Rabastan had leapt before he thought, a rare circumstance, but one that always seemed to carry innumerable consequences.
Still, the kiss was everything he could have imagined and more. Overwhelming and sloppy, tongues and teeth met as lips parted, each of them trying to find the right rhythm, it all so new and strange. Each moment brought about new obstacles, noses bumping, too much pressure, not enough, instances of teeth catching on lips. There was a new kind of warmth that bloomed within him, one that wasn’t from the heat of the water, that felt as though it had claws and a hunger all it’s own. Devouring his lips, he wanted more, feeling light and heady, unable to stop himself from smiling even as they kissed.
His body tingled as his skin heated, each stream of water that slipped down along their skin carving a cooling path. Time seemed to slip away from him, nothing mattering more than the curve of Adrian’s lips against his own, the desire that piqued as his tongue slid against his, the press of their bodies as they came together and —
There they were. Wet, naked, hands covering their groins with an edge of embarrassment between them as thick as knives. Adrian’s face was the color of pink carnations. It was never like this, and yet it was now.
Chest heaving, he looked beyond Rabastan because he could not look at Rabastan. His thoughts were spinning a million miles a minute. Had he done wrong? Had he done right? Had he messed up? What did it mean that he found enjoyment in their shared space with nude bodies pressed together?
Did it mean anything?
It was Rabastan that broke the silence between them. Softly spoken and barely heard he offered a way out but Adrian found himself shaking his head so instantly he had not realized he’d even done so. Was he so desperate to continue what they had been doing that he did not even have to think twice? Maybe he should think twice. This was his best friend.
“Yeah,” he replied. “Yeah, I’m alright.” He paused, taking a breath, allowing his gaze to dart again towards his friend’s. “Are you?” Adrian added. They’d gotten carried away. That was all. The moment had come on quickly, initiated by Adrian, and it had gone quickly to his head.
As his heart rate leveled, Adrian was able to release a soft laugh. One hand rose to shield his brow. “Gods.” He looked at Rabastan with a sheepish grin. “Didn’t expect to get hard so fast.” And for a moment he was still, standing there beneath the pressure of hot water, looking at his best friend with new eyes. It was impossible not to overthink when Rabastan was right there in front of him, beneath the light in the shower. It was impossible to ignore the fact that he was all man with sharp angles and a sooth, flat chest. He inhaled a long breath through parted lips.
“We are naked,” he blurted stupidly before he snorted. “I’m an idiot.”
The point? Arthur supposed some people wanted to get drunk enough to forget this night or maybe tipsy enough to not feel nervous surrounded by others, but the few times Arthur had been inebriated he ended up in embarrassing predicaments he wished never happened. That was definitely not a good idea for tonight.
“Maybe… but Alcohol and I don’t really mix well. Bit of a love-hate relationship, emphasis on the hate…” Arthur tosses his drink in a nearby rubbage bin. The spiked punch was definitely be enjoyed by many though, some not even legal to be consuming the stuff.
“I assume you have a better relationship with the stuff since you aren’t pouring yours down the nearest drain?”
“I would hardly call a drink in my hand a relationship,” Adrian replied, cocking a single brow. That was a rather dramatic term to call a cocktail. “But yeah, sure. Guess me and spiked punch have moved onto second base, the way I’m handling her.”
Without averting his eyes from the ginger, he took a slow sip from the punch. Whoever had spiked it put way too much liquor inside, assuring it would be noticed quickly and fixed. The key was to be more subtle, so even those that didn’t drink would get drunk. Still, he’d down the whole thing and try for a second. Anything to get through this night.
“You have a bad night with drinking or something?”
Time felt as though it was stretching out before him, each second an eternity that he couldn’t fathom. One single word answered his question, hanging in the limited space between their bodies. He’d known, of course, that Adrian hadn’t come for the soap, but hearing even his simple answer left him with chills that trembled down along his spine.
Warmth curled deep in his gut, but he wasn’t sure how to act, what to do next, his instincts clawing at his insides, egging him on, daring him to move forwards. He wasn’t sure what would happen if he closed the space, if he allowed their bodies to meet beneath the water and the steam, resisting despite the yearning that felt like a wound pulsing viciously inside of him.
They were both exposed, distinctly unfurled before one another, the desire to take in everything that was offered prickling each nerve ending.
All at once, he felt Adrian’s hands against his hips, the warm weight of them causing his breath to expel in a single whoosh while they traded spots, his skin chilled by the loss of the heated water at his back. As they moved, he swallowed roughly, feeling their lower bodies touch, though he couldn’t place exactly what had happened without looking. He refused though, knowing that if he did, any semblance of control he’d gathered would disintegrate, dissolving like soap suds as they circled the drain.
The question that came was simple. One that had been asked a multitude of times by now, but he felt choked by it; a sharp wave of desire rising in him and clinging to every cell. He wanted it, but he didn’t know how to ask for it, his voice lost as he stared into the warm russet of Adrian’s eyes.
Attempting to clear his throat of the thickness that overcame it, he felt his body tip towards his friend’s, his head dipping in a single nod.
“Yes,” Rabastan managed to whisper, his gaze mesmerized by the sight of the water as it spilled over the other’s shoulders, making trails down along his chest, leaving glistening droplets in it’s wake.
