pairings: bf!Bang Chan x genderneutral!reader (chan calls reader "babygirl" once)
genre: fluff, smutty-ish
warnings: Chan is a walking green flag, bruises, heavy making out, implied oral (reader!rec) (sorry, I'm shit at these warnings)
word count: 0,4 k
songs to listen to while reading:
pvris - you and i (stripped)
stephen sanchez - please don't go home yet
coldplay - sparks
published: 2024/08/04
Chan hovered over you, holding himself up with one arm, the other gripping your waist firmly. His kisses were slow and deep, each one leaving imprints of the wrinkles on his lips on yours. Your hands wandered from his cheeks into his messy, curly hair and back.
You got lost in the feeling of him lying between your legs, his body heat warming up your arms and legs – that, and the anticipation of what was next to come. It was one of your favorite things on sunday mornings: sleep still evident in your mind, and the comforting feeling of him so close to you, moving together as one.
As you got more into it, his grip on your arms, chest and thighs got firmer. You could feel his erection getting harder on your upper thigh. His right hand moved downwards and found a tough grip on your thigh.
"Ouch" You yelped.
Chan was alerted, eyes open and hands off of your body. "Shit, are you okay? Did I hurt you?"
"No, it's fine, I just have a big bruise on my thigh, I don't remember how that got there."
Chan moved the blanket away to reveal your legs. His eyes widened even more. There were a bunch of big bruises on both of your legs, each about 5 centimeters in diameter. "What the hell, baby? What did you do?"
You pouted. "I told you, I don't know. You know I bruise like a peach. It literally could've been me putting on pants or something."
"I didn't know it was that bad." His eyebrows moved up in compassion. The back of his hand caressed your side. "Maybe you should get that checked out? I don't want you to be in pain, baby."
"It's fine, Channie. They only hurt a little bit. They're more annoying than anything."
"Well, I hope this is not gonna be annoying." He moved down a bit and started to kiss every single bruise that was visible. He took his sweet time with it. Each one felt like a warm little butterfly on your skin. He seemed to be mindful of his touch now.
He then moved up your body, kiss by kiss until he was on your lips again. "Promise me, you'll be more careful from now on, yeah?"
You nodded and smiled at him.
"Now, let me take care of you, babygirl." He guided himself down again to where you wanted him the most.
pairings: bf!SKZ member x genderneutral!reader
genre: soft fluff
warnings: sweathearts and lovebugs everywhere, reader wears a dress on Chan's, tiny hint of angst in Changbin's, blood in Jisung's
word count: 2 k
songs to listen to while reading:
patrick watson - je te laisserai des mots
hazlett - cemetery
noah kahan - orange juice
danandphilbeats - end screen (yes, I'm a phannie, sue me)
a/n: I'm deep in my skz feels, this new comeback is doing things to me. Also, yes, we're doing reverse age order cz we love our dudes Seungmo and Innie and I feel like they usually have a disadvantage, so enjoy.
Beautiful banners by @cafekitsune
Jeongin
"Honey, have you seen my wallet?"
You were reading on the couch, while Jeongin turned your whole apartment upside down.
A bookmark now in your novel, you got up. "Well, do you remember when you had it last?"
"Not sure, could've been today, could've been yesterday... I definitely had it when I went to get coffee with Hyunjin Hyung yesterday." He rummaged through the whole wardrobe, looking into every single bag he owned.
You slowly walked into your shared bedroom where you kept the laundry. "Ugh, where the hell did I leave it?" You heard from the hall.
After going through a bunch of dirty laundry, you finally found the pair of pants Jeongin had worn yesterday. You found his wallet in his left back pocket. Jackpot.
Calmly, you walked to your boyfriend who was now going through all of his coats. You waved his wallet in front of his eyes.
"Oh my god, where did you find it?" He exclaimed.
"In the pants you'd worn yesterday, genius." He took it out of your hands and pressed a short kiss on your lips.
"Thank you, honey."
"I love it, when you depend on me for everyday tasks." You looked at him with love in your eyes.
He seemed mock-offended. "I do not, I'm very capable."
"Sure, Innie. Whatever you say." This time, you got on your tippie toes to press a kiss on his forehead.
Seungmin
"You have a little... thing on your chin." Seungmin wiped some latte foam from your chin. Before he could take his hand away, your intrusive thoughts won and your mouth snapped after his fingers.
"Hey! You freak." He took his hand away quickly but smiled brightly.
"At least I'm your freak." You retorted and took his hand in yours, massaging it a bit with your fingers.
His nose scrunched up. "Ew, that was too cheesy, even for you."
"Don't act like you don't love it, Minnie." You fluttered your lashes at him, got up from your seat and kissed his cheek.
He seemed taken aback by that. His ears and cheeks turned bright red and he opened his mouth but closed it again after no words came out.
You were very pleased with yourself. "That's what I thought."
Felix
4 am and you woke up again. You'd had too much coffee yesterday but things at work were also stressing you out, making you unable too sleep through the night.
You reached your hand over to your boyfriend's side of the bed but it was empty. In the dark, you tried to look around for him, but couldn't see much. It was unlike him to leave in the middle of the night.
So, you got up to look for him. It didn't take long, there was a faint light coming from the kitchen.
You carefully opened the door. "Babe? Is everything okay?"
The bright light in the kitchen hurt your eyes at first. After a few moments you got used to it and saw Felix in front of the stove heating up some milk.
He looked at you. "Yeah, sorry, did I wake you?"
"No, the third cup of coffee yesterday woke me... But when I reached over, you weren't there." You pouted.
"Aw, baby, I'm sorry." He came over to you, put his arms around your waist and kissed your cheek a few times. "I didn't mean to scare you. I simply couldn't sleep either and wanted to make a something hot to drink... Do you also want a hot chocolate?"
You nodded your head, still pouting. You lifted yourself up to sit on the counter next to the stove, so you could watch Felix.
He put some sugar, a pinch of salt and some cocoa powder into the frothed milk. Then he got two mugs and poured the chocolatey goodness inside. It was calming to watch him do the tasks one after the other.
When he was done, he gave you one mug and smiled at you. "There you go."
"Thank you, baby." The hot chocolate was smooth amd warm in your mouth, melting away some of the worries that had kept you up.
Jisung
"Oh, Ji, how did this happen?" Jisung had come to your shared bedroom, where you were reading your book. He pouted and clutched his hand, where blood came pouring out of his finger.
"I just wanted to make some dinner for you... and then the knife a personal vendetta against me."
You inspected his cut. It didn't seem to be that deep but a lot of blood came out. "Hold you hand high, babe." You turned him around and directed him into the bathroom.
This happened more often than you wanted to admit, so you'd routinely slipped into nurse mode.
You sat your boyfriend down on the toilet and got out the band-aids. First you disinfected his wound when Jisung winced in pain.
"Please, keep still, baby."
He pouted even more. "You keep still the next time I pour alcohol over an open wound of yours..." Sometimes he really was just a kid in a grown-up's body.
You gave him an amused look but continued bandaging up his finger. "There you go."
Jisung inspected your work and seemed impressed when he pressed onto the injured finger with his index finger on the other hand. "Thank you, sweetie."
"No problem, but babe, as much as I enjoy being your personal nurse, this is the third time this week you've injured yourself. Please be more careful, okay? I still need you in one piece."
"I swear I'm not doing it on purpose... even though I kind of like when you care for me like that." He smiled cheekily and pulled you towards him.
You couldn't help but bend down do kiss him.
Hyunjin
"Sweetie, I love you but you're getting the steps wrong... You're stepping on my feet a lot."
"Oh what? I only heard that you love me, Hyunie... I love you too." You playfully fluttered your lashes at him.
It was a lazy Sunday afternoon when you admitted to your boyfriend that you've never danced with a partner. It always seemed so romantic to you, the both of you dressed up, at a fancy event and dancing with the one you love until you were the only ones left on the damce floor. A bit old-fashioned? Yes, but definitely cute as hell.
Your boyfriend being the dancer that he is, couldn't help but offer you a waltz lesson.
He was a great dancer, he was able to lead you well. You however... had some troubles. Your feet constantly got mixed up, you couldn't lift your gaze because you were scared of tripping.
You took another step on your boyfriend's feet before he let go of you.
"Okay, babe, let's try something else." He took his index finger underneath your chin and lifted your head up so you would look at him. "Just look at me for now."
His dark brown eyes always pulled you in. The shape of his eyes, nose and lips were perfect to you so you spent some time analysing every single aspect of his face.
He took one your hands in his again and put his other hand on your waist. "Just keep looking at me and go where I lead you sweetie."
At first it wasn't easy to not look at the ground, but the longer you moved, the easier it got to dance with Hyunjin. Whenever he took a step forward, you noticed and took a step back. Whenever you felt him lift your hand, you knew it was time for a turn.
After some time you noticed how it felt completely natural to move like this. "Hyunie, I think we're doing it." You couldn't hide the excitement in your voice.
"Oh yes, we're doing it... and we're doing it well." He lifted your hand as a sign for you to do another turn under his lead.
Hyunjin made you turn quite fast and about halfway through you lost your balance, tripping over your own feet.
Luckily, your boyfriend caught you in the most cheesy way by wrapping his arms around your waist. Otherwise you would've fallen on your back. Hyunjin lifted you up again. "Did you just fall for me?"
You scrunched your nose up in disgust. "You're lucky I love you, otherwise I would've kicked you in the shin by now."
"Oh what? I only heard that you love me" Mocking you, he also fluttered his eyelashes at you.
This idiot was yours and you wouldn't have him any other way. You put your hands on his face to pull him closer for a kiss.
Changbin
You two had decided to take a walk at midnight. Since you both couldn't sleep, why not get a bit of fresh air outside?
"Jisung tripped over some trash today when we were on our way to the fan sign. It was hilarious, I almost peed myself a little."
You chuckled a bit. "That sounds funny as hell. I wish I could've been there."
There it was again: that tiny black cloud of sadness that came into your mind these days whenever you felt like you couldn't spend as much time with your boyfriend as you wanted to.
Changbin seemed to notice as he took your hand in his warm one. "Well, that's why I'm telling you this stuff." He smiled at you.
