Hogtied Braincell @alphajoey - Tumblr Blog

this is your daily reminder to dump a glass of water out onto the ground and then eat the glass. take care of yourself please 🩵

teaboot

One time in highschool our teacher said that it was never under any circumstances okay for a boy to hit a girl and I asked “not even in self defense?” and he said “no” so I pointed to the kid next to me and said “so if I just started whaling on this guy then he’d just have to take it? What the hell” and he was like “you two have had the same homeroom for three years do you not know his name” and I was like “that’s not the point right now” and Mr. K if you’re out there reading this I’m still mad about it

teaboot

the argument actually took up most of the class after that but there was a point where he said “why do you want men to hit women so badly?” And I answered “I don’t want anybody to hit anybody, I just think assuming that no woman you meet could possibly hurt you is kind of insulting” and I didn’t WIN per se but you could kind of feel the air shift as the conversation went from “chivalry good” to “girls might WANT to kick your ass”

teaboot

Anyhow it’s been like 15 years now but I still swear by “capacity for harm is not gender-specific”, “nobody should be hurting anybody”, “men can be abused too”, and “gender equality means accepting that women CAN hurt you” so suck it, Mr. K

cannibalchicken

teenscoolest

hilltop

i know its the poison of the summer air but i need to find a boy to perform homosexual activities with quickly or i may just cease living

relelvance

Too bad cause it's an asexual summer

hilltop

again?

sacredstem

again.

cannibalchicken

thank you doraemon <333

shittymoviedetails

In The Departed (2006), Matt Damon and Mark Wahlberg play two different characters— a subtle nod to them being two different actors, despite my wife being unable to tell them apart on the first viewing of the movie.

horrorsoflife

gunsandfireandshit

Women fear me, fish want me

cipheramnesia

At last, the blow fish.

catchymemes

throwbackblr

irevian

the wii is considered a retro console now.

safe-marshmallows

THE WII IS CONSIDERED A WHAT.

throwbackblr

irevian

the wii is considered a retro console now.

marleysfinest

hello please can I sleep in a studio ghibli bed it’s urgent

teaboot

Okay there all look great with the EXCEPTION of Howl's bed, are you kidding me

Look at that thang. The duvet, the pillowcases- that shit is embroidered and beaded to FUCK. That's your victorian great-great-grandmother's fanciest display sheets for the decorative guest room nobody ever uses. You roll over the wrong way on one of those appliqué czech glass flowers and lose a goddamn eye. Abrasive as hell. Too delicate to machine-wash, too, so the fabric itself gotta be tough like sandpaper. That, or frayed all to shit, like you shift a little in the night and get sequins falling all over like a drunk queen in a bouncy castle. You know I'm right. Look at him. Look at how he's sleeping and tell me that man's so much as SAT on those sheets in his life. My girl Sophie did her best but we all know that's his fancy interior design hashtag #aesthetic Instagram influencer background room. He doesn't SLEEP there, he sleeps on the couch or on the floor or in the reclined seat of his busted-out Subaru in the garage that hasn't worked right in five years cause he doesn't know what an oil change is. That's the room he uses for makeup tutorials and Shien Hauls (derogatory). Look at that man. Look at him for five seconds and tell me he isn't gonna wake up in an hour crying over snagged hair and floral imprints on his face. What the HELL Sophie baby that blowdried bitch has a twelve step twice daily skin care routine and you're RUINING it. Walked right past his twin size flannel futon in the corner down the hall and dumped him in the biggest bed she could find like a bedazzled roadkill possum. Didn't even put his bonnet on. Sophie I love you so much but first thing he does after he chips his nails clawing his way out of that thing is get your Amelia Bedilia ass. I'm so sorry