Just Random Stuff

[dogpuppy]

[luna-azzurra]

Nobody warns you that writing a slow burn means YOU also have to suffer for 300 pages waiting for them to just kiss already

[skippyisntfunny]

[bisexual-engineer-girl]

Pulitzer Prize type shit

[wizardshark]

Why's this dude built like crash bandicoot

[spooky-narwhal]

Everything about this damn post is so funny to me. The lighting of the arm from the flash. The posing of the arm like a dramatic death from a novella. The fact the photo somehow got taken still and looks this good. The subreddit name. The fact this guy really is built like crash bandicoot

[animentality]

[girldraki]

[girldraki]

[pris-cas]

“Lesson #2 endurance: persistent Hunting”

I headcanon that Eridians, tho fast sprinters, haven’t evolved to be long distance runners because of their cardiovascular system. So seeing a human run easily for more than a couple of minutes freaks them out.

Also Huge Thanks for all the love on my last post!! I’ll definitely be making this into a series!!

Lesson #1 Next Lesson

[ooo-silly-worms]

Pottery sounds terrifying to me. Every post I see is like "Here's this awesome art I made!! Pray for me that it survives The Kiln™ :')" I don't think I could cope with making art that could quite easily blow up and I have no way of controlling that. You guys are true heroes.

[claypigeonpottery]

@bazanite you are so correct

[creativepromptsforwriting]

Reactions to... the other being jealous

"Aww, you don't have to be jealous."

"Do I detect some jealousy there?"

"You don't have anything to worry about."

"I'm yours, remember?"

"Don't be jealous. There is no reason for that."

"I kind of enjoy you being like this."

"Is it bad that I like your jealousy a tiny bit?"

"I feel really flattered."

"Why did you act like that?"

"This is not like you. What's going on?"

"Oh, jealousy looks good on you."

"You're not allowed to be jealous. Not after everything that happened."

"Promise me you will talk to me next time, ok?"

"Stop it. You have nothing to worry about."

"Jealousy is a normal feeling. Just don't let it consume you."

"Hey, if I said or did something that made you feel insecure, please tell me."

"I would shut the whole world out, before I shut you out. No need to worry."

"I don't want anyone else, I only want you."

"Come on, you don't have to fight for me. I'm already yours."

"I know you don't trust easily. But I swear to you, you can trust me."

More: Reactions to… Masterpost

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[fiona519]

My cutie patuties

[voronlsan]

My final full-length work. It turned out beautifully. I worked so hard on this drawing

Take a closer look at these beauties

[skeletalroses]

We need the Mythbusters back now more than ever to teach science and critical thinking, and every episode should include a segment where Adam and Jamie get to beat RFK Jr. mercilessly with any weapons of their choosing. As a treat.

Additionally or alternatively, they use him as Buster

[the-haiku-bot]

Additionally

or alternatively, they

use him as Buster

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[calamitytherian]

Here, have a concept drawing. (Oh goodness, tumblr fr ruined the quality)

I was just trying a sort of painted look... I like it.

[calamitytherian]

....you are mostly right wtf.

The actual reason for it was when he was passive, he had believed that Dream no longer cared for him, so he developed the disease. The apple incident was his failed attempt at regaining Dream's love; luckily for him, the corruption slowed the disease's progression (since it is difficult for anything to survive that much negativity), but Dream believed he was a parasite controlling his body, thus worsening his condition until one day, long after the gang had passed (they also aided in the slowing of the disease), he returned to Dreamtale and just gave up. Since he can't die, his body remains at the stump of the Tree of Feelings for the rest of eternity, dead in every way but literally.

[blumineck]

I got to try some new archery, and I LOVE IT!

Huge thanks to Richard, Emily, Wojtek, and everyone else out here who let me learn with and from them, and were willing to put me on a horse with a bow. And massive thanks to Santos for letting me sit on his back and shoot arrows!

[beardedmrbean]

Periscope up

[birds-in-posts]

Green heron (Butorides virescens)

[flareonfloof]

birds have secret bones we're not allowed to know about

[pigeonstab]

Draw Cross beinh his happiest in a suit of armour

Expression hidden. body protected. waist snatched.

