APastorsWifeLife

My name is K'Cee,I am married to my high school sweetheart Jonathan. We have two awesome kids, Dominik is 14 and Ashlynn is 12. Decided to blog about how i "try" to juggle being a pastors wife and full time/working mom. I will share my struggles, my...

[apastorswifelife]

And another one....

Today the kids will begin their new journey as Cane Bay Cobras as we take them to register for classes. Ashlynn will be going to 7th grade and Dominik will be in 10th! So TRANSITION! Another one... Transition also associated with the word change…which for most is a bad word; but unfortunately it’s part of life and we would not grow, meet new people, experience new things if it wasn’t for the changes and transitions. The Lee kids are about to make a big transition this coming school year. They have attended a private Christian school for most of their school years. Dominik started when he was in 2nd grade and Ashlynn started in K-4. This is all they have ever known. But we have prayed, talked, researched about putting them in public school. We chose Christian school in their early education years because it was what worked four our family and our kids. The school my children attended had smaller classes, great teachers, small community, and of course the biblical teaching. So yes, we are excited and nervous for our kids. We know that public school can be a lot more eye opening but we also are not naive to the fact that private school doesn’t mean they are exempt from seeing and learning things of the world. We feel as parents we have set the foundation. Our kids know what we expect, they know what we approve of and what we don’t, and they know that no matter what we will love and support them through the next year. Are we ready! Heck no! Will it be tough! Yes, believe me I have been wearing my armor already all summer, and been in prayer on my knees! Praying for the friends they will make, praying for the teachers, praying for them as they embark on something new! They are both nervous but I believe that this will be a great transition. I am thankful for the opportunity of being part of youth ministry for so long I feel I am ready and it has equipped me to better know how to minister to my children, but also know that they need mentors as well and I am glad they have that. Here are a few verses that will be my go to for this school year and fellow moms I hope these are prayers you can turn to and meditate on as we lift up our children! Pray that they will be brave as they face the challenges that are before them. Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go. ~ Joshua 1:9 Pray that the Lord will lead them as they begin to make more and more decisions as they get older. Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6 Ask that God keeps them safe in this increasingly unsafe world. That He will protect them from harm and wickedness. He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust. Psalm 91:1-2 Pray that they will show compassion on those in need and who have less than they do. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. ~ Ephesians 4:32 Ask God to give them a sense of justice – to stand up for what is right and to defend the weak. Learn to do good; seek justice, correct oppression; bring justice to the fatherless, plead the widow’s cause. ~ Isaiah 1:17 Pray that they will grow in wisdom and understanding. That they’ll be more than “smart” and embrace what is good and right. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. ~ James 1:5 Pray that our children are filled with the love of God. That they will know how deeply they are loved, and that love will overflow onto others. Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. ~ 2 Corinthians 13 So here we go!!! Prayers appreciated!!

[apastorswifelife]

The Calling

Somebody, somewhere is depending on you to do what God has called you to do. I read this over and over as I scrolled through Instagram one day. I kept thinking to myself and pondering on what really had God called me to do. We live in a world where it’s so busy. We are looking at our watches and planners to see what’s next. We are filling in any little bit of time with more things. We keep busy and we keep moving on. I thought to myself, is that what God has really called me to do? To keep penciling in more things on my plate. To keep going from one appointment, meeting, counseling, coffee, party, dinner meeting, event. Just going and going! Then it hit me! God wants us to have relationships. He encourages it, but the first relationship we need to be working on is with Him. We can’t really thrive in relationships around us if we don’t thrive in the relationship with Him. In the end if we don’t have that relationship with him how can we know what He has called us to do. The crazy thing is we can get caught up in thinking that the things we do in our everyday life are not good enough, they are not big enough but sadly we are mistaken. God has us serving in our jobs, ministries, in our homes, in this time because of that calling! Not all of us are called to step on a stage and preach the message, not all of us have a voice for worship, and not all of us will be called to move to another country. But you my dear friend are called! We all are and if we think that the “small” calling we have in our life is not worth it we are sadly mistaken. There is someone who is depending on you to take that calling and do it! Whether it’s singing worship songs and making puppet animals with kids on a Sunday morning, or holding sweet babies in the nursery, whether it’s going to your corporate job every day, whether its serving high school students that may be difficult to work with, whether it just being home with your little ones, whether its volunteering at your local school or nonprofit…YOUR CALLING IS WORTH IT! We sometimes get caught up in the fact that it’s OUR calling but your calling has so much more to do with OTHERS than it does with yourself. Don’t get me wrong I believe God wants us to dream God sized dreams that connect with our calling, but for one minute don’t think that because a lot of people don’t know your name or know what you are doing that it goes unnoticed. HE sees you! Those people that are counting on you see you. Let me also say that God doesn’t want us to stay comfortable in our calling. He doesn’t want us to get complacent. He wants us to grow not only in our calling but in our faith and sometimes that means stretching and moving in a direction or way that only we can trust that HE knows what HE is doing. Where we may not know the outcome but we trust that He has our backs. So go ahead stay at home mommas, teachers loves on those snot nosed kids, be the light to those coworkers you business suit wearers, hug on those babies you nursery workers, put your skinny jeans on and pour into those students you serving in youth ministry, dance and sing with the kids those of you in kids ministry, YOU out there reading this, wherever you are in this time in your life take your calling and run with it! For those of you running from your calling you know who you are. It’s time to come back because someone, somewhere is depending on you to do what God has called you to do! Much Love!

