical of a sitcom are actually cruel and abusive when rooted in reality. while you're watching the scene, set up in saturated colors and a laugh track, you have to force yourself not to slip into the banter.
it's a depiction of how abusers manipulate perceptions and get everyone else to go along with it. how it's normalized as "harmless" and laughed away.
it's a really good show.
You know that post that was going around like a year ago. That said something like 'hey you don't need to wear any makeup' and people kept commenting shit like 'yeah just a little eyeliner is enough'. This is how this post feels to me
That one friend who doesn't really show it but they actually do not fuck around when it comes to simon and garfunkel
You should be starting a recipe book. I don't give a shit if you're only 20-years-old. The modern web is rotting away bit by bit before our very eyes. You have no idea when that indie mom blog is going down or when Pinterest will remove that recipe. Copy it down in a notebook, physically or digitally. Save it somewhere only you can remove it. Trust me, looking for a recipe only to find out it's been wiped off the internet is so fucking sad. I've learned my lesson one too many times.
One of my favorite parts about the writing of Howl's Moving Castle is how easy it is to write off all the things from our world at first as him just being a weird wizard™ (also thanks to bestie @jutenium for spotting this I wouldn't put it like that without you!!/pos). Sure, Sophie uses weird descriptions, but readers have every reason to believe them because of the way Howl is presented as a character. When Sophie says he wrote with a quill that doesn't need an ink, you wouldn't think it was actually a ballpoint pen, you would think Howl had just enchanted his quill so that it wouldn't need ink! When she adds that she can't make out a single word, you think he has matchingly terrible handwriting, but in fact Sophie has simply never seen a pen writing. When she sees the mysterious labels on his books, you think he's keeping a lot of obscure magical literature, but it's really just an encyclopedia and a guide like "Top 10 Rugby Tips." When Sophie notices the bottles in Howl's bathtub, you think they're some kind of magical jars where he keeps girl's hearts, but I'm almost certain that they're just 'Dove' and 'Head and Shoulders' that he's enhanced with his spells and put silly labels on. When you read Calicifer singing a song in a language Sophie doesn't understand, you think it's some kind of ancient cipher or code, but it's actually just a rugby song in Welsh that Howl sings when he's drunk. And finally, when you see the terrifying black door, which is completely shrouded in darkness, you imagine a passage to an eerie, mythical place, similar to what Miyazaki showed us - but it's just fucking Wales.
I will never relate to a character harder than I do Howl Jenkins-Pendragon.
He had a choice: Give your heart to a Fire Demon and live in an ever moving castle as you are being hunted by a vicious witch who wishes to consume you
OR
Pay back your student loans
And he chose the former. So real of him. I would done the same, no second thoughts.
do you all remember in the early 2010s where people were talking about freeing the nipple and that mixed-gender sports should become a thing and the removal of period tax and all of that and then some people realised that would mean trans people too ans they instantly decided to revert to bioessentialism 101 and now i have to see grating sentences like Well maybe jeopardy should be gender-segregated because males have a biological advantage in pressing a button
being alive is so inherently humiliating i need to get over it. it's like being mad about breathing oxygen girl it's gonna happen anyway