He didn’t wait, couldn’t wait, his lips catching Adrian’s as his body nearly crashed into his, his hands catching on his arms for balance. Parting his lips he drank him in, every fiber of his being feeling as though it was crackling, burning him away into ash. He’d needed this, wanted this, more than he’d realized; to the point where he was nearly certain he would never crave something so badly again.
There was a rushing in Adrian’s ears.
Under the steady stream of water trickling against his back, he might as well have been a million miles from anyone. There was nothing but steam and Rabastan’s eyes. The quiet stretched between them and he found that he’d lost track of time. There were a hundred questions here followed by a thousand answers and yet neither spoke a word. A part of him was acutely aware that beyond these echoey walls existed others, others that could come in, could figure out what they were doing here, others that might ruin everything. Even so, his feet- his heart- would not allow him to move. Adrian was as still as possible with just the beating of his heart that somehow had found its way to drum against his ears to remind him that he was alive.
There was a soft response, barely heard, and utterly not comprehended, and then lips were on his. Adrian heaved a breath in the brief space when they parted and adjusted, but it was fleeting as Rabastan’s strength had him pinned. He had not anticipated a response with such vigor and ferocity, but Adrian could not say he didn’t like it. His mouth opened, their teeth and lips clashed, and they were kissing. Deeply, sloppily, passionately, they were kissing.
Still, Adrian was inexperienced. Their noses bumped as he adjusted and he pulled away for a moment, giggling and flushed pink. Warm water trickled between his lips, into his mouth, but he surged forward again to capture Rabastan in another kiss. Blood rushed through his body from his spine up to the back of his head, making him dizzy and tingly. There was a moment, between the ravenous kissing, that Adrian was aware that their bodies were touching.
Stomachs pressed together, chests, thighs bumped, and their cocks--
--They were definitely touching now. The sudden awareness had him struggling to breathe and Adrian pulled back entirely. He glanced away, face flushed, lips parted, his hands coming up between his legs to shield himself.
He was standing in the stone fireplace of what looked like a large, dimly lit wizard’s shop – but nothing in here was ever likely to be on a Hogwarts school list. A glass case nearby held a withered hand on a cushion, a blood-stained pack of cards and a staring glass eye. Evil-looking masks leered down from the walls, an assortment of human bones lay upon the counter and rusty, spiked instruments hung from the ceiling.
He was met with silence and Rabastan had to wonder if perhaps Adrian had thought twice and decided to exit the bathroom instead. He couldn’t blame him, if that was the case, the sound of the water splashing against the tile floor the only sound he could hear. Pushing his fingers through his wet strands, he heard his friend speak a single word, the sound echoing in the tight cavity of the bathroom.
Before he could respond however, the sound of metal scratching on metal hit his ears, cold air rushing in to meet him, forcing a chill to run through his wet body. Water dripped down his spine and over his chest in trails, his head turning in surprise to see his best friend before him, a towel looped around his waist. He could feel his eyes on him, the way they burned his skin with their intensity, his breath caught in his chest as he observed him.
Droplets of water clung to Adrian’s hair, to his face and skin, accenting his muscles with each movement, the light bouncing off, causing them to gleam. His throat felt thick as he tried to swallow, his mind going blank as his eyes met the other’s, searching for something he couldn’t put his finger on. The humid air felt heavy around them as Adrian dropped the towel, the sound of it crumpling at his feet causing tingles to race throughout his body, to shiver through all his nerves.
He slid into the stall with him, his body pressed in tight against his own, Rabastan suddenly finding it difficult to breathe. He was a sight to behold beneath the warm light of the stall, water spilling over them both in rivulets. His mouth felt dry despite the humidity, his friend’s sudden confidence throwing him off balance.
“Hey,” he responded breathily once he managed to find his voice, his gaze intent on Adrian’s hazel eyes, lest they descend further down his body. Hesitantly, he lifted a hand, sliding his fingers along the slick skin of his friend’s shoulder, allowing them to come to rest against his pectoral. There was a vulnerability to their situation that he couldn’t quiet fathom; a desire that hummed beneath the surface of every action, causing his stomach to knot in a pleasant way.
“Run out of soap?” He whispered, his tone light as he stepped closer, closing in the minimal space between them. He didn’t know what this was supposed to be, what he was even doing, but he’d be dammed if it didn’t feel good. They’d already promised themselves to one another, he couldn’t think of a reason to hide.
Furrowing his brows, he lifted his hand, his thumb brushing against Adrian’s lower lip and along his chin, his brain a fuzz on incomplete thoughts. He’d wanted this, he realized. Some part of him wanted him.
He had taken Rabastan by surprise. His sudden appearance caught his best friend off guard.
Good.
There was a tightness in his own throat as their bodies unintentionally touched; slick skin against slick skin slippery until he was fully in the stall before the other. There was a long moment of quiet as their eyes locked in something wicked before Adrian reached blindly for a fistful of shower curtain to tug shut. The metal rings screeched against the metal rod holding the curtain up and then it was quiet. Water pounded against Rabastan’s solid back and dripped over his perfect, muscular shoulders and then down rippling abs. Since he’d gotten in, Adrian didn’t dare take his eyes off his friend’s face, afraid where they might travel if allowed freedom.
Rabastan’s softly-spoken greeting was all it took for a soft smile to appear. Then touch. As soft as a breath, tentative fingers brushed over his shoulder, slick and wet and warm and Adrian shivered just so.