[apastorswifelife]

15 Years Baby!

15 years!  Wow, to be honest in our first years of marriage I would have thought we wouldn’t make it through year one. It was rough. I would be lying if I said it wasn’t a struggle. Getting married young is hard, mix in no relationship with God, throw a baby into the mix 4 months later and it can be a recipe for disaster. Being married at 18, moving far away from any family you know was hard as well. But I wouldn’t change those first few years for anything. It was tough. We couldn’t just call mom and dad to help us. We couldn’t just go to their homes for help or guidance. We had to do this on our own. But growing up together having to learn and walk through this thing called life together has made us who we are.

There have been many tears, but many more smiles

There have been days of hopelessness but so many more days of faith

There have been days of feeling alone, but so many more hugs

There have been days of silence, but many more moments of laughter and conversation

There have been days of “what-ifs”, but many more days of “let’s go for it!”

There have been times of discouragements but many more times of peace

There have been disagreements, but much more compromise

There was that ONE time we celebrated our Anniversary on the wrong day but many more times we actually celebrated on the right one! (Our first year married we celebrated on the wrong day. We only found out when Jonathan’s step mom Patty called us to wish us Happy Anniversary and we were confused!! Bahahaha we special!)

All in all the good has ALWAYS overcome the bad!

Jonathan is not only my husband, but my best friend. We have shared our fears, our dreams, our sadness, our hopes, or joys, even parenting side by side; which can sometimes be rough when you have been raised differently. We have built a home together! Which most people say can make or break a marriage. I think we broke that mold because we enjoyed building our home. But to tell you the truth the most important thing we could have done as marriage partners is to partner with God. I give all the glory to God when it comes to my marriage surviving. I give him all the Glory when we share the testimony of our marriage with others! 

Bragging Moment: Well because this is my blog and I can! He can cook yall! Just saying. He can build pretty much anything, he is smart, he does laundry, he gardens, he loves me and all my craziness! Ok wait it sounds like I don’t do anything..I do I promise! haha

Happy Anniversary Jonathan! Love ya!

[apastorswifelife]

Today I kidnapped my daughter!

Today I kidnapped my daughter!! Yes, well not really a real kidnapping but I took her out of school early. I showed up with some clothes for her to change in to (she wears a uniform). She didn’t understand why I was there or why she was leaving school but I did. Today I stole her away from the drama at school (yes,that good ol’ middle school drama) I stole her away from the school work, which will be there when she gets back on Monday. I stole her away from the normal school day stuff. Because before I know it my 12yr old will be graduating and heading off to college. Before I know it she will not come to my room or meet me in the kitchen to talk about her day. She won’t ask me to buy facemasks so we can have girl’s night. She won’t ask me what shoes look better with her outfit. She won’t come and lay in my bed as we talk. She won’t half the bag of popcorn with me as we get ready watch the Voice. She won’t be there to help make dinner or her favorite banana bread. So today I kidnapped my daughter and we had the most fun afternoon. I had bought tickets to the matinee showing of Beauty and the Beast; which by the way was amazing! We shopped. We laughed, we cracked jokes, we smiled and we enjoyed our girl’s afternoon. Working full-time, being involved in church activities, and of course the kid’s school work and extracurricular activities can have us running around 4-5 days out of the week! Sometimes we just have to kidnap our kids and steal them away from the busyness of life and spend time with them and do things they enjoy doing. As I write this Jonathan has kidnapped our son Dominik and headed to FL to see some spring training baseball games. They have an annual father son trip and I know that these small things will be great memories for our children. Life is short so steal some awesome moments!

