So Much For My Promising Career in Espionage

wasting my life on this site

[rustingbridges]

I like to fuck around and waste time for at least ~6-10 hours per day, and let me tell you, that really puts some pressure on your schedule. you have no idea how busy I am

[paperbodiesamongthestars]

I love Scott Hunter so much. He’s the most beautiful man in the world. He runs like he’s used to having way more than four limbs. His flirting game is actively terrifying. He has big sad eyes and perfect stubble. He’s so tired. He murdered Canadian golden boy Shane Hollander on live television. He met Kip 2.5 times, took him back to his fancy-ass New York apartment, declared his love, and asked him to move in. He’s a goal-driven perfectionist, which means he’s probably awesome at sex. His tiny smile when he realized Kip was still in his apartment is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. He looks amazing in his teensy boxer briefs. He’s so sad and he’s wayyyy too much, just, as a person. He’s so scared. He’s the most awkward potato I’ve ever seen in my life. He’s been so alone for so long. He’s SO scared. He wants his life to be different so badly, but he still feels like he has to hide his stupid blueberry banana socks.

Anyway, apparently there are people who didn’t like Heated Rivalry season 1, episode 3, but I simply cannot relate. Sorry you hate fun, I guess.

[sarcosmiiic]

what even happened to plastic girl and crow boy. we forgot about them so fast. just another example of the savage nature of hollywood

[lakemojave]

Even our youth fictional romances are cheap, artificial, and disposable these days, much like a certain clothing material that comes to mind.

[nightwashh]

first of all jack zimmermann is the original depressed bisexual hockey player. so jot that down ilya rozanov

[loveliesttime]

my friends r sending me heated rivalry clips of a player kissing his bf (?) on national tv after winning the cup and all i can think of was wow that also happened to my close personal friends jack and bitty

[mallahanmoxie]

What is this if not the ending? See me off with grace, and let it go Who are you now that you're all alone?

Ngozi Ukazu, Check Please! + Lizzy McAlpine, Force of Nature

[sizzlingsandwichperfection-blog]

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

it's not that I'm against the 'Paul is Poseidon' theory there's merit to it HOWEVER him being a normal human guy is also funny bc it means that upon finding out his fiancée's baby daddy is the god of the sea, his immediate next move was taking that sea baby out on a boat and teaching him the trick to killing crabs. Paul walked into that man's home with that man's son and killed that man's pets. he made a power move against the ocean and lived. deeply funny behavior.

[perccyjackson]

PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIANS | 2x05: We Check In to C.C.’s Spa & Resort

[vvitchgender]

I think it’s incredibly fucked how capitalism discourages learning for learning’s sake. People will have interests they’ve spent years researching then say it’s “useless knowledge” bc it didn’t go towards a college degree and isn’t part of their job. Learning is never useless! Your brain is growing and developing throughout your whole life! People would never have epiphanies or sudden lightening strikes of creativity if they weren’t learning new things! That goes double for topics like science, politics, and history, which inform your understanding of the world you live in!

[batsandboba]

(opening the author’s works page after finishing a fic) and if im lucky they’ll have written this exact same fic but different a bunch more times

[batsandboba]

and if im unlucky, Hockey RPF (37)

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

I mean obviously I would fuck a monster but more than that I would bond emotionally with a monster over our shared sense of alienation and rejection from a hostile universe. together we would explore our deep-seated fear of being inherently unlovable, and reassure each other of our innate value as sentient beings deserving of love and kindness. i will hold them gently, and wipe the tears from their googly eyestalk-tentacles, and something will begin to heal

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

and then we fuck nasty, im not a saint

[tossawary]

I don't think it truly hit me when I first read "Check, Please!" (many years ago now) that Jack's mom is an actress/model and Jack's dad was a superstar hockey player in the 70s, 80s, and 90s(?). Now, looking at that, I'm like, "Oh, they could have totally been doing coke off of each other's naked bodies or something in their youth. Easy."

Do I think they are/were addicts? Don't know. Do I think that they brought any of that party around young Jack? Don't know that either. Hopefully not. But those industries can be very sleazy, very toxic, very abusive, and all of the Zimmermanns probably had the opportunity to participate in some fairly dangerous forms of "glamorous" "fun". One or both of the parents could have flirted with drugs. It's one possible interpretation.

And I like the potential angst of Alicia and Bob kind of brushing that wild past off as "just what some people do when you're young and stupid and beautiful and rich", of them being settled and confident and comparatively "boring" adults now in these celebrity environments that have generally treated them very well, and this contributing to them not fully realizing just how much pressure this professional sports world that eats people alive is putting on their kid. It's just the exciting hockey juniors culture for Jack and Kent to participate in all of the underage drinking and stupid bets! Bad Bob Zimmermann can be the cool dad who looks the other way.

Until Jack overdoses on anxiety meds. And Bob is sitting in a hospital waiting room while the entire hockey world speculates about his teenage son's obvious recreational drug habits because "record and rumor has it that Bad Bob liked to party pretty hard back in the day". And it's the worst day of his life.

Also, I like the potential humor of the main characters worrying about impressing Jack's elegant and classy parents, while Alicia and Bob are 99% sure that their beloved hockey robot child was conceived on a private jet while they were VERY drunk. Bitty is worried that Jack's parents will think he's some unsophiscated southern hick who does keg stands at frat parties every weekend or something, goodness gracious, until Jack reveals that there exist photos of his father naked on his knees drinking beer from the Stanley Cup, and that those photos used to be framed in the upstairs bathroom of his childhood home.

Bitty: "...Good Lord, you weren't surprised at all to meet someone like Shitty, were you?"

Jack: "The social justice stuff was new."

[luntfontanne]

been thinking about this little guy for like three days straight. this is it this is the energy this is how i'm going to be this year. we're gonna do it lads trust and believe

[bittles-pie]

CHECK PLEASE 5th YEAR BEING PUBLISHED HOW WE DOING OMGCP FANDOM

[meggettes]

[catgirltoes]

And is the "bus in zero minutes" at the stop with us right now?