dumb angel @agnetafrieberg - Tumblr Blog

Don tells you to start over. Will you?

I should quit substances for good. except my meds

#I've been for hours on blow and vodka and I don't feel so hot. still sad and neurotic #had another heart to heart with my dad. he said he doesn't have money to get me inpatient and I said I will quit the drinking but I know #it will be hell on earth

last night my dad yelled that I was a disgrace in his and my mom's life and that I should kill myself (multiple times) and burn in hell. so I guess that's how it goes

I wanna visit my neighbor girlfriend and see how she's doing and give her some of my drink but I know seeing her smoking crack will trigger my desire for blow and in the end it's not worth it. as much as I like her

#tw addiction

this week started out hard with me relapsing again. yesterday I went to therapy but still felt extremely depressed and missing alcohol, I cried a lot. today I woke up depressed and cried again and then I got the news that someone special to me has been involuntarily committed by their family due to alcoholism. I cried a lot more and now I'm drinking and crying again

#tw addiction #why does it have to be like this

is anybody out there? can anybody hear me?

my dad called and I told him I relapsed again. he was incredibly understanding about it and begged me to go to a NA meeting tomorrow. I feel embarrassed going back again but I must do it, for him and for myself. I'm tired of going back to this hellhole

#tw addiction #I plan on checking out AA as well #since we don't have money for me to go inpatient again I should look for support groups #my new therapist told me that #it didn't work before but maybe if I try harder...#I'm just glad my dad was understanding about it and I'll do it for him

papayajuan2019

can i make you a playlist with 8 thousand songs

papayajuan2019

can i make you a playlist with 8 thousand songs

showing up to group therapy tomorrow hungover on alcohol and blow and with a fucked up nose

#tw addiction

I say no and then relapse

why did you do this to me. why did you come back into my life to treat me like worse than shit. why did you have to break my heart again and again and leave me hollow

você jogou tudo isso fora por nada.

98% of the time I sabotage myself by saying "it's just a few drinks, I won't relapse on blow cause of it" but after an hour or so my mind starts thinking obsessively about it and making plans. especially if it's hard liquor

#tw addiction

quero que você seja feliz

hei de ser feliz também, depois

most people are just heartless and that's an universal truth

xalatath

SMOKED SALMON IS THE ONLY THING THAT NUMBS THE PAIN

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