[apastorswifelife]

I QUIT!!!!

A new year is here which means another new list of goals and resolutions. Every year I write out my goals and as I looked back on my list from last year I did most of those things which was awesome! But instead of just saying what I want to accomplish this year and setting goals there are some things that I will be quitting and maybe, just maybe you should too!

I will quit letting my insecurities hold me back

I will quit looking at myself in the mirror and pointing out all my flaws

I will quit looking at others’ lives and comparing

I will quit saying and start doing

I will quit letting busyness get in the way of my relationship with God

I will quit saying yes when I know it’s too much

I will quit overloading my plate

I will quit thinking that I am not good enough

I will quit saying I don’t have me to exercise

I will quit worrying (this one will take major time and prayer) 

I am sure there are more things but for now you have to start somewhere. What are some things you plan to QUIT this year? Till next me! Peace!

[apastorswifelife]

[apastorswifelife]

Calling all parents of preteens and teens!

Its tough! Ain't going to lie. Sometimes Jonathan and I just look at each other in despair. What do we do, how do we handle this one. It’s your turn, that’s all you right there. Rock, paper, scissors….haha kidding it don’t get that far. Here lately the devil has been attacking our children at all angles. In disobedience, in choices they are making, in words they choose to use, in some of their friendships/relationships they are involved in. Sometimes I sit back and think where did I go wrong? But the fact of the matter is that the small no-nos they may have gotten into as little kids didn’t have huge repercussions like the choices they make now will. It is my job as a parent to lead them, instruct them, show them (in the way I act), and most of all pray for them! 5 things that I have to remind myself lately are: 1. Their choices, although they may affect me do not show who I am as a parent. They are of the age now where their decisions are theirs. Yes, we can help them make better ones but when they don’t we can’t beat ourselves up. 2. Patience- it is hard but if you blow up first thing after they do something wrong they may never come to you for the bigger things. Be a parent that they can talk to..no not as a bestie but as person they can open up to and trust. Let that be you. 3. Don’t compare your kids to other people’s kids, either out loud or to yourself! They are their own people; they learn differently, see things differently. We have to remember that God made them in our wombs so perfectly as He did us. They are who He meant them to be! 4. Don’t get caught up in only pointing out when they do something wrong, it’s easy to do that. It just normal that we expect them to obey, listen, be respectful, do their chores, put their laundry away but its always nice to hear a “thank you.” Things to remember your children need to hear are: I love you I am proud of you I believe in you I am sorry- there are times when we need to apologize You are important/special. 5. Don’t take the time you have left with them for granted. I will admit there are times where I am on my phone texting and Ashlynn will have to tell me the story she has told twice already because I really wasn’t listening and being attentive to her. Embrace those moments that they just want to talk, maybe you are dead tired and they come and sprawl on your bed to bug you or chat; embrace it because time is flying by. It is going by way too fast for me! I wish I could hold both of them on my lap like when they were little. Story moment: So Dominik got his phone taken away (that’s a whole other story). On Monday he had basketball conditioning and it was to be over at 5. I arrived at 5 and waited outside the gym for about 5 minutes. I didn’t see him so I walked up to the gym and saw him sitting in the chair. He got up and looked at me with an annoyed face. He came out and said “you are late!.” I said, “no, I’m not. It said in the email it was over at 5.” He said, “well we finished early, if I had my phone we wouldn’t have to worry about this!”. I just took a deep breath and said, “You will not blame me for you not having your phone. That was a decision you made on your own when you chose to do what you did.” We got in the car and he was still huffing and puffing. Finally I said’ I am sorry but I will not let you be disrespectful to me because a decision you made, it is not my fault you do not have your phone and I will not put up with you treating me this way!”. He just sat quietly. When we got home I got out of the car, walked upstairs, and began to change so I could go for a run. I could hear him right outside my door saying, “MOM!!” I said, “ I am changing what do you need.” He said. ‘ ok I will wait.” I opened the door and he was lying on the floor. He said, “ help me up I am too sore to get up.” I said, “ no, you were being rude .” He said, “please.” So I helped him up and he gave me a big hug and said, “Mom I am sorry and I love you.” I got a little teary eyed because at 14 you don’t get that many hugs!

