Arnaut's Sexy Times Blog

33 / transsexual dyke / something like a bimbo?

[stonerbellybabe]

I love it when a fat girl drops a piece of food and it falls in her tits and she picks it back up and eats it.

It’s like seeing a frog on a lily pad. like yeah buddy that’s exactly what you’re supposed to be up to

[bigbellyjudy]

In this video, watch me gobble up IHOP breakfast and chug beers until I belch and moan and groan 😩 enjoy seeing me stuff myself while my bel

[st00pidhimbo]

[noire-clearing]

[cunt-puppy]

need to be groomed & manipulated by an older woman

[shelbyblueeyes]

[eatthekidsfirst]

I will never understand why people upload cropped, low-res, uncredited art. Here's the full piece, originally created for a collaboration with watchmaker Ulysse Nardin:

Milo Manara, 2019, Ulysse Nardin, 2, mixed technique on paper

[loveonmarz]

🍒

[gaytanicpanic]

[aqarititss]

Titty Tuesday:)))))

[prettypinkmatter]

[lilithsterrarium]

"Okay Lilith, Mommy's gonna go see some of her friends for lunch! You're gonna be a good little girl and wait for me to get back, right?"

PETLIKE NAIVETY: SHE'S ABANDONING YOU!!!!! SHE'S GOING TO LEAVE FOREVER AND EVER AND SHE'S NEVER COMING BACK!!!!!

GRIM ACCEPTANCE: It's okay. We've prepared for this. She's left us a surplus of micro feed. If we ration this out correctly, we should have at least a full three days to find something wrong with the cage and escape. From there, we might be able to get to a neighbors house.

OBSESSIVE THRALL: ... but then Mommy is gonna be upset! If she wants us to starve in our cage, we should do that for her! Maybe she'll use her bones for pretty jewellry!

GRIM ACCEPTANCE: Hm. Admittedly, we would make very good jewelry. It's not out of the question. Do you think theres a certain pose she wants us to die in?

PETLIKE NAIVETY: TITS BETWEEN THE BARS TITS BETWEEN THE BARS TITS BETWEEN THE BARS!!!!!!!!!!

TIMID NATURE: She's staring. H- how long has she been staring? I don't understand her expression, what do we do?

2. Put your tits between the bars.

"Awww, sweetpea... no, I can't take you with me! I'm sorry dear, it might be best if you stayed home..." DAMAGED MORALE

GRIM ACCEPTANCE: Hm. We may have to plan an escape route. Is there a specific house any of you would like to run to?

PETLIKE NAIVETY: THE HOUSE THATS LEFT OF US HAS A RABBIT!!!!!!!! WE MIGHT GET TO STAY WITH IT!!!! AND IT'LL FUCK US AND MAKE LOTS OF WIDDLE RABBIT BABIES!!!!!!!!!

TIMID NATURE: B- but what if the owner likes the rabbit more than us! We can't be the second favorite!

FRUEDIAN INSTINCT: Ooooo!!! On the other side theres a really nice Mom! Mommy told us she was feeling lonely, maybe we could run to her!

OBSESSIVE THRALL: I would rather starve in this fucking cage than abandon Mommy. I swear to goddess, I will fling this body off of the table if you even THINK of abandoning her.

PETLIKE NAIVETY: UGGHHHHHH I HATE THIS!!!!!!!! CANT WE GO WITH HER?

OBSESSIVE THRALL: Mommy said no. It's final.

"Shit- so sorry baby, Mommy has to take a call real quick!"

3. Listen in on the call. [CHECK - SUCCESS]

"... oh... oh, of course! No, thats perfect! I mean, if you're available right- okay! I'll be right over!"

"Okay, so... I still can't take you with me, I'm sorry... but the nice lady next door said she wants to babysit you for a bit! You know, the nice, southern motherly girl? She's been a bit lonely lately, and would love the company! What do you say, can you be good for her?"

PETLIKE NAIVETY: YAYAYAAYYYYY YAY YAY BABYSITTING YAY YAY YAY NICE MOM YAY

FRUEDIAN INSTINCT: YAYAYAYAYAYAYYYYYY NICE MOM LADY YAYAY YAY YAY!!!!!

