Aborted obama: I would’ve loved to be clear

blake kathryn
One Nice Bug Per Day
YOU ARE THE REASON
wallacepolsom
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
we're not kids anymore.
Three Goblin Art
occasionally subtle
Sade Olutola
Monterey Bay Aquarium

Andulka
Xuebing Du
i don't do bad sauce passes

tannertan36
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AnasAbdin

@theartofmadeline

Love Begins

Janaina Medeiros
Mike Driver

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@between-context
Aborted obama: I would’ve loved to be clear
i wish i could see this picture for the first time again
Every time I see some gamerbro edit of a female video game character to make her 'prettier', I always see something I have mentally dubbed Cockroach Wife Syndrome (in honor of the guy who accidentally conditioned himself to only be aroused by a fantasy of his cockroach wife Ogtha).
That is to say, there is a certain subset of gamerbro who interacts so rarely with real women, that his primary touchstone for how women look is fiction: often video games and anime. So when a video game woman looks too realistic--too close to having traits that one might find in real flesh and blood women--this is foreign to them. This is unattractive. They have been jacking it to hentai and blender animation porn for too many years, and have inadvertently conditioned themselves to only be sexually aroused by the exaggerated cartoonish traits of animated women.
So now every time I see one such edit, I can't help but think. My. What a coincidence you've made her look more like an anime waifu. Truly dedicated to your cockroach wife.
You can’t just breeze over something like “the guy who accidentally conditioned himself to only be aroused by a fantasy of his cockroach wife Ogtha” without at least linking a 20 minute video breakdown of this man’s descent into madness.
okay the Ogtha thing caught my attention and I needed to know more so here are the original reddit posts, in which Op pretends to have sex with, and then marry, a giant sentient roach lady called Ogtha:
PART ONE
PART TWO
Fall Guys are like invasive among us! Right guys! Who's with me! Who's with me!
Funny 👍
wowww smiling friends referenced chris chan that's amazing sweetheart have you given any more thought to that barnes and noble job application i think there's an opening for little creeps who hold everyone around them socially hostage
Watchmen and The Dark Knight Returns came out at roughly the same time and can be conceived as having roughly the opposite opinions on the dynamic between Superheroes and the State. Watchmen- written from some stripe of left-anarchist perspective- holds thats Superheroes would be at best ineffectual at addressing society's underlying systemic problems and at their worst would be directly, gleefully complicit in the institutional malfeasance that creates those problems. The Dark Knight Returns, written from a right-libertarian perspective, advances that in the face of institutional collapse in the face of apocalyptic nuclear war, the figure of The Superhero would be the last functioning institution as everything else goes belly up, the last guy around with the willpower and clarity of purpose to actually get anything done instead of grabbing the bag and running for the hills. In Watchmen the machinery of state doesn't give a shit about the Masks; in The Dark Knight Returns the machinery of state cannot suffer the Mask to live, because of how the Mask puts the lie to the legitimacy of that state just by virtue of continuing to be themselves when it hits the fan.
Despite the obvious political daylight between these positions, Alan Moore exhibits intense professional and artistic respect for what Frank Miller was going for with TDKR in his 1987 write-up for Twilight of the Superheroes; most specifically he praises the act of actually closing out the myth, and the aesthetic commitment to writing in a mythological register when writing the story of Batman's last stand. Here's Beowolf vs the Dragon, here's Robin Hood firing off an arrow to mark his burial site, and here's the Feds dropping the ten-ton hammer on Batman because they cannot suffer a great man to live. But what's equally interesting is how Twilight of the Superheroes proceeds to embrace TDKR's thesis about Superheroes as The Ones Holding The Line As We Fuck Everything Up and reframes it as a horror story from a left wing perspective.
