Susanna

my name is christopher palu and i'm here to sew stitches and cut bitches

[the-sapphic-raven]

Shes probably committing crimes right now

[jinxtus-deactivated20210311]

Who is?

[the-sapphic-raven]

What are you, a cop? piss off

[wholesomemes-archive]

[c3po]

*exchanging wedding vows*

me: fullmetal alchemist my wife: *slightly differently from how I said it* fullmetal alchemist

[alvin-flang]

Found this gem in the redlettermedia sub

[perhapsarat]

Theory: JK Rowling is actually Barty Crouch Jr taking polyjuice potion. The real JK Rowling is locked in a suitcase in Scotland. I pray daily for her release.

[lemongrassbellybuttontears]

My conspiracy is she pulled a Gilderoy Lockhart and the Harry Potter series isn’t hers and now she’s writing bad fan fiction to pretend like she actually wrote it. 

[hotboyproblems]

Astrology Tumblr: Your sign says you're a french fry

Me: ME AS FCUK

[rainbow-femme]

Jewish and Muslim people go on Chopped and are made to cook with pork and they make it work, one vegan goes on and refuses to use any meat products he’s given and they have an all veggie episode for him.

[rainbow-femme]

The final basket had honey in it and e refers to it as a total nightmare scenario. Go talk to the Muslim woman who knocked out a pork loin without being able to taste her dish about dealing with nightmare baskets

[death-deafying-stuntman]

My mum was watching a baking show where a 20 year old Muslim woman was a contestant. They had to make an alcoholic dessert. She nailed it despite not being able to taste it. When she mentioned that she couldnt (not as a complaint or excuse) everyone gawked at her and someone said “how old are you???”. Like, really?

[rainbow-femme]

I saw that one! Seemed like purposeful sabotage when your contestant can neither religiously or legally taste the ingredient

[theotheryongbok]

[frogmunist-deactivated20190724]

I’m sure this has been asked before but would vampires drink period blood, and more importantly would the clumps just be a bonus for them?

[ratguzzler-deactivated20181213]

ever had bubble tea?

[zsnes]

im going to hurt all of you im going to hit both of you with a heavy rock

[princesseblade]

it’s pretty much asking if the vampire likes pulp

[monzterzack]

[icebats]

My freshman year of college i had a professor that, on the first day of class, said to a student “oh, your name is Flutey? And youre a flute performance major? What a cruel trick played by god” and i still think about it

[icebats]

UPDATE SHES STILL AT IT

[pokemongifsonly]

[toastbutteregg]

[bob-belcher]

#Oh Gal

[yourpromdressisbleeding]

[jethag]

[3chip]

i drew fantasy costco and the thb for my environments class final!!!!!! this was so impossibly fun to draw, i hope u like it as much as i did <3

[sophiebegins]

only ariana can make an inspiring bop about her exes