Another Aro and Ace Advice and Positivity Blog

On A Break From This Blog | Voidpunk is cool. Queer is a great identity. Header is by trans-nb-unity. Sometimes tumblr eats asks and sometimes I choose not to answer some which make me uncomfortable.

[aro-ace-and-proud]

honestly struggling not to unfollow most of the ace and aro blogs i follow at the moment because a) as time goes on i feel less and less connected to those labels (without my lack of attraction really changing at all) and b) it's a constant minefield of being reminded of the discourse.

i suspect this blog is gonna be fully dormant for a while, although you're welcome to still send asks if you want and i'll try and check on it occasionally. come say hi on my main for general shitposting if you want @yayroos

[gendercensus]

The 2026 Gender Census is now open!

[ survey.gendercensus.com ]

The 13th annual international gender census, collecting information about the language we use to refer to ourselves and each other, is now open until 13th August 2026.

It’s short and easy, for most participants it takes 5 minutes or less.

After the survey is closed I’ll process the results and publish a spreadsheet of the data and a report summarising the main findings. Then anyone can use them for academic or business purposes, self-advocacy, tracking the popularity of language over time, and just feeling like we’re part of a huge and diverse community.

If you think you might have friends and followers who’d be interested, please do reblog this blog post, and share the survey URL by email or at AFK social groups or on other social networks. Every share is extremely helpful!

Survey URL: https://survey.gendercensus.com

The survey is open to anyone anywhere who speaks English and feels that the gender binary doesn’t fully describe their experience of themselves and their gender(s) or lack thereof.

Thank you so much!

[ Link to survey ]

[gendercensus]

🎉 1,000!!! 🥳

And it's only been about 3 hours, and I haven't even done the mailing list email yet!

[77pink-prin-cess77]

Please don't forget about loveless people this pride month. Love doesn't make us human. People don't need to love in "other" ways to be valid. Some people are aplatonic, some afamilial, some asensual, some are heartless. They still belong. Abolish conformity and the idea that someone needs to be something specific to belong at pride.

[yayroos]

tumblr appears very much to be blocking me when i have my VPN enabled. if this remains the case, you probably won't see me back here very much.

come hang out on fedi where nobody is trying to advertise to you or harvest your data. I'm @[email protected] and you can see me from pretty much any instance listed on fedi.garden

[aro-ace-and-proud]

"I am not a robot" asserts the aroace pride post, the same kind of one that says aces can still have romance and aros can still have friends and conveniently ignores the complexities and intricacies of those things, and their absence is some corners of our community.

"I am not a robot" because I can still...

Sing? Dance? Pretend? Grow? Change?

None of those things are beyond the reach of a robot. At least not far enough out of reach that you couldn't be tricked, at least for a while.

"I am not a robot" because if I were you wouldn't have to care about my struggles. Because if I were I'd stop mattering. Because 'robot' and 'human' are somehow mutually exclusive.

Then ten minutes later we're talking about AI and would you let a truly intelligent robot vote and would it be possible for a robot to feel pain or joy or sadness. Yes you say, of course, if the robot met your criteria for being a human intelligence, of course it would have rights, of course you would care if it suffers.

Which criteria do I need to meet, to not be a robot in your eyes?

What if I was? What if I turned around tomorrow, opened up a hatch and showed you the wires. Showed you the hydraulic fluid spilling over the floor, and the cables and the tubes and the motors.

What if I opened you up and showed you those things that already live in you.

What if I spent countless hours building ever more complex simulations of a human body, getting every detail of every bone and muscle and every tube and wire.

"I am not a robot" is not for my sake, it is for yours, so you don't yet have to grapple with the idea that something that doesn't meet your definition of a human can still matter as much as one.

Did you know, 'not' is a boolean operator. It reverses whatever you feed into it.

not("I am a robot")

not(this.isRobot);

Maybe if I could talk to a person as easily as a machine I wouldn't need to justify this is much.

if("I can talk to people")

"I am not a robot"

if(this.canCommunicateWithPeople){

this.isRobot = false;

}

What if I'm not interested in your ideas of what makes someone a human? Certainly by a lot of standards I don't pass the test.

if("I give a shit what you think")

"I must be a robot"

else

"Does it matter?"

if(this.caresAboutYourOpinion"){

this.isRobot = true;

} else {

this.isRobot = null;

System.out.println("further querying of this value will result in an exception being thrown");

}

try {

if(this.isRobot) {

this.isHuman = false;

} else {

this.isHuman = true;

}

} catch (Exception e) {

this.isHuman = null;

System.out.println("Stop asking that question like it means something");

}

[my-life-is-a-bad-sitcom]

Hello!! October 26th is Intersex Awareness Day and I made a poster about it. Feel free to use, share, and print (but please follow canva’s guidelines). No credit or permission required! Link

(With a special thank you to @dhddmods for help with wording and accuracy)

[queenieofaces]

The 2025 Ace Community Survey is now open

It’s that time of year again – we are now recruiting participants for the Ace Community Survey! The Ace Community Survey is run by the Ace C

It's that time of year again!

[scutesketch]

YOUR ART ON TUMBLR IS BEING USED TO TRAIN AI!

