You reblogged something from me recently from your alt account. I looked through some of your posts on both accounts and got the impression that maybe hopefully you might be openminded to having some civil discussions with radfem-leaning people on feminist topics.
So I had started writing out a reply to you on one of your posts to try to share my perspective, but it got a little long, and I realized that perhaps everything I wrote would come off as overwhelming all at once and all of a sudden, so I wanted to check with you first before I reblog to see if you’re okay with discussing your perspectives further after hearing out my perspective from an intersectional feminist standpoint and why gender-critical feminism has been the only type of feminism that has actually felt inclusive towards me and other women of color.
From everything I’ve noticed, most “TERFs”, “radfems”, and “gender-critical feminists” have almost all started out as being very pro-trans, trans-inclusive, or have identified as trans themselves at some point, before they became “TERFs”.
I feel as if there’s so many nuances to many issues that trans-rights activists and liberal feminists in general have been avoiding acknowledging. And so as someone who’s struggled with lifelong dysphoria myself and probably always will, radical feminists are the only group of women who I have noticed will actually acknowledge and sympathize with my struggles and perspectives and all the nuances involved, rather than silencing or dismissing me. I became critical of the concepts of “gender”, “femininity”, and “masculinity” on my own as a child, before I even had internet access.
So that’s why after discovering the principles that radical feminists believe in in recent years, and after seeing all the misogyny & hatred play out online and IRL towards any women & girls who critique the concept of gender or who speak up for women’s rights, I’ve realized that I feel a kinship with most radical feminists much more than the mainstream version of “feminism” that often feels like feminism for privileged wealthy/middle-class white people.
I align with much of what radfems and “TERFs” believe and say, and I appreciate that the “TIRFs” seem to have found a balance between speaking up for women’s rights and also openly expressing empathy and kindness for trans-identifying and gender-dysphoric people, even if I think that the concept of telling dysphoric people that we can change our sex or gender is super harmful to us.
I’m really sorry about how long this message still turned out actually lol. Feel free to ignore this if you’re not interested in discussing further, but if you’re open to me reblogging one of your posts to elaborate my perspectives further, please let me know. ❤️
For what it’s worth, I think that most “radfems” and “TERFs” are actually very much empathetic towards people who identify as trans. Even the “mean feminists” online who claim to hate all males. The harsher, abrasive-sounding feminists online and IRL just seem tired and exhausted from all the bad-faith arguments, death/rape/violent threats, doxxing, and the overall hatred towards them when initially sharing politely-worded concerns. It’s hard for me to blame them for not wanting to be polite anymore. As I often feel the same way as them when trying to have discussions with others on trans issues. But I recognize that most trans-right activists and some trans-identifying people are probably not intentionally trying to be malicious or misogynistic, and might not be aware of some of the other perspectives and nuances that are necessary to consider, especially considering that many of us who disagree with “gender ideology” may suffer from severe dysphoria ourselves. That’s a perspective that many radfems don’t openly talk about, as it gets very personal when trying to explain. I’m still grateful towards those more “abrasive” radfems for speaking up and holding the line while preserving their peace and not exhausting themselves with conversing politely with those who they perceived as upholding misogynistic beliefs, since those types of feminists are very necessary too. But if you’re wanting to try to debate with someone who is radfem-leaning to discuss controversial stances and if you’re genuinely openminded to hearing out a different viewpoint on some stuff, I’m open to discussing civilly with you.
First off: thanks for reminding me to enable asks and anons on the alt (it was initially a messages-only side blog, so I'd completely to re-activate a lot of things when I switched it over)
Second, no worries! The length is not at all an issue, so long as it's not from one of those spambots that I see everywhere about any of these topics.
I'd certainly be willing to get into the weeds of it with someone who wants to! (Though, again, I'm not sure if this main blog will have funky posting and notifications, etc so the alt would probably be best to start with)
Surprisingly enough I have seen quite a few radfems express similar perspectives (at the very least being open to empathy for trans folks, or expressing some aspect of dysphoria themselves), so that's not a very strange concept for me. That perspective is actually the one that I'm most interested in engaging with, frankly, as I'd bet it's the one I'd have the most common ground with.
(I mean, don't get me wrong, I've been on the internet long enough to have had discourse for discourse's sake - I've definitely had wild ones on other topics from just being bored, but having a discussion that's not, well, you know, Tumblr discourse, is also something I'd be very interested in)
Not sure what method would would best for you, but i should have messages turned on for the alt now, and obviously reblogs and such. I feel like chat is most conducive to, like, back and forths? But I certainly can appreciate wanting it to be publicly viewable as well.
Idk, let me know, I'm flexible.