Product Placement
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Origami Around
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Sade Olutola
DEAR READER
wallacepolsom
taylor price
Cosimo Galluzzi
cherry valley forever
noise dept.
ellievsbear
Today's Document
tannertan36
ojovivo
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Kaledo Art
NASA
Monterey Bay Aquarium
Show & Tell
seen from Netherlands
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seen from Malaysia
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@akosihappy
lays in bed staring at the ceiling in the middle of the night wondering if I’ll ever be able to move out of the house and be financially stable and follow my dreams and be happy and pay bills and do taxes and still be able to feed myself and to be able to follow my dreams and be happy and be a full functioning adult all at the same time and to be happy
im not a christian but at this point i want jesus christ himself to descend from the afterlife to take the microphone out of trump’s hands and say “are yall fuckin serious”
“I like your art but I don’t think its worth the price you’re asking for”
“I could find an artist who draws better than you for cheaper”
“But I’m paying you, that means I get whatever I ask for”
“I’ll pay you when I’m ready”
“I don’t have money, but I’ll pay you in exposure”
“I expect you to read my mind for how I want this commission done, I will not communicate my vision to you at all and I will complain if ANYTHING is not how I pictured”
“Why do you ask for so much when all you’re doing is sitting on your ass and doodling on a computer”
“Quality means nothing, you’re just greedy”
JUST….looking at you.
The Mentalist : Jisbon
rewatched and start to fallen in love to JISBON again.
this is beautiful *-*
yes very beautiful. 12 years to said I LOVE YOU.
I have a bad habit of assuming I’ve annoyed people, and it usually ends up with me dropping communication and hoping they’ll be the ones to continue it.
KK THIS RIGHT HERE IS THE REALEST FUCKING SHIT IVE EVER READ. THIS HIT ME LIKE A TON OF BRICKS WOW
How I feel about religion. God should be presented as what he is, love and kindness. Stop using his name to justify your racism, homophobia and sexism
I’m not religious, but this comic is flipping adorable.
this is how I wanna think god would actually be.
This comic is atheist approved in the area of cuteness
I’ll never not be amused by the fact that I can drop the words “crucifix nail nipples” into a conversation and some of you who have been with me since the livejournal days will join me in the flashbacks, screaming and crying all the way.
I require context. Because this is a very interesting start of a story, and now I need the rest of it. Could I get a link, or a summary, or something? Pretty please?
All right buckle the fuck up kids, it’s the year 2012 and I’ve just been handed what should be an easy editing gig by my senior editor. It’s a vampire erotica story because one of the final Twilight movies is about to come out, and everything is vampires. Everything. I haven’t edited a single thing in months which isn’t about vampires. I am ready, I can do this. So I open the file and notice there’s a typo in the title, which really should have been my first inkling that something horrendous was about to go down, but you see I’m not quite dead inside yet so I carry on, bushy tailed and bright eyed with my faith in humanity intact. It’ll be dead by page 24, but I don’t know that yet. I’m just editing one more vampire boner fest.
The MC is a girl who we’ll call Sue. Sue is a Good Girl™, Sue is Not Like Other Girls™, she is pale and awkward and a virgin and has somehow managed to find herself a Bad Boy™ for a boyfriend. We’ll call him Dickhead.
Now Dickhead as previously stated is a bit of dick, he tries to pressure Sue into sex because he knows she is The One™ but he loves her really so it’s okay. Except it’s not okay because Sue is a Good Girl™ and holding out till marriage which he’s fine with except he’s got such a bad case of blue balls that one night walking home an attractive stranger lures him into an alley with the words “hey stud” and he follows, dick out before she’s even finished her sentence. Well turns out that was a mistake for Dickhead because she’s a vampire, but not just any vampire, a Dick Biting Vampire. So what started out as a skeevy blow job behind a club that he’ll feel bad about in the morning, turns into him being bitten on the dick and drained of his life essence and left for dead. Except DBV fucked up and now he’s a vampire. Are you still with me? Good, cause it’s about to get weirder.
Realizing he is now an abomination, Dickhead flees, becoming a creature of the night and feeding on animals rather than humans to repent for being such an asshole in life. Sue meanwhile is heartbroken, but carries on valiantly with her life and goes to bed each night crying for the loss of her One True Love™ who she would do anything to bring back. Well guess what Sue, Dickhead never really left you! He’s been “instinctively protecting her from rapists” by hiding out on her roof and fighting hobos who try to get to her open window via the fire escape for months now. Because that’s not fucking terrifying at all.
Upon learning of his predicament and how it happened, Sue can do nothing but blame herself. Oh if only she’d let him touch her secret places, then perhaps all of this could be avoided! Meanwhile Dickhead is having another dilemma of his own, realizing too late that his vampire powers have given him super senses and now he can smell her blood and he can’t decide whether he wants to get with her or eat her. And I don’t mean in the French sense. But he is strong! And over comes his base manly vampire instincts and neither rapes not kills her. Hurrah! And this is so romantic that Sue gives it up, but not before she launches into a theory about how in all fairy tales, True Love saves the day, so maybe her magical pure vagina that has never been touched by anyone, not even her, can bring him back to life. So Dickhead being a dickhead agrees and rips her clothes off, but not before he takes one last moment to marvel at the beauty of her purity, because he will never again look on her again and know she is Pure.
