[gentlebeardy]

[angryfecker]

Kid AU where somehow Izzy and Ed grow up near Stede’s family home and at first avoid him because he’s just another rich kid living a life they’ll never have. Then they see him being way out numbered when he’s being picked on so they beat the ever living shit out of the Badminton twins and their friends and Stede sneaks them food and sweets and they hang out by the lake catching frogs until it’s dark. 

[goodsirs]

Con O'Neill as Israel “Izzy” Hands in Our Flag Means Death — S01E03 “A Gentleman Pirate”

[angryfecker]

I love Lucius’ google results.

[angryfecker]

Lucius: I’m just saying, the next time an older man tries to have a ‘father-son’ bond with me I’m going to either call him ‘Daddy’ or tell him to call me ‘Daddy’. Which ever seems most amusing at the time. 

[angryfecker]

I just think every member of the crew should wear slutty little crop tops like Ed’s in season 2 and this is especially aimed towards Izzy Hands and Stede Bonnet. I think it would be healing.

[angryfecker]

Get those Matching Besties Icons

[angryfecker]

Has this been done yet?

[angryfecker]

Izzy Hands after Stede Bonnet came into their lives: How am I supposed to Live, Laugh, Stab in these conditions?

[johannestevans]

thinking about izzy and jim forming A Dynamic that's like. mutually violent and sarcastic and perhaps a little flirty (in the way that 2 wildcats are flirting when they're about to rip out each other's throats but then are redirected to an external target)

just stuff like how. jim throws knives in canon and is extremely good at it, but israel hands is MASSIVELY skilled at throwing knives in treasure island and that's A Whole Thing of his, and there's so many ways they can bond over that

but like. so outfit swaps are hilarious, izzy knowing some spanish and catching jim by surprise is funny, jim being able to handle izzy and shut him down is sooo funny

can you imagine the nonbinary convo like

jim: idk i just feel like an outsider to gender, like it doesn't apply to me, like i'm my own thing

izzy, impatiently: yeah, everyone feels like that, anyway--

jim:

izzy:

izzy: everyone fee--

everyone else: NUH UH, MR HANDS

but the absolute FUNNIEST part of jim and izzy being Having A Dynamic is that like can u imagine oluwande sometimes catching a glimpse of izzy doing something that's very jim-core, and being disgusted and horrified to realise that he could potentially find him attractive

[angryfecker]

One day when Ed’s teasing and prodding at Izzy, Iz gets a little fed up and points out the fact that they’ve known each other a long time and he has plenty of embarrassing stories about Ed that he could share with the crew. Edward rolls his eyes with a ‘be my guest, mate.’ to call his bluff. The crew is naturally curious. Izzy starts talking about their time on Hornigold’s ship when ‘Edward used to beg me to sleep right up next to him on deck because the big baby didn’t like being cold,’ Izzy told them, lightly mocking his captain with a smirk. Edward with a straight face let it falter to psssh. “This man was a twig and still put out heat like a damn forge. You’d cuddle him too -- and hey you fuck. You agreed to it every time, so really -- it’s just as embarrassing for you, ya little shit,” Edward shot back at him smugly. To which the crew was awwing. Pete is nodding and looking at Blackbeard with ‘It takes a strong man to admit he can’t always brave the elements, Captain. Very admirable.’ Frenchie’s clapping Izzy on the back, “That is really quite sweet of you Izzy -- didn’t know you had it in ya.”Lucius is scribbling all this down and taps his fingers against the cover of the log. “Yeah. A true shocker. A n y w a y s. Give us the deets, Captain. Inquiring minds wish to know -- Was Izzy a little or a big spoon?’ Which at this point Ed’s gotta restrain Izzy so he can’t frisbee throw the log overboard.

[angryfecker]

Izzy: Oh, babe! You had a crush on me! That's embarrassing.

Stede: We're married.

Izzy: Still.

Ed: Mate you didn't know you were in love with me for like a decade.

Izzy: ...Shut the fuck up