くコ:彡

scotland || 🩺

[rosewearsclothes]

please do not thirst follow me. i am a philosopher

[giftofgabber]

I cherish the cthonic in my life ^_^

[segamascott]

[sanitymakesposts]

That's grinslop. You're only smiling because you're happy.

[nightporter1980]

tumblr users love to act like fanfiction is important

[lustcannibalism]

you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for a nuanced reason

[correlatedcontents]

The night is cool and balmy.

Your SECURITY GNOMES are raising an alarm.

> define 'balmy'

Balmy means "pleasantly warm."

Your stock of DICTIONARIES has decreased to 31.

Your SECURITY GNOMES report BANDIT ARTILLERY!

> observe night

The night is cool and balmy.

Your SECURITY GNOMES have entered COMBAT DELIRIUM.

> resolve temperature discrepancy

You haven't acquired enough THERMOMETERS to notice the discrepancy.

Your SECURITY GNOMES have activated the MEAT THRESHER.

[dogpuppy]

[factbot]

scallion is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously.

[the-demon-cat]

oh fuck the solarpunks just seedbombed a courthouse

[deathtofun]

I told a guy his total was 13.21 and he said “wish it were that year, could actually get some good music on the radio”

[regularlesbian]

breaking news from the AP, our boys on the front have just sacked constantinople. take that, heretics. coming up next are the soothing lute dirges of bing crosby

[villainessbian]

*screams of a witch burning at the stake*

THOU ART CURRENTLY LISTENING TO

*Gregorian chanting*

13.21

*leper bell ringing*

HIGH MEDIAEVAL FM

*recording of John Lackland sobbing as he signs the Magna Carta*

WHENCE COMETH NAUGHT BUT LITURGIES

LITURGIES

AND MORE LITURGIES

*Templar knights praying out loud*

THIS ISN’T THY GRANDMOTHERES STATION

*Imagine Dragons - Radioactive starts playing*

[lakevida]

the menstrual cup and menstrual scepter

[lakevida]

your majesty what is upppp

[nonlynear]

[suddenly disillusioned] my illusions..

[teratocrat]

"even the top gets pregnant" cryptic new statetement from the World Health Organisation

[estro-boi]

[zizelle]

ilove homosexuals i  love bisexuals  i love trans !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yayy ayyayy ayy Weare all sooo ocool

[plum-soup]

your silence on fresh basil pesto is deafening.

[evilvillain123456789]

my dipshit husband needs me to check in on him after he asked to be locked in a cage. if i dont do this tedious femdom bullshit with him he says hes going to go to the police about my insane southern gothic style relationship with my quasimodo style brother