Prudence’s hair

and her whole body and personality that’s it

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Tumblr being the "piss on the poor" reading comprehension site makes sense when you realize that 79% of adults in the US are functionally illiterate. Same goes for Twitter and TikTok.

that's a real high number, sport. where'd you get it?

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

hey anon

please tell me you didn't google "US literacy rates" and then make the funniest possible mistake one could make in that situation

[sunflowerbutch]

fake geek girl accusations have always been stupid and misogynistic and racist but the absurdity is really Highlighted when it's megan. megan thee stallion. lying about liking anime for men's approval. to impress whom, jeffrey? tyler, is megan thee stallion so worried about attracting you that she's faking her interests in her own songs? her own chart-topping songs? hunter, are you feeling ok? preston? zachary, do you need a cold wash cloth? how many fingers am i holding up austin

[adulthumanproblem-deactivated20]

[genderyomi-deactivated20240903]

[myqueenmarceline]

While all of this is true, I also think it's worth highlighting the not-insignificant amount of racism in the hateful comments. Their issue isn't just that a popular or pretty girl likes anime, it's that a black woman (especially an attractive one) can't possibly be into anime. It just doesn't compute, no matter how many black people, celebs or not, show up to cons or cosplay or even just talk about it. I also feel that a lot of the gatekeeping and dismissing her faves as mainstream falls into this category. They keep trying to push her back into the out-group, because from their perspective she can't possibly be a real fan.

[rlyehtaxidermist]

"immortality sucks because all your friends die" all your friends die anyway. those we do not mourn are those who mourn us.

"immortality sucks because you forget who you are" we always forget who we are. do you remember who you were at four years of age? who you were at fourteen? "who i am" is a shadow cast on the wall.

"immortality sucks because" skill issue. skill issue. skill issue. give me your liver

[mortalityplays]

if you spend your life bitching and complaining about the fact people are 'expected' to engage in the dreaded pointless banal '''small talk''' instead of learning to trade pleasantries with the people around you, you will never know the true and heady joy of doing a dumb bit with a complete stranger and as a result your soul will remain small

[mortalityplays]

there are random strangers out there who are just waiting to hear all the worst jokes your dad ever told you and if you don't open yourself to the delight of saying hello how's it going, och you know, living the dream as always, you will simply never find them

[orcboxer]

One thing that's vitally important to remember is that feeling ''weirded out'' is not a form of harm. It is a completely normal part of socializing. It is the feeling of encountering something unfamiliar. In order to be a kind person, you must learn to how to distinguish between "harmful" and "weird." And then you must accept the weird.

[etherealnoir]

Happy "Hozier Isn't A Woodland Nymph He's A Human Man Who Listens to Black Music and Fucks" Day to those who celebrate

[queerspacepunk]

i want to be asked to come over and help put my friend’s kids to bed as casually as they might text their spouse and ask them to pick up milk on the way home

i want to stop and pick up milk for another friend because i know their spouse hates the grocery store

i want to buy fruit that i dont like because it’s on special and i know people who do

i want to pass lemons over the fence and to take my neighbours bins out when the forget

i want group chats instead of rideshare apps, calls in the middle of the night because someone’s at the hospital, lonely or hungry or both

i want to do the dishes in other people’s houses, extra servings wrapped in tinfoil and tea towels so it’s still warm when you drop it off, a basket of other people’s mending by my couch

i want to be surrounded by reminders that ‘imposing’ on each other is what we were born to do

[log6]

"Christ on a cracker" well actually I think you'll find Christ is the cracker. And also the wine. But you wouldn't know that you fucking protestant heathen

[ghostcasket]

every medical professional who’s ever drawn my blood desires me carnally

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

I don't think I've seen anyone talk about this at all on Tumblr, which is very lax of us all, so I suppose I shall do it myself.

Last week Elon Musk broke European law so badly that the lawyers who will finally put the case to rest have yet to be born.

I'm not exaggerating. Here's the thing: America has terrible data privacy laws. A solid technique for an American website owner in times of financial hardship, such as accidentally buying a loss-leading debt-ridden social media platform to avoid going to gaol, is to take all the data harvested from users and to sell it to third parties for lots of money. It is fun and breezy and lets you pay off at least one lawyer for the month. What a lark.

However, the European Union has an even more fun and breezy law called GDPR.

And the thing is, the EU really, really care about GDPR. Like... they really care. This is not one of those grey area laws like jaywalking where it's basically ignored unless you do it in front of a police officer who is having a midlife crisis because his wife left him and the dishes are piling up and he's down to his third day of wearing the same pants and yesterday a man in the pub laughed at him for getting a football term wrong. This is the sort of law that, if you break it, grey men in grey suits with worryingly little humour will get in touch and unroll terrifyingly long scrolls of legal text and then you are in gaol for the rest of your life. This is a big law. The big one. Big boy law. Do not break.

So, if you're going to be a website owner in times of financial hardship who needs some quick money to cover your many billions of dollars of debt who decides to sell the private data you harvested from the user base, the most important thing you absolutely MUST remember is, you can only use the American data, and never the European.

But.

I mean.

Hypothetically.

If someone were to own an American website in times of financial hardship, such as an accidentally bought loss-leading debt-ridden social media platform to avoid going to gaol... but that someone didn't know the difference between American and European law.

Well then. That person would sell the wrong data.

And if that were to happen, on the scale of a global social media platform, with users ranging from the megalomaniacal Uber Rich to literal world governments...

The ensuing court cases would last for decades, as lawyers began the lawsuits at the richest end of the list, and worked their way down.

***

Also he posted a Twitter poll today about whether he should stay in charge of Twitter and he lost lol

[cherokeefrank]

living in america, he's not bound by euro laws. Last I checked they outlawed guns damn near. Certainly the kind I get here in Texas. I don't see any British Bobby asking for my loicense.

