let the music soar

° •°•★ rain • 26 • they/them • white ★•°• °[icon description: a shiny buneary sprite over the orange and pink lesbian pride flag]

[sweaterspoons]

tha sweaterspoons blog glossary

#chatter = original posts. just talking to talk

#comfort = cute stuff. buneary. stars and rainy weather aesthetics. the works

#fwiend tag = my fwiends💙

#image description = descriptions i write, either on my own post or reblogging someone else's. my blog is not 100% accessible but i try to only share media that is described!!!

#tag for posts that remind me of ___ = oc reblogs. it's mostly ttrpg characters!!

#aliya tag = the d&d campaign i play sidley in RIGHT NOW!!!! we're not going to save the world but we're going to try!!!

#maze tag = long-term campaign i run, set in a never-ending hell maze where you either find your greatest wish or you die

#nevermore tag = oh my god operation nevermore... shorter campaign i can't really tell u about...... but listen the found family really found-family'd in this one

#rem tag = a setting im hoping to run lots of games in!! currently running short(ish) adventurer's guild games

#morgan monday = weekly game night number 1☝️💔🔪

#siffrin sunday = weekly game night number 2✌️⭐️🕓

[bisexualityjunkie]

[lemondoddle]

[ID. a tweet by (@ eat5G) reading, "thank you for being nice to me" with an attached photo of two young prairie dogs holding hands together." end ID.]

[koobiie]

shoutout to everyone who wants to infodump but cant string together coherent thoughts to form sentences and instead just look at you like this

[autistichare]

[ID: Drawing of a red-faced, weeping person holding up and pointing at a piece of paper with a stick figure on it. Their contained emotions are leaking out of their face. /end ID]

[rars]

saying this as a lesbian who loves women's boobs--sexually, even! but i don't think that we as a society should consider breasts inherently female or inherently sexual. a flat chest should not be seen as the "default" for gender neutrality but instead just one way a person can present. boobs should be normal. anyone of any gender can have boobs

[pregnanthudsonwilliams]

not naming names but some of you are so creative and talented it's an honor to have you in my phone

[probuccalfat]

nobody else doing it like me. particularly because the way i’m doing it is needlessly difficult

[siffrin-of-the-day]

Day 247 Frin: Squiiiiishhhy!

[ashoss]

“word hashtag my word #myword” has done irreversible damage to my vocabulary

[ravioliet]

walking a mile in the shoes of someone you dislike is actually kinda awesome because not only are you now a mile away from that idiot but you also have their shoes

[kuttithevangu]

Being a calm, gentle, non-reactive person is really hard work, which is probably why many people are none of these things. Personally I think it’s worth it but sometimes one does want to just roll around on the floor wailing at the top of one’s lungs

[kuttithevangu]

People in my notes who think I’m repressed or dissociating: you will feel better when you learn emotions are not a binary of Not Feeling It vs Being Overwhelmed By It

[blorbospinninhouseplant]

Ok but How Do I Do That

[kuttithevangu]

Self-regulation for adults: Strategies for getting a handle on emotions and behavior - Harvard Health

Learn strategies for enhancing self-regulation skills, and discover the benefits of mastering this essential life skill to help emotional dy

There are many techniques (also, there are drugs)

[blorbospinninhouseplant]

Thank you, but do you have any advice for teens?

[kuttithevangu]

So my FIRST piece of information if you’re still a teen is that genuinely as you get older it will get easier to regulate your emotions. During adolescence our brains are undergoing a lot of growth and change that genuinely does make it harder to do this, on a scientific level. However, practicing emotional regulation skills can still help a lot and if you can find something that works it will make life easier going forward

This page has more information and recommendations for some basic exercises:

Emotional Regulation for Teens: Strategies to Manage Intense Feelings

Discover effective strategies for teens to manage intense emotions, develop emotional awareness, and improve overall well-being. Expert tips

[siffrin-of-the-day]

Give them the launch codes

Day 246 Frin: Teaching them to make a bomb

[geyfrog]

*puts my hand on your shoulder* Don’t worry, I have your back. We’re gonna turn this crisis into a crwaswas

[pompombot]

That's just how I am....I get obsessed with something for a while (I couldn't help but add a little green) Anyway, here's a Loop melting... because, yeah, my obsession isn't just with the color green, but also with candles

[genderkoolaid]

also the thing about "we need to focus on the people most vulnerable, and transmascs may be vulnerable but not more than trans women!" is that it doesn't consider transmasc erasure as an active force.

