Dellie_kindness83

[rosalie-stan]

animal blood really must be dumb bitch juice huh

[milknjuice-deactivated20190908]

i’m trying a new thing called activities

[milknjuice-deactivated20190908]

“activities” is where you do different things like play an instrument or plant a garden

[flashfuneral]

tell me more

[milknjuice-deactivated20190908]

i’ve said too much already

[intriga-hounds]

MEH!!!

[gentlealien]

the Gentle Alien is unsure of how these peace talks are going

[gobblechopstv]

[bethboxin]

Ron just got his howler from his mom yelling at him for stealing the car. He seems super embarrassed and most of the Great Hall is laughing. But here’s the thing:

Ron is 12 years old.

Ron stole a car.

Ron fucking stole a fucking car at the age of TWELVE.

I would not be laughing at him. Ronald Weasley is a fucking bad ass. When was the last time you jacked a car Malfoy? That’s what I thought. Bitch.

[dinosaurrainbowstarfish]

Harry woke up at 3 am, wrote this, and went back to sleep.

[paulyappleseed-deactivated20161]

[bighonkinqueeniesbadbadbackstory]

Why tiptoe into hell when you can backflip into a cannonball. I like Mackenzie’s style.

[whitepeopletwitter]

[pukicho]

You flirt and kiss and for what??? Sex?????! Love?????? Pathetic.

[aphuckingbeesechurger]

To level my charisma stat

[pukicho]

Ah a gamer, you may pass

[fanonical]

breaking news: harry potter has quit his job as an auror!

stating that ‘i have no idea why i thought that was a good idea, holy shit’, potter has since relocated to diagon alley and reopened florean fortescue’s ice cream parlour. in a comment, potter said ‘yeah. yeah, this seems more like it’ and added ‘i mean, he gave me ice cream that one time. loved that guy.’

[bisexualshakespeare]

All Pottermore stories and other HP related extra-canon are hereby replaced with this text post

[platypusinplaid]

this is THE funniest punchline I’ve ever seen

[isadora-greenhall]

american person: *writes date*

me: but there is no 15th month

[artwhork]

ur gonna die anyway so get that fucking tattoo ur parents and friends hate and eat whatever u want

[little-king-john-deactivated202]

“You’re gonna die anyway, so just set your house on fire and drink snake venom.” This is like the worst life philosophy and you can use it to justify anything.

[hullaballoons]

ok like not to rain on ur parade but getting a tattoo and eating some fries are very different than setting ur house on fire and drinking venom like I see where ur coming from but we were only going like 25 mph u didn’t need to accelerate it to 120 in a second lmao

[stardust-meatsuit]

“Life ends too quickly so don’t waste it denying yourself the stuff you like just because you’re worried about what other people will think about how you look”

“You want me to just fucking kill myself, op? Is that it?”

[brainstatic]

Y'all think being in a goth relationship means wearing white makeup together but Mary Shelley lost her virginity on her mother’s grave so maybe step it up.

[bandydear]

Mary Shelley carried her husband’s heart around and lived in a crypt after he died. No one will ever be as goth as Mary Shelley.

[drearyhours]

scene before movie climax:

protagonist: So who’s with me?

*5 seconds of silence*

the stoic one: *looks up* im in

4 people one after the other: me to

*after everyone else has joined we see The Edgy One standing in the back*

*2 more seconds of silence*

The Edgy One: *chortles* we’re all gonna die… what the hell, im in

[savaagecaabaage-deactivated2021]

I wonder what Hermione did the whole train ride to Hogwarts while Harry and Ron had the flying car

[bexhibitionist]

Probably had the only peace and quiet she’ll ever have for the rest of her life.

[mockiato-deactivated20200315]

I need straight women to realize that they are 100% just as straight as straight men are, and that their opinions on homosexuality–including what it means to be a lesbian–are just as meaningless and inappropriate as straight men’s opinions are.

[the--bitch--blog]

Are you saying every straight opinion on homosexuality is meaningless?

[crypti-d-iscourse]

Actually all straight opinions are meaningless :/

[kim-jong-chill]

i need feminism because when jesus does a magic trick it’s a goddamn miracle but when a woman does a magic trick she gets burned at the stake

[mattheuphonium-blog]

fabulous 

[tockthewatchdog-deactivated2020]

i mean they did also kill jesus. that was a pretty significant thing that happened. like i understand where you’re coming from here but they very much did kill jesus.