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Aesthetic sideblog: concordantia

[generic-internet-name]

talking like point-and-click game narration to the bugs in my room

[generic-internet-name]

you can't get out that way!

[generic-internet-name]

that's not very helpful.

[generic-internet-name]

maybe the open window will help.

[generic-internet-name]

try the open window instead.

[shamebats]

I wish people were as scared of getting into a car accident as they are of being true crime'd. Maybe then they wouldn't be on their phones while driving.

[sundae-meringue]

True crime girlies will be like "wtf I would never go for a walk at night, what if the hash slinging slasher gets me" and then use their knees to merge with no turn signal in front of a semi while applying makeup with both hands

[gloomsday]

sent this message to my coworker today and he sent me this screenshot with microsoft teams's suggested replies... incredible 10/10 no notes.

[stjohnstarling]

Crawling out of my grave to rub my eyes sleepily, grimace, and crawl back in for another five minutes. 

[do-not-u-dare]

”Explain yourself” followed by “stop making excuses” has always baffled me because the fuck you think explaining myself is????

[excuse-me-thanks]

“i should take a walk for my mental health” boring, tired, i don’t even really wanna do it tbh

“i need to check the perimeter” i need to check the perimeter

[depsidase]

[parakeet]

if you go looking for doom and gloom all you will see is doom and gloom. if you go looking for reduced items at the grocery store you may find a littol treat

[vinegarss]

captchas are getting way too hard man I can't do this

[maxknightley]

the thing is that vibrators really do work well as personal massagers. and that makes me wonder if someone out there really is using a bong to smoke tobacco

[unusual]

[macrolit]

[birdiebowers]

live laugh love Herbert Ponting's descriptions

[the-big-mood]

[wizardshark]

How do I explain Plato's allegory of the cave to my cat?

[sexshopshenanigans]

gato’s allegory of the fishtank

[solonelytrying2beyours-deactiva]

lord forgive me but I may have to make a nonessential purchase

[professorwetware]

[snapscube]

everyone needs to grow the fuck up and start playing pretend with toys