Mitochondria and Coffee

Marc

[local-lesbian-tree-demon]

they should invent a body that feels normal to be inside of

[guerrillatech]

[silly-slacker-person]

There are political newspaper comics that aren't this succinct

[druckers]

i would fuck him [remembers im talking about a real person] um [remembers its normal to be attracted to people] i would fuck him

[scorpionlafemme]

[sandmandaddy69]

[cryptvokeeper]

[wifegideonnav]

“bits to use in everyday conversations”

[that-house]

Being a little too cold: brrrr i’m a little too cold !!!

Being a little too warm: i am going to kill the next person who makes eye contact with me.

[sabertoothwalrus]

getting a set of 100% linen clothes is actually really problematic and dangerous because it has made me want to throw out every piece of synthetic fabric clothing in my wardrobe and replace it with more linen

[bugwars]

It is imperative that the customer remain unaware that employees drink water, it frightens and scares them to think of an employee as having human needs

[batsandboba]

“scientists don’t want you know” is a phrase that always cracks me up because if you actually meet a scientist they will be shaking and crying like an overstimulated chihuahua with the need to let you know

[sarakipin]

Anything to walk on land 🔪 2021

[spicymochi]

they are on a date

[gloomsday]

sent this message to my coworker today and he sent me this screenshot with microsoft teams's suggested replies... incredible 10/10 no notes.

[fagcrisis]

i hate the word spicy can we bring back calling things erotic

[maryoliveoil]

rolling up to Wendy's to get an erotic chicken sandwich

[mi-ciudad]

let’s fuck in the roller coaster tycoon bathroom

[goslinggf]

i love you rice with some bullshit

[3000s]

if you're not 26 years old right now you will be soon

[tromboneralert]

But I just turned 30.....please......dont make me go back there......

[3000s]

i'm sorry there's nothing we can do about it