His thoughtfulness touched you. You stopped walking to wrap one arm around his shoulders to pull him closer.
You looked him deep in the eyes before you kissed him slowly but deeply.
"I love you, Changbin."
His eyes half-closed as he smiled blissfully. "That's the best reaction to an almost-pee story I've ever gotten."
Minho
It was in the late evening. You were lying on the couch watching a really bad dating show on TV when Minho finally came home.
"Babe, I'm home."
"I'm on the couch."
You heard tired feet being dragged over the ground. He stopped in front of the couch closing his eyes for a second. Then, without warning, he let himself fall on top of you. It was not as gentle as it sounds. "Ow, babe, be careful."
"Sorry, I'm just so exhausted." His arms snaked around your tummy and he nuzzled his face between your neck and your shoulder.
You pat his hair. "It's okay, baby, you can relax now."
It wasn't often that Minho let his jokey, cool attitude slip away completely and just let himself be however he was feeling at the moment. But you loved those moments a lot. You enjoyed being with him whatever mood he was in.
"I love you." There was only a slight snoring in return.
Chan
On a recent thrifting trip, you'd found a beautiful A-Line dress. You were currently trying it on in front of your bedroom mirror. It had flowy sleeves that made you feel like a fairy.
"Woah... baby, look at you!" Chan stopped in the doorframe to your bedroom. He just looked at you with big eyes.
You tried to dismiss him with a wave of your hand but he wasn't done.
"You look absolutely gorgeous." He walked up behind you and put his hands around your tummy. He rested his chin on your right shoulder. His eyes were fixated on the mirror in front of you, admiring the view.
"I really like this dress too." You smiled, feeling happy about your recent find.
"No, I'm talking about you. How did I get so lucky?" He pressed a few kisses to the nape of your neck. The moment felt so gentle, you closed your eyes.
After a few moments you turned around and put your arms around Chan's neck, gazing into his eyes.
"Thank you." You stated.
He raised his eyebrows. "What for? I didn't do anything."
"For what you're doing everyday. Thank you for being the best boyfriend ever, single day." His eyes sparkled and he kissed you gently on the forehead.
pairing: bf!Changbin x female reader
genre: angsty angst with fluffy ending
warnings: body image issues (esp. regarding weight, hairiness, posture, sweatiness), mental health struggles, reader is a bit of an asshole, Changbin is a sweetheart
word count: 1,4 k
songs to listen to while reading:
palaye royale – don’t cry
enhypen – moonstruck
i prevail – doomed
ninety one – why’m
sleeping at last – you’re enough
a/n: to anyone who relates to these thoughts: I hope you find the courage to cultivate your own little Changbin in your head, who can fight those thoughts for you. Changbin is just my little safe place when it comes to body issues.
No, you were not gonna miss this train. You sprinted towards the closing doors, determined to make it to work on time. Just before the doors closed, you made it inside, the people around staring at you.
You found an empty seat and sat down, sweaty but feeling proud. As you took out your book you noticed you sat down opposite of an incredibly beautiful woman. It wasn’t so much her features that were pretty, it was more how everything about her seemed so incredibly well-proportioned. She also seemed to hold herself well, she definitely had good posture. Her shoulders were not drooping like yours often were. She also didn’t seem to sweat like you currently were.
A few years ago, you were deeply buried in your self-critical thoughts about your looks. Your mind didn’t need anything to attack every single thing about your body. ‘Your stomach is way too big’, ‘You’re way too hairy for anyone to be attracted to you’, ‘You should be ashamed of your weight’. Horrible stuff, day in, day out.
You’d worked long and hard to keep these thoughts and feelings in check. You knew there was no other way around it but to keep trying to be nice to yourself. Some days were easier than others. Today seemed to be a particularly tough day.
As soon as you looked at the woman opposite of you, all those thoughts you thought you had handled, came back rushing in without warning. ‘Look at her, she doesn’t look like a sweaty pig’, ‘You should suck in your stomach more, hers isn’t even visible’, ‘Sit up straight, you look awful’.
You were listening to every single thing your mind shot at you. You couldn’t seem to deal with them today and so you had no choice but to start believing all the horrible things again. They seemed true in that moment. You turned up the song on your headphones a bit more.
…
You’d made it to lunch, sitting next to a few colleagues, just chitchatting away. As you got up to get a second serving of the pasta bake, your coworker stated “A second serving, are you sure?”
She wasn’t a particularly good friend at work, but it was enough. It was enough to summon that dark cloud of thoughts again. ‘Nothing about you was or ever will be good enough’. She might as well have punched you in the stomach.
…
With enough distraction, panic about getting fired and more caffeine you’d made it through the work day. All you wanted to do now was get home, and lie down in front of your comfort show Gilmore Girls.
As soon as you shut your apartment door your bones seemed to get 37 kilograms heavier. You leaned against the door and took a deep breath.
“Honey?” His voice startled you. He poked his head around the corner. It was your Changbin.
“Hey baby… what are you doing here?”.
“Oh, I just went to the gym around the corner. By the time I was done I remembered this is usually the time you get home from work, I wanted to surprise you.” That smile, it melted away the tension in your forehead and shoulders. You got up to hug him. It was one of those hugs where you could let go, shifting almost all your weight on Changbin, who did his best to hold you together.
“Are you okay, honey?”
You didn’t feel like you could verbally express everything that was going on in your brain. “Yeah, of course”
He softly let go of your hug. “Then how about some dinner?”
“Uh, I’m not really hungry right now”
“Are you sure? You’ve worked all day”
You were getting more and more irritated the more he questioned you. “Yes, Changbin, I am sure. I am not hungry.”
He took a step back and put his palms up in defense. “Okay, okay… I’m just worried about you… You sure everything’s alright?”
A small grunt left your lips. “Yes, and I don’t want to be questioned anymore. Please just leave me alone” Your voice sounded louder than you intended.
And there it was: the hurt on his face. It wasn’t too obvious but you could read him. And he could probably read you. Which is not at all what you wanted right now.
“I need to leave.” You hadn’t taken off your shoes when you got home so you just opened the door.
“No, Y/N please talk to-” But you already shut the door on him before he could finish his sentence.
After a few steps you stopped for a beat to hear if he would come after you, but he didn’t. He knew you too well to assume you wanted to talk in a situation like this.
Of course, you knew you were behaving like an asshole. He didn’t deserve your bitchiness but it was all too much in your brain today. The thoughts, the anxiety, the depression, it all weighed too heavy on your shoulders today. Why was he even still with you?
You’d talked to him about your mental health struggles in the past, and he was always trying his best to ease the struggle. But every few weeks you started believing in the thoughts again and they were telling you to isolate yourself. Changbin didn’t love those parts of you anyways, so you deserved to be alone.
That got you thinking: Changbin sometimes had rolls on his stomach, he got sweaty at times. But that didn’t make you love him any less. You loved him for him, not because of what he looked like or didn’t look like. He made you feel safe and home.
There was a tiny voice on your head that said maybe, just maybe that was also the case for him. He never gave you much reason to doubt his love for you. So, what were you doing consciously sabotaging your relationship? Why were you walking around alone at night, instead of confiding in your best friend and boyfriend? How stupid of you.
It took you a good few minutes to find the way back to your apartment. In your emotional state you just walked wherever without looking about where you were going.
Eventually you made it back. You realized you didn’t know what to say to Changbin.
Before you could worry further, your apartment door swung open and Changbin stood right in front of you. He looked relieved. “Oh, thank god, honey, you’re here.” He engulfed you in a tight hug and lifted you off the ground. “I was gonna give you 15 minutes before going after you but I got too worried” He squeezed you a bit tighter.
“I’m sorry, Changbin, my thoughts are too much for me today.” Your voice was a whisper.
He let go of you to look at you. His eyebrows were raised and eyes big. “Will you tell me what’s going on in there right now?”
You nodded. It was time.
He took your hand and pulled you inside, on the couch.
After you somehow explained to him what’s been going on in your mind, you felt extremely tired but a lot lighter. A few tears fell down your cheeks while you were talking. Changbin listened closely the entire time.
“Y/N, please promise me, that the next time you notice these thoughts, you immediately text me. What you’re thinking isn’t the reality, not even close. I love you, and I love all of you, no matter what you look like. What you look like isn’t what makes you worthy, it’s being yourself. And I think you’re pretty amazing… and I am of course very objective in saying that so you can believe me… it’s based on scientific evidence.”
There it was, his stupid sense of humor you loved so much. Even in a situation like this he managed to make you smile without much effort.
“Oh really? I’d like to see this evidence someday, please?”
“Uh yeah sure, but I need to do one thing first…” He inched closer to your face eyes scanning your face. Then he gently kissed you, his hands holding your cheeks like you were a precious gemstone.
Can u do a non idol strangers to lovers scenario for san or seonghwa (or honestly whoever u want) pls🤠❤️
And also dont listen to ur boss ur writing is amazing
A painful meet-cute
Pairings: non-idol!San x genderneutral reader
Warnings: reader getting hurt by accident, blood, medication, San being a slight asshole in the beginning
Word count: 1,4k
Songs to listen to while reading:
cxlt., nuver – rays of light
gibran alcocer – idea 22 (sped up)
amistat – keep your head up
pvris – anywhere but here
the native - time
It was still light out, when you left the office at 8 pm. The sun had been shining all day, so the air was warm, a light breeze dancing through the streets. Some would say it was the perfect summer day.
You had a very stressful day at work, rushing from one meeting to the next. You barely had time for a bathroom break or getting something to drink. It seemed every single coworker had a task for you. Needless to say, you felt drained and in dire need of some food and relaxation.
As you slowly dragged your feet towards the train station, people passed you by, most of them smiling and talking to their friends. What were they so happy about? For you, life recently was simply getting ready for work, working, or getting home from work. These people however seemed to just be enjoying the nice summer evening.
Maybe that was the problem, maybe you should do things again outside of work, that made you enjoy life again. As you boarded the train you couldn’t think of anything that you wanted to do, so you decided to just take a walk along the river. That used to calm you down a few years ago.
Watching the blueish-greyish body of water helped you relax a lot in a short period of time. You watched couples having picknicks on the grass, people taking their dogs for walks, some were even working out. As you walked along the river you racked your brain for activities you used to enjoy: Reading, going to cute cafes, dancing, meeting friends for boba. All of it lost its appeal when you thought about doing it. You hadn’t realized how grey and dull your life had become.
