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Andrew|He/him

[dykecas]

[jacobtheloofah]

two of them

[basedandfatpilled-deactivated20]

[dostoyevsky-official]

[superchat]

who said a white boy cant get squirky on the beat

[minervablues]

[mapsontheweb]

How to say “big” around the world.

by braziliangeopoliticalmaps

[americanbeautiies]

Visit Original Link

“I’m a female security guard at a truck gate. I’m basically the only female there and I have to deal with a lot of truckers. They all tend to call me things like “sweetheart”, “hon”, “babe”, but I’ve recently started responding with “no problem, sport”, “no problem, champ”. My question is, what else can I use?”

theres just something real special about the advice the brothers give in response to women asking about gross men, and personally i love it more than most things

[thelightfluxtastic]

[Transcript:

Travis: Do you have a gun?

Griffin: No, Jesus, Travis!

Emily: I do not. I do not have a gun.

Justin:  No, Travis, don’t be ridiculous! Do you have a taser?

Emily: I don’t. I have a big flashlight that’s very heavy—

Travis: Hit ‘em.

Justin: Yeah.

[audience laughs]

Justin: No, you don’t have to hit all of ‘em. But if you hit one, word gets around. Truckers love to talk.

[audience laughs]

Travis: “You know, I called her sweet. She’s not very sweet.”

Justin: “She’s not very sweet. I was wrong. I called her pumpkin. She is no pumpkin.”

Travis: “Turns out she’s a human being with a big flashlight.”

Justin: [laughs] “I thought she was a baby angel. It turned out, she’s actually a human being with a very large flashlight—”

[Griffin laughs]

Travis: “You guys are never gonna believe this!”

Justin: “You guys are never gonna believe this. Do you remember that sugar dumplin’. I thought she was a sugar dumplin’. Turns out she’s a person and she’s very strong. And surprisingly fast.”

Travis: “She had a flashlight and she knows how to use it.”

Justin: “Yeah. Yeah. Please, get the word out. Tell other truckers.”

[Griffin and audience laugh]

Justin: “And y’know what? Listen. This is gonna sound wild, other truckers. But if this—”

[Travis laughs]

Justin: “If this suga-baby-angel could turn out to be an actual living human being, [laughing] we can’t really run the risk that others could be too.”

[Audience laughing]

Travis: “What if they all have flashlights?”

Griffin: “What if they all have very big flashlights?”

Justin: “Hey, What if all women have flashlights?”

Travis: “What do we do then!?”

Justin: “What do we do then? We can’t run that risk! Maybe we just play it safe—”

Griffin: “Maybe we just be cool!”

Justin: “Just play it safe and be cool.”

Griffin: [imitates horn] That’s the big horn they have.

Justin: So anyway, I guess our answer is just flashlight one of them and I’m sorry for any repercussions-

End ID]

[luxwing]

Before lowering my corpse into the ground for eternity I'd like to thank John Roderick and the long winters for the use of their theme song it's a departure from the album putting the days to bed.

[dogtheories]

nothing but respect for MY kind and benevolent dm!!!

[sweaterspoons]

[id: a drawing of travis mcelroy. he’s a white guy with a brown beard and hair cut short on the sides, and grown out n dyed purple on top. he’s wearing a big purple robe with a star pattern on it, as well as a little purple and red eye-shaped earring, tinted red glasses, and red nail polish. a glowing reddish eye has been drawn over his forehead; he’s looking up and to the side with a delighted expression, and he’s got lil red sparklies drawn by his face.

in his arms, he’s holding a bunch of books and papers. one of these is the dnd 5e player’s handbook. another has text on it reading, “ENTERTAIN AND INSPIRE YOUR PLAYERS” and one of the papers facing the viewer has the words “spoilers!! dont look!!” written on it. end id]

[badlydrawnmcelroys-deactivated2]

The two genders

[acadieum]

i gave up on trying to make this look good but i miss the ipre crew man :(

[handsmotif]

my phone made a really good video from the pictures I had saved of justin mcelroy

[thekingkez]

someone: taako put your tiddies away

me: m o r e  t i t

[thekingkez]

I saw this post and truly, Moron Loving Moron content.

Commissions | Ko-Fi | Twitter

[thekingkez]

from this tweet. sometimes, you ARE immune to spooky sales propaganda.

Commissions | Ko-Fi | Twitter

[masterofsomething-deactivated20]

some of you were never introduced to the world of the mcelroys through the adventure zone resulting in you finding it difficult to differentiate between justin and travis for a while and it shows

[leoriowithaknife]

when magnus is in the archives idk i’ve never listened to it