It's an opinion poll. It's not legally binding. Also, careful what you wish for, he might instate Trump as CEO, just to piss you off.

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

Gather round, children, gather round.

Many of you are asking how a man who operates a business in the EU could possibly be so blisteringly stupid as to not understand that EU laws apply to that business. Many of you don't understand the sheer absence of braincells necessary for an oversight this staggering. But I'm delighted to say that my lovely assistant Tumblr user cherokeefrank is here to demonstrate for you all

[justarandomgirly]

Matt Damon explains why they don’t make movies like they used to. Pls watch.

[luna-rainbow]

This is actually a really good perspective and explains why the MCU is the way it is. It is essentially one-off entertainment without the backup of DVD sales (of course Disney being Disney it is still backed up by massive merchandise and spin off sales). The movie is designed to be “disposable”. The rewatch value is low because it’s not intended to be sold on DVD for people to treasure and rewatch every year at Christmas (or whenever) with family. The idea is to generate hype, through manufacturing controversy or teases or gossip. Keeping spoilers under wrap is integral because the rewatch value is negligible. It hinges on surprise or shock (or wtf value) to entice audiences to give up their money to see it in theatres. It is about spectacle, about being loud and colourful and busy, so that for the first 30 minutes after you walk out your senses are still buzzing and you feel like that was worth your $30 or however much. It takes a while for your brain to come back online after the sensory overload to then try to pick apart the plot, and by that stage it doesn’t matter, you’ve already hyped it up to your friends.

And the story or characterisation doesn’t matter because no one is watching that again to care.

[kradeiz]

(x)

[klngfili]

Happy low opacity elrond day to all who celebrate it

[crap-userrname16]

[spareplanets]

i stopped watching house of the dragon bc i felt like something (jaime and brienne) was missing :/

[reythemandalor]

‘Why can’t I produce a male heir? 😭’

My brother in Christ your family tree is a circle.

[tybaltstan]

Claudio: I really like this whole ‘good guy, bad guy’ thing you guys have going on.

Beatrice: It’s not an act, it’s just that I’m mean and Hero isn’t

[shakespearecircle]

I wrote this in like a rambley freak out at work. Forgive me.

So like the line ~kill Claudio~ is a bit of meme. I have made memes about it. But like, I love it. I love Much Ado, it’s 100% in my top 5 favorite plays (not that I could ever actually decide on my top five), and it has so many killer lines. “I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow than a man swear he loves me.” “O God, that I were a man! I would eat his heart in the marketplace.” “I do love nothing in the world so well as you. Is not that strange?” “I love you with so much of my heart that none is left to protest.” “I will live in thy heart, die in thy lap, and be buried in thy eyes—and, moreover, I will go with thee to thy uncle’s.” But if I really, really think about it Kill Claudio has to be my favorite line in the play because it does so much. It is fucking hilarious line and it’s also so serious and filled with so much meaning.

So, we’re in this scene and Benedick says “Come, bid me do anything for thee.” He’s just told Beatrice he loves her and she said it back! They’re full of this giddy, lovey energy. “Come, bid me do anything for thee.” What she should say is marry me. What Benedick is expecting her to say is marry me. What an audience is expecting her to say is marry me. But what she says is, I want you to kill your best friend. “Kill Claudio.”

The anatomy of the most basic joke can be broken down into two parts: setup and punchline. The setup is usually something innocuous something you would hear and think ah yes I know how this is supposed to end (Two men walk into a bar; Bid me do anything for thee). The punchline, the part that makes it a joke, is the surprise. The story doesn’t end where the audience thinks it’s going to (the third one ducks; kill Claudio). Half of what makes something funny is the surprise. Kill Claudio is definitely a surprise to everyone and can 100% be played for laughs.

But here’s where Kill Claudio becomes more than a joke.

Beatrice knows what she is. She spends the whole play doing whatever she wants, saying whatever she wants, because she doesn’t have any skin in the game. Her life isn’t over if she doesn’t get married. She’s a well-off woman who doesn’t have any parents or anything to inherit, so she doesn’t have anything to lose and really doesn’t have anything to gain either. Beatrice is as free as woman can be in her situation. She doesn’t have any power, but she does have her freedom. Why would she ever do anything that requires her to give that freedom up?

So if we back this scene up from Kill Claudio to Hero’s wedding. We watch the most important person in Beatrice’s life get ruined in just one moment. Claudio breaks his promise to marry Hero, a promise that in Elizabethan England would have been near unbreakable, and humiliates her in the most public way imaginable, almost guaranteeing that Hero will never again find an eligible suitor, which means she will never get married and when her father dies, her entire life and the lives of everyone she loves will be ruined.

Then we come to Beatrice and Benedick. Alone for the first time since they realized how they felt, and they confess their love.

“Come, bid me do anything for thee.”

Beatrice can change her life right here. Hero’s life is ruined and Beatrice can no longer rely on her family to provide for her. But she can marry Benedick, her uncle can make her the heir, and she can save her family. But the person she cares for most would still be ruined.

“Come, bid me do anything for thee.”

The only way to restore a smidgen of Hero’s reputation is for someone to challenge Claudio.

“Come, bid me do anything for thee.”

Beatrice acknowledges something important. Her freedom doesn’t give her power. She can’t issue any challenge. She can’t save her cousin. The only person who would have that power is a man. She says, “Ah, how much might the man deserve of me that would right her!” and “Oh, that I were a man for his sake! Or that I had any friend would be a man for my sake!”

Beatrice is entirely self-aware. She knows her limits. So when Benedick offers to do anything for her she asks him to do the one thing that might save her cousin.

“Kill Claudio.”