[apastorswifelife]

Divine Interruption

So I try to run about 3-4 times a week around my neighborhood. The last few weeks I have been taking some time to listen to worship music and pray. A lot of changes have been going on in our lives. We were getting ready to put on home on the market and making sure to get our to do list done to put it on the market as well. We only ended up showing our home for two days and we had a contract, which was amazing!!! As I was walking  that next week I noticed a home in my neighborhood for sale. I felt like I should pray for that family. I began to pray that they would sell their home quick. That they would be able to get what they wanted for the home. The next week I walked by their "for sale" sign and seen that it was still not sold. I kept praying.

Fast forward to yesterday, I got off early to see Ashlynn perform in her school pep rally, then headed to the church to help my mom set up to sell her famous tacos at the football game. Before the game started I decided to run home change my shoes, throw a load in the washer and grab a hat for Dominik. As I got out of my car I began to walk up the driveway and I heard a guy say 'excuse me ma'am". I turned around and said "yes sir". He said "are you the new home owner or the current home owner?" I said "I am the current home owner". He said,  "wow your home sold in two days!" I said "yes." He said "my wife and I our selling home, I noticed right away that it was the home I had seen on my run the past two weeks, because I noticed his company van. I said "yes, I have been passing by your home on my weekly runs and I began praying that y'all would sell because I know how crazy it is the try to live life and have your home shown at all hours of the day." He said, "wow! you have been praying for me!?" I said "yes, I felt the Lord asked me to". He was blown away. I talked a little bit about our home sell, about how we had an inspection that day and to pray for us too. He said "I have been worried but when I passed by your home the other day seeing the "sold"sign gave me hope!" I said "I will continue to pray for you" He said, "thanks" and drove away. I was glad I was home at the time to stop and have a quick chat with him.

So today as I was getting ready to head out I heard a knock on my door. I opened it and it was Aaron...the neighbor around the corner. He said I already talked to my Pastor, I told my best friend, he said "I haven't told my wife yet cause I have to wait till she gets off work but i wanted to make sure I told you...." I said, "did you sell your home??!!" He said, "yes!" He said, "they offered us 5000 dollars less but its a cash offer!!" I was like, "that is amazing!" He said, "when I got home yesterday I told my wife about you and I told her that I believed you were and angel sent to tell me not to worry but that He had control." He said, "and we prayed together and we prayed for you!" I got chills, I began to tear up. I said, "I do believe that God was using me yesterday." I said, "you know I was only coming home for about 5 minutes and in that time you came around the corner to find me. I believe that God has divine appointments and that yesterday he appointed me to you!" He said, "I am a believer and I pray" He said, but I do worry and we are not supposed to as believers and I needed that appointment yesterday!"

He said, "I would love to bring my wife to meet you."  I said, "I would love that!!!" We talked a little bit longer and I told him Jonathan was in the Navy he told mew he retired from the Navy and I told him Jonathan's story about being called into ministry from the Navy. He told me he would love to see if we could come share our testimony with his church! I told him we would love that! He said, "I just got to give you a hug!" I then told him to keep me posted and continue to pray for us as we would do the same.

WOW! God is a rockstar. That guy knows how to show up and show out. I am so thankful that he used me yesterday and that even though I was in a hurry and  I may of had a small interruption that God used that as a DIVINE interruption!

[apastorswifelife]

Wake Pray Slay

WAKE PRAY SLAY

I seen this recently on an Instagram post. I mean i don’t know about you but I'm thankful that there are some amazing and inspiring women of God that I can follow that are not only passionate about Jesus but they have some amazing words to share. This really spoke out to me. I proclaimed this would be my new motto! I proclaimed that I would live by this little saying, so short but with 3 strong powerful words!

WAKE- the definition means to emerge or cause to emerge from a state of sleep; stop sleeping

Wake, it reminds me of the time Jesus prays in Gethsamine. He tells the disciples to wait there and keep watch while he goes to pray. He comes back and they are sleeping. He goes out again and then for a third time and comes back to find them asleep. 

I love how the message version says that he address the disciples in Matthew 40-41. It says, When he came back to his disciples, he found them sound asleep. He said to Peter, “Can’t you stick it out with me a single hour? Stay alert; be in prayer so you don’t wander into temptation without even knowing you’re in danger. There is a part of you that is eager, ready for anything in God. But there’s another part that’s as lazy as an old dog sleeping by the fire.”