“No,” he replied simply. He had not run out of soap and he knew that Rabastan was well aware of that. There were a million reasons he could be in here, like this, none of which had to do with soap. Adrian cocked a single, teasing brow as though daring him to ask why he was here.
Then, more touch. Adrian stood statue-still as Rabastan’s thumb teased his lower lip, but he did not look away. He just wanted to be here, stay here. With him. With Rabastan. He did not know what to do now, his inexperience leaving his fingers twitching by his sides. It was for a long moment that he was still and silent and keeping his eyes on his best friend. There was a warmness, here, an openness he could not quite comprehend. The water continued pour against Rabastan’s backside, creating steam around them, and despite the heat that hugged him and had begun curling inside of him, Adrian shivered again.
At once, he placed two hands on either side of Rabastan’s waist and shifted to switch spots with him. The movement had their bodies brushing and though he could not be sure which part of Rabastan had touched him, just there, he swallowed back the bubbling warmness in his gut. Now, Adrian was beneath the water.
Arthur Weasley wasn’t one for fancy attire or black tie affairs. In fact, if it hadn’t been for Molly asking him to come he would’ve stated far away from the Gala. He wasn’t even sure how welcome he’d be after his mother was essentially erased from the Black family for marrying his mother. But that didn’t make him any less ‘pureblood’. A word he wasn’t too fond of honestly, not liking how it set him apart from others due to no reason of his own.
He tugged at his suit jacket, fiddling with his bowtie as he entered the party. The room was filled with people he knew from school and around the wizarding world, but he couldn’t help feeling as if he stuck out like a sore thumb.
Taking a deep breath, Arthur stood up tall, determined not to look as out of place as he felt. He didn’t see any completely friendly faces right away, so he made a beeline for the refreshments table, letting food and drink occupy his time for the moment.
“Shite… Has someone already managed to spike this?” His face grimaced as he took a small swig of the supposed ‘punch.
Originally posted by the-imagines-awaken
Adrian had not wanted to be here.
The delay in his trip North with Rabastan secured his friend a spot of family obligations that had Adrian deciding to tag along. Whether or not it pleased his parents (it did) was no matter to him. They were horrible people and he liked to believe he hated them (he didn’t). Soon, he would be on his way, escaping somewhere far from here, but until then he would enjoy the free food and drink and show his face so that no one could speak ill of him otherwise.
Rabastan was off, talking to people who mattered in some way, and Adrian found himself hiding against a wall with a drink in hand. Eyes lingered across the hall on his own mother, who he had exchanged brief words with earlier but who he had since avoided. He had not noticed a rather disgruntled looking bloke nearby until he spoke and Adrian realized, belatedly, there was no one except him within earshot. He quirked a brow and glanced into his own drink.
“Alright, as long as you’re sure,” Rabastan replied, his gaze focused on his best friend, wanting nothing more than to make sure he was comfortable. He didn’t want to take advantage of the situation or cause any kind of discomfort, but thus far, they’d seemed to be making whatever this was between them work. Maybe he didn’t need to worry so much, especially when it came to Adrian.
The movement has come naturally to him, removing his shirt without a single care, but as Adrian’s eyes slipped along his chest and stomach, he suddenly felt exposed. It was as though distance memories echoed within his mind, reminding him that everything had changed now. They had kissed, they had promised one another their bodies, and he couldn’t help the warm flush as it crept it’s way across his skin. Blood rushed in his ears, the roar of it all that he could hear for a few seconds as his heart began to race, his mouth going unbelievably dry.
Adrian wanted him. He wanted him in a way that he’d never quite fathomed anyone wanting him before, and the kicker was that he wanted him in return. Feeling unbalanced by this simple revelation, he parted his lips to say something to break the tension, but every thought, every word seemed to vanish from his mind the second his friend removed his shirt, his eyes fixing on the flex of his muscles, the stretch of his shoulder blades as he pulled it off. The moment was nothing more than a flash though, a few mind numbing seconds before his friend disappeared behind the curtain.
Releasing a slow breath, he tried to pull himself together, to come back into himself, removing his shoes and socks, along with the rest of his clothes before hopping into his own stall, turning on the water. The deluge of heat felt good against his tired muscles and sweat covered skin, and he closed his eyes, standing under the stream until his mind cleared.
He didn’t want to get out, didn’t want to face the world that he’d left behind when he’d stepped into the cavity of the stall, but it was Adrian’s voice that pulled him back, forcing him to face reality. He couldn’t think of a reason not to allow his best friend to enter, and he wondered vaguely what he was thinking, his mind questioning everything that was happening.
“Yeah, come on through,” he called out, rinsing the soap from his hair to finish up what he was doing. “I’ll be out in a second. How was your shower?” Rabastan asked in a teasing voice, one that he rarely used for anyone outside of his inner circle.
It was as though Rabastan did not quite grasp what it was he asked. His voice remained neutral, his tone the same as it always was, and Adrian lingered there, holding the first curtain open as he stared into the empty stall. Rabastan’s dirty clothes sat in a pile on a small bench, his robes hanging up on a hook, and a fresh set of clothes sat, folded on a stool. Tucked beneath were his shoes and draped over the top of the stall was a small, white towel. With a soft exhale he took a step forward and closed the curtain behind him.
Rabastan was safely behind the curtain rinsing off, and all at once he was aware that his friend assumed he was asking to come into the stall, and not the shower. Adrian rolled his eyes and smirked to himself.