The premise of TOTS isn't that the Capes launched a coup- it's that they just stuck around through the collapse of late stage capitalism, made themselves visible as the most consistent and unconditional source of support in times of crisis, and thus proceeded to personally form the core of emergent regional governments centered on where they happened to live. And in the process they basically recreate feudalism by accident and to some extent against their will. And now Batman's cast as the anarchist revolutionary out to depose of all gods and masters and restore power to the people. We were within spitting distance of Left-wing TDKR that that was nonetheless equally Weird About Women
*me when my failed clone that came out half the size of me and aged 10x as quickly due to a miscalculation of the biomass needed and numerous genetic errors escapes my basement lab during a romantic dinner and my date sees it and asks what the fuck that thing is* "oh, little old me?"
I like how the homestuck pilot stuff is just giving everyone a rude awakening that a lot of indie creators know each other and respect each others work and that your individual cringe does not exist in a vacuum. And that at the end of the day you’re all clowns.
united we stand
close enough, welcome back superwholock
rayne what’s homestuck about?
"The only woman with the word “submissive” in her profile is seeking a relationship and/or business partner to team up with her for her dream venture, “Pizza Tomb.” Pizza Tomb is a theme restaurant where “the gimmick is that the pizza is served on a hollow pyramid-shaped platter placed atop the customer’s head, requiring the customer to eat his or her way out,” she writes. The Pizza Tomb is currently lacking a dominant male figure: “Overly-effeminate and submissive men sicken me,” she writes."
So cute
Yeah Mr. Darcy’s proposal was a complete turd and a half but you gotta understand. You got your life together. A good career, stable income, retirement plan, all that shit together. And you meet this girl. And she’s everything. Clever, outspoken, funny, calls you on your bullshit. Grade A cutie, right? And she doesn’t go out of her way to spend time with you but she’s nice, and sometimes you catch her looking your way in a way that makes you think you might have a shot.
But her family. Holy shit.
First off, it’s p much ALL women, and mostly UNMARRIED women, which at this time means of something happens to her dad then you’re financially responsible for like. Four grown ass adults, potentially forever
Because mom in law is DEFINITELY gonna need someone to take care of her when dad in law kicks it, and they have like. NO money. So already you’re accepting that if all goes well, you’re gonna be one random old bag’s retirement home. That’s expensive and exhausting, yeah? Imagine asking someone on a first date knowing that if they say yes and things go good her high-strung chihuahua mother is gonna move in with you. IMAGINE.
And girly’s other sisters. Well, one is a sweetheart, yeah, so she probably won’t be an issue, but that still leaves three more, and two of those ones are INSUFFERABLE. Never went to school, dumb as rocks, spend cash like it’s toilet paper
And while one of the two is young still and might grow out of it the OTHER one is actively torpedo’ing her entire family’s reputation by wandering off with random dudes and chasing ass. She’s never gonna work, she can’t build connections, she’s a fucking sinkhole, and she’s being led on by the same goddamn con man ass leeching tit who’s been bleeding you dry while telling anyone who’ll listen that your family is full of ratty thieving bastards.
And if he dumps her after a week- WHICH YOU KNOW HIS BITCH ASS IS GONNA- you’ve got a SECOND UNMARRIABLE GROWN ASS ADULT TO PROVIDE FOR. And you KNOW she’s gonna be a tantrum-throwing little shit about it, and it’s not like you can lock her in the basement or something, you’re gonna have to bring her fucking. Everywhere. And give her an allowance and shit while she contributes zero, because again, she NEVER GOT EDUCATED AND HAS NO MARKETABLE SKILLS. She’s not even good to TALK to. FUCK
And you’re looking at this girl’s father like “please for the love of fuck get your spawn under control, marry them off, get them working on their résumé, learning to sew or be nursemaids or manage staff or SOMETHING, yall got no money and one foot in the grave” and that old man just laughs like “haha yeah, what can you do. lol”
So you’re looking to the mom and finally it’s making sense how she got that twitch in her eye and as MUCH as she is you’re starting to realize she’s the SMART one, desperately throwing her armloads of girls at random men like they’re a bunch of fucking lifeboats bobbing around a sinking ship, like yes Jesus Christ sweetly that life boat IS old and ugly and kind of boring but for FUCKS SAKE PICK ONE