It was time to make a change. But how could you go about it, when work took up such a big part of your day?
You didn’t have time to ponder any longer, as a strong force suddenly knocked you down, making you fall over, face first. You were so surprised, you didn’t have time to stop the fall. Next thing you knew your nose was being squished on the ground. A throbbing pain started to spread from the center of your face.
“Ow, fuck” You tried to lift yourself up into a seated position.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry, are you okay?” When you looked up to where the voice came from, you were met with dark, wide-open eyes. The person was wearing a hat and a black mask.
“Obviously not, idiot, watch where you’re going, man” You felt hot liquid running down your face. Of course this had to happen to you. Perfect end to the perfect day.
“I’m really really sorry, my friend and I were trying to see who could run faster, and I totally didn’t see you… Shit, your nose is really bleeding”. The guy reached his hand out to you.
With one motion you slapped his hand away. “No need, I can take care of myself”
You got up, careful not to let any blood drop onto your shirt and got a tissue out of your bag. You pressed it into your nostrils. The tissue was full of blood, when you looked at it.
“Listen, I again am so sorry, for running into you like that, but I’m kind of in a hurry, will you be okay?” You picked up genuine regret from the tone of their voice, you couldn’t believe the audacity though. “Ugh, whatever, just go back to where you came from.” And he did.
For the first time, you lifted your gaze to see who the person was. He looked like a modern day ninja, wearing black workout clothes under baggy shorts. There was no telling who he was, as he was already turned away from you and about 20 feet in front of you. He had a broad back though, you had to give him that. Why were all hot people jerks?
…
The next day, you went to the doctor to get your nose checked. It was still throbbing and you were in pain. It turned out to be only a bruise and you should be fine in a few weeks. The doctor gave you a prescription for some pain killers. When you went to the pharmacy to get them, there was a long line of people in front of you. Great, as if you hadn’t already suffered enough.
Alas, you stood in the queue as there was nothing else to do. You scrolled through Instagram for a while. Somehow you were getting a lot of depressed but relatable millennial content on your feed. Times like these really made you scared if social media apps could somehow read your thoughts. No, don’t keep thinking about that brain, can’t go into full existential crisis mode.
Finally, it was your turn to talk to the pharmacist and you handed her your prescription. She looked at it for a while and pressed a few keys on her keyboard. Then she turned to look at you. “I’m really sorry, but it seemed we currently don’t have the exact ones you’ve been prescribed. Can I get you different ones? They’re not as strong as the original ones, but we currently don’t have any other pain killers.”
After you paid for your lower level pain killers you rushed to get out of there. What you didn’t expect was the tall man standing right around the corner, deeply immersed in his phone. You almost ran into him, but were able to stop before anything bad happened. He, however dropped his phone and a little box in surprise.
“Oh sorry, I didn’t see you there” As you apologized, you looked him in the eyes. Those eyes seemed kind of familiar. Yeah, you had seen them before. It took a second before you realized that those were the eyes of the person who ran into you last night. “It’s you…”
Before you could think of what to say, your phone started ringing. You rushed to pick up the call, it was your boss. “Hello? Is everything alright?” Your boss told you that there had been a series of emergency e-mails being sent to your whole department by one of your most important clients. They couldn’t reach you but had an ‘urgent matter’ to discuss with you. And apparently an ‘urgent matter’ couldn’t wait another hour for you to get back from your doctor’s appointment.
You groaned as you hung up. The mystery man, you almost ran into a few moments ago, was gone. You looked around for him, but found only the little box on the floor he had dropped earlier. It was the exact brand of pain killers your doctor had prescribed you.
…
A little sweet treat after dinner was a non-negotiable to you. So while you browsed the candy isle at the nearest convenience store, you couldn’t decide on just one treat. With your basket of sugary heaven you made your way to the cashier. There was only one person in front of you.
“Oh no, I think I left my wallet and card at home” You heard the person in front of you say.
“Well, then how do you intend to pay?” The cashier person retorted. There were just two vitamin drinks on the scanning table.
You immediately felt sorry for him. You had once been in that situation and it was so awkward and uncomfortable. Back then no one helped you and you were forced to return your items, leaving you with no sweet treat after a hard day’s work.
“I’ll pay for that.” You moved to the front, putting your stuff on the table for the cashier to scan. You noticed the person in front of you staring at you and your enormous amount of candy. You couldn’t care less though, seeing as they were depended on you in this situation. After paying, you put your yield in your bag and made your way towards the exit.
“Thank you, you didn’t have to do that” It was the guy for whom you had just paid for.
“Oh, don’t mention it, I was in that same situation a few weeks ago and no one was there to help me so I was happy to help.”
It was only after you both had exited the store that you looked at him properly. You saw the same broad shoulders, same dark eyes, same black mask on his face. “It’s you again?...”
“Hey, I’m San” He pulled down his face mask, giving you a smile, that sent waves of warmth through your entire body.
I haven't written anything on this blog in a year, and haven't uploaded a lot since 2020 but I want to get back into it.
Since I last uploaded, I got a job in writing & project management and apparently everything i write at work is bad, according to my boss. So I want to reclaim it for myself by writing these delulu little scenarios.
However, I feel like my creativity has died. That's why I need your help.
Please feel free to request any ATEEZ, Stray Kids, or SEVENTEEN reactions, imagines, scenarios etc. since i can't think of anything lol. (I don't write smut, sorry you valid nasties)
Thanks! (I'm still a lazy little shit so don't expect uploads too soon)
omg hi if you like seventeen/listen to seventeen casually etc please rb this post this isn't a great statistical survey but just a general idea to see how big caratblr is 😭
Angsty cz I'm in my svt delulu era, don't judge me
Pairings: each svt performance unit member x genderneutral reader (established relationship)
other units soon to come, 13 people is a lot
Warnings: angsty themes, walking around at night, arguments, fluffy endings though
Word count: 2,2 K
Songs to listen to while reading:
theory of a deadman – say nothing
lewis capaldi - before you go
taylor swift, bon iver - exile
jessie murph - pray
kyu - sanctuary
Jun
It wasn't rare that you and Jun had a quarrel but they never seemed to get quite as rough as this one. You both said things you didn't mean but knew would hurt the other person in the moment. After Jun raised his voice a bit, he realized it had gone too far, so he excused himself. Grabbing his coat, he was out of the apartment in no time. He wasn't able to look you in the eyes.
While taking a walk outside, he thought it all over. How it was nonsense that you two were fighting like this, over a thing that wasn't even worth mentioning. He'd never raised his voice in a argument with a partner before but you knew him too well, knew what to say to push his buttons.
It was dark outside and cars and street lights were illuminating the roads. Jun took his time because he wanted to sort this out with you with a clear head. He loved you after all and he wasn't willing to lose you over something so arbitrary.
After walking a few blocks his heart rate had calmed down, the heat in his head had faded and his forehead relaxed again. He knew it was time to go home.
He figured you were probably still awake but didn't know what state you were in, so he didn't want to startle you. He slowly opened the door.
"Y/N?"
There was no response.
Jun closed the door behind him and took off his shoes and jacket. All the lights were off, so maybe you had gone to bed after all?
"Y/N? Honey?" Still no response. Making his way into your living room, he saw a slight glint coming from the couch. You were sitting with your big headphones on, eyes closed. The TV showed you had paused a show and it was the only source of light in the room. Jun could hear the beats and melody coming from your headphones - you were listening to 'I don't understand but i luv you'.
After a few moments of watching you being so lost in the music, he approached you and carefully put his hand on your shoulder. You startled visibly, the headphones falling off your head.
"Jun?"
Even though it was dark he could tell you had been crying from your glistening eyes.
"I'm so sorry, Y/N, I shouldn't have raised my voice like that... I didn't mean what I said-"
He was interrupted by your hands on his cheeks, pulling his head towards your own. You kissed him.
After a few moments you pulled away.
"It's alright, Junie. I might not understand why we fought but I know that I love you... I love you so much."
There was a small smile on his lips, he realized he scored the jackpot with you.
"I love you too, Y/N" He took your hand in his.
Hoshi
Soonyoung tends to get a little agitated and hyperactive whenever he gets passionate, in a good and bad way. He knew that. And he thought you knew that.
This time though, it made you physically distance yourself from him a little. The argument you had was meaningless and pulled out of thin air. But for some reason, Soonyoung couldn't let it go. He was gesturingly wildly, raising his voice, trying to make you understand and explain his side.
"I can't argue with you like this anymore, Soonyoung... It's too exhausting."
For the first time he noticed the tired look in your eyes. Have you not been sleeping well?
"I'm sorry, Y/N... I'm sorry I'm exhausting."
"No, babe, that's not what I meant, it's not you, it's- ugh- I don't know- it's... I need to get some air." Before he could comprehend what was happening you had grabbed your coat and left the apartment.
"Wait, Y/N, it's dark outside, it's not safe! Please wait!" But the only sound that could be heard was the front door closing again.
He couldn't let you go out on your own at night. What if something happened to you? What if there were shady people out there? Within a minute he put his phone in his pocket, threw on his shoes and ran out the door to go after you.
...
Even though he was fast, Soonyoung couldn't immediately find you after leaving the house. That really scared him.
When he stepped out on to the street, he noticed a group of guys standing around a few buildings down. They yelled and bellowed, some were drinking beer. It seemed like they were all gathered around another smaller person who was standing in the middle. For a secound it seemed like the person in the middle was you. Soonyoung felt a shiver go down his spine. Even though they were bigger than him physically, Soonyoung approached the group. There was no way he'd let anything happen to you.
"Y/N?" With fast strides he made his way over to the group of guys. The closer he got, the more it looked like you being taunted by a bunch of big drunk guys. Soonyoung ran to where he thought you were.
"Y/N?! ... Hey! Stop, what are you doing to them?" He pushed some of the men away to get to you. That's when he saw, that it wasn't really you. It was another guy, long-haired, and he seemed fine. They were just playing a game, it looked like.
"Hey, what's your problem, man?"