Whatever.
They’d be having sex within a couple of weeks if their plan panned out and it wasn’t like he hadn’t seen Rabastan’s half-naked body before. The only difference, now, was that he was fully naked beneath hot water and there was this bizarre, all consuming attraction that he had felt for his best friend. It was weird, truly, and it made him question himself more than he would have liked to admit. Maybe it was best not to think. They were going through with all of this soon enough, and he had to get accustomed to the idea.
“Alright,” he said belatedly before he tugged back the curtain all at once. Rabastan stood beneath the water. Suds trickled down his perfect body, carving a path through his muscles. He was glistening and wet and Adrian had to force his eyes not to trail any lower. As their eyes met, Adrian quirked a single brow, allowed his towel to drop to the floor by his feet, and stepped forward into the warmth.
The stalls were small to begin with, but with two of them occupying the same space, it was impossible not to bump and touch with every movement. He slid against him and pulled the curtain closed shut again.
“Hey there,” he whispered, his voice low and smooth and full of a confidence that had lacked when they were outside, exposed in the cusp of the frigid forest.
“If it matters to you then it matters obviously.” Dahlia spoke softly, tilting her head curiously at Adrian. He was different, definitely not the sort she was used to chatting with. Probably the silent type, which was horrible when around Dahlia Wood.
“Do you have siblings that go here too? Do you know my brother Silas?” She starts to small talk ignoring his likely silent plea for her to take her leave. Blinking her eyes at him she tries to gauge his temperament, but he’s mostly unreadable. Even she felt like she was talking too much.
“Nice to meet you Adrian, well not inside here under these.. weird circumstances. Are you normally this talkative?”
“No and no,” Adrian replied quickly. The curse of being an only child meant he was stuck as the one that inherited all of the responsibilities and expectations placed upon him by his parents. The blessing was that he did not have to deal with the baggage that came along with a sibling whose choices could not be controlled. Time and time again he saw siblings clash. Rabastan was one exception, but Adrian was not so sure he would have been quite as lucky. As for Silas, he had never heard the name and did not particularly care to know who he might be.
Adrian squinted. She was a bizarre girl and it was a surprise he had hardly noticed her before. Perhaps he needed to learn how to be more perceptive of his surroundings. It would do him no good to remain unaware of everything around him, especially if things were becoming as grim as rumored.
“Oh yeah. Chatter box, I am,” he replied sarcastically, cocking both brows in her direction. “Do you want me to talk?” What did people talk about when they did not know one another? That was a question he often wondered and never found answers to.
Rabastan could hear the change in Adrian’s tone as he defended his reasoning for asking permission. He hadn’t meant to upset him, or to even question him, he’d only wanted him to know that it was alright that he follow through with what he wanted. However, he could see his friend’s point and was actually touched by the fact that he never wanted to take advantage. “I don’t mind you asking. Ask as much as you want. I just don’t want you to beat yourself up because you forgot to,” he said quietly, pursing his lips. “Do you want me to ask you permission too? I don’t want to put you in an uncomfortable position.”
He did his best not to react to Adrian’s words as he spoke low to him, acknowledging things that he didn’t want to think about right now. He knew liking what he was doing with his friend was wrong, that it was probably going to backfire in some way. He wasn’t stupid, if anything, he was usually overly cautious. There was something about his connection with his friend that felt good though, the kind of good that he couldn’t seem to shake no matter how hard he tried. Normally, he was good at dismissing these kinds of feelings and thoughts, a seasoned professional at clamping down on his emotions, but for some reason he couldn’t with Adrian. Perhaps it was because he was so used to being honest with him, that it felt impossible to ignore what this was doing to him.
“I know, I feel the same,” he replied, his voice low, closing his eyes as he tried to gather his thoughts, slowly opening them to focus on what he was doing. “We’re in control of it though,” he said, not sure who he was trying to convince — Adrian or himself. “We’re making our own choices for once. Maybe that is part of what makes it feel so good.”
Grateful to be back on the ground, despite his love of flying, Rabastan made his way towards the castle, walking through it with Adrian at his side. He just wanted to be alone with him, to be able to talk things through and to feel the connection they shared, regardless of all the rest. They were best friends. It wasn’t strange that he should crave that, he’d been feeling it ever since they’d gotten to know one another as kids.
What was new though, was the instant desire to press his lips against his friend’s the moment the door to the bathroom was closed and locked, his fingers curling around his own change of clothes that he’d brought into the bathroom. He didn’t know what he was doing, wasn’t sure why desire had gripped his gut with cold fingers, but part of him was tired of ignoring what he felt.
“Looks like we timed things perfectly to get the bathroom to ourselves,” he commented, reaching up behind himself to pull off his shirt, allowing it to drop to the floor, trying to ignore the sudden nerves that fluttered through his chest.
“No,” Adrian replied instantly, feeling oddly defensive. He did not need Rabastan to ask, especially if it was not something he wanted to do or thought to do. It was just something that made him feel better and so he would continue to ask him before just taking what was not his to take. Adrian wasn’t sure if he was making sense, wasn’t sure why he was feeling this way. “You don’t have to ask.”
