fuckin twilight yo

eternally stuck in the new moon depression scene blame smeyer for the fact I'm 19, married, and pregnant

[emmettisapowerbottom]

If vampires in twilight enjoy music from when they were human (exemplified by Edward’s love of Debussy) does that mean that Bella is spending eternity blasting Nickelback and Black Eyed Peas?

[bellaissaworm]

Yo so I was in the psych hospital like a month ago to get back on my meds and I just wanted to say that the Freeform Twilight Marathon kept me going hardcore

[helila]

so… Batman, eh?

[bellaissaworm]

Emmett's song on his Myspace profile was boom boom pow by the black eyed peas

[twilight-good-yall-dumb-deactiv]

Twilight Au where everything’s the same except they go to Hollywood Arts. 

[volturian]

Are vampire titties soft or stone hard... like jiggle physics don’t apply... or.... 😳😳😳

[hallowedhuntress]

volturian out here asking the real questions

[volturialice]

ok but the really weird answer would be if everything BUT their titties are hard but the titties are still normal boob texture. like if you taped some water balloons to a statue

[pathokinessis]

[edwardcullenisace]

This has been horrible so far but

I do expect they'd just be like,,, slightly softer. Still some give by vampire standards. Maybe to a human it'd be like,,, the firmess of a football or something idk

[bellasredchevy]

have y’all seen this masterpiece yet

[panlight]

Sometimes I think about Esme and Carlisle talking about the children they can’t have. How they are so grateful for the family they DO have, but how they missed out on raising babies and children because their “children” were already grown when they came into their lives.  And then I think about them watching Edward with Renesmee, and commenting on the things she inherited from him, like her hair and general facial features, and what personality traits she might share with her father, and they talk about how that must be an extraordinary thing, to look at this life you created and see parts of yourself and your partner reflected back, and what traits their theoretical (yet impossible) biological children might have had.  And then Esme sighs a little and says something like, “You know, our children did inherit something from you.” Carlisle looks at her quizzically, not quite following. Surely vampirism doesn’t count, and he didn’t create Alice and Jasper anyhow…  Esme smiles indulgently. “They all have your eyes.” 

[jasperwhitlocksssss]

what if i was a local girl who liked making mud pies and you were the cute boy that lived on the reservation in town and we were best friends and some dumb mormon bitch DIDNT write our characters 😱😳🤪😍😉

[volturialice]

welcome to my new streaming service it’s called Twilight+ and it’s where you pay me $12 to come to my house and watch the baseball scene from Twilight (2008) on an endless loop

[tlirsgender]

I think realizing that canon is fake is very freeing actually

Like genuinely all fiction is equally fake and real simultaneously. The author is dead and I'm getting my inheritance

[ms-demeanor]

The author is dead and I'm getting my inheritance.

[bellaissaworm]

I birthed a child n didn't wake up up hot. Breaking dawn lied to me

[nintendogmama]

Nobody asked for these, but who am I to deny the world of what we really need

[edwardsvirginity]

Jessica (while she and Mike are "off" again for the 3rd time): guys only want one thing and it's disgusting

Bella (nodding sagely): Marriage.

[lunastwilightblog]

If vampires make a loud noise when they collide, sex must be hella loud

[vampiric-daydreams]

the real reason they need them thunderstorms

[phil-dwyer-stan-account]

Okay but I always think about that part of the Short Second Life of Bree Tanner where she describes the sound of vampires kissing as just two pieces of stone brushing against each other. And I HATE it. Like it makes sense but oh god I hate it.

[bellasredchevy]

y’all ever think about how charlie went through the exact same thing with renée that bella went through in new moon with edward except his edward never came back and he didn’t have a jacob to pull him out of that darkness and on top of that within an extremely short period of time he lost his daughter and his parents too from horrifying and prolonged illnesses because i do every goddamned day

[pathokinessis]

Stop making me cry you whore

[breakingisabella]

friendly reminder: please do not ever hit one of my posts with a “i’m not even a twilight fan but” like no get away believers only