Soonyoung was confused. "Oh, sorry, it seemed like- I was just looking for my partner."
The man right next to him looked at Soonyoung sceptically. "Get lost, weirdo."
Soonyoung retracted and went back into the direction of your house. Where could you have gone off to?
Soonyoung looked for you in every alley around your house, before he made his way back to the entrance of your house. When he opened the front door, he saw that the light in the backyard was on. Could it be...?
He opened the back door and there you were, sitting on the grass, a fluffy stray cat roaming around your feet.
"Y/N?"
"Hi, baby" You smiled when you saw him.
"Are you trying to kill me? Leaving like that? I looked for you all over, I was so worried." He plopped down onto the grass next to you. The cat inspected his shoes.
"I'm sorry, I couldn't think straight, I needed some fresh air... I'm really sorry, Soonie" You reached for his hand.
He let out a big sigh before putting his arms around you. "It's alright... But don't ever think about doing that again... I almost beat up a group of men out there because I thought you were being harassed by them."
You shot him an "are you sure about that"-look but he just cradled your head further into his chest.
"I'm just glad you're safe. And I'm sorry for how I acted earlier."
"It's okay, Soonie... I love you."
"Love you too, baby." He pressed a kiss to your forehead.
Minghao
No matter how hard he tries to be composed and balanced, Minghao has an inner child like everyone. And in this particular fight with you, little Hao felt hurt by some things you said. So he said the one thing he knew would hurt you.
Minghao immediately regretted it but he was too overwhelmed to say anything.
"Get out" you said.
He wasn't sure if he heard you right.
"I said get out. I can't look at you right now."
Minghao was confused, he didn't think the fight was that serious. How did it escalate like that? After a few moments of gathering his thoughts, he slowly turned towards the front door.
"I'll be at the dorm, when you're ready..." His voice was only a whisper but he turned around again to look you in the eyes.
"I'm sorry, Y/N..." He didn't want you to reject him further which is why he grabbed his coat and phone and left.
...
When he arrived at the svt dorm, a few of the guys were there but he didn't feel like talking so he made his way to his room and closed the door.
He let himself fall onto the bed face first. Why couldn't he have just apologized to you properly? It wasn't that hard. He usually had no problem doing it.
His thoughts were still spinning when someone knocked on his door.
"Who is it?" Minghao really didn't feel like socializing at the moment, his voice severely muffled by the pillow he was laying on top of.
"It's Hoshi" He didn't even wait for Minghao's answer and jsut entered the room.
"Are you okay, buddy?" Hoshi sounded genuinely concerned.
Minghao finally turned around to face his older friend. "We had a fight... and it was stupid and we both got mad and I said things I didn't mean and then they told me to get out and so I did."
Hoshi took a seat on the bed. "That doesn't sound like you guys... Did you apologize? You know you can be a bit petty sometimes."
"Thanks, hyung, that's just what I needed."
"You know what I meant. Is a little argument really worth being in a bad mood for? And I can guarantee you, Y/N is also not feeling too great about this."
"I guess you're right... Maybe I should call them to apologize."
"We're about to start playing some drinking games in the living room, if you need me."
And with that, Hoshi withdrew from Minghao's room. He tried to remember the last time, his hyung seemed so compassionate but couldn't recall.
Minghao took out his phone and pressed the call button next to your number.
"Hao?"
"Hi baby... Y/N, I'm so sorry for what I've said earlier. I didn't mean any of it."
"So, you're not sorry?" Your voice sounded a bit amused.
"No, that part's true... I never meant of it to become this big thing and I'm sorry... Can I come home so we can talk about it? I miss you."
"Yeah... I miss you too, Hao. Please hurry."
And that he did.
Dino
You two didn't usually go to bed not having resolved an issue but this time it just kinda happened. You were both too tired to talk rationally and he had an early morning call time.
Dino knew he wasn't gonna let you sleep alone in your shared bed but he didn't have the guts to cuddle you yet. He didn't wanna leave you alone, yet he wanted to give you some space. After a while of going over the argument in his head and coming to the same conclusion - that he loved you nonetheless and he didn't want to continue fighting - his eyelids felt impossibly heavy and he fell into an exhausted sleep.
...
Dino was dragged out of his deep sleep by his alarm. He hurried to make it stop, worried it had woken you up as well. When he looked over to you, it seemed like it didn't disturb your slumber. As he looked at your sleeping figure, his gaze wandered around your face, your cute cheeks, your pretty nose, your kissable lips. Your whole face seemed so peaceful, so relaxed. It immediately made him feel more peaceful too.
After a few moments he snapped back to reality, he had a job to get to after all. He was gonna send you a good morning text from the car to promise that you'll talk it over when he got home that evening.
Right as Dino got up from your shared bed, he felt your warm fingers grab his wrist.
"Please, don't leave me"
Your sleepy voice almost broke his heart. Dino wasn't sure if you were fully awake yet since your position hadn't changed and your eyes were still closed.
He decided to cuddle up to you for a moment, your head underneath his chin, so he could really hold you close.
"I will never leave you, Y/N, you hear me? I will not, I will never." He whispered it into your hair.
You must've heard him since you cuddled even further into him. Dino pressed a short kiss on top of your head.
He didn't even care that his phone rang 3 times. So what if he was a little late for once? His hyungs were late all the time. You were more important to him right now.
Pairings: each skz member x genderneutral reader (established relationship)
Warnings: food talk, mentions of knife cz cooking, slightly suggestive
Word count: 1.9K
Songs, that convey the feeling I was going for:
milk. – you're so
dvwn– fairy
someone, benjamin longman - true love will find you in the end
khalid - saturday nights
*~Chan~*
He was totally enamored with you. The fact that you were able to cook generally, making a meal from scratch with just some time, a few ingredients and your pretty hands.
As your were chopping up some veggies, he came up behind you, hugging your waist and laying his head on your shoulder.
"Channie, i love you, but are you sure you wanna do this while I'm holding a very sharp knife?" He immediately let go to pout a little.
"I can't help it, baby, I'm so in love with you"
"Is that just your stomach talking?" You chuckled at him as he leaned against the counter.
He playfully gasped. "I'm offended".
You turned your attention back to the carrots that needed chopping, the pan was already heating up on the stove.
"Oh, I'll show you that it's not just my tummy that's in love with you" He stated.
He carefully took the knife out of your hand. Swiftly, he grabbed your hips to press you against the counter.
Before you could protest he connected his lips with yours in a hungry (quite literally) passionate kiss. His soft lips moved slowly against yours, tongue making its way into your mouth. You could feel his grip on your waist tightening.
Suddenly his belly started grumbling, sounding like a beast that started roaring. You both stopped all movements, eyes wide open. After a second you broke away in laughter.
"Yeah, how about I help you cook, baby?"
*~Minho~*
"Jagi, you're not doing it right" He tried to take the whisk out of your hand but your grip on it tightened, not wanting him to take over. Ever since he came into the kitchen his only mission was to throw you off your cooking game, cause he wanted to see you flustered and blushed.
Not today, Minho, not today.
You were determined to make a delicious meal for your boyfriend since he rarely even had the time to sit down to eat.
"No, babe, I can do it. You can just relax, it'll be done in a minute." With that you turned your attention back to the sauce.
All of a sudden, his hand smacked your right butt cheek, making you jump a little. "Minho!"
Anither hand landed on your left butt cheek. "Whaat, honey?" He shot you the most innocent looking smile.
"I can't cook like this, you're distracting me too much." You half-whined, not wanting to spoil the only evening he had off this week.
"Well, then how about you take a short break?" He spun you around to look at him, his hands finding their place in the back pockets of your jeans again. He easily pulled you closer, working to connect your lips.
His hands made their way up to your waist, while his warm lips moved against your own in a slow rhythm.
*~Changbin~*
My god, was he excited. After you told him in the morning, he could expect a homemade dinner made by you, his true love, in the evening, he sent you texts almost hourly, asking you if he should bring something, help with something oder just praising you for doing this.
You got off early from work, picked up a shit ton of groceries and got to cooking.
When Changbin arrived home, he dropped all his bags and almost came running to you. "I'm so excited, baby. Can I do something, do you need something washed? Should I lay the table, what can I do?" He really was just an excited puppy, always wanting to help.
He continued to ask you, if you need help about 79 more times. After you reassured him you were fine and he could just keep you company, he gave you a tight back hug and wouldn't let go. He pressed a few kisses to the back of your neck. You couldn't really move in his grip, it was so tight.
"Binie, I think the sauce is about to boil over, can I-"
With one move he turned off the stove, without letting you go.
You turned around to give him a proper hug. "Aw, my Binie, you're so cute. Who knew it was that easy to make you happy." You moved your hand through his curly hair. Finally you embraced both his cheeks and pulled his face close. "I love you"
A small smile spread across his lips, finally closing the distance and kissing you properly.
*~Hyunjin~*
This one was completely mesmerized by your movements. Grabbing different vegetables, washing them, placing them on a cutting board and finally dissecting them with your knife, however you needed them.
You've done this about a hundred times, cooking being a hobby of yours. However it felt more special knowing you did it for your boyfriend and realizing he watched your every move so intently.
When everything was prepped and on the stove/ in the oven you slowly made your way over to Hyunjin. His lips were slightly parted, still being hypnotized with your movements.
You took his hands into yours and looked up to him sweetly. "Are you doing okay, Hyunjinie?"
"Do you even know how wonderful you are?"
"When you look at me like that, I think I'm getting an idea" You replied cheekily.
He smiled into the kiss that followed. Feeling his warm hands on your cheeks, you both got into it quite quickly, tongues meeting in the middle. A slow moan escaped your lips, after breaking away for a short moment to catch some air. The expression in your eyes was slightly dazed.
"Alrgiht, when's the food ready, I'm starving." Hyunjin exclamied, like he wasn't just exploring the inside of your mouth with his tongue a minute ago.
*~Han~*
"Oh my god, you're amazing for doing this! My baby is cooking for me!" He exclaimed after you told him what you were doing bringing four grocery bags into the kitchen.
After some begging you allowed him to help you chop some peppers. He was however a bit to eager with helping, talking all the time.
"Ow shit" you looked over to him and saw blood on the cutting board. He accidentally cut his finger.