It struck him suddenly, as Rabastan tugged off his shirt without care, how alone they were. The bathroom was dead silent with only the echoing sound of dripping water to keep them company. Adrian watched in silence as his friend’s shirt fell from his hand and onto the ground beside his stall. For a moment, he stared at the crumbled cotton before his eyes shifted. They looked to Rabastan now, to the vast expanse of muscles covering his stomach and his chest. The outline of his abs dipped low, creating a V-shape that was partially hidden by his trousers. Looking at him, like this, after all that had transpired between them coupled with a firm agreement to have sex made his stomach twist and his heart palpitate.
Adrian was looking at him with lover’s eyes and it took him too long to realize this. The time passed quickly, but it had passed, leaving him feeling warm and tingly as he licked his lower lip and exhaled a shaky breath. Nothing was going to happen in here, not now when there was a distinct possibility that someone might enter despite attempts at masking themselves in privacy. Adrian finally pulled his gaze away to kick off his boots, setting them just outside the curtain of one of the stalls. He reached down and tugged off each sock in turn, shoving them inside of his boots, and then moved to pull his shirt off.
“Okay, well,” Adrian murmured, but said no more as he disappeared into the stall, tugging the curtain shut as he stripped bare. He turned on the water, allowing it to warm until steam hugged his body, and then stepped in. After the brisk cold of the outdoors, it was a welcome feeling as piping hot water dripped over his body.
Adrian washed himself down quickly and turned off the water quietly. He listened, hearing the sound of Rabastan’s shower in the stall beside him. For a moment, he allowed himself to linger there, listening to the sound of his friend’s shower spitting hot water onto his body. Slowly, Adrian stepped out, grabbed a towel, and glanced around the bathroom. It appeared no one else had tried to join them.
Slowly, Adrian peeled back the curtain of Rabastan’s changing area to speak to him through a second curtain that blocked the view of his friend in the shower.
It was hard for Rabastan to keep his mind focused on flight when all he wanted to do was turn around and capture Adrian’s lips with his own. Each touch, each kiss, reminding him of the night before and how good it felt to have someone look at him that way and make him feel as though he mattered. There was a connection with his best friend that he didn’t understand, didn’t know what to make of, but he wanted it — more than he could remember wanting anything.
“You don’t have to apologize,” he murmured in a low voice, not wanting Adrian to feel as though he did something wrong when everything he did felt so right. “You don’t have to ask when it comes to me. I think it’s fair to say at this point, I don’t mind your touch. In fact, I rather like it,” he admitted, trying not to feel guilty about the fact that he did. For so long, he’d been trained by his family to expect certain things out of his life, and this was certainly not one of them.
The air around them felt like ice, the air cold enough to allow for snow, but he ignored it, focusing on the flight and the way Adrian felt pressed tightly against his back. He didn’t want to admit it, but he liked the sensation of being held, enjoyed having him there against him, his stomach twisting at the fact that his friend wanted to move further with him.
He wanted to do more with him too, but he felt like he was struggling to understand the desire and the need that flooded through his veins now that he’d had a taste of what intimacy with one another could be like.
As he lowered the broom down into the courtyard, he paused, glancing over his shoulder at Adrian’s admittance. There was a tingling that blossomed from his stomach all throughout his body, a warmth that he had rarely experienced before, each breath feeling tight in his chest. He’d been joking — teasing, really — yet it had turned serious in the most intense way.
“You’re not going to lose me, so you don’t have anything to fear there,” Rabastan whispered, getting off the broom and turning to face his friend. “Though, I know what you mean. That’s one of my biggest fears too.” Taking in a breath, he shook his head, trying to push back the rise in emotions, to hold back the desire to lean in and kiss him despite the fact that they were in the middle of the courtyard now. “Let’s go.”
“I do,” Adrian replied quietly. “I want to ask. I want to be sure and I want you to be sure. I never fucking want to take something from you that is yours to give.” There was a slight defensiveness to his tone. There was a good reason Adrian needed permission before touching his friend, before kissing his friend, but he didn’t even understand why he did it himself. Though they both clearly found enjoyment in one another, he never wanted to assume. “I like it, too. A lot. So, I guess we’re in luck.”
Maybe it was wrong. Maybe he should not feel this way about Rabastan, especially because they’d been friends for so long. Despite his ability to ignore Rabastan’s gender up until this point, he remained aware that they were both boys and that this was not what was expected of them. Frankly, he did not care to follow his parent’s beliefs and their rules, but it did not stop him from feeling disgusted by himself if he thought about it too much. It was unnatural, and though it was just an experiment, he could not deny that he liked it.
“Maybe it’s wrong, Rabbit,” he whispered, wondering if his voice would blow away with the wind. Adrian wanted to be able to talk about his concerns with the one person that he could talk about this with. “I mean-- I fucking know it’s wrong, actually. But part of me doesn’t give a shit.”
Adrian chewed down on his lower lip as he watched Rabastan. He was glad to be back on the ground, but it felt like the Earth had been tugged out from beneath him just the same. Rabastan admitted to feeling the same and there was something there, in his eyes, that told Adrian how seriously he took these softly spoken confessions.
“Okay,” he replied, nodding. He followed Rabastan through the doors, back into the castle where they were greeted with welcome warmth. It was nice, especially after the cold wind had sent a chill all the way to his bones. Adrian could not wait to get in the hot shower and warm up entirely.
They walked, side-by-side, down the stairs towards Slytherin, quiet as their footsteps echoed in the dungeons.