Reading this really got me thinking. The devil sits around waiting to steal, kill, and destroy not only myself, but my husband, my kids, my family, and my friends! He will be watching and the minute we are sleeping in the comfort and contentment he will strike. I want to be a person who is alert at all times. There is a spiritual warfare out there and if we are not awake it will consume us in every way possible. Let us be alert, let us be awake!

PRAY- Morning is my time to pray. I actually work about 15 minutes from work which in SC traffic time that means 1 hour! Yes 1 hour! Ugh. But during that time my radio is off, it’s where I have my alone time with Jesus, where I can pray out loud like he is my Homie. I mean He is, He is my friend and He is my father. Prayer can take place anytime but I believe for me that morning quiet time with the Lord is important and plays a big part in how my day will go. He is the refreshment I need, He is the small voice I need to hear, and I ain’t going to lie He keeps me from yelling and honking in that morning traffic! 

Prayer, let it be part of your daily routine.

Colossians 4:2 says, Devote yourselves to prayer being watchful and thankful. Prayer is not where you can come to the Lord for guidance, help, and answers  but to also praise Him!

and last but not least...

SLAY- Now when I think of the word slay, to me it means my favorite outfit or a nice pair of heels. It is that outfit that makes me feel confident in who I am. Where all the pieces from the hair, makeup, outfit and shoes just go together like peanut butter and jelly or for you fall crazies like pumpkin and spice!!!

But as I was reading in Mark I came across something that really put meaning to WAKE. PRAY. SLAY. 

In the Message version It says, 35-37 While it was still night, way before dawn, he got up and went out to a secluded spot and prayed. Simon and those with him went looking for him. They found him and said, “Everybody’s looking for you.”38-39 Jesus said, “Let’s go to the rest of the villages so I can preach there also. This is why I’ve come.” He went to their meeting places all through Galilee, preaching and throwing out the demons.

There Jesus shows us the perfect example: he woke, went to pray and then said to Simon let’s go. We got work to do. He went into Galilee and shared the gospel and there they cast out and slayed demons!

I believe this is the people God wants us to be! To be awake, to be in constant prayer and to be His hands and feet.  To spread the gospel. To speak life into the lost. To heal. To slay addiction. To slay temptation. To slay and cast out demons!!!!!!

This week let it be your motto!!

[apastorswifelife]

His Timing

Wow it has been a heck of a 3 weeks. I would be lying if I said I have not been angry, upset, emotional about the timing of things that have happened.

July 8th it all went down hill from there. I got sick early that morning with back pain and was throwing up all night. I sometimes have episodes like that and i always thought it had to do with eating too much or just the wrong greasy thing. Usually after a few hours and getting rid of all the contents of my stomach I am good to go. But that didn't happen so around 430pm my mom took me to the ER. Jonathan had committed to something, he said he could find someone to take over but i told him to go. In the ER we found out i had gallstones and my gall bladder was inflamed and I had a bad kidney infection. I was given pain meds, antibiotics and told to follow up with my PCM. 

That Monday the 11th i meet with my PCM and after she she seen the scans from the ER she said it looks like i need to get rid of my gall bladder. She referred me to a dr. I called Wednesday to see about the referral and they had scheduled me to see the Dr. the 22nd. I told them that couldn't wait that long. So they scheduled me for that next Monday the 18th. On Friday the 15th i started feeling horrible at work, So i called the Dr. and the nurse finally was able to get me in at 2:45pm that day. I arrived to the Drs. office which was right across the street from the hospital. It only took him 5 minutes with me and he looked at me and said we are admitting you to the hospital right now and we will be doing emergency gall bladder surgery on Saturday. It was crazy. I was nervous, scared, i wanted relief but didn't know it would happen that fast. I called my husband and he made sure to take care of things so that he could get to get to the hospital.

I was already going to be off the next week because Jonathan’s mom, dad, sister and her boyfriend and kiddos were coming to visit for a week. TIMING! It wasn’t the best timing. I had my surgery saturday. the Dr said my gall bladder was “NASTY”, yeah and he gave me a container that held the biggest gallstones ever. 

I was released from the hospital that evening about 8pm. I was tired but was in good spirits. After church on Sunday I came home and went to sleep while Jonathan and his mom grocery shopped for the week and got us packed up and ready to head to the lake house. We left around 4 and headed on the hour drive. 

