dick: remember when you didn’t try to solve all your problems with attempted murder?
jason: stop romanticising the past
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@batfamilyposts
dick: remember when you didn’t try to solve all your problems with attempted murder?
jason: stop romanticising the past
dick: what do you call a fish with no eye?
tim: myxine circifrons
dick:
dick: fsh
Damian: I think Father mixed up our school lunches. Look [holds up a post it that says "I love you so much"]
Cass: Oh, that explains this [reads post it that says "Please be good. For the love of God, be good”]
tim: it must be hard not being able to laugh
damian: i do have a sense of humour, you know
tim: i’ve never heard you laugh
damian: i’ve never heard you say anything funny
jason: am i in trouble?
bruce: take a guess
jason: no?
bruce: take another guess
tim: weird flex but okay
damian, an intellectual: preposterous boast but alas
Duke: today i saw tim crying for five minutes until his alarm went off and he just... stopped crying and went back to work
Dick: wow
Tim: it’s called time management
Dick: sorry it took me so long to bail you out of jail
Jason: no, it’s my fault
Jason: i shouldn’t have used my one phone call to prank call the police
Dick: what are these dead bodies doing here?!?
Jason, nudging one of the bodies: honestly, not much
Damian: it’s almost time to switch from my regular old everyday knives to my fancy Christmas knives.
Tim: there’s a difference?
Damian: yeah, the Christmas ones light up.
Tim, on top of a building: I’m gonna jump!
Damian: Do a flip!
“Who named it ‘parenting’ when they could’ve named it ‘heir conditioning’?”
— Talia al Ghul, about Damian Wayne
Dick: There are three ways to do things: the right way, the wrong way, and the Jason way.
Tim: Isn’t that just the wrong way?
Dick: Yeah, but it’s faster.
Tim: Listen, you’re cute but you’re too enthusiastic.
Stephanie: But I-
Tim: Call me when you realise nothing matters.
Jason: Jesus Christ, is that a gremlin?
Bruce: Jason, that’s Damian.
Jason: Whatever, just nobody feed that fucking thing after midnight.
Jason: Just know that this pro and con list is going to be a waste of your time! The end result is going to be, “Damn, this plan is awesome, that list was pointless. I wasted all that paper and ink. Sorry, trees. Sorry, squids.”
Tim: Wait. Is that where you think we get ink from? Squids?
Jason:
Jason: No...
Tim: Has anyone ever told you what a drag you are?
Damian: Everyone. Constantly.