Resist

"Looking after yourself first doesn't mean not stopping to help someone who needs it; it just means not throwing yourself on the fire to keep someone else warm." they/she/he 30's & hella queer. 10+ year tumblr veteran. askbox open

[hustlerose]

[hustlerose]

[hustlerose]

i have been informed by literally every french speaker on earth that “une pipe” is slang for blowjob

[kidrat]

U can watch Star Wars so many times and it doesn’t prepare u for how dumb Star Wars is. For one thing I think we gloss over how kenobi (who has definitely been at the club. Please.) describes the mos eisley cantina as the worst most villainous place ever and then u get inside and it’s a pack of muppets vaping

[shane-actually]

the man who has witnessed a thousand bloody battles saying the airport bar is the worst place he’s been is based, actually

[twocubes]

people want doing the right thing to be like pulling the correct lever at the correct time but actually usually doing the right thing is more like holding a moderate weight at arm's length continuously for seventeen years

[twocubes]

every so often since like, March, this post will spike in popularity, and I'll just suddenly know that a few thousand people somewhere are Going Through it for reasons I cannot know in any detail, like I'm some small node in our collective lymbic system that doesn't actually know what to do with the signals it's given. it's interesting.

[nealashitposts]

So I've got this friend whose nervous because she's trans and dating this guy who she hasn't told yet because they've only been on a two dates. For this story let's call the friend Jane and the guy she was dating Jason. Happy ending don't worry.

So I tell Jane to bring her boy over to a bbq I'm having and she can tell him she's trans at my place surrounded by queer and trans people who love her and will support her if he ends up being awful.

She waits till the end of the bbq to tell him the news, by which point the rest of us have learned that Jason is a kind, friendly, empathetic, hard working, dummy. So we sit down, all of us a little worried about this gym bro's reaction when she tells him she's trans, and that she understands if he doesn't want to keep dating her it's no big deal.

He's baffled, so we explain what trans is, and after the disclosure that she hasn't had bottom surgery yet...

"Oh you have a dick?"

"... yeah."

He look's around at the room full of people with baited breath, his clearly a little afraid girl friend says

"Oooohhhh! I get it! You think- don't worry Babe! Watch this!"

And ya'll this man jumps up, runs into the kitchen and returns with one of the bratwurst we had for grilling and proceeds to tilt his head back, put it down his throat, hold it in his mouth for a moment, and spit it up without even a whisper of a gag and then looks around at the group absolutely beaming with pride.

My mans saw his worried girlfriend and her support network and thought to him self "Oh they don't think I can't please my girl, but I'll show them!"

[nealashitposts]

I do feel the need to add that later he excitedly tell the group that as a straight guy, he never thought that skill would be useful outside hotdog eating contests.

[hyperrbolic-orange]

"Man its too bad that im straight since I've got like no gag reflex and all."

"Honey, I must tell you, i am in fact trans and I have not had bottom surgery."

"My god... everything's coming up Jason."

[dancinbutterfly]

Pure of heart dumb of ass hetero of sexual

[mytearsrricochet]

[leggywormy]

It's end of May, yall know what that means

[beowulfstits-archive-deactivate]

I want to go to this exact point and run around it saying “I’m in Sweden!” I’m in Finland!” “I’m in Norway!” until I get tired

i aspire to great things in life

[therothwoman]

According to Google Maps, that point is in the middle of a small lake.

[leda74]

So we’ll do it in January when it’s frozen.

[nightmigrations]

actually that’s why they’ve helpfully dropped a big-ass cement block with a bridge surrounding it in the middle of the lake: for the express purpose of doing what OP aspires to do

[slaughtermetals]

there’s so much beauty in the world.

[illbeanisland]

There’s also a point like this which connects Germany, Belgium and the Netherlands!

They even made a circle there which tells you in which country you are

[consultwithmouse]

And the tripoint of Slovakia-Austria-Hungary 👋😊

[mist-the-wannabe-linguist]

the tripoint of czechia, slovakia and poland is just A Rock In A Ditch lmao

[sappy-the-creature]

Happy pride month!

Be nice to queer people pretty please!!!!!!!

[thegoodmorningman]

Good Morning!!! IS THAT A QUESTION!?!?!

[brainstreams]

[my-dailydreams]

[byjove]

Sometimes I see people from countries with public healthcare systems post videos that are like “This is the reality of socialized medicine. I had to wait in the ER with my sick baby for 4 hours.” “I had to wait 8 months to see a specialist. That’s egregious.” or “They didn’t have a bed for my loved one in mental health treatment.” and it’s like. Come to America babygirl. You can experience all of this and have your insurance deny it and pay thousands and thousands of dollars for it. Like I know healthcare systems in countries with public health can be bad but when I see someone imply they’re bad because the healthcare is universal, I want to jump through the screen and put my elbow on their throat. “The NHS is deeply flawed, therefore we should abolish it and go back to private healthcare. That will definitely make healthcare in this country better!” I am going to Kill You.

[yellow-cat]

actually hate that the bodys response to anything is nausea. ate too much? nauseous. ate too little? nauseous. an imaginary threat got you scared? be nauseous. on your period? you guessed it. sawed into your hand and need to go to the emergency room? perhaps throwing up into your open wound will be of help

[wifegideonnav]

“bits to use in everyday conversations”

[natalieironside]

Tip for how to be more annoying:

If someone is attempting to ask you questions about politics and you'd rather not engage, feign comprehensive ignorance of whatever they're trying to discuss. And I mean comprehensive; you are not playing the role of a potential convert who just hasn't heard of [issue] yet, but rather that of someone who does not know who the president is. If they name him, you've never heard of such a man in your life. You're not entirely sure what the Supreme Court is but you heard on a podcast or something that it got abolished by the mayor. Who's the mayor? Well, why would I know who the mayor is? Say things like "Who's to say" and "I thought that was from a movie."

If they're still incredulous as to the sincerity of your ignorance, become irate and defensive. Take umbrage with the very notion of common knowledge. Say things like "Look, dude, I don't gotta know every little thing, alright? You show me in the bible where it says it's illegal not to know things."

This is an expeditious and highly effective technique to disencentivize people from speaking to you, if that's something you're in need of

[thememedaddy]

[chronocrump]