That Monday i started taking pan meds oxycodone, i started getting a rash so called my dr and they prescribed me hydrocodone. Jonathan had went to work that Monday so he picked it up. I started taking the other meds and the rash still did not go away. Wednesday Jonathan drove me into town and I was given a steroid shot, steroid meds, allergy meds and ibuprofen for pain. 

Thursday was a great day! I woke up. Ate breakfast with the family. Watched the family fish, hung out laughing and talking. It was one of the best days since the craziness started. I want to shout out to my amazing inlaws Donna and Jay, I know the kids had a blast with you you. We are so thankful for you and all the help you gave us. Also to Shana and the kids. I am so glad you came to visit us! Wish we had more pictures haha.

Then early Friday Morning around 2:20am i started feeling a little pain. So I took an ibuprofen, I immediately started throwing up. I couldn't stop. I tried to take nausea medicine but every time i drank water i would throw up. it felt the same way it did went i had the episode on the 8th except i shouldn't of been feeling that way because my gall bladder was gone. Around 330am Jonathan said we needed to go to the er. That was the longest trip of my life. We were an hour from the hospital. Finally after blood cultures, ivs, cat scans, morphine for the pain I was told I had an infection. When they took my gall bladder out there was still some nasty stuff left over (bile &puss i know gross sorry) So that was the cause of the pain and the rash. Around 330pm the CT docs came in to roll me to CT where they would insert a drain to get all that icky stuff out. This is where i felt the worst pain in my life. EVER! I was awake, the numbing meds didn't take, the pain meds didn't work and I felt everything as they inserted the drain. As tears rolled form my face i just keep thinking how could such an easy surgery turn into this. Why me and why now! 

I finally was released on Sunday around 5pm. The next day we were supposed to leave on our first Family Missions Trip that Jonathan and i would lead together. Except I had a drain in my upper abdomen and I wouldn't be going. I was bummed. I was angry. The next day as the family finished packing. My husband got up super early to do laundry, mow the lawn and get things ready for not only him and the kids but for me i cried. I cried and cried. I am normally not a crier but it was ugly. And I was mad. I keep asking why God. Why now? Why at this time? Why? 

I’m telling you my husband has been the best through all of this. From helping me bathe as best i could in the hospital, helping me to the bathroom, sleeping in the most uncomfortable hospital chairs to just be beside me. Holding my hand as the tears rolled down the side of my face after the drain was inserted. Bringing me a chocolate shake, making sure the kids were taken care of. It was humbling. I am an independent person, and it was important for him to know that i NEED him. He gives me strength, he encourages when i think i can't, he sees the best in people, he is an mazing guy and I am thankful. That through sickness and health thing was real for us the past 3 weeks!

What i failed to mention was that Thursday (the good day)  there was a book in the restroom of the lake house. I picked it up and i read the verse for that day.  It was Mark 6:31 it says, 

31 Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat, he said to them, “Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.”

I thought to my self I am resting thats good. But I feel God was preparing me for the next few days. It was time for ME to rest. I am always busy doing, going, moving, plans and schedules. My body needed rest and if it took taking me to this point to get me there that was what He had to do. So now I am resting. I am relaxing. Reading and vegging out on TV shows. I am taking some time for my body to heal and get better. I wish I was on the missions trip with my family, but i know its important for me to take this quiet time alone to get in that quiet place and rest in Him. 

[apastorswifelife]

Some thoughts to Ponder

My reading this morning...wanted to share

"The Lord will guide you continually, and satisfy your needs in parched places, and make your bones strong, and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters never fail."

Isaiah 58:11

As I read this I pondered what that really meant to me personally. I thought about all the times I made my own decisions based on my feelings or what I thought was the best way to go. I thought about how I thought that having nice things, and money were the things that would satisfy. Now don’t get me wrong liking nice things is not wrong. Being financial stable is not either. But when we think that those things will make us happy we can be very disappointed when they don’t. Most of the time when we get those things we want in life that we think will make us happy thereis something missing, and instead of looking to the source we think we NEED more. Why is that??!! Isaiah tells us so clearly in this verse.

