anxious otters

an otter with crippling anxiety who writes & draws stuff (sometimes)

[anxiousotters]

blog info

hello there! I’m otter/otters (they/them)

my ao3 is anxiousotters and all my art is tagged with #otter's art

ask box is always open, feel free to say hi or send a question! currently obsessed with star wars and hockey and very normal about both

[nosongunsung11]

collection of posts for a very specific dynamic

[anxiousotters]

LEAGUE. CHAMPS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[rozrozhollander]

What Ilya says: Hollander.

What Ilya means: #loml #sweetheart #autistic angel #hockey god #hottest man alive #literal sunshine #endearing little bilingual shit #my future husband

[brightloveee]

I know we talk a lot about how Ilya turned himself from a ho into a housewife, and how much he loves to be a My Husband guy. "My Husband" this, "My Husband" that, "Have I told you about My Husband Shane Hollander?" And yes. True. Love that.

BUT, do you ever think about how quietly, but equally, chuffed Shane is to be a My Husband guy too?

There are definitely points in Shane's story when he thinks This Fcked Up Thing Between Them will never amount to anything but sex – he doesn't dare even entertain it until the cottage. And there are YEARS in between when Shane is pretty much convinced that in order to have a happy future, he would need to be in a heterosexual relationship. He has a lot of internalized comphet notions that take him trying and failing to date Rose to dismantle. Based on his upbringing and environment, he thinks he NEEDS to be with a woman in order to have a long-term partner that he can be with publicly. Rose is the ONLY person he's ever liked enough to even consider, but he can't even like HER enough for that.

There has to be a period of mourning, after that conversation with Rose, when Shane thinks maybe he WON'T get to have a partner. After all, things with Ilya are FAR from assured at that time.

Meanwhile, he's certified Husband Material. As I've Shaneterpreted before, he's a major Protector and Provider. He's DYING to do Husband Chores for someone. Man the grill. Mow the lawn. Make the fire. Kill the spiders. He's worked so hard, he's built this big cottage, and for what?

He WANTS to share it with someone, and for a while there's a strong possibility that he won't, and he'll never get to have that.

So when it all works out, and he gets to think of himself and Ilya as an "Us," I think he gets a little smile to himself. He's calling the pharmacy like, "Hi, yes, I need to refill a prescription for My Husband." "Hi, is this the lost and found? My Husband lost his earbuds again." "Two tickets, for me and My Husband."

He looks normal. For all the world he's as calm and collected as ever. But internally, he's JUMPING for joy. He gets to have a husband! And it's ILYA!

[anxiousotters]

cap is telling us we have to wear SUITS for the finals?!

[anxiousotters]

OH AND THE LEAGUE IS GIVING US A BYE WEEK SO FINALS ARE ON MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!

[anxiousotters]

I’d like to thank my team, my league, and stat holidays for the absolute bender we went on after last night’s game

[merlyn-bane]

a selection of away jerseys from the it's your life universe, because what is drawing oc's from that universe if not an excuse to play with some of the team branding you've already made up?

pictured are luke cormier, @pyromanicdaydreamer's oc myles anzjøn, connor moss, and ryan li. connor and ryan may or may not have their own stories planned if the muse holds.

(i am aware that in the real nhl, ALL away jerseys are predominantly white. i simply do not care. the otters get to have glacier blue because i said so <3)

@anxiousotters @lttrsfrmlnrrgby @happybean17 @meebles

(if you'd like to be added or removed from the tag list please let me know <3)

[merlyn-bane]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

the almighty art prompt generator says: size queen shane 😇😇

and i say: dildo sucking & lingerie

[anxiousotters]

2/4 DOWN LETS FUCKING GO BABEYYYYYYY

[phantom-of-the-keurig]

I know for a fact Commander Cody banned all null arcs and any Skirata affiliated Commandos from his ship. You wont catch any of them stepping a toe on 212th territory because Cody will blow a gasket and we need him for the war he’s running 75% of it at this point

[phantom-of-the-keurig]

The shinies won’t believe this because the Commander never swears but the veterans will tell you there’s been a single, documented instance of Cody saying Fuck and it was when he was in the presence of Ordo

[anxiousotters]

youth hockey camp highlights from the past week:

became mortal enemies with a group of U9s. this was as serious as the Leafs vs Habs rivalry

traded sticks with a U7 for a bit (adorable)

so much freeze tag

parachute resistance training (?)

made up outlandish stories about my hockey career and scars. told a different story each time I got asked

lots of (temporary) theft of gloves, sticks, water bottles, etc

lots of keep away games featuring the aforementioned pilfered items

introduced myself as Coach Otter and stuck with that for the whole week until I revealed it wasn’t actually my name on the last day

got in to a chirping match with the U9s. some of my favourite ones were “you look like a dragon” (thank you?? I think??? dragons are cool!! but also you’re saying I look like a lizard. which. rude) and “you’re so slow you can’t even skate” (absolutely hilarious thing to say to the camp skating coach)

chirping eventually escalated to a full on brawl (I lost) (they tripped me) (I got flattened onto the ice by ~10 kids)

cap tried to give one of the kids a fist bump after a goal. kid missed his hand and punched him straight in the crotch

apprehended two U13s who were sharing a pair of roller blade skate guards (they were fully booking it down the halls with only one roller skate guard each. thankfully no teeth were lost in the arrest)

played lots of two touch and ball hockey

played goalie (badly)

started a cult with the U11s

ritually sacrificed best bud to the hockey gods at centre ice with the U11s

brought my mini sticks in for rec time on the last day. absolute chaos

tied SO many skates

my team of U11s beat best bud’s team in the final showdown scrimmage. THE RITUAL SACRIFICE WORKED!!

[anxiousotters]

1/4 PLAYOFF GAMES WON!!!

[merlyn-bane]

It's Your Life

Luke Cormier is a professional back-up goalie and roster plug. In his five seasons in the NHL he's played for five different teams, filling in wherever he's needed. He enjoys the work, values the friends he's made along the way, and even if his career will never be glamorous, he knows he's already beaten the odds to have been able to play in the NHL at all. Especially as an openly queer black man playing in a position that only has 64 roster spots across the entire league.

Even still, he can't quite shake the feeling that something’s missing. Maybe the sixth time will be the charm, with an organization that's willing to give him the chance to develop and a pretty young star center that seems bent on testing Luke's self control.

Adopted at a young age by an American Hockey Hall of Famer, all Aleksey Lindholm really knows is his father's legacy and everybody else's expectations. Stepping into Patrick Lindholm's skates and carrying on the name he's been given is what he was raised for, and playing the role comes as easy as breathing.

He loves hockey...even if it means having to make sacrifices for the sake of his career. Coming out can wait until he has a few Stanley Cup rings to his name...right?

Preseason

Regular Season - October

Regular Season - November (Pt 1)

Regular Season - November (Pt 2)

[wlwarhammer]

A lot of people ignore the absolutely radioactive levels of frat boy coming from Shane Hollander because it’s inconvenient to their hyper feminized bottom stereotyping

[anxiousotters]

HOLLANOV THOUGHT:

okay so we know the water bottle scene. we love the water bottle scene. specifically I’m thinking about the point where Shane takes a sip of water and then Ilya quietly says “more”:

I bring this up because in Ilya’s speech in Russian he says that people are constantly asking him for “more, more, more”

that’s what’s different about his relationship with Shane. from the get-go, Shane doesn’t ask for more, but Ilya gives it to him freely anyways. and if that’s not love, idk what is