BILLY MAYS HERE!

Leo (they/them) nb lesbian (White/Jewish) I'm 25 and I love dinosaurs

[billymayslesbian]

[vengeancect]

[blemgoid]

yo mama so hungry... her belly grumbling could wake the dead!

follow for more yo mama facts

[blemgoid]

yo mama so hungry... the grumbling of her belly could wake anyone from even the deepest slumber!

[blemgoid]

yo mama so hungry... a grumble of her belly could wake skeletons, dracula, and more!

[blemgoid]

yo mama so hungry... when her belly grumbled, frankenstein sat up and went "what was that sound?"

[blemgoid]

yo mama so hungry... the grumbling of her empty belly caused quite a stir!

[blemgoid]

yo mama so hungry on an airplane... her belly grumbles were mistaken for turbulence, and the other passengers left posthaste!

[blemgoid]

My dearest companion,

It is with utmost urgency that I commit to paper an occurrence so singular that I fear it may strain your credulity. I trust this message finds you in sound health and undisturbed repose, for I cannot say the same of those unfortunate enough to dwell within the vicinity of yo esteemed mama.

Having, by circumstances too tedious to recount, passed the evening beneath her roof, I was shortly after midnight awakened by a most dreadful and prolonged rumbling, so profound in its depth that I mistook it first for distant cannonade, then for an earthquake, and finally for the Last Trump itself. Imagine my astonishment upon discovering the disturbance emanated not from Heaven or the deepest bowels of Hell, but from the singularly vacant stomach of yo good mama.

The tumult was of such prodigious force that every sleeper in the household sprang from his bed in confusion. Even the old groundskeeper, who I know for a fact has slept through thunder-bolts and musket fire alike, emerged from his shack demanding to know who had sounded the alarm.

I entreat you, dear friend, to prevail upon yo mama to partake of a modest supper before retiring, lest her entire estate be compelled to awaken at the command of her insatiable stomach.

I remain, with every sentiment of esteem,

Your most obedient and humble servant,

yo mama facts

[blemgoid]

yo mama so hungry... the grumbling of her empty belly can be heard from very far away!

[blemgoid]

yo mama so hungry... the grumbling of her empty belly once set off an earthquake detector!

[blemgoid]

yo mama so hungry at sea... her belly grumbling can be heard by the fishes whales sharks and amphibiens under the water!

[styofa]

cold days

[chestnutroan]

forget-me-not

[its-kerington]

[teratocrat]

paying hundreds of thousands of dollars for experimental elective dental surgery where they fill my mouth with shark teeth so i can give worse blowjobs

[mindovermutant]

Did you know you can buy Pepsi in aluminum or glass?

[godkissedme]

yak napping beside qinghai lake

[upsettingandunfortunateclasshate]

My son's tattoo hurt me deeply

When Tess Morgan's son came home with a tattoo, she was griefstricken. She knew her reaction was OTT (he's 21) but it signalled a change in their relationship

This is gold this, absolute gold, the most over the top melodramatic hysterical ridiculous thing I’ve ever read

[brawlcloud]

This is actually so interesting to read- it’s from 2012 but its full of the same anxieties, even some of the same phrasing that many of the guardian’s later pieces on transness use. really hammers home how much of the terfism that emerged in the late 10s was middle class mothers angry at a loss of control over their adult children- whether that be their bodies or their friends or their opinions- and making that everyone’s problem because they have the power to do so

[monkey-cat-vivi]

He says, “I’m still the same person.”

I look at him, sitting there, my 21-year-old son. I feel I’m being interviewed for a job I don’t even want. I say, “But you’re not. You’re different. I will never look at you in the same way again. It’s a visceral feeling. Maybe because I’m your mother. All those years of looking after your body – taking you to the dentist and making you drink milk and worrying about green leafy vegetables and sunscreen and cancer from mobile phones. And then you let some stranger inject ink under your skin. To me, it seems like self-mutilation. If you’d lost your arm in a car accident, I would have understood. I would have done everything to make you feel better. But this – this is desecration. And I hate it.”

[prokopetz]

It's funny how in the last couple of years several major social media platforms have quietly removed "this user appears to be a bot" from the list of valid reasons to report a post on their abuse forms. I wonder what might have have motivated that particular change.

[kaylmao]

has anyone seen my pet bacteriophage its name is styrofoam and its about [hand touching the floor] this tall

[porcelain-dollbones]

snakes really make you appreciate how gross mammals really are. squamates are very dry and clean

[porcelain-dollbones]

a bird is a kind of reptile that has learned to be yucky.

[dogpuppy]

[geniusoflove]

good god when the mr clean magic eraser hits the stove......

[proheromidoriyashouto]

the panties hit the floor

[geniusoflove]

you know it brother

[an-american-whore]

Cant tell you how many times I rawd*gged my husband after I caught him using a magic eraser to clean the pasta sauce I burned onto the burner like some kind of primordial insect

[geniusoflove]

you know what i wish you would tell me

[emotargaryen]

one of the tweets of all time to me

[pistol-kitten]

i was just trying to find a post, man