Correct me if I'm wrong here but, The Trojan war? Were condom companies really going off on each other like that?
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$LAYYYTER

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Not today Justin
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

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Sweet Seals For You, Always

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@awful-ninja
Correct me if I'm wrong here but, The Trojan war? Were condom companies really going off on each other like that?
Fun fact! Water actually turns “blood red” when it is contaminated by sulfur creating sulfuric acid. And scientists have discovered that around the time of the plagues a volcano went off that disturbed Egypt’s environment. So the plagues are scientifically proven. The other parts of the plagues are explained by the sulfuric acid river making the animals leave the river and escaping into the human population.
WHY DIDNT ANYONE TELL ME THE PLAGUES WERE PROVEN
if anyone wants a full list heres how they happened:
basically they all stem from a massive eruption of a volcano on the island of santorini off the coast of greece. the ash then floated over to egypt which kickstarted the plagues
1) blood: the ash carried the mineral cinnabar, which has the capability of turning water red
2) frogs: the ash also had many toxic and acidic substances so naturally, all the frogs are gonna flee the river
3) lice: given what was going on insects would have burrowed into dead animals/peoples skin and laid eggs, which then hatched
4) beasts: everything is getting poisoned from the ash and toxins, causing animals to freak the fuck out/die
5) pestilence: toxins again
6) boils: the ash would have caused storms that carried acid rain which when it fell, would irritate peoples skin causing boils
7) hail: the storm again
8) locusts: again with the insects and the amount of dead bodies and such which attract more insects. a lotta insects basically.
9) darkness: the ash covered the sky, blocking out the sun
10) slaying of the first born: given that children’s bodies were found in higher numbers than others, some archeologists think they may have been sacrificed to stop all the destruction, but they aren’t 100% sure about that. this is just me but I would say another possibility is that babies/kids are a lot more susceptible to toxins and shit, so while an adult may have been fine or gotten a bit sick, it might have been very dangerous/deadly for kids or babies
the volcano would also attest for the parting of the sea weirdly enough. the red sea was in fact the ‘reed’ sea, and was very shallow, probably waist deep or so. given the amount of shit dumped into the ocean from the volcano, this wouldve caused a tsunami to head towards egypt. the water would get sucked out from the reed sea right before the tsunami hit, letting people pass it easily, then the actual tsunami would hit, fuckin up anyone who tried to follow.
another theory is that the red water was caused by algae, which would cause the frogs and stuff to jump out as well. the algae also carried substances toxic to animals so if they ingested any they’d get sick and die, so more insects. in this theory there was a sand storm coincidentally that caused the rest
some sources: X X
The volcano wasn’t ON Santorini - it WAS Santorini, then called Thera. It completely blew away the Minoan settlements on the island and was one of the largest eruptions in human history.
The tsunamis from the Theran eruption devastated Crete, weakening the then-powerful Minoan civilization, leaving them open to being invaded by the Mycenaeans.
The volcanic winter it created devastated crops in China leading to the fall of the Xia Dynasty.
The abrupt and catastrophic loss of the people of Thera may have also inspired the myths about Atlantis.
this is blowing my fucking mind
I love that if you really boil all this information down, what you get is something approximating “the sinking of Atlantis caused the 10 Biblical plagues of Egypt” which is, like, one of the greatest mythological mash-ups I have ever heard of.
If a democrat was assassinated could you imagine what would be going on right now?
Me: Wow I had so many panic attacks last night and I don't feel rested at all. In fact I feel as though nothing good will ever happen to me again. Floating Purple Seahorse That Appears To Me When I Haven't Slept In Multiple Days: you didn't take your meds yesterday because your phone was dead when your alarm would have gone off Me: Oh shit you're right. Thank you, Floating Purple Seahorse. FPSTATMWIHSIMD: also everyone you care about will die someday Me: Could have done without that reminder FPSTATMWIHSIMD: you don't own me
Me: Why do I feel like I want to be fed to a woodchipper FPSTATMWIHSIMD: you haven't had a meal in 23 hours Me: Damn, that's true. Thanks, FPSTATMWIHSIMD: your bones are wet Me: come on man
help they're tagging me as #harry du bois again
My friends hosted a Talk Like a Pirate Day party and then immortalized some of the shit we said:
"you're the one, you're all i've ever wanted.
i think i'll regret this."
Old compilation of Mikuru from The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya tripping and falling in every dub I could find. Highlights are the Italian dub where she honks like a duck and the Russian version where it sounds like they used candid audio of the voice actress dying.
did I just watch 19 seconds of an anime girl falling on her face? yes I did
"actually the imperialist state propaganda machine didn't teach me about this and I don't plan on doing anything to rectify that" really isn't something I'd go around advertising, personally
huh why don't i feel so good *remembers the curse on my bloodline* ohhhhhh
Daily schedule:
Wake up on the problematic side of the bed
Eat a harmful breakfast
Log onto tumblr and reblog posts from abusive mutuals
Attend narcissistic classes
Watch an irredeemable movie
Listen to offensive music
Eat a cancelled dinner
Go to sleep derogatorily
Have dreams that will have aged poorly by the time I wake up
i love college because sometimes someone will say the cruelest fucking thing to you and then you’ll discover later that your friends know him exclusively as “that asshole”
the collective power of “god i hate that guy” is not to be underestimated
How people treat you after you come out as trans is as if there was a murder and you are both the victim and the culprit.
Cis people will never understand the true pain of watching your family grieve your death while simultaneously treating you as if you, personally, cut the throat of whomst their grief lies with, even though its you, and you're still living.
what did that one person’s great therapist say? “Your father is mourning an empty grave; you’re not obligated to go lie down in it.”
there's a hole in your soul (and something's trying to get out)
dont worry mutuals im not perceiving you as your assigned gender youre all a glowing humanoid light form to me dont even worry about it
in my mind you look like this
thanks tumblr
ok but [tumblr image loading] is exactly how i perceive my mutuals' genders
happy pride month to country mama lynn and country mama lynn only
Someone give this woman a damn crown and medal
Happy pride month to country mama lynn and ger gay son only
aint it crazy how many people realize they're queer when they have the language to express how they feel and a support system to encourage self exploration????
YESYESYESSS!!!!!!!!
SOMEONE GIVE THIS WOMAN THE KEYS TO THE DAMN UNIVERSE SHE NEEDS TO RULE US ALL!!!!!!!!!!!! <3