[vampirecorleone]

"Now get out of my way, Henry, or I swear to God you'll be wearing your balls for earrings!" Creepshow (1982) dir. George A. Romero

[jessiedragonda]

Some bits I liked from the morse novels

[innervoiceartblog]

Elsie de Wolfe interior design for a sitting room in the house Marlene Dietrich owned in Hollywood in the 1930s.

[misscromwellsmonocle]

Art in the Age of Digital Puritanism (2022) by Iness Rychlik The artist reposted it in 2024 "because it feels relevant in social media today".

[thegryffe]

[mossdftba]

[Image description 1: a photo of a nude woman in repose, elbow resting on a greco-roman column, face and upper torso turned away. A pair of robotic arms hold plastic films that pixelate anything viewed through them to censor the woman's groin and visible nipple. End ID 1.

Image description 2: a tumblr censor blacked out post with the text "potentially mature content. This post may contain content not suitable for all audiences" with a button to click and view the post. End ID 2.]

[doom-cookie-writes]

wip Wednesday!

A little peek at the Hunter!Caroline au I've got rotating in my head rn!

With Dagger Held Unsheathed

Chapter 1. Prodigal Daughter

July 2005

"What are all the ways to kill a vampire?" Her dad asked.

They'd been sparing all morning, and while Caroline had been working on her stamina, she was nowhere near the level of her dad. He'd barely broken a sweat, meanwhile, Caroline felt like she was swimming in it.

"Prolonged exposure to sunlight!" She panted, continuing to throw punches.

"For how long?" Dad asked, catching each strike on his palms.

"Approximately," punch, punch, "two minutes for a complete burning," punch, punch, kick, "anything less, and they can heal," punch, punch, "so long as they have blood!"

"Good! What else?"

Caroline ducked a swipe and kept punching. "Vervain can burn them like the sun, but you need a lot of it to kill," elbow, punch, punch, "so it's best used to incapacitate!"

"Excellent! But what are the for sure ways to kill them?"

"Removing the head," punch, kick, punch, "or," she ducked another swipe and pulled a blunted dowel from her boot, popping up fast and aiming right at her fathers chest, "classic stake to the heart," she smiled.

Bill Forbes smiled back proudly, holding his hands up in surrender.

"Very good," he laughed. "But," he grabbed her wrist to redirect her aim, "you'll have a hard time trying to go straight through the sternum like that. Come up from underneath," he shoved the dowel against his solar plexus, just enough so Caroline could get the feel of the angle. "Or from the side," he moved her hand again, "right here between the ribs."

"Between the 4th and 5th," Caroline nodded.

"That's right," he said, releasing her hand. "And remember," he grabbed her by the shoulders and his voice got serious. "Your enemy is bigger, stronger, and faster than you. So the best kill -"

"Is from a distance," she finished for him. "I know, Dad."

[probablysomethingtm]

Lmao we have to fucking destroy this company are you fucking kidding me with this shit

Google Search as you know it is over | TechCrunch

Google is transforming Search from a list of links into an AI-powered experience filled with conversational answers, autonomous agents, and

[probablysomethingtm]

Remember that xkcd about how Google searches are shit now? What if we made them even worse for no reason?

[probablysomethingtm]

I will vote for any candidate who promises to go scorched fucking earth on every tech company. Break every single one of them up into companies based around a single product and then split those in thirds. Weaponize existing antitrust laws to the hilt and pass the most draconian versions of them ever seen on this planet. Nationalize google search specifically. Pass consumer privacy protections strict enough to kill the data harvesting industry for good. Make all of these fuckers go bankrupt for this rent-seeking shit

[probablysomethingtm]

[averseunhinged]

things are happening. cake fic things. i've been going back and forth on cutting this part, so it might not see the light of ao3.

"Taking up carpentry?"

"Less taking up and more returning to, I'd say." Klaus contemplated the spit in his hand. "You're here early."

"I'm getting breakfast with your sister." Cami flopped down onto the nearby shaded ground like a puppet with its strings cut. "That was the plan, anyway. How am I the one who worked all night, but she overslept?"

"Yes, well, that's Bekah for you. Inconvenient in ways that are, of course, never her own fault."

They were quiet for some time. Smoothing over the wood with fine grain sandpaper, he let the rhythm of it sync with Cami's slow, dozy breaths.

"I thought Caroline said there was a meeting with the witches this morning?"

"They're a bit more reasonable when Elijah goes with her, and I'm a more effective deterrent from a distance at this point in the negotiations."

"And Davina hates you."

"And Davina hates me," he agreed, thumbing over the wood for any continuing roughness to the grain.

"Can't imagine why."

He rolled his eyes. "It's not like I killed the boy. He's perfectly well."

"Funny how those pesky threats of maiming and murder don't just go away when you're done with them."

"Yes," he drawled in that way he knew particularly irritated her. "That's the point of the endeavor."