At last, they made it to the bathroom, fresh clothes in hand. Adrian had chosen a pair of warm sweats and a t-shirt, hoping they could relax somewhere comfortably once they were finished. Fortunately, they were alone. Adrian locked the bathroom door, hoping to dissuade anyone who might want a midday shower (which was unlikely) from trying to enter. When he turned to face Rabastan, he smiled lightly.
With his sudden movement, even though it was a small movement to sit up, she fell onto her butt in equal surprise. Ugh, how embarrassing. Dahlia pushes herself back into a squat position trying to remain anonymous to anyone on the outside. Their reasoning to be there was different, or maybe it wasn’t, but she assumed neither of them wanted an extra body stumbling inside.
“Oh no. I don’t even go here.” She retorts back in a snippy tone. Her inner Wood scolds her for being rude, and so she lets out a soft sigh. “Are you calling the greenhouse a shitehole or Hogwarts? I mean.. I suppose they use shit for fertilizer in some of these plants.. Maybe a couple of Ted Tonks hair.” What the actual fuck.
Thankful for the steer of conversation to her name she answers quickly. “Dahlia Wood. Who are you?”
Adrian was entirely unsure of what the hell was going on. Was she serious? Had she tripped over nothing? He hadn’t exactly seen what happened. One moment she was standing there, gazing at him, and the next she had fallen flat on her ass. He squinted, uncertain, and looked away as she got up.
“Okayyy....” he replied, trailing off. He wasn’t a people person with the best of people, and this was certainly one of those moments that he did not even know how the hell to react. Adrian had a feeling she was toying with him, but frankly, he did not care.
“Does it matter?” he asked, not bothering to entertain her any longer. Mostly, he just wanted to be left alone.
“I’m Adrian,” he replied, staring at her blankly, unable to predict her next move.
“So it does.” Lucius had replied in a flat, lifeless tone. It was indicative of the lack of willingness on his part to engage in conversation on the subject, moving past his opinions of the atmosphere as quickly as they’d washed over him. Instead, he bends at the knees, crouching only slightly in order to untie his oxfords so that he could dispose of them onto the banking. It wasn’t as though he didn’t have another ten pair, but that was beside the point. These ones were well worn and comfortable.
“I don’t think so, Burke.” Lucius offers a crooked smile, shot sideways as he had to look up at the other boy from where he crouched. “A photo like that might tarnish my reputation.”
He doesn’t put any thought behind whether or not Adrian notices the way his eyes roll as the sarcasm slipped from his tongue. Lucius Malfoy, rich boy prat extraordinaire. What might the people think if they saw him kicking his shoes off and dipping his toes into the icy water of Black lake? Woe.
“You know.. I don’t remember the last time I had to plan anything.” Now that his shoes were off and his socks were disposed of, Lucius planted his dark-slacked bottom against the brisk, hardened sand. It felt odd at first, but his body soon adjusted, as did his toes as the tipped into the icy cold water just an inch at a time.
“What brings you out here?” Lucius’s curiosity is hardly ever sated, even though he’d rarely made a habit of being so loose lipped about it. “Forgive me for being crass, but I didn’t take you for the type to need an excess peace and quiet. You seem to keep to yourself just fine.”
Adrian remained rather quiet.
Lucius Malfoy was near impossible to read. On the surface, he was a pretty boy. Adrian always assumed him spoiled and stuck up, though their limited conversations left him wondering if he had been quick to judge based on his appearances and the way he held himself. It was difficult not to judge his housemates sometimes. They were either absolutely ridiculous or completely snobby. There was no in between. Many were inherently hateful, and Adrian supposed he was amongst those. There were few people in this world he could stand, especially those in other houses.
He watched as the older boy removed his shoes and daringly dipped his toes into the frosty waters. The cold air bit at Adrian’s exposed skin and just watching the other bloke made him shiver visibly. Adrian cringed and looked away.
“And you claimed I was going to get sick,” he muttered.
People often assumed whatever they wanted about Adrian. He was the quiet type, but that was just because he did not believe people were worth his time to engage in conversation with, and he was not precisely a people person. He wondered if, like he had with Lucius, the other had made assumptions about him.
“I know how to keep to myself,” Adrian began, throwing a glance towards Lucius, his eyes first landing on his face before scanning to his pale-white feet as they reflected the lake. “But it seems other people do not know how to do the same.” It was frustrating when people just waltzed over to him, expecting him to engage in conversation. It was not that he minded talking to people so much, but he preferred to be the one to initiate. People just didn’t know when to stop.
“Nah, just-- can’t deal with chatter right now. Lot on my mind, I guess,” Adrian said candidly and honestly. It was unlike him to speak such truths for doing so invited questions he did not want to answer. He scrunched up his nose. “Sometimes you just have to be alone, right? Think it’s all good now, though.”
Kingsley had gotten more than used to people avoiding his eyes when this conversation came up. People felt guilty. Kingsley understood. He always understood guilt.
“Yeah. Though I’ve got some plans to go visit friends around the country a couple of times. Hopefully they don’t fall through. What about you, any plans?”
Adrian nodded vaguely. People made such a big deal about Christmas, but it had always been close to meaningless for Adrian, whose life at home made it difficult to bear the extra time there. Fortunately, he was almost old enough to not get in trouble for his decisions and this year, he just did not give a shit. With his father on his death bed, Adrian would rather be subjected to his parent’s punishment than sit around their house being stared at while brutally high expectations were placed upon him. That just was not his style.