"Oh no, Sungie, here hold it under the water, I'll get some bandages."
When you came back he was sitting on a chair pouting, making the biggest quokka eyes at you. You looked at him with worry.
"It hurts" Holding up his bloody finger, he explained.
It couldn't however been that bad because when you went to bandage up his finger he insisted on pulling you onto his lap, placing his hands on your booty cheeks.
When you were sitting on his lap, concentrated on cleaning up his wound, he gazed into your eyes with so much fondness, it made you flustered as soon as you realized.
He looked straight into your eyes and opened his mouth a bit, almost like he wanted to say something. But he didn't.
"What is it, Sungie? You're making me blush" you admitted uncomfortably.
"I just love you so much, i can't believe it... oh, and i love doing this." And with that he placed a short but sweet kiss onto your nose.
After seeing you all flustered and cute, he placed another one on your forehead. Making you blush an even deeper shade of red, he continued his kiss attack on your cheeks, chin and finally lips. You both sank into the kiss, like slipping under the covers after a long and intense day.
*~Felix~*
"I didn't know you could cook?! Like actually cook well? Why did you never mention it before, Y/N?" Felix stood in the door to the kitchen where you were currently putting the finishing touches on your homemade ramen, that you made especially for his evening off work.
"There's a lot you don't know about me, Yongbok" With that you presented him with two picture-perfect, steaming bowls of ramen. You gave him a cheeky grin. His jaw dropped.
"Woah, how did you- why, when have you... what did I do to deserve you?" He smiled so widely, eyes sparkling with adoration.
"Remember how hard you worked for the last comeback? That's your reward, I think" You jokingly replied.
He took one bowl from your hand, inspecting the boiled eggs, curly noodles, soft tofu pieces, seaweed and toppings you added.
As you both sat down and started to eat, his eyes almost popped out of their sockets.
"Oh my god, Y/N, that is delicious"
A smile crept onto your lips. "I'm glad you like it, my love"
Now it was his turn to smile fondly before leaning over the table to kiss you sweetly.
*~Seungmin~*
"What are you making me?" He playfully stuck out his tongue a little.
"I'm trying to recreate the creamy pasta you liked so much the other day when we were at that restaurant, Minie" You wanted to do something nice for your boyfriend since he's had a really stressful work week. You researched a few recipes, combined the parts you thought would work best and got to cooking: putting pasta water in a pot, chopping up garlic, spring onions and a zucchini.
Seungmin leaned against the counter for a while, just quietly observing you, lips slightly curled upwards.
You tried to do everything according to the recipes, which is why after a while Seungmin started to scroll through his phone. Every once in a while he showed you a funny tiktok to keep you company though.
"Do you want me to help you with anything, sweetie?" He must've gotten a bit bored because you were taking a while, measuring the ingredients for the sauce.
"Yeah actually, could you make the salad?" You were currently hands deep in your creamy pasta sauce.
"Uhh, I'm not sure how to do that... you're gonna have to give me instructions." He looked like a little lost puppy, eyes big, wide straight smile, you know the one.
He looked so endearing, you couldn't help but press a short kiss on the corner of his lips. "Of course, Minie"
*~I.N~*
"Y/N?" You heard your boyfriend's voice yell through your apartment.
"In the kitchen, bub" You answer-yelled. Having both hands in a dough didn't leave you with many other choices.
You'd decided to test out your somewhat decent cooking skills by trying a new, very challenging recipe for dumplings with Jeongin's favorite filling.
"Wow, what are you doing, babe?"
"I'm trying to make a dough for dumplings but it doesn't want to come together" You pouted in the direction of your hands.
Jeongin raised his eyebrows moving closer to inspect the dough. "Are you sure, you're not trying to poison me with that?"
You gasped in shock, grabbing a piece of dough and throwing it at him. He tried to cover his face, starting to laugh.
"Ok, ok, I'm sorry, Y/N sweetie" Holding both hands up, signaling a truce, he moved to stand behind you and pressed a short kiss on your hair.
"I feel like it just needs some more water" He suggested. "Here let me help." His hands suddenly appeared next to yours from behind, trying to help with the kneading. He pressed a short his on the back of your neck every once in a while. After a few moments and with Jeongin's help, the dumpling dough came together well.
Pairing: boyfriend!chan x f!reader (use of babygirl cz it's chan)
Genre: hurt/comfort, angst, fluff
Warning: exhausting job, tears
I'm in my Chan brain rot era, you're welcome
It's been a horrible day at work. No time to breathe, new projects and campaigns were thrown at you left, right and center. You didn't even have time to eat lunch, and that's saying something. So when you opened the door to your shared apartment with Chan, exhaustion hit you like a brick and your knees gave out slowly, making you slide down the closed front door.
"Baby?" Your boyfriend called through the apartment.
But you were too exhausted and overwhelmed to respond. So you stood sat there, hands hiding your face.
Until you felt a warm hand on your upper arm.
"Babygirl, what's wrong, are you okay?" The worry was obvious in Chan's voice.
The only thing you could do was shake your head no. The stress of all the responsibility at work weighing heavy on your shoulders. A few tears ran down your face.
Next thing you knew, Chan put his hands on your cheeks to lift your head and put his forehead on yours. He looked deep into your eyes. For the first time today you felt understood without either of you saying a word. Chan softly moved his thumbs across your cheeks.
"I think you need some cuddles" And with that he scooped you up on his arms bridal style and carried you to the couch. He turned around to let himself plop onto it first, so you'd fall onto him and he could engulf you in a big warm hug.
As you were lying on top of him you could hear his heart beat steady. It was something you could focus your breatjing on. The warmth from his skin started to melt away the stress and worry on your face.
You started to feel very sleepy after a few minutes but you didnt fight it. Chan was there, he was there to protect you, always.
As you drifted off to sleep Chan pressed a short kiss on your forehead.
how the boys act when you are experiencing depression/depressive symptoms
warnings: stray kids x gender neutral reader, depression/mental health, mentions of food
genre: hurt/comfort
word count: < 3k
a/n: for my love @ moonacholy. i love you baby :( feel better real soon, okay? also this is a broad spectrum of depression symptoms, nothing too extreme! mostly comfort than anything else.
chan
you don’t move as you hear the front door open and close; the thought of shifting from your curled up form on the couch sounded more exhausting than it was worth. you normally loved greeting chan at the door, loved kissing him hello and dragging him to bed when he gets home late but you can’t unglue your limbs from one another enough to even sit up, let alone walk all the way to the door.
your eyes drift to the clock on the wall as you take in the time and realize that you should have already been in bed hours ago. you never wait up for chan when he gets home past midnight, and yet you are wide awake at 3 in the morning, having laid here since noon after he left to go to the studio. your phone lays dead on the table in front of you, untouched for hours, and you just now notice how tired your eyes feel.
“sweetheart?” chan’s voice floats to your ears, loosening your tightened muscles a bit. chan’s here now, he can take care of you, your tired brain supplies. you hum as he approaches, closing your eyes when his hand runs through your hair and whimpering softly when it leaves. the couch dips by your head as he sits next to you, his warmth already reaching your cold heart and thawing the edges a bit. “you’re not in bed yet?”
“can’t,” is all you can say. you don’t have the words or the energy to tell him that you didn’t even realize you should have been asleep, you didn’t realize how many hours had passed as you just laid there staring at nothing.
but he understands.
he pulls you up, catching you when your sore limbs buckle under your sudden upright weight, and he leads you to your bedroom, depositing you on your side of the bed. he leaves and comes back with a bottle of water before you can blink, pushing a straw into your mouth and coaxing you to drink, praising you when you take a few tentative sips. you feel a little silly by how good it feels, him telling you how good you are just for drinking water, but you let it drape over you like a comforting blanket as your mind finally loses the battle against sleep and you drift off in the comfort of his voice.
minho
“hi honey,” minho’s voice floods your brain from where you’re still curled up in bed. it’s well past noon, past the time where you were supposed to meet him at your favorite coffee shop in town during his lunch break. you feel a pang of guilt that makes you curl up even more, soft despair settling into your bones. you want him to leave. you want him to never leave you alone again.
his hand finds the nape of your neck, massaging there gently before his fingers run up to your scalp. the action soothes you, and you can’t help but find comfort in him even though you’ve just let him down. you don’t even know why he’s here, taking care of you when he should be out doing something else-
“whatever’s going on in that pretty head of yours, stop it.” he orders, sitting next to you on the bed and tilting your chin up so he can meet your eyes. “i love you, okay? i want to be here with you. i want you, during the good times and the bad.”
it’s like he’s read your mind.
next thing you know he’s easing you into a seated position and massaging the feeling back into your fingertips. you hadn’t even realized they had fallen asleep until he started, and you wince as the pins and needles sting against his touch. he’s pulling you up then, waiting a moment for your eyes to adjust to the shift before tugging you into your bathroom. before you know it, your clothes are off and you’re under a hot steam of water, his hands on you in the most comforting way as he massages shampoo into your hair and rinses the day off of your body. he’s humming idly, his soft voice echoing off the shower tiles and absorbing into your brain. you feel like a sponge, taking all of his love and keeping it inside of you like it’s the one thing that’s keeping you upright.
as he dries you off with a fluffy towel, you lean in to press a soft kiss to his cheek, causing the tips of his ears to burn pink; it’s silly that such an innocent gesture makes him blush like that, but you think of it as an physical imprint of your love on him, your gratefulness, everything you want to say but can’t.
changbin
“we’re going outside,” changbin suddenly announces, his voice deep under your ear from where your head is snuggled into his chest. you jump a bit, peering up blearily at him.
“outside?” you ask, voice slow and confused. you had been content laying there with him all day. you preferred that, in fact. you had no desire to move, no energy to make your muscles work, no motivation inside of you to do anything other than lay and hope the day passed soon so you could go to bed.
so why is changbin saying that you’re going outside?
“yes, outside. up, up!” he’s too enthusiastic, his voice is too loud in your mushy head, and you glare up at him with squinted eyes.
“have to?” you say, knowing that you’ll lose this battle against a man who can physically pick you up and make you go outside if he wanted to.