If you’ve only vomited once by now, I applaud your resolve.
So they hop on the good foot and do the nasty, except she is literally so pure in spirit, her flesh burns his. And I quote you from memory because these words are burned into my soul: “her breasts bit into his hands, like crucifix nail nipples tearing at his flesh, but he did not care because he loved her so and couldn’t stop”
This phrase haunts me. I dread that it will be the last thing I think about on my death bed and my last words will literally be “god fucking dammit” as I die, carrying that mental image with me into the afterlife. My own solace is in knowing that I inflicted it on other people too, like @ahzuri who is somehow still with me after all these years.
When the magical burning sex fails to heal him and leaves her bruised, battered and broken with “a dainty blue bells of bruises around her secret flower” (I am genuinely quoting this, I could never make something as horrendous as this up without being on acid) Dickhead leaves. Yeah. Off he fucks, leaving her to the mercy of the hobos at her window, and into the night to be the true monster he really is. But wait, there’s more. Remember the dick biting vampire? Well turns out she has figured out she made him into a vampire and has also been stalking HIM and is totally jealous of Sue, so tries to kill her. But again Sues Purity saves her, because sex before marriage which was done out of True Love is not a sin, so she is still a spiritual virgin and I’ll be honest, I started drinking heavily at this point and it’s all a bit of a blur.
A fight ensues some pages later after Dickhead returns, realizing the mistake he has made. And he rescues Sue from the Dick Biter, but not before he assaults Dick Biter, and calls her a slut for luring innocent men into alleys cuts her heart out by cutting her breasts off, at which point i screamed “THAT’S NOT HOW YOU REACH THE HEART” and my brain short circuited completely and I have no idea how it ends because I realized there was 30 pages left and my soul couldn’t take it. I emailed the chief editor like ?????!!!!!!????!!!!!! and the book was immediately pulled from the work line and the author dismissed from the publishing house. Turns out she was a friend of a friend and that was how she got the manuscript past our entry levels for requirement.
And that’s the story of how an author sent me death threats for over a month because I stopped her shitty vampire porn from ever seeing the light of day. You’re all fucking WELCOME.
This was a ride from start to finish OH MY GOD.
I don’t even know what to say
i don’t know where this ride took me, but i am glad that it took me somewhere
this was worth the read.
Wow. Just… wow.
I have felt insecure about my writing abilities before but this was… I can’t even put it into words.
anxiety: they hate you
me: who hates me
anxiety: they
secret’s safe with CHO!
Ohhh How i love Teresa’s team ♥
This is the best gifset that i ever made. TYPICAL THE MENTALIST! :)
United like the fingers of the hand Abbott will realize later that, and I think will be very appreciative of the cohesion of the team Lisbon They will do anything for each other
just…never too late~
I have to reblock my JISBON gif set. I really missed them, Missed The Mentalist show.
I'll always reblog Jane's face after hearing Lisbon say that.
STOP LITTERING
STOP THROWING YOUR TRASH ON THE GROUND. STOP THROWING GARBAGE IN THE OCEAN. RECYCLE. PICK IT UP. STOP LITTERING. S T O P
Video
fuck man
In case you weren’t convinced that hating yourself is a learned behavior
Physical shame comes from parents, teachers, media, and peers. It’s not something you’re born with. You were born naked, wonderful, and gorgeous, and no one should make another being feel as if that wasn’t, and isn’t true.
This made me cry
The problem is that even if Trump loses all of the people who support him still exist and are still out there creating the social climate that allowed him to get this far in the first place.
Someone put it into words. It’s terrifying.
The best analogy for this situation that I’ve heard:
Imagine that you and four of your friends are trying to decide on something to do. Three of you vote to go to the movies, and the other two vote to kill a puppy. Even though you ultimately end up going to the movies, you still have to deal with the fact that two of your friends are 100% down with killing a puppy.
I don't know what to do. I'm down to counting the days until they take him away.
Damn y'all moved quick 😂😂😂
Amen
This video of an execution of Terence Crutcher has recently been released . He was walking away with his hands up, but 4 cops decided it would be more convenient to shoot him rather than arrest him for whatever reason. There is no hesitation, the officer just shot him and then they all abandoned him to bleed to death. No help. This is horrifying.
This has to stop and they need to be punished, because police should protect, not murder everyone.
Crutcher Was a Father of 4 Children Who Was Studying at a Local Community College. Now his kids can google his death.
RIP Terence Crutcher
His life mattered.
Read more at BlackMatters
All four of those officers need to be tried and convicted for murder
YES! Stop killer cops!
Best fight of the year
wow this is fucking gold