Isaiah was writing this to the nation of Judah and the people of Jerusalem. During this time there was great political turmoil in Judah, and the nation of Israel was divided into two kingdoms. He was telling them that even though all these many things were going on the Lord was going to guide them. When things seemed to be bad he would make them strong! When they felt like they had nothing left he would give us the water of life. He would pour his Spirit onto us! He satisfies our souls in the drought. Not only does he pour onto us to fill us up but He does this so we can pour it out on others! His love, mercy, grace!

I thought of some key things that I wanted to share:

 The Lord is a compassionate guide….I mean think about it even when he is guiding us and we want to go another direction he is gentle. He cares. There are times when we end up going in our own direction and it doesn’t quite work out and there He is to offer us grace.

 He is a faithful guide….He is always there., looking out for the best for us. He wants the best for us!

 He is a perfect guide-  He is perfection. He knows our life in the end as well as the beginning.

If we truly can grasp this last point we can be free in knowing that He opens and closes doors because HE knows better than we do!

One of my favorite new verses!

Till next time!

K’Cee

[apastorswifelife]

Summer and the Working mom

As I pull out of the drive way early in the morning, the kids are still sleeping. Its summer, the time where the kids can stay up a little (or a lot) later which means they sleep in. Although its summer, I am a working mom. I work a full time job outside the home and summers are hard. When I would rather be home making breakfast or let’s be real probably brunch for the kids, planning awesome fun things to do for the day, enjoying the awesome SC weather! I admit its hard looking on social media as moms are hanging with their kids at the pool or the beach. They are having picnics and hitting up the park. I wonder a lot if I am making the right choice. I have an amazing job, I work for amazing people, and my boss even let me change my work schedule for the summer! I am thankful for my position and where I am at, but I can’t help but have those days where I question if I am missing out on more. Then I realized, I am not the only working mother out there, there are many of us, who kiss our kids goodbye while they are still fast asleep as we slip out of the house to work. There are many of us working to help out financially. There are many of us that enjoy working out of the house and being around adults…even though sometimes you feel as if you are around children at work! Hahaha ;0 So, shout out to all the working moms! You are awesome, you are important. It IS ok to work outside of the home. Do not let the fact that you are not home with your children 24/7 make you feel inadequate or that you are not a good mom! I am reminded of the Proverbs 21 woman. Even though she remained nameless, yes she was so significant. It’s not the fact that she stayed home, and she knew how to cook ( which shoot I'm already failing at) and clean well. That she was full of wisdom and had great business sense; which is great and valuable to any Godly woman. It was her fear of the Lord that made her a virtuous woman! Proverbs 31:10-31New International Version (NIV) Epilogue: The Wife of Noble Character 10 [a]A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. 11 Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. 12 She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. 13 She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. 14 She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. 15 She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants. 16 She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. 17 She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. 18 She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. 19 In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers. 20 She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. 21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. 22 She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple. 23 Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. 24 She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes. 25 She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. 26 She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. 27 She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. 28 Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: 29 “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.” 30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. 31 Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

[apastorswifelife]

And just like that And just like that I have a middle schooler and a high schooler. Time is going by so fast. I pray every day that I am doing the best as a parent. I pray that they know how much I love them. I pray for the plans that God has for them. I pray they begin to grow more in their relationship with God. I pray for great friends for them. Ones they can trust and confine in. Middle school and high school can be hard. But I pray that they know its just one small miniscule part of life and there is so much more after! I pray for the teachers that they will have next year and the years to come. I pray for that they always know that they can come to their dad and me with anything, even the hard stuff. But my biggest prayer is that we embrace these next 4-6 years with them in our home. That we spend more time together. That we spend more time talking rather than demanding or scolding. That we spend more time loving more than fighting. That we agree to disagree. That we encourage rather than discourage. Ashlynn: I pray that every day you see the beautiful young girl you are! I pray that you know that you are fearfully and wonderfully made. That you don’t have to be like anyone else, that you are more than enough. That you are smart, kind and strong. That you can do anything when you have God as your guide! That I enjoy crafting, baking and going on Pinterest together! Dominik: I pray that you know that you are smart, funny and clever. That you have so much to offer the world. That you see that no matter choices you make we will love you always. That God had gifted you with the gift of humor and creativity. That you have an amazing personality! That I enjoy the moments we just sit and watch funny vines together! Dominik’s teacher Mrs. Dickerson shared this verse at his 8th grade bridge ceremony and I thought it was perfect! Colossians 1:9&10 For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you. We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives,[a] 10 so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God.