"I'm just saying, not everyone's patient enough to forgive death threats and hybrid bites."

Klaus paused, subtly and not for long, but enough that Cami was sure to notice. She always noticed. Trading out the spit for the trough, he considered the necessity of attaching a handle. "I see someone's been telling tales of Mystic Falls."

Cami snorted inelegantly. "That place sounds crazier than New Orleans."

"Perhaps not as a whole but per capita, certainly." He laughed under his breath. "There's something in the water."

[impossiblekryptonitecolor]

WIP Wednesday - Return of the Augustine AU

Happy Wednesday! I am rebooting the Augustine AU. If you don't remember (and why would you? I haven't touched it in years at this point), the premise is that instead of Damon and Elena getting infected with the Ripper virus, it's Caroline.

It got backburnered for ages because it felt too similar to Stubborn Season, but the new structure is finally cooking. Nothing that has previously been posted remains canon, but if you want to see it, you can find the other posts in the tags.

Snippet below.

Caroline startled awake. Ravenous. It wasn’t until she was halfway through the glass of blood that her brain came online enough to have questions. She finished it before facts started snapping into focus. She didn’t recognize the room she was in. Her neck had been snapped. Whoever had kidnapped her had supplied blood. There was more, and she poured herself another glass almost as she processed it. She probably shouldn’t, but it wasn’t vervained and she was so hungry. She would need it to escape. She processed that the room smelled like Klaus just before the door opened. “Apologies for the wait, love. We’re still finalizing the arrangements for your fellow experimentee and the mad scientist chap. His accommodations will be less comfortable than yours, I assure you.” “Experiment? Klaus, what—Did you kidnap me? What’s going on?” “You’re not a prisoner here, Caroline. This Enzo used your phone to call me, by all accounts at your behest. You don’t remember?” Enzo. She had gone with Damon and his frenemy Enzo to try to find Dr. Maxfield. Someone had to be the voice of reason—even if it was just to say that they needed to get information and not just torture him for fun. She remembered— “Maxfield injected me with something. And then—I don’t—“

[beardedmrbean]

this sounds like a party to me

[grand-theft-carbohydrates]

[courtjester69420]

sometimes the other woman isn't even a woman. it's thomas cromwell

[deputychairman]

Oooh @vaguely-concerned now THIS is the new spicy take I was looking for in the Tudor history fandom

[averseunhinged]

WIP Wednesday, but I only have Mass Effect this week. I did work on some TVD, but it's very rough and also the sad thing no one wants.

"Hackett," he answered the alert on his omnitool.

"Sir," Lieutenant Trang replied. "Admiral Shepard is on her way to you. I told her you were on your way out, but she insisted. I apologize, sir."

"You're all right, Trang. You would have had to shoot her to stop her."

Trang's half-second pause made it clear she wouldn't be averse. "As you say, sir."

"Listen, can you bring in some of whatever they're calling coffee today? If I'm going to deal with a visit from Hannah Shepard, I'll be needing fortification."

"Of course, sir," she acknowledged right as the door to his office swung open without any warning.

"What the hell, Steven?"

Hannah Shepard had been charmingly brash when she was eighteen and he was twenty. He'd found her less and less so as the years had passed.

"Shut the door if you're going to yell at me about something classified."

She didn't slam the door, but she shut it with the same leashed aggression she'd always had. "You know what I'm talking about."

"Believe it or not, I stopped keeping track of reasons I might have pissed you off decades ago." Hackett gestured towards one of the slightly singed chairs in front of his barely cracked desk.

The way she sat made it seem like she was still standing, spine straight and shoulders squared. "When exactly were you planning on informing me the Normandy reported in?"

"How did--you went to the hospital this morning."

"It's a quiet time to visit. She's usually awake by now." Hannah leaned forward without losing a centimeter of rididity. "Instead, she was still fast asleep, and a turian pulled a pistol on me."

"Well, she probably had a late night."

"That's not the part I take exception to."

Trang knocked twice on the door before entering with a tray. She set it down on the desk with an air of general disapproval.

"Muffins?" Hannah was understandably confused.

"Choc chip," Trang reluctantly informed her. "Anything else, sir?"

"No, thank you, Lieutenant." He offered her a grateful half-smile. "That will be all."

The coffee tasted like battery acid's less attractive cousin, but he'd grown almost used to it.

"Trang came into possession of a cache of just-add-water muffin mixes. It's best if I don't ask too many questions."

[razmerry]

"dc is darker" "marvel has more fantasy" "dc is mystery and marvel is sci fi - " all of you are wrong. dc comics is when a man has black hair and blue eyes. marvel comics is when a man has blonde hair and blue eyes.

[semirefecta]

i think about this turian legend from time to time

[animentality]

[barbrapleeez]

[huariqueje]

Music of the Night - Karen Richardson

Canadian , b. 1957 -

Varnished watercolour on panel , 12 x 12 in.

[sleepyrogues]

Pro hag, anti ai