bring back the naked chicken chalupa

I'm Sara and I love Taco Bell [Libra]

[fiti-vation]

[femmewitch-deactivated20190613]

[mens-rights-activia]

George...😔✊🏿

[myfairynuffstuff]

[gharibajameel]

horses are inherently funny because they come in so many sizes. like draft horses

this looks so fake. this horses skull is bigger than the dudes entire torso. this horses NECK is thicker than the dudes entire BODY.

and then at the opposite end of the spectrum you have shit like this shetland pony which ALSO looks fake

what the hell happened to this thing who bred this line of ponies to be so ridiculous

[hapalopus]

fun fact, while most mini horses and ponies look fat, like the shetland above, some are genuinely just scaled down versions of regular horses

you look at this and think “wow that’s a horse i bet I could ride that” but you’d be wrong because this is an american shetty and it’s the size of a large dog

also fun fact, this is the world’s smallest horse, thumbelina

and this is the largest horse ever, brooklyn supreme

[catgirl-kaiju]

B R O O K L Y N S U P R E M E

[flowerinaflame]

I’m proud of him

[triplehamburgerjack]

He is just fucking great.

[i-am-jayde-deactivated20230705]

Fat pets who are obviously unhealthy:  Bad

Wild animals who are fat because of humans:  Bad

Wild animals who are supposed to be fat:  Good

Wild animals who have gotten super fat because they’re just that good at survival:  Very Good

[cat-memes-only]

[nonbinary-mungojerrie]

[spectrometrie]

things i made very stoned and don’t remember doing

[shadowpeoplearejerks]

The Great Gatsby

[beardedchrisevans]

[slut4supersoldiers]

Is Chris Evans Steve Rogers or is Steve Rogers Chris Evans?

[casbean]

good

[gunsandfireandshit]

“Fellas, is it gay to be a good father?”

[flower-lesbienne]

Shout out to Harry Hill

[yip-yip]

[ingek73]

I think Piers is somewhat of a national laughing stock by now

[avianawareness]

Jazzly Bear SanGra

[becausebirds]

There is an imposter in our midst.

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

i have a friend whomst I will not name in case they don’t want to be asked about this but they have a Very Specific and Terrible power which is, if you take the online BDSM quiz and then just simply mention you have, they can look at you for under ten seconds and just state your top result.

I can’t tell you anything more soul-shattering, any death more instant and devastating, any moment more harrowing to witness than someone saying “yeah i took the BDSM quiz once” only for my friend to no more than glance at them and then announce “brat” and the look in the person’s eyes is that of one who just tipped too far back in their chair

[the-aro-ace-arrow-ace]

and they say xmen aren’t real

[secifosseluce]

quick, tell me the weirdest compliment you’ve ever gotten. my doctor told me i have impeccable eardrums 

[drakatzen]

my dentist once told me (in an appreciative tone) that i have huge neanderthal-like canine teeth

[secifosseluce]

oh i AM losing my mind over this 

[78nanosieverts]

I have frequently had doctors complain to me that I have tiny ear canals and like

I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with that information besides apologize for providing a subpar patient experience?

[nerdyqueerandjewish]

When I had surgery, the anesthesiologist had me open up my mouth so they could “see what they were working with” when they intubated me and they were like “oh nice, lots of room! [assistant] come look!” And the assistant came to look down my throat and was like “nice” 😂

[yidquotes]

My wife, when we were first dating, told me I reminded her of a walrus, you know, a really pretty one.

[physticuffs]

a dancer once told me i had beautiful achilles tendons. (they are v long, i think. i have always been able to squat with my feet flat on the floor with no practice, which is unusual for americans.)

my doctor told me that my blood pressure is excellent, like yes i’m young and healthy but i have blood pressure out of a medical textbook, and i told my mom that and my mom said oh yes, you have genetically perfect blood pressure. you inherited it from my side of the family.

[despazito]

A mortician told me my skintone is so pale I’d be a pain in the ass to embalm

[eusociality]

A yoga instructor complimented me on having “stretchy hips” - I’m not overall flexible I just apparently accidentally trained myself to be a master of all hip opening yoga poses by sitting in the weirdest ways possible at home.

[ehlbee]

My sonographer exclaimed that I have “the cutest little uterus” while giving me an ultrasound.

[pastrygeckos]

I once went to a doctor for hip pain, she proceeded to lay me down and stretch my legs all kinds of ways, going “wow you’re so flexible, I guess you’re fine”. I’m hypermobile.

[followthebluebell]

I have excellent veins. “Very juicy,” said the nice totally-not-a-vampire nurse taking my blood for a hormonal panel.

[pangur-and-grim]

a hairdresser once got legitimately aggrieved with me because my hair follicles are densely packed (as though if she frowned hard enough I’d relent and space them out properly?)

[drferox]

Obstetrician said I had ‘an extremely functional pancreas, even under challenge’ which I guess was a pleasant surprise.

[toxeh]

When I got my septum pierced, the guy doing it said I had a perfect septum and perfectly aligned nostrils. “Like you have model nostrils. Like you have the kind of nose I would have loved to have trained on. It’s perfect.” (It was small but it actually kinda made me feel really good about myself?????

[hickeywiththegoodhair]

creep on the subway absolutely sloshed at 2 o’clock in the afternoon told me “I like your legs. they look STRONG, they’re footballers legs… they’re almost a bit freakish like”

thanks???????????????????

[orangejulii]

A creepy customer at work told me I have nice elbows.  I was taken off guard and replied, “Well, that’s a new one.”  He said, “Shut up you know you have nice elbows!”

[emperor-ing-deactivated20191108]

good news everybody

[soandsuch]

In this store, you go in, shop, and then walk out carrying the item’s you want to buy, and their facial recognition software figures out who you are and charges whatever items you are taking to your account. It’s incredible and creepy.

[thisurlwasnttakenbutnowitis]

*Walks into the store with anti-facial recognition haircut/makeup and leaves like a bandit*

[putinyoudown]

the cyberpunk dystopia is upon us and it fuckin sucks

[eco-socialism]

Water is wet

[ghostlywriterr]

[feminismandmedia]

So people are making different videos for you to use in uncomfortable situations!

The majority of the Uber ones mention in some way that they have your location on. Some you would pretend are messages someone left on your phone. Some have a script for you to follow along to on screen! Some are specific to who are calling you!

[justyouraveragebloog-deactivate]

THIS IS VERY VERY IMPORTANT

[xxanax-whore]

[benepla-deactivated20180521]

describe your aesthetic in four words go

[kinesthetiachomoromanticore-dea]

homeade bong im 11