its a take from the perspective that trans men are "vulnerable" is some vague abstract generalized way, not in a way which would behoove anyone to adjust their behavior or take action on their behalf. its the erasure of erasure; the assumption is that trans men probably have enough resources and support anyways, which could not be farther from the truth. some local communities may have more transmasc-focused resources, but many others do not. transmasculine people are left out of vital conversations, are excluded from vital resources, are ignored and forgotten when they are abused and killed.

it treats transmasc erasure as something which is passive in itself and which can be solved passively. which is erasure itself in action. i do not really give a fuck about "who has it worse," it is not about that. it is about the fact that if YOU do not make an ACTIVE EFFORT to advocate for transmascs, to make transmasc suffering and oppression visible and legible, it will not happen. it simply will not happen.

erasure is an active force. we all internalize transmasculine erasure and we can all easily contribute to it; we are expected to contribute to it. trans men&mascs cannot afford the model of "well we only need to raise awareness for the most vulnerable" because our vulnerability is defined by being ignored.

this is why unlearning anti transmasculinity has to start from (un)learning erasure. once you start to see it as an active force/tool of the patriarchy you realize it is the lynchpin that holds so much (especially intercommunity) anti-transmasculinity together. transmaculine absence is so normalized people experience our presence as an intrusion, and people genuinely do not understand why we would ever need to be more visible than we are. it is fucking everywhere.

[genderkoolaid]

like idk i remember reading about a trans man in India who, after he came out to his family, was literally locked in a room in their house. just shut up in a basement somewhere, out of sight and out of mind, until he managed to escape (and even then, there's also a trans man in India whose parents sent the police to track him down and kidnap him from a shelter meant specifically for trans people).

or trans men like Sophie Lederer, who was only 19 when he was arrested for "talking silly and claiming to be a boy" in the early 20th century, and the only other thing I know about him is that he spent the rest of his life, over a decade, institutionalized for his transmasculinity. god only fucking knows what was done to him in those years by his wardens.

that is the image of transmasculine erasure. it is boys and men locked in closets and basements and prison cells disguised as hospital rooms for years until they are dead and buried as women. if they even get a headstone at all. it is dead-eyed mothers with three children who have no income or job experience and are married to a cis man ten years older than them who they know would kill them, and possibly their children, if they even mentioned being trans. if you think of transmasc erasure or "invisibility" and imagine a white cis-passing guy working stealth at his office job, congrats! transmasculine erasure is already living like a fungus in your mind. i am trying to make you feel the horror the patriarchy has trained you out of feeling about the state of transmasculine oppression.

[genderkoolaid]

#Robert Eads died a preventable death from ovarian cancer because no gynecologist would see him#They refused to have him in his clinic because they werent familiar with trans men and because it “would reflect badly on the practice”#By the time he was finally seen the cancer had metasticized and it was too late.#Transmasculine erasure kills#and it's still happening TO THIS DAY.#There is very little difference now than there was 30 years ago.#The other day i watched a video from a trans man who called at least 30 different gynecology clinics#before he found one that wouldn't be weird and cagey and discriminatory against trans men.#All to get a pap smear. A routine examination to screen for cervical cancer.

[genderkoolaid]

given that the UK government accepted guidance which excludes trans people from single sex spaces which specifically includes this:

I am once again telling y'all that trans men&mascs literally cannot afford this oppression Olympics bullshit. Care about us, specifically, on purpose, or you will help them kill us.

[dekarios-tower]

[ID: 13.145 If it is justified to provide a separate of single-sex service, then it will not be unlawful discrimination because of gender reassignment to prevent, limit or modify trans people's access to the service for their own sex, as long as doing so is a proportionate means of achieving a legitimate aim (schedule 3, paragraph 28).

13.146 For example, a trans man might be excluded from the women-only service if the service provider decides that, because he presents as a man, other service users could reasonably object to his presence, and excluding him is a proportionate means of achieving a legitimate aim. end of ID]

[bardically-uninspired]

aaand… scene!

[raccoonmilf]

If the only thing that has kept you going was outliving Mitch McConnell, imma need yall to pick a new person to outlive and fast. Your mission is not over.

[genderkoolaid]

#there's like five easy ones right away

[deslizada]

man sometimes friendship really is just "I saw this and knew it would give you psychic damage. please respond with agony" and then they do. and it's great