OBSESSIVE THRALL: PERMISSION TO HANG OUT WITH NICE LADY YAYAY YAY!!!!!

TIMID NATURE: ... w- what if she smells bad.....

OBSESSIVE THRALL: SMELLY SOUTHERN MOM LADY YAY YAY YAY!!!!!!!!!! MAKE SURE SHE KNOWS HOW GRATEFUL WE ARE!!!!!!

[BIG PERSON VOCABULARY - CHECK: FAILURE]

You manage something between a moan and a squeak. Mommy just giggles.

"Alright, we'll take you over right away. Be nice, okay? Treat her just like you would Mommy!"

[swordmaster-ouppygirl]

Rolls and stretchmarks and panties I'm slowly tearing out of

[hairydykecunt]

pov a leather dyke spots you crying & offers to breastfeed you for comfort. or something

[podcastwizard]

LIKES TO CHARGE REBLOGS TO CAST

[the-goddess-of-annoying]

you people aren't CASTING

[the-goddess-of-annoying]

NO

[figma-deactivated20161222]

[whosname]

[id. A twitter post by @/Bennieeexyz Jury duty letter came addressed to my cat. Not a mistake. "Felix Martinez" - that's his full name according to his vet records. My last name. His first name. Somehow he's a registered voter now. Called the county clerk. Me: My cat got summoned for jury duty. Clerk: Is the name correct on the summons? Me: Yes, but he's a cat. Clerk: Is Felix Martinez a legal resident of this county? Me: He's a legal cat. Clerk: Sir, if the name matches our records, he needs to appear or file an exemption. Me: He can't file anything. He has paws. Clerk: You can file on his behalf. Me: Under what exemption? There's no box for "is a cat." Clerk: (pause) Check "unable to serve due to medical reasons." Me: What's the medical reason? Clerk: He's a cat. Me: That's not a medical condition. Clerk: It is if it prevents him from serving. Sent in the form. Got rejected two weeks later. "Insufficient documentation. Please provide medical professional's statement." Took the letter to my vet. Me: I need you to write that my cat can't do jury duty. Vet: Why is your cat summoned for jury duty? Me: Excellent question. No good answer. Vet: This is the weirdest request I've gotten. Me: Can you just write that he's medically unfit to serve? Vet: On what grounds? Me: He's a cat. Vet: (started typing) "Patient is unable to serve due to species-related limitations including inability to speak, read, or comprehend legal proceedings." Me: Perfect. Sent it in. Got another rejection. "Summons is mandatory. Failure to appear will result in contempt of court." My roommate thought this was hilarious. Roommate: Felix is going to jail. Me: This is serious. Roommate: Bring him to court. See what happens. Decided that was actually the only option left. Day of jury duty, put Felix in his carrier. Brought the entire paper trail of rejection letters. Checked in at the courthouse. Clerk: Name? Me: Felix Martinez. Clerk: (looked at the cat carrier) Is that Felix? Me: Yes. Clerk: (long stare) He's a cat. Me: I've been saying that for six weeks. Clerk: Why didn't you file an exemption? Me: I filed three. All rejected. Showed her the letters. She read through them, expression shifting from confusion to disbelief. Clerk: Someone rejected the veterinary documentation? Me: Twice. Clerk: (called her supervisor over) You need to see this. Supervisor read everything. Looked at Felix. Looked at me. Supervisor: How did a cat get registered to vote? Me: You tell me. Supervisor: This is a data error. Me: Took you six weeks to figure that out. They dismissed Felix immediately. Apologized for the inconvenience. Supervisor: We'll remove him from the voter registry. Me: Appreciate it. Supervisor: (pause) Out of curiosity, how would he have voted? Me: Probably whatever party supports universal treats. Got a formal apology letter a week later and a voter registration card. For me this time. Apparently I wasn't registered, but my cat was. Roommate: Felix committed voter fraud. Me: Felix committed nothing. He's innocent. Roommate: That's what they all say. Felix is sleeping on the jury summons now. Fitting end to his legal career. end id]

[plus-size-aesthetics]

poundcake.princess