Maybe I was just never made to have a healthy relationship

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@billybob-99
Maybe I was just never made to have a healthy relationship
There is no inbetween
I WANT TO GET FAKING WASTED OMG I NEED IT SO BAD
I just want to get drunk and let go I want to lose control I want to really feel … I need a friend that would do that with me
all the roads lead back to the loneliness ive felt ever since i was a child
Why does everyone hate me I try and try to get people to like me to morph into the version they would want me to be so they would maybe like me but no matter what I do no one ever wants to be my actual friend 
I wish people supported me the way I supported them I’m sick of being a one-sided cheerleader
Ppl are so fake like be fr I’m just trying to make friends ppl act like they like me then ghost me when I try and make plans am I that unlikable fuck me ig
my love <3
I wish I could enjoy eating like I did when I was young now it’s all just a war in my head
I wanna hurt myself so fucking bad ahhhh but I can’t bc it’s so fucking hot out I can’t hide it 😡
Ripping out my hair because I want to talk to them but I don't want to be a bother so I'm stuck in uh is limbo of just waiting for them to text me
Me finding who put that c@ls in everything
I know he's busy but why can't he respond, I'm on the verge of relapsing and I need him to help me out. I hate this.
I hope I hit a vein.
trying to remember things is so difficult. like did that happen or am i making it up?
Far too obsessive for my own good
I wish I wasn't so sick in the head
I want to be able to love someone properly