The setting that prevents your work being used to train AI models is turned off by default! I had no idea about this until now! Artists, go to your settings, click “visibility”, and turn on this setting! Protect your work!

[portlandalites]

《Made a visual guide of how to get there, because it's under a weird tab.

Go to your blog (you have to do this for each individual blog) and the visibility tab

It's this last option here

Hate this shit, but turn it off babey》

[dabwax-deactivated20250410]

Started researching my paper on intersex medicalizarion for my comp final and found some fun data to share with the wider queer community while saying: start including us in your community and activism now, please. There were apparently 75 intersex queer participants and ~1400 perisex queer participants, just to get a feel.

Source:

New CAP data and analysis offer insights into the experiences of people with intersex traits.

The majority of intersex people are marginalized in several other ways, and we need your support, not your fear of exclusionists being mean to you for including us. We are queer and we are suffering badly.

[absurdty]

Oooh, I just thought of another question to ask this beautiful community. This will be separated into two polls;

-> please vote in both, even if you only identify as ace!

Asexual/Acespec folks - do you wear a black ring on your right middle finger?*

Yes, usually/as often as I can

Yes, sometimes

I used to but no longer do

No, but I am familiar with the practice

No, and I haven't heard of this before

I'm not asexual or acespec (and I am aromantic)

Aroallo button

Voting ended onAug 28, 2025

*NOT coincidentally! Specifically in reference to being asexual.

Vote in this poll too: Aromantic/Arospec folks - do you wear a white ring on your left middle finger?

[gendercensus]

The 2025 Gender Census is now open!

[ Link to survey ]

The 12th annual international gender census, collecting information about the language we use to refer to ourselves and each other, is now open until 30th August 2025.

It’s short and easy, for most participants it takes 5 minutes or less.

After the survey is closed I’ll process the results and publish a spreadsheet of the data and a report summarising the main findings. Then anyone can use them for academic or business purposes, self-advocacy, tracking the popularity of language over time, and just feeling like we’re part of a huge and diverse community.

If you think you might have friends and followers who’d be interested, please do reblog this blog post, and share the survey URL by email or at AFK social groups or on other social networks. Every share is extremely helpful!

Survey URL: https://survey.gendercensus.com

The survey is open to anyone anywhere who speaks English and feels that the gender binary doesn’t fully describe their experience of themselves and their gender(s) or lack thereof.

If you can't wait for survey numbers, you can click here for a public spreadsheet of non-secret info with graphs as it comes in, updated manually a few times per day.

Thank you so much!

[ Link to survey ]

[spoonbendersanonymous]

"Single people are on average less healthy, less financially stable, and overall less satisfied with life than partnered and married people are. This must mean that monogamous relationships and marriage are the solution to society's problems"

Huh, it's almost like society, both socially and financially, is set up to specifically benefit people who have monogamous relationships and get married and punish people who don't partner or get married. It's almost like there are financial benefits that exist specifically to incentivize people to get married and have kids and be a nuclear family. It's almost like it was very culturally normal until very very very recently to just not have any deeper platonic relationships after you get married, meaning that single people past a certain age just get left behind and get treated as spinsters or loser bachelors. It's like life just is not designed for single people to be able to easily participate and survive while still being single. Huh, very weird. I'm sure marriage will fix this.

[becomingsoup]

Well it's officially Aro Week (TM) which means there is now a $200 fine for saying things like "wtf that's not real" and "you'll meet the right one someday!"

[becomingsoup]

Actually due to inflation the fine is $400 this year. you're welcome

[aro-ace-and-proud]

thanks tumblr. love the 'you made one post to your sideblog so now we're gonna make that the default choice for everything

[papier-ciseaux]

Happy ASAW 2024, here's something about community !

[aromantic-aurea]

Image Description: At the top of the image, text reads: "Aromantic Belonging in the Queer Community". Just underneath is a wavy banner in aromantic flag colours (dark green, light green, white, grey, black). Below this is a dark green roughly-square shape reading "Looking for aromantic and aro-spec participants to take part in 60- to 90-minute online text-based interviews on your experiences of belonging as an aromantic person". To the bottom right of this is another, smaller banner in a loop-de-loop shape with colours of the aromantic flag. Further text at the bottom of the image reads "This research is being conducted as part of my Undergraduate Psychology Dissertation at the University of Glasgow. Please contact Alex Jacquemot-Krupp at [email protected] to register interest or find out more!". The image background is a colour gradient from white at the top to light green at the bottom.

[grubloved]

like people are just going to keep saying “theyre only queer because they want to be/because it gets them off/because they think it’s fun/because they saw a queer person and thought it sounded like a good idea/etc. theyre gonna keep saying it

and we are going to have to stop desperately scrambling to say noooo, they have to be like that, they have no choice, they wouldn’t be like this if they didnt have to. we HAVE to stop falling all over ourselves assuring straight people and transphobes that we hate being us as much as they hate us being us, that we are suffering and that’s why we deserve this decadence and deviancy. we HAVE to start saying “yeah ok and?”

being queer is a delight. deviant sex makes people really happy. being genderfucky is joyful. queerness CAN actually be an option you can choose, and that doesn’t make it worth less than if you only picked it with a gun to your head, because it is a good option and there are good reasons to pick it.