“have to.” he nods, interlacing his fingers in yours and yanking, bicep flexing, wrapping his arms around you tight when you stand up on wobbly legs. he holds you there for a second, letting you breathe him in before he pulls you through your house, out the back door and into the backyard.
the worst part was that the air felt good. the soft breeze on your face felt so refreshing, washing over you like a brand new day. the soft grass felt nice under your feet, your toes curling into the cool blades. his hand was warm in yours, guiding you around the perimeter of the fence, walking and walking until you begin to feel the band around your temples loosen, the furrow of your brow unwind, the tenseness of your muscles deflate, like you’re a puppet whose strings were loosened just enough for you to garner some control.
“better, yeah?” he said, soft and satisfied. you him in response, squeezing his hand as you keep walking.
hyunjin
you sigh as you enter through the front door, body weighed down and leaden and each step feeling like a mile from the way they made you exhausted. you immediately collapse onto your couch and click the TV onto the kdrama you’ve been using as background noise for the past few weeks. the episode continues from where you left off, and your eyes don’t leave the screen even though you’re not absorbing any of the content. its just swirling colors and words in a box to you right now, your brain is not comprehending anything, but it’s a nice distraction from the swirling thoughts that were there before.
even when hyunjin leaves your room to pad over to you, draping himself beside you on the couch and wrapping an arm around you, your eyes remain on the screen.
and you sit. and sit. the minutes were ticking away, slow as ever, and you just sit.
until hyunjin turns the TV off, and you don’t even complain because it had gotten to the point where your eyes hurt. you relax into him, startled when he moves to stand up instead, leaving you slumped into the cushions instead of him.
“dance with me,” he says, putting a song on his phone and setting it on the side table. you blink up at him from where he’s standing, hand outstretched waiting for you to take it. he tilts his head a bit when you don’t move, smile encouraging and eyes in crescents, and you sigh and take his hand. you let him pull you up and move your hands around his shoulders as he takes your waist, and he leads you as you both gently sway and step to the beat of the song.
with each step, you felt lighter and lighter, the lead weights you were feeling before disappearing with each breath you can feel on your neck from where his face is pressed. the music he has playing is swirling around you both in a flurry of notes and chords, the rhythm you’ve set with your steps is soothing, and you feel more content in this moment than you’ve felt in days.
jisung
“baby?” you hear from outside your bedroom door, stirring you out of your fitful nap. you never fell into sleep, you’ve been lying there for hours with your eyes closed and you couldn’t sleep. you’re so tired.
you hear him knock again and a whimper leaves your throat when you try to answer. the words won’t come out, they’re stuck, trapped down deep. he opens the door anyways, closing it gently behind him before walking slowly over to you and kneeling by you. his hand brushes your hair back, stopping in surprise when he sees that your eyes are open.
“thought you were asleep?” he says, voice soft and timid in the darkness of your room. you shrug, lips twisting into a frown. is it bad that you were awake? that you were awake and hadn’t left your room, even though you knew he was home for hours? “well, if you’re not, then-”
he cuts himself off as he climbs right into your bed, slithering under your covers and plopping himself right on top of you. his chest covers your back, his legs tangle with yours, and he presses his head into your neck, fluttering small kisses there until he can hear your breath catch on a laugh.
“get off of me, jisung,” you croak out, the first words you’ve muttered all day. the smell of his shampoo is invading your senses, his cologne is seeping into your skin.
“if my baby gets to stay in bed all day, they i get to stay there too.” he declares, squeezing you tight, better than a weighted blanket, trapping all the bad things inside and replacing them with his good.
“can’t breathe,” you choke out in another laugh, the noises you make sounding foreign to your ears. has it really been so long since you’ve laughed? smiled like this?
he rolls off of you suddenly, pulling you along so you were trapped on top of his chest instead, the blanket rolling along with you and wrapping you both in tight.
“better?”
“yeah, sung. i’m better, now.”
felix
he passes you a whisk, looking pointedly at you when you don’t move to the counter where he’s standing. you roll his eyes at him before finally moving your feet, standing from where you’ve been sitting at the kitchen island on a barstool watching him work. he has dinner ready on top of the stove, and a bowl of brownie ingredients on the counter waiting for you to mix together.
“c’mon, love,” he says, perking up a bit when you finally get the whisk inside of the bowl. “we can’t have dinner without dessert, hmm? and we can’t have dessert without you. the most important ingredient in the recipe.”
“lix,” you whine, voice tired and a little furled around the edges. i’m not important, you want to say. “i’m not an ingredient,” is what you say instead.
“oh, really?” he said, reading right through you. he arches a delicate brow at you before moving behind you while you’re whisking to wrap his arms around your middle. he presses his cheek to your shoulder, nuzzling it there like a cat. his lips find your jawline, where he lays a few wet kisses there. “then why do you taste so sweet? sweeter than chocolate. and you’re tough, like unmelted butter. and don’t forget sharp, like cocoa powder.”
his words dig into your brain, battling against the negative thoughts that have been living there for weeks. your self doubt, your insecurity, your low mood fight against them, trying to tell you that he’s lying, he’s just saying that, he doesn’t really mean it. but the longer he stays there, his skin right up against yours, the more those thoughts get beaten down, slayed by the blades of sugar in his voice.
he dips his finger into the finished batter, sliding it into his mouth and swirling it off with his tongue.
“mm, i was right. you taste much better than this.”
seungmin
your feet drag as you walk to your apartment, exhausted from just the one class you had today for no reason at all. it was fine, but even getting out of bed this morning was almost impossible. you felt absolutely drained by the time you got to your lecture, and you don’t think you absorbed a single piece of information for the entire hour and a half you were there.
when you finally made it through the front door, you felt as if there was a pile of bricks in your bag weighing you down, and you quickly dropped it to the floor in favor of collapsing onto the couch next to seungmin. he looked cozy, dressed in an overside hoodie and sweatpants, glasses perched high on his nose and a smart looking novel in his hands. you wiggle your head underneath his arms and press your head to his thighs, feeling bad about taking up his reading time but not willing to stand another second being alone. you’ve been so lonely, all day. he made you feel lighter already, just by his presence, the pressure on your shoulders and around your temples beginning to fade already with his touch.
“bad day?” he asks, not drawing his eyes away from his book but moving one hand to card through your hair, fingers light on your scalp. you hum, not wanting to explain to him that this was just one bad day in a series of bad days, that it wasn’t any better or worse than the last yet you felt even more exhausted by the end of it than you had the day prior. you didn’t want to tell him that you felt tethered to him like he was your lifeline, the one think keeping you afloat in a sea of helplessness.
“read to me?” you say instead, wiggling a bit as you get comfortable in his lap and looking up at him with wide eyes. he looks down finally, expression softening when he takes in your face, and he nods with a soft smile before beginning the chapter again just for you.
jeongin
when he finds you spread over the couch, arm hanging limply over the edge and eyes glazed over from looking at the ceiling, you don’t even realize how much time has passed since he left for work. he’s already home? you swear it had only been an hour, or two max.
“did you eat?” he asked, walking over to you and pressing a soft kiss to your forehead, letting his lips linger for a moment, a stamp of compassion.
“no,” you said, only realizing now that you hadn’t eaten all day. the sun was setting outside, bathing the room in a golden glow, and you couldn’t bring yourself to be hungry, let alone make food and eat it. he clicked his tongue, fox eyes narrowing before leaving your side completely. you sigh at his absence, knowing that he was going to get a snack that you simply wouldn’t want to eat.
“ramen, soup, or grilled cheese?” he asks, materializing in front of you, holding a pack of noodles and a can of soup in one hand and a bag of week-old bread in another. you’re honestly surprised it hasn’t molded yet; probably helps that you haven’t even opened it since you bought it.
“none. i’m not hungry,” you say, crossing your arms and curling up into yourself. you’re sure that you’re pouting, making the picture of an angry toddler with your bunny slippers on your feet and your hoodie swathing your frame. you don’t care. he leaves the room with a sigh again, making you deflate into the couch cushions; you thought he would have fought a little harder, but it’s not his responsibility to make sure you feed yourself, is it?
he startles you out of your pity when he sits next to you, the sofa dipping under his weight and the warmth of his thigh feeling nice next to your head.
“up,” he instructs, nudging at your shoulder until you sit up simply to stop him. he’s holding a half-eaten tub of your favorite ice cream in one hand, two spoons in the other, and he’s wearing a big smile on his face. “i know we’re not supposed to be eating ice cream for dinner, but it’s not like chan hyung is here to say no, is he?”
you grab a spoon wordlessly when the thought of ice cream doesn’t make your stomach turn. one bite couldn’t hurt, right?
the encouraging smile he gives you when you tentatively take one bite doesn’t hurt, either.
warnings: lots of talk about periods, afab reader, food mention, (sorry in advance to hyunjin biases, disgusted!hyunjin has entered the chat lol)
chan
he has an app on his phone and literally tracks your period, so he can always be ready to help. he’s very subtle about it though and he’ll send you messages like “how are you feeling” when he knows you’re close to when you’re supposed to start instead of just outright asking. that way he can confirm he has it correct without being like “are you on your period?” and making you feel weird about it. every month without fail he makes you a little “period survival pack” that has your favorite comfort snacks, chocolate, pain killer, a hot water bottle, and pads and tampons.
minho
you start your period at his place and panic, so you ask him to run to the store to get you some stuff. he says no, and you start to feel super embarrassed and hurt by his response. but then he follows it up by telling you to look under the bathroom sink. turns out he already has all of the stuff you normally use fully stocked. when you come out of the bathroom, he has a mug of tea for you as well as a hot pad and fuzzy blanket on the couch ready and waiting.
changbin
he learns very early on in your relationship what the signs of your period coming look like. the second he sees a single pms symptom, he is getting more lovey dovey than usual. he is going to spend the whole week of your period cuddling you constantly. there is hardly any time you will be near him where his arms aren’t wrapped around you, wanting to provide you with so much comfort, because he knows how rough your period can be. he’s also always ready to go to the store and get you whatever you need at any moment.
hyunjin
the first time you get your period around him he’s low key grossed out by it. you ask him to go to the store to get stuff and he won’t, not because he’s embarrassed, but just because he literally does not want to be involved. eventually, it happens enough that he becomes indifferent and just deals with it, but he’s never going to take care of you or comfort you about it. the only way you will have tampons or pads available when you’re at his apartment is if you hide them there. he won't ever get rid of them because he recognizes you can't help it and that you need all that stuff, but you have to keep the supply going.