“Sounds nice,” he commented, scrunching his nose in thought. “Nothing major for me. Just heading North.” He left out details on purpose. Adrian did not want to tell Kingsley he was going with Rabastan, as innocent as it might sound on the surface. He was not sure if Rabastan wanted anyone to know he wasn’t going to stay home once he arrived. He had to be sure his mate talked to his brother and parents first. “Not much in the mood for celebrating this year. Guess that’s a sign of aging, right?”
“I was being sarcastic,” Rabastan retorted, raising a brow as he looked across at Adrian, seeing his now serious expression, his hand moving to brush against his friend’s before allowing it to drop away. “I know there is worse. But fine, I’ll stop imagining you in those colors. I prefer you with me anyway.”
Feeling Adrian pressed up against his back, the warmth of his body squeezed in tight against his own made his focus falter for a moment, his mind wandering. Quickly, he forced himself not to think of other things, knowing that it was imperative that he make this broom ride as safe and as smooth as possible for his best friend to try and get him to feel as though he could manage it on his own one day.
Kiss after kiss landed against the back of his neck, his shoulder, causing a shiver to slip down his spine, his lips to purse. He certainly wasn’t making it easy on him. Releasing a slow breath, he squinted into the distance, trying to refocus his mind when he felt Adrian’s hand slip under his shirt, his fingers touching bare skin. A small gasp escaped his lips at the unexpected sensation, his head shaking slightly to keep himself from completely losing it.
“Do you want to then…?” Rabastan said quietly, his voice so low that he was sure it might get carried away by the wind.
Shifting one of his hands, he placed it over top Adrian’s, squeezing lightly before replacing it back on the broom. “I know that it isn’t that simple. Trust me. I know. Doesn’t change the fact that you’re more capable at shit than you realize.”
He knew that his friend might take his invitation to spend the day together the wrong way, but he found that he didn’t particularly want to correct it. Perhaps he had meant it differently, in some way, even if he didn’t realize it himself. Part of him just wanted to get away from the bustle of the castle, wanted to be somewhere where he could be himself, and not have to worry about what was going on around him. He wouldn’t deny that part of that included the desire to curl up close to his best friend and relax.
If other things happened, so be it.
“I didn’t think it was, but I figured I would ask,” Rabastan responded, furrowing his brows as they flew towards the castle, his mind flipping through the different things he knew Adrian was afraid of. “You’re not paranoid, you had a bad experience and it left you uncomfortable. That’s natural. No one wants to fall, though I have always wondered what it would feel like to go a long distance. I’ve only ever fallen short ones.” Licking his lips to wet them, he focused his gaze on the courtyard, figuring they could land in the middle of it with ease. “What is your greatest fear? It’s losing me, isn’t it?” He teased, trying to add a lightness to the heavy conversation topic.
There was a physical reaction from Rabastan at his soft, warm touches and the kisses against his shoulder and neck, and Adrian felt simultaneously motivated to continue on while feeling guilty that he probably should have asked him first. His thumb traced a loose circle against the smooth surface of Rabastan’s skin and he leaned forward, kissing his cheek softly.
“Sorry,” he whispered. “I just missed kissing you. I know I shouldn’t, not here. And not without your permission.” Adrian’s fingers trailed around the side of his stomach to his bare sides. This time, he placed both hands there, holding onto his waist, his fingers digging into his skin.
Adrian nodded. “Yeah, mate. Of course. I want to,” he replied softly, his voice in Rabastan’s ear as cold wind whipped around them. It caused a frigid chill in Adrian’s bones and he shivered, his legs automatically jerking to tighten against Rabastan’s body. Suddenly, he became very aware of just how high up they were. There was an unpleasant swooping in his belly as his hands felt clammy and his feet tingly. He did not like this sensation.
Rabastan offered him much needed reassurance and Adrian forced himself to release a calming breath. If the broom had, somehow, been tampered with, he reminded himself that it would have already bucked them off or made them fall. Rabastan had ridden on it for all of practice, besides. There was nothing to be scared of now except for his own, human error. If he was focusing on something else, he could avoid that from happening.
Adrian glanced ahead, watching as Rabastan made way towards the courtyard below. He was glad they were almost done with this and could soon warm up in the shower.
“Yeah, honestly,” he replied quietly. “Losing you is definitely a topper on the list.” Adrian had never actively thought about the answer to Rabastan’s question before, but the idea of losing his best friend was something he could not stand. “I donno. There are lots of things to be afraid of, I guess. Some more tangible than others. But I’d probably put that at the top of the list, yeah.”
“No need to worry there mate, been copying off my friends for years. I know how to twist words around so it sounds like it’s comin’ out of my head.” he replied. The countless times he had looked over someone elses work, someone with a much better vocabulary and range of knowledge than him. Immediately he knew how to get away with making the work sound dumbed down.
He looked around the classroom for a moment, glancing over at Professor Binns, who seemed to be doing a whole lot of nothing, before looking down at Adrians work as he slid it over.
“You got big plans? Or just itchin’ to get away from all this course work?”
“That’s all you really need to be successful in school. The ability to copy and the ability to bullshit,” Adrian replied, nodding confidently as he smiled vaguely. It didn’t quite reach his eyes, his expression near flat.
Adrian watched as Peter began to scribble after assuring that Binns was paying them no mind. The old ghost wouldn’t have cared either way, Adrian was willing to bet.
