AveryCollector

Fandom side blog. Will attempt to only post Batfam/DC related content here. I have a lot of AUs and Fix-its in my head because comics.

[moncalatinnedsardines]

Zeb’s turn on the werewolf au

Transcribed under the cut for those who can’t read my handwriting lol

Ezra: What are they doing?

Sabine: Hera called it “enrichment.”

Ezra: I don’t think Kanan needs any more enrichment.

Sabine: I’m pretty sure it’s enrichment for Zeb.

[colbycheeseslice]

Robin ❤️💛💚

[theambassadorposts]

[officialfist]

“Be in your mate’s corner, ask twice” damn

[adigitalsky]

yeah it’s gone now, sorry about that

[laurasimonsdaughter]

Perhaps they ought not to have eaten the dragon. There had been people objecting to it at the time. Surely such meat was poisonous. Perhaps it was even an affront, an insult to some intangible order of nature they ought to honour.

But the city was starving, the siege had gone on too long, and the king's troops were still a week's march away. The scorched earth would be fertile again in time, but right now it was barren. Right now there were mouths to feed. So they changed their crossbows for butcher knives and got to work.

None of the royal commanders asked any questions that could not be answered. After all, their aid had come shamefully late. The dragon's horned skull made a noble gift, a fitting tribute from a triumphant city to its humbled king. Who would have thought to question them?

And none of the townsfolk spoke up, when the first golden-eyed babes were born. Children who grew up barefoot and fearless, clambering over the city's patched and rebuilt roofs like they had no notion of falling, with a strange glitter to their skin when the sunlight hit it just so. No one breathed a word about dragons.

Because soon enough there were deft, young hands taking loaves straight out of the oven, heedlessly lifting iron from the forge, plunging into boiling laundry water. And some of them more wondrous still, wild, warm-skinned youths, with inexplicable knowledge and peculiar remedies.

A blessing, their families said proudly. A blessing after so much hardship. Which it was, in its way. This city would never fear dragon fire again.

[evilwizard]

instead of exterminating rats, the state of New York should hire a rat trainer to round them all up and teach them to do odd jobs. they could clean up litter, scrub the manhole covers… run electrical wires. maybe do some plumbing

there should be a dedicated rat feeding station in every subway. if you pass out drunk on the bus a squadron of 50-60 purebred albino rats should carry you gently down the street back to your home. i know this may all sound rather infeasible—but if you hire me, the pied piper,

[bwaah]

make a orchestra

violin

cello

piano

trumpet

tuba

flute

timpani

bass drum

harp

triangle

cymbals

other/get in the comments

Voting ended onMar 5, 2024

RB for big orchestra

[emma-d-klutz]

There are sheep near my house.

I live in a city.

They graze in an abandoned lot with disused train tracks

They're not always there

They have a sheep dog who growls at me if I hang around too long

Whose fucking sheep are these?

[bwaah]

make a orchestra

violin

cello

piano

trumpet

tuba

flute

timpani

bass drum

harp

triangle

cymbals

other/get in the comments

Voting ended onMar 5, 2024

RB for big orchestra

[scribblydribbly]

12 year old Bruce: I’m moving out

12 year old Bruce: *spends the night in the pool house*

[scribblydribbly]

Alfred: He’ll be back for breakfast

Alfred, watching Bruce hunt squirrels: Oh dear God

[scribblydribbly]

Alfred, laying back on a pool chair, primly reading the paper: Wrong

12 year old Bruce, foraging for mushrooms: This is clearly entoloma abortivum

Alfred, not looking up: Wrong

[scribblydribbly]

Bruce: You’re wrong

Alfred: Check again

Bruce: *checks again*

Bruce:

Bruce:

Bruce:

Alfred, adjusting the newspaper: That’s entoloma sinuatum—

Bruce: I know

[jackalopetrope]

[bunjywunjy]

yeahhh I lied.

one more time, HAPPY MOON LANDING DAY!

aaand gooodnight.

[ch3shiresmil3]

Consider: Batman’s identity gets leaked to the press, enough that it’s a popular rumor but not enough for it to be confirmed, and the JL all pitch in to just. Gaslight the shit out of the media.

Superman: Uh, Bruce Wayne? Hasn’t Batman saved that guy a couple of times?

Wonder Woman: I’m unsure if we’re speaking of the same Bruce Wayne. The one who invited me to a gala three weeks ago and got so drunk he tripped into a chocolate fountain? This is the Bruce Wayne you believe to be the Bat?

Green Lantern: Doesn’t Bruce Wayne have like a million kids? And run a business? I don’t know about the rest of the League, but superhero-ing’s a full-time job for me.

Flash: (play dumb) Who’s Batman? (not that dumb-!)

Green Arrow: Why would I want to be on a team with a billionaire?

[amazingeurus]

😚😚💕enjoy！✨✨✨

[tarragonthedragon]

an incomplete list of dc heroes whom i believe to have beef that none of the others understand:

batman and starfire (the only thing they have in common is the desire to hit anyone who hurts nightwing over the head with a mallet and they're both on each others' lists)

constantine and captain marvel ("why are you-- why are YOU-- why are you lIKE THIS")

green arrow and nightwing (did dick steal ollie's shtick, or is ollie a grown man who started a turf war with a 9yo? a question for the ages. also their arguments about being nicer to roy have escalated to biting)

wonder woman and atom (i just think it would be funny. theyre both so meticulously polite that noone would ever realise they hate each other to a savage and irrational degree)

red robin and the entirety of justice league international (there was a thing. several things. several things and an unsanctioned zipline)

[osheamobile]

The real reason Bruce Wayne keeps training kids is so that there’s eventually a gradually cascading order of vigilantes protecting Gotham. When you defeat one, there’s a slightly smaller one just behind, ready to pick up the slack.

Batryoshka dolls.

[twilightofthesandwiches]

[thisiswhereikeepdcthings]

What if everyone in Gotham knows who Batman is? They all know, they just don’t say anything. It’s not something that is spoken of or acknowledged in any way, other than the occasional glance or shared look of understanding. But they all know. Except for Brucie Wayne. Lord bless their himbo sunshine child, but he seems to be the only person in Gotham that doesn’t know who Batman is. He must be protected at all costs.

Everyone in Gotham knows who Batman is. (They’re wrong)

[thisiswhereikeepdcthings]

[river9noble]

Lord bless their himbo sunshine child 🤣🤣🌼

[river9noble]

Ok but like what if Two-Face started the Matches rumor because he wants to protect his little meow meow ? Knowing that no one’s gonna fuck with Matches if they think he’s Batman.

Two-Face: You ever notice how Matches and Bats are never in the same room at the same time?

Goons: 👀

Two-Face: Ol’ Matches is pretty built under that plaid atrocity, isn’t he? Kind of Batman built, you know what I’m sayin?

Commissioner Gordon: 👀

Two-Face: I ain’t never seen Matches inside Arkham, is all I’m sayin … OR HAVE I 😏😏😏 ?

Arkham Guards: 👀