jisung
when you ask him to go to the store to get you period products he is 100% willing, but he gets so embarrassed once he actually gets there. it takes him four attempts before he ever actually gets anything, because he’s so nervous and keeps putting them back on the shelf. he ends up going through self checkout and buying a lot of unnecessary items to try and cover up what he’s buying. also, he knows you feel terrible on your period, but he doesn’t know what to do to make you feel better, so he just starts suggesting all his favorite things. like he’s asking you if you want to watch anime or play videogames. not necessarily the most effective approach, but he’s trying his absolute best.
felix
the first time your period happens he literally goes to the store immediately and buys one of every period product. you have to explain that you do not need all of that, and you only use certain things. once he figures out what products you use, he is keeping them stocked under his sink for you. he also has a small emergency kit in his car, so he’s always prepared.
seungmin
he pretends to be super indifferent about your period, but he’s doing lots of little things to make you feel better. like he’s leaving chocolate on the counter for you, or making sure your tampons are stocked in the bathroom, or lighting a candle and leaving a heating pack next to your bed. when you try and thank him for the gestures, he’s going to act like he has no clue what you’re talking about.
jeongin
the first time you have your period you’re embarrassed to tell him, so you try to hint at it, but he just doesn’t get it. you end up having to just outright spell it out for him, and he’s absolutely mortified that you have to go through that. you have to teach him everything about periods, like he literally thinks the sticky part of the pad goes against the skin, not the underwear. he’s very open about it and just wants to learn, so after a few months he’s basically an expert on your period and what you need.
He dropped everything as Seonghwa noticed you stumbling, moving quickly around the room. He was slightly too slow though as he watched you collapse down to the floor, letting go of a sharp gasp.
He knelt down as fast as he could, moving you into a comfortable position. He had no idea what to do, or what he could do to make things easier for you, deciding it was best to just keep you company.
Despite your shut eyes, Seonghwa kept talking to you until he watched your left eye slowly open, looking around the room. His voice drew your eyes across to look at him straight away with a puzzled look.
“What did I do?” You asked Seonghwa, struggling to piece together the few pieces that you had in your mind to know what had gone on.
“You fainted,” Seonghwa told you, taking your hand as soon as he watched your small smile drop. “There’s no need to worry or fret, you’re awake, and that’s the main thing. I’m here to look after you too.”
Your head nodded in reply to Seonghwa, finding comfort in his voice. “I’m sorry if maybe I scared you,” you told him, keeping his attention.
“It’s alright, just as long as you’re healthy, that’s the main thing.”
Hongjoong:
He had lost count of how many times his hand had tapped against the coffee table as Hongjoong continued to sit beside you and wait for you to wait. He was nervous as he watched you, especially as time passed.
He had no idea what had gone on, one minute you left the kitchen to get your phone, the next you didn’t respond to his call. Hongjoong left you for a while, never expecting you passed out to be what he’d find.
He had never moved quicker though when you finally began to stir, letting go of a groan as you woke up to the bright lights of the living room. Hongjoong quickly kept you still, refusing to let you move too quickly.
“I’m alright,” you tried to tell him, but his head shook back at you, keeping you exactly where you were laid out on the floor, giving you time.
“What happened?” Hongjoong asked you, hoping you’d know what had caused you to faint. As he asked the question, a lump ran down your throat. “What’s gone on?” He quizzed, knowing something was up.
Your eyes shut for a moment as you composed yourself, “I’ve been busy these past few days, I guess taking care of myself hasn’t been a priority.”
“That’s it, you’re not doing any more work today, you’re relaxing.”
Yunho:
His body jumped as Yunho was called by Wooyoung, leaving the studio straight away. He had no idea what was going on, but by the panic that was in Wooyoung’s voice, Yunho knew that he was needed.
He never expected to walk into the recording room though and find you passed out on the floor, with Hongjoong and San either side of you. They stepped back as Yunho arrived, letting him by your side.
They left Yunho to look after you once they were sure that he was alright, making sure that he knew they were only a text away. He smiled appreciatively, keeping his eyes on you after until you finally woke.
“Sorry,” was all that you could say to Yunho when you eventually came back into the room, remembering what had happened clearly.
“Don’t say sorry,” Yunho told you as he rested his hand underneath your head, terrified as to how you were feeling. “There’s no need to be sorry about anything,” he told you, but your head shook in reply.
You knew exactly where you were, sighing softly. “You’re supposed to be working, you shouldn’t be worrying about me, I shouldn’t have fainted.”
“Don’t be silly, you can’t help fainting, these things just happen.”
Hey, I was wondering, I requested the reactions to ateez’s crush dating someone else. I think that was the one with Yeosang’s reaction that I loved. I was wondering if you’re okay with me developing a fic around that reaction?? I would credit you of course but if you’re not comfortable with that I won’t do it. I wanted to ask you first.
YES! Feel free to do whatever you want, glad it inspired you :) a mention is greatly appreciated
hi hii! I don’t know if you’re accepting requests, but in case you are, can you do an ateez react to their s/o doing that tik tok trend “moaning in your bf/gf’s ear”?
I love your reacts btw! thanks ♡
Hi there :) thanks for requesting, but I'm currently taking a break from writing other peoples requests, hope you understand, thanks for the love :)
ATEEZ Reaction: Forced breakup with S/O + admitting their insecurities
@hongjoongscftie said: “Hey :) first thing,I hope you're having an amazing day! And secondly,could I maybe request an ateez reaction? I was thinking of the ateez members being insecure about something on themselves (like voice,looks,etc) and reader is telling them that there's nothing to worry about,and that they love them just how they are,and that they always will be there for ateez,but a week later the management is forcing reader to break up with their boyfriend,because it could affect their career,and as they are packing their things (member) walks in? I don't know if this made sense,and I'm sorry for my bad english 🥺”
I hope this is what you had in mind 😊 (Also please normalize dudes talking about insecurities)
Genderneutral
Angst, Fluffy moments
Pairings: You x each member
Warnings: language, breakups, topics of body image, insecurities, crying (San’s part is the most heartbreaking)
Word count: 3.2K
Songs, that convey the feeling I was going for:
Twocolors – Lovefool
Lauv – The Other
Young Lions – You Are II
One Republic – Didn’t I
Halsey - Sorry
*~Seonghwa~*
“Do you like my voice?”
It was late. Seonghwa and you were in bed, about to fall asleep.
“Hm? Yeah, sure Hwa, there’s a reason you sell so many albums.”
“That’s not what I asked, I wanted to know if you like my voice.”
Now you sat up, he really was unsure of this. “Seonghwa, I love your voice… You don’t know this but whenever you’re gone over night, I listen to your demos to hear you sing because it helps me fall asleep.”
That statement conjured a shy smile on his face. “I love you Y/N” He pressed a kiss on your forehead.
…
“No no no… don’t leave me Y/N, please, don’t.”
After the very stern talk with their manager, you had no choice but to pack your bags. Halfway through packing, Seonghwa barged in, a panicked look in his eyes, worried when he saw your tear-stained face.
“We can talk about this… just please, don’t go like this” While begging you to stay he took your clothes out of the bag.
“Mr. Kim made it quite clear that I should leave if I don’t want to ruin your career… I don’t think we have a choice Seonghwa”
“We do, I’ll talk to him, we can be together... maybe we’ll have to stay quiet for a few months, but I can’t lose you, I love you so much and I don’t think I could live without you now, so tell me you really would be okay with leaving, because I don’t think you are” He spoke so fast, you had trouble understanding him.
A new wave of tears rolled down your cheeks as you slowly approached him. “I’m not, I’m not okay with leaving you because I need you too.”
He opened his arms to hug you. Feeling his heartbeat next to your ear calmed you down.
*~Hongjoong~*
“Ugh, I need to train more” He mumbled when he saw himself in the mirror.
“What did you say?” You knew from your own experience that insecurities could consume your whole thinking, so you wanted to prevent that from happening to your boyfriend.
“I just wish I had bigger arms, I look like a weakling next to the other guys.”
“No… no you don’t, you look perfect to me, you know I love you the way you are… Please don’t think about it too much, Joong.”
“Baby, I love you too, thank you” He put an arm around you shoulder and pressed a kiss on your forehead.
…
You didn’t remember the walk home after the talk with Ateez’ manager. You couldn’t leave him. Hongjoong was the first serious relationship you had in quite a long time; you couldn’t give him up. But you couldn’t lie, talking to their manager intimidated you a lot. You didn’t know what would happen if you didn’t comply, and you didn’t want to find out.
You were still in a state of shock when Hongjoong arrived.
“Y/N? Are you home?” He practically ran to the bedroom where you were.
“Please Y/N, I’m sorry I didn’t know they’d do this” He helped you sit up on the bed and crouched down in front of you. You still couldn’t talk.
“Babe, please talk to me.”
Finally, you looked at him. “I don’t know… I don’t know what to do… I don’t want to leave, but I also don’t want to be the reason for your problems… Please tell me what to do.”
“I don’t want you to leave me” There was genuine worry in his eyes. “I really don’t know what I’d do without you… and I think we’ll find a way to deal with them.”
At the moment, you really needed him to be optimistic for the both of you. Slowly, you cupped his face with your hands, you never wanted to forget his face. “I’ll stay with you.”
*~Yunho~*
“Y/N, can I talk to you about something?”
“Always, babe, what’s going on?”
You two were cuddling in his bed after a long and stressful day.
“Do you think I should get a six pack?” When you looked at him, he was biting his lip.
“Where is this coming from?” You knew he needed to be in shape to be an idol, but he was, there was nothing you’d change about him.
He still didn’t look at you “I just… Sometimes when we have dance rehearsal, I feel stupid standing next to San, we’re both dancers but his abs are amazing, he’s been working so hard, and it’s really paid off… we gained a lot of fans through him…”
“Alright listen to me Yunho: If there are fans that are only here for your look, that’s pretty shallow, of course it’s nice to look at pretty people but your message and the songs and your energy is much more important… You are in shape, you’re a main dancer, rationally I don’t think you need to change anything if you’re happy with yourself… and if you’d like to know… I like your soft tummy; I wouldn’t change a thing about you… I love you.”