“Not really big plans, no,” he lied. Were his plans big? On a personal level, sure, but it wasn’t as though he was going out and doing crazy things, like going to parties or traveling somewhere far. “Just going North with a friend.”
Kingsley snorted and ran a hand over his head. It was too early to think about something this heavy. He’d done such a good job recently of not thinking about Julia, making sure to compartmentalize and not overwhelm himself with the vast reality of everything that had happened.
“We weren’t friends, not close friends anyways, but yeah,” Kingsley said as he closed his eyes, everything washing over him again. “Yeah I knew her. We– We always talked when I ran into her on rounds. I made a point to help her with homework. I didn’t know her. But I knew her. She didn’t deserve that. No one deserves that.”
Adrian nodded slowly and widely. He did not want to get into this whole corner of comforting someone with something he did not particularly care about, especially with a bloke he hardly knew, but he did not want to say something wrong, either. Adrian found it best to say little at all in these situations.
“Sorry, mate,” he said quietly and quickly, his eyes not quite meeting Kingsley’s and instead staring over his shoulder as a few early risers shuffled into the Great Hall for breakfast. They sat at the Hufflepuff table.
“So, you going home for the holidays?” he asked, forcing the subject to change regardless of how much he didn’t particularly want to continue this conversation.
“I don’t know, I think yellow would suit your sunny disposition wonderfully,” Rabastan quipped in return, a smirk curling the edge of his lips as he tried not to laugh. “In fact, Hufflepuff is perfect for you because you’d look like a bee. Nothing’s sting is quite as painful as that.” Quirking a brow at Adrian, he nudged his shoulder, huffing out an amused breath. “Right, because it’s the color that makes the house, ultimately, of course.”
Shifting his gaze, he stared at his friend for a long moment, feeling the warmth of his touch against his skin. He’d noticed lately, the way their touches seemed to linger longer, how they seemed to find excuses to reach out in the first place, and he had to wonder if this was what it was going to be like going forward. There was a new strength in their intimacy, a craving for proximity, and it felt good to know he wasn’t alone in that desire.
“No, you didn’t,” he murmured, pressing his hand against Adrian’s lower back for a second before allowing his hand to drop away.
Getting on the broom, he waited for his friend to get on behind him, glancing over his shoulder. “You should have more confidence in yourself. You wouldn’t have fucked it up,” he said quietly, knowing that in some ways it was a reflection on how Adrian tended to see himself. He didn’t want him to believe that he was a fuck up, that he couldn’t manage shit if he set his mind to it, because he knew the truth from observing him that that wasn’t the case.
“I’m sure, why the hell wouldn’t I want to spend time with you? You’re my best friend for a reason, asshole. I don’t pick people to be my friends if I can’t stand them,” Rabastan pointed out, raising both brows to accentuate his point. “I don’t know. Let’s get washed up first and then we can find somewhere to go where we can’t be bothered, alright? I want to be able to talk. Maybe we can play cards or some shit while we do.”
Pushing off the ground, he tried not to go too quickly or to make any sudden movements, wanting Adrian to get used to the feeling of being on a broom in a way that felt secure. He figured if he could make him feel comfortable and safe, that was the first step in trying to address his fear. “Flying isn’t your worst fear, is it?” He called out, attempting to assess how much work they had ahead of them on this front.
“You’ve clearly not been stung often if you believe nothing is worse than a bee,” Adrian replied sarcastically, though his tone was abrupt and serious. “Anyway, stop picturing me in those dreadful color combinations. I’d like to maintain some form of dignity.”
With arms wrapped securely around Rabastan, he felt a strange sort of confidence that came on rather suddenly. Perhaps it was due to the fact that he knew his best friend had him, would not allow him to get harmed on the broom, or because he was already quickly overcoming this ridiculous fear. He was willing to bet it was the former.
“I didn’t, but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t want to,” he exhaled into Rabastan’s ear before he swallowed roughly. Quickly, before they broke out too far from the line of the trees and became fully visible, Adrian pressed a soft, wet kiss to Rabastan’s neck. Then another against the side of his neck, and one more against his shoulder. That helped in distracting him and making him feel more secure on the broom. One hand moved to slip beneath the fabric of Rabastan’s shirt and he allowed his fingers to linger there, gripping his warm, bare skin.
“Easier said than done,” Adrian murmured in Rabastan’s ear, scrunching his nose. A lifetime of doubting himself, in the most specific of ways, would not be so easy to overcome.
Rabastan wanted to go somewhere that prying ears and eyes could not see nor hear. He wanted to talk and though he was quite certain that he was speaking generally, he had to wonder if Rabastan was hinting at something more specific. It made him bizarrely nervous. “Alright, alright, bastard. You really love spending time with me. I get it,” Adrian replied, smirking to himself. “I’m fine with that.”
The broom moved forward slowly and Adrian forced his eyes to stay open. He was not afraid of heights and he reminded himself that if anything bad did happen, somehow, that he still had his wand and could hopefully move quickly enough to put a stop to them from falling towards the ground and killing themselves.
“No,” he said calmly in Rabastan’s ear. “Not really afraid of flying so much as falling, I guess. I don’t know. Just doesn’t-- seem like we should be trusting these fuckin’ things. A wrongly performed Charm when building them could end us. I know, I sound bloody paranoid.” Adrian exhaled against the back of Rabastan’s neck. “But even so, it’s not my greatest fear.”