[apastorswifelife]

Where is your faith??!

Where is your faith!? A question God pretty much slapped me with recently during my quiet time on my way to work. It was instant conviction, but not in a mean way it was in God’s graceful way but strong enough to get through to my head in that moment.

Jonathan and I had been hoping to sell a home that we own in Texas. Jonathan had been talking to a guy who was interested for a month or so. He seemed interested even going as far as to ask our renters to take a look at the place. I prayed that God would let the house sell. That the guy would be interested and in selfish way I thought of the amazing furniture, nice stuff, home decor, back yard entertaining stuff I could buy for our new home we are about to begin building. Finally the money talk day came, and you know its getting real when that happens. They guy told Jonathan he would get back to him in a week to either agree to the sale or turn it down. I prayed and prayed over the next week. Finally after almost a week and half no phone call. Jonathan decides to call him and no answer, he leaves voice mails, no return calls, he texts, no text backs. Finally after a week of trying to make contact we knew that this wasn't going to happen. I was bummed, I was upset, I started to worry, I started to let the devil steal my joy of the future plans of a new home! I started to think things wouldn't work out. That first week after realizing the home was not going to sell I was really upset and a little angry. 

Then during my morning devotions in the car ride to work, God asked me so clearly “Where is your faith??!” Instantly I knew what he meant. Later that day i told Jonathan that i knew why the house didn’t sell, I knew it was because of me. If the house did sell I wouldn't need faith! 

Hebrews 11:1, “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Faith is the substance or assurance of things we hope for, but have not yet received. 

Faith comes before a prayer is answered or before an individual has received what he or she has requested from God. If we have received what we asked for, then faith is not needed. 

If the house would have sold I would have not needed faith! Sometimes God closes doors to strengthen our faith, I could be mad about the door closing but I believe God continues to do these things to keep our faith growing because he is preparing us for bigger things to come.

So where is your faith? What area is God growing your faith in?? Trust Him and he will never cease to amaze you!

Till next time love you guys!

[apastorswifelife]

Yesterday we took a walk around the land on what might be our last time we do before the clearing and building begins. So this picture is of us standing where our living room will be soon!

[apastorswifelife]

HOME

The definition of home is a place where someone lives permanently, especially a member of a family of household.

Home has always been a word that carried little weight with me. When I was younger I moved around a lot bouncing back and forth between living with my mom and grandma. Then at 18, I got married and the Navy sent us to our new “home” in Goose Creek SC. We were in that home for about 2 years then our next “home” was in Honolulu Hawaii. We lived there for almost 5 years (and yes I loved it and did not want to move back to the mainland). Currently the home I am living in here in Summerville, SC has been my home for about 8 years. This is probably the longest I have lived in a home. It is where my kids have been since they were 3 and 5. Now they are 11 and 13. It is where the Navy moved us but where God kept us. It is where we have celebrated many birthdays and holidays. It is where my son met his best friend who lives on the other side of the circle.

It has always been a dream of Jonathan’s to have some land. To have enough room to garden, to farm, to have chickens, to have farm animals and for me I have always wanted a larger home to host people. I love people. I love to have people over; I love to host cookouts, ladies night, game nights but our home now is pretty small. I am not saying we don’t do those things now but I have always wanted to just have a little more room. We purchased land about a year and a half ago about 2.5 acres and now we are about to start building our dream home. It is so surreal, it’s exciting yet bittersweet, and it’s fun yet stressful. But God has always been so faithful in providing for us! Some days I am super excited thinking about the fact  that we will be able to have room when family comes to visit, but then I think about my kids and how they will be leaving their neighborhood of friends, but then I think about the bonfires and fun they can have out at the ‘Mini Lee Farm”. I think about how close we are to everything and now if you forget your lunch box guess you don’t eat (kidding good thing Jonathan works by the school).  I think it would be weird not to feel this way so I am embracing the months we have here in our home now.

I am excited that the God has allowed us provision to start on this next journey in a new home; I am excited to start making new memories in this new home. A home is what you make it, and I can’t wait to make this a home with Jonathan and my kiddos!

PS: Color Selections are this Thursday! Pray for me, my brain hurts already! And if you know I took that personality test and I am 73 percent left and 27 percent right brain so you know I need extra prayers hahahaha!

[apastorswifelife]

When your son asks you to dance you take him up on that offer. Needless to say we were cracking up and need to choreograph better! haha