And you look back at this girl who is ALSO REFUSING THE LIFE BOATS BY THE WAY and god damn it she’s still the most radiant thing you’ve ever seen so fine, fuck it, Christ alive, you’ll do it. You’ll shoot your shot. She’s everything you’ve ever wanted in anybody abut it’s not even just about that anymore, it’s about being her best fucking shot at a future, and even if she doesn’t like you all that much she’s still gonna say yes and that might break your heart a bit knowing it’s about the money but who knows, maybe it will at least be civil, or companionable, and even if she doesn’t LOVE you at least you’ll know she’s well and cared for
And so you’ll do it. You’ll take on the neurotic stress mess mother in law, the absent father, the broke ass wingnut no brain no money no future airhead sisters, the bad mannered relatives and the embarrassing behaviour and the impending future of sharing your entire shit with a clown parade of freeloaders, you’ll risk it all and accept the absolute certainty of financial ruin and emotional exhaustion for the rest of your whole ass life and you’ll make your own family deal with it too, you’ll do it, you’ll fucking DO IT, you stupid lovesick motherfucker
And so you go to this chick like “look. Your whole family’s a shitshow. You’ve got fucking nothing and you’re gonna die on the street. But for some reason- and I don’t get it either- I’ve fallen in love with you, and I wish I didn’t, but I did, so I’m telling you that whether you like me or not, I’ll give you everything. I’ll give you everything even if it’s the dumbest shit I ever done. Fuck my stupid Baka ass, I’ll marry you.”
And she looks at you- having heard or considered absolutely none of your months-long internal debate and monologue- and goes “The fuck did you just say about my family, you son of a bitch?”
And the shock of that is enough to jolt you back into a reality where you are able to actually hear and process what just came out of your damn mouth And yeah
Yeah, I think I kinda get it
“im gonna put that old man in a situation” and then the old man is 35 and the situation is heterosexual marriage. get real and put werner herzog in a saw trap or stop wasting my time
you should do a monstery take on 2d from gorillaz if ur familiar with him
I uhMisread this.Well enjoy!!!
“you’re never gonna believe this” buddy i was a mormon for 16 years. if i could believe that im pretty sure i can believe whatever horseshit youre about to say. actually forget about it, howsabout we both save ourselves some time and i just give you $5. there we go. get outta here you lil scamp.
Are we not gonna talk about the source filmmaker banner
How much more proof do we need lol
HOW MUCH MORE PROOF DO WE NEED
More proof
this has been done a hundred times and I'll say it again-
I mean literally.
Red Oktoberfest
As a Heavy, repeatedly kill someone in honor of your Medic.
Back 2 back. Kill a heavy/medic pair within 20 seconds of eachother. It's a broken, bleeding heart.
Cosmetic for Heavy: Keep little healing man close.
While the Pocket Medic is also available for Soldier, the Pocket Heavy is only available for Medic.
Plus just look at this workshop thumbnail.
And then there's this as I checked the wiki:
Another addition 😎
And of course 😎
How could I forget 😎
Tons of specific heavymedic achievements
All these lines lol, and:
Also, they way heavy says these lines are adorable, he seems to have pure affection in his voice
This whole video
“The hairs on your head-skin”, kinda looking at a bald individual 👀 (also, stop being so weird medic lmao)
This beautiful post as further explanation of the cosmetic above
Thank you for adding that to the masterpost of heavymedic,,, it's beautiful
I can’t believe I forgot this Oml
THIS
THIS VIDEO, Omg why didn’t I put this as #1 lmao
On the TF2 website
More suggestive heavymedic art by Makani, the official tf2 comic artist
I'm sorry, I can't NOT reblog the HeavyMedic master post if I see it.
The ship long post
it doesn't actually bother me when people tag their blorbos in the tags of my anecdotes - going to tumblr dot com and complaining about the fandoms is like moving next to a farmer and complaining that the fertilizer smells like cowshit (it is) - but i like giving people shit about it anyway. like if youre gonna tag every story about me and my wife as "anakin and padme" its only fair that i get to go to your blog and ask how it makes you feel, having the same pairing preferences as george lucas.
i think thats a fair trade. and. just so you know. you're a coward for blocking me over it. tch.