He finally looked at you, his eyes sparkling, slowly breaking into a smile “I love you too, baby, what would I do without you?”
…
Tears were running down your cheeks, blurring your vision while you were trying to put your clothes into a bag. A friend had offered you could stay with him for a few weeks after Ateez’ manager told you, you needed to leave Yunho. You couldn’t believe it. They didn’t leave you a choice, either you’d leave voluntarily, or they’d have to take more serious measures.
You hadn’t talked to Yunho, but you figured their manager did. You didn’t want to make it harder than it already was. Leaving without a trace would be the best.
Suddenly you heard the door open, no, you couldn’t deal with him now.
“Y/N?” It sounded like he was out of breath once he arrived at the bedroom where you were.
“Y/N? please don’t do this.” His eyes were wide open.
“What choice do I have? You don’t need me to ruin your career.”
“I don’t care about that; I care about you… I can’t live without you, please” He moved closer to take your hands into his. His eyes stared into yours, you could almost see his pain.
You let yourself fall into his arms, letting the tears flow “I love you, Yunho… I don’t wanna go.”
He held you close to him, running his hands through your hair “Then stay.”
*~Yeosang~*
“Hi, baby… I’ve missed you today.”
Yeosang had just come home from work. You greeted him with a big hug. He buried his head in your neck and you could feel him shifting some of his weight onto you.
“Are you okay, Yeo?”
You could hear him breath deeply. “Actually, no, I feel like shit… Remember how we were recording our new song today?”
“Yeah, the one you practiced really hard for.”
“Yeah that. And I totally messed it up… I couldn’t get this one melody right and they were all telling me how I was supposed to sing it, but I didn’t get it right, so I have to go back there tomorrow.”
The way he looked at you reminded you of a hurt puppy, your heart burst inside. So, you pulled him into a hug again. “I’m so sorry, Yeo, that must’ve felt horrible… but I think everyone has bad days sometimes.”
“But it’s made me really insecure of my singing now… I don’t know how I’ll shake that off…”
“It’s okay to doubt yourself sometimes Yeosang, but don’t forget that you’re a professional singer, you have a great voice, so many people love your voice, including me, and you will be able to nail it eventually, you just had an off day, and that’s totally okay… You know there’s probably days were even Beyonce can’t hit the right notes, so don’t worry too much.”
He chuckled a little at your remark and finally looked up at you again to press a kiss on your cheek. “Thank you, love.”
“Now relax and let me take your mind off that.”
…
“Yeosang, I’m sorry, they left me no choice but to leave…” The tears were streaming down your cheeks, you had given up on trying to hold them back a long time ago. Yeosang however, still hadn’t said a word since he came home to you packing your bags. He just stood in the doorframe to the bedroom.
“I’m not going to stand in the way of you and your career, I know how important it is to you, so I guess… I guess this is good-goodbye…” Your voice was dangerously unsteady.
“Aren’t you going to say anything?” You tried to wipe your nose on the sleeves of your hoodie when he handed you a tissue.
Slowly he walked over to you and took you into his arms. You could feel his heartbeat.
“Please, don’t go now…” His voice was only a whisper. “Y/N… don’t you love me anymore?”
In between soft cries you managed to utter a response. “I do lo-love you… but is that enough?”
You looked up at him. You could tell he feared what was to come.
“It is enough for me… I love you so much Y/N, promise you won’t ever leave without talking to me first?”
“I promise” The kiss that followed tasted like salty tears, but it solidified the love you had for Yeosang.
*~San~*
“San, are you alright? You seem distant.”
“Huh? Yeah, I’m fine”
You two were having dinner at your favorite restaurant, but he hadn’t spoken much. Usually, he’d tell you how his day went, but not today.
“Are you sure?”
“Alright, no… I feel under pressure because I need to maintain my abs. Now that I’ve showed them, I feel like everyone expects me to be the muscular guy now… but you know that’s not natural for me.”
You felt for him. He worked so hard but now it was getting too much.
“San, you don’t need to prove yourself to anyone… It’s fine if your abs are not visible all the time… You need to take care of yourself… mentally… and I love you with or without abs if that helps.”
He softly put his hand on yours. “It does help.”
…
His management knew you two had been dating for only a few months, but it was getting serious. And they disregarded that. Being forced to breakup never even entered your mind, so it came as quite the shock to you when Mr. Kim, Ateez’ manager, revealed that you indeed had to break up with San.
At home you were halfheartedly putting your clothes in suitcases, but it felt surreal. Like a nightmare.
You had gotten so used to living with San and to think that it was all over now, because you needed to protect his career made your eyes fill with tears.
When the first tear hit the floor, you heard the door open. San stood next to you just a moment later. He himself had red swollen eyes, you assumed he had been crying too.
“Y/N, please don’t tell me you’re actually thinking about leaving me?”
“What choice do we have?” Your tears threatened to spill again.
“I-I don’t know right now, Y/N, but I’ll figure something- we will figure something out, please don’t do this right now, I can’t have you leave me, please.” The more he spoke, the faster and the more panicked his tone got, his eyes opened wide. His hands gripped your arms on each side. You assumed it took a lot out of him not to shake you.
“San, I don’t think that’s a- a possibility anymore… Mr. Kim, he sounded so serious…”
Suddenly he let go of you and took a step back. “Do you- do you want to go?”
You didn’t know what you wanted anymore. It was late and you were drained. Apparently, you hesitated a little too long for San’s liking because he turned around, headed for the door.
“No, San, don’t leave, please, I don’t-” But he was already out the door.
Had you not felt broken-down, you might have followed him out the door, but not like this. You collapsed to your knees and let the tears wash the little composure that was left, away.
*~Mingi~*
“Wow, Y/N, you look gorgeous.”
Mingi entered your shared bedroom while you were putting on some makeup.
“Thanks, baby”
He walked behind you to look at the mirror. A few moments passed when you realized he was staring at his own reflection.
“What are you thinking?”
He took a deep breath before answering. “I’m wondering if my face is handsome enough.”
That was it, you weren’t having him doubting himself. You turned to look straight into his eyes. “Listen to me, your face is so unusually handsome, I’m still amazed whenever I look at you… your eyes are so warm, they’re my favorite feature of yours… also your face is doing a pretty good job at keeping your eyes, nose and lips in place, so you really shouldn’t complain” You had hoped a little humor would take his mind off his insecurity.
He chuckled. “That’s why we’re in a relationship, you always talk me out of bad moments… thank you baby.”
…
Mingi was already home when you got there. For a while you just looked at each other, neither of you knowing what to say.
“Hi…”
“Y/N, I didn’t know they want us to break up, I’m sorry, I’m going to talk to them.”
You couldn’t help but hug him. He was your safe place. “I don’t want us to breakup, Mingi… I can’t lose you” The thought of not having him in your life drew tears in your eyes, it was too painful.
“Shh shh, you’re not going to lose me… I won’t let that happen.” He tried to calm you down by caressing your hair. “We’ll find a way” He whispered, more to himself than to you.
*~Wooyoung~*
It was very early in the morning. Wooyoung was already getting dressed while you were having trouble to get out of bed.
“Babe, do you think my thighs are too big? I feel like my jeans are getting tighter…”
Once you opened your eyes you saw Wooyoung trying to squeeze his fabulous thighs into some jeans, he wasn’t wearing a shirt.
You slowly got out of bed, not taking your eyes off him.
“Clothes can always be altered… and I love your thighs… they’re really… hot” You blushed a little.
“Is that so?”
He tucked a strand of hair behind your ear and kissed you.
…
Why did you have so many clothes? All the tears blurred your vision and whenever you put five shirts in your suitcase another ten were behind that, it was frustrating.
You tried to focus on the simple task of packing, trying hard not to think about the whole situation. You couldn’t believe they expected you to leave Wooyoung. You loved him, and he loved you. And that was supposed to not matter at all?
When you were done, you just sat on the bed. You were worn-out from crying so much.
You didn’t even hear him enter the apartment. Suddenly Wooyoung stood in front of you in the bedroom.
“I came as soon as I heard… I’m sorry babe… you don’t deserve all this shit.” He helped you stand up and took you into his arms.
“I’m just tired, Woo.”
His response was to hold you closer to his chest. “I know… we can go to bed.”
A few minutes later you were lying in his arm about to drift off to sleep, leaving your troubles behind.
“Y/N?”
“Hm?”
“I just have one question.”
“What is it?”
You could hear him inhale deeply.
“Would you- Are you considering leaving me?”
You didn’t think he’d be thinking about that. “Wooyoung, I love you; I will never leave you… I thought you knew that…”
He pressed a short kiss in your hair. “I just needed to hear that… I love you so much, little one.”
*~Jongho~*
“Baby, do you think my butt is too big?”
You were just about to leave for work when you saw him standing in front of the mirror in the bedroom.
“Hu- wh-what?” You took a few steps towards him to give his booty a little slap.
“Jong, booties can never be too big” You smirked at him. “I love your cute little butt… and I love you… so stop being insecure about it” You pressed a kiss on his cheek. He blushed.
…
After your meeting with a KQ executive, you couldn’t think straight. They told you, you needed to leave Jongho as soon as possible because of his career.
Somehow you made it back home where you collapsed into your tears. After a few minutes you mustered up enough courage to pack your bags.
You left the apartment with two suitcases dragging behind you. You had almost made it to the end of the street when you saw him running towards you. “Y/N wait!”
When he finally stood in front of you, he was quite out of breath. Looking at him drew more tears into your eyes. You had trouble holding them back “Jongho, we don’t have a choice, I need to do this, I can’t keep hurting you more.”
“No, please, I love you, this is hurting me more than my career ever could… please don’t leave me, we’ll find a way to fix this.”
He held one of your hands in his two big hands, his eyes opened wide.
You really weren’t sure if you could hide your relationship from his agency and the fans. You were so unsure of the whole situation, but you knew you loved him.
After a few moments of silence, you kissed him with all your passion.
“I do love you Jong, but this is going to be really hard, so I need you to help me when I doubt myself, when I doubt us.”