[pris-cas]

“Lesson #1 how far can humans see”

@deltatxt made this into a fanfic!! It’s awsome!! Go check it out!! Blinking in the starlight

Lesson #2

[tanoraqui]

that theory that the Arkenstone is a Silmaril…it’s doubly implausible, but imagine if nobody knew. If the dwarves were guarded enough of their greatest treasure that…you wouldn’t even need to hide it from that many people, honestly. Mostly a few elves, and all wizards.

and then Bilbo sidles up to Gandalf like, “Thorin and all are holed up in the Mountain, but I think they’re being nuts, so I…kind of stole the Arkenstone, I think.” And (it’s been thousands of years since the light of the trees was doused save for the precious brilliance locked away in Feanor’s gems, since oaths and blood and war that raged until the skies cracked and the earth shattered, and the little people of the Shire have no memory of it at all) he pulls out a fucking Silmaril.

[tanoraqui]

Gandalf: *spittake*

Gandalf: *hurriedly glances at Thranduil. the king of Mirkwood’s eyes shine with curiosity and greed, but not recognition, nor the terrible lust that overtook Feanor and his sons. right, right, he was never in Thingol’s court while the jewel that Luthien and Beren took was there. we’re good. we’re good for now*

Gandalf: That’s, uh, nice, Bilbo. Put it away, would you?

[tanoraqui]

Gandalf, telepathically(?): EMERGENCY RINGBEARERS ONLY CONFAB NOW

Gandalf: [mental image of a goddam Silmaril in hobbit hands, labelled “thisfuckingrockagain.jpg”]

Galadriel, who watched 95% of her family slaughter everyone within 100 miles for several thousand years over these things, including each other and themselves: no.

Elrond, who was very nearly one of those people slaughtered, and did watch most of his town be killed before he and his twin were kidnapped for a while: Absolutely Fucking Not.

Gandalf: Apparently fucking yes. The legendary Arkenstone-

Galadriel: You’ve got to be kidding me.

Elrond: Thorin Oakenshield has a Silmaril right now?

Gandalf: No, no.

Gandalf: Bilbo stole it.

Elrond: *wordless sputtering*

Gandalf: @Galadriel [information packet: BilboBagginsoftheShire.pdf]

Galadriel: Oh yes, Belladonna’s boy, you were telling me about him last winter. 

Galadriel: Btw, orc+warg army probably coming your way. Spotted it in the mirror last night. Thank goodness we dealt with Dol Goldur at least, huh?

Elrond: No fucking shit.

[tanoraqui]

Gandalf @Gwaihir Windlord: hey, sorry to bother you again, I know it’s nearly mating season. but we have a situation again

Gandalf: [thisfuckingrockagain.jpg]

Gandalf: [oncomingorcwargarmy.jpg]

Gandalf: [flashbacktobadasseaglesinwarofwrathhinthint.mov]

[avelera]

I mean, given that Tolkien retconned “The Hobbit” so Bilbo’s little invisibility ring became an ancient piece of jewelry that controls minds and drives the mighty mad, one can at least understand why it seems plausible that the other shiny white gem that destroys empires and makes the mighty go mad with greed could be linked from his kid’s book to his gigantic early mythology in retrospect??

[crazy-pages]

You know this actually explains a lot about why Gandalf didn’t immediately raise the alarm about Bilbo’s ring out of an abundance of caution. I mean, what are the odds, what are the fucking odds, that this one little hobbit stole both a Silmaril and the Ring of Power? Like, you are Gandalf the Grey and you have already dealt with the heart attack to end all heart attacks because this little innocent fool stole a world war inspiring artifact once. You still get flashbacks every time Bilbo offers to show you something and have to employ all of your angel’s serenity and thousands of years of learned composure not start giBbERinG “ pleaseletitnotbeanotherartifactpleaseletitnotbeanotherartifact”. And then. AND THEN! One day he’s like, “hey Gandalf let me show you this neat ring I found back on our journey”. And on the inside a tiny part of you is screaming “nottheoneringnottheoneringnottheonering” while a more rational part of your brain assures you it could not possibly be the one- “It’s this plain gold ring that’s very precious to me and turns me invisible!”

AND THEN YOU FUCK OFF AND SEARCH THROUGH EVERY POSSIBLE TOME YOU CAN TO PROVE IT CAN’T REALLY BE THE RING OF POWER, SAURON’S RING OF POWER, THAT RING, THE ONE RING, LITERALLY EVERY SINGLE TOME, BEFORE FINALLY FUCKING ACKNOWLEDGING THAT THIS SHIT IS REALLY HAPPENING AGAIN

[countesskittymeow]

@shewhodoesnotexist what says you? :P

[shewhodoesnotexist]

I’ve never been a proponent of this theory, but I gotta admit the idea of Bilbo finding two world war inspiring artifacts is alluring ;D

Next you’ll be telling me Sting is Gurthang

[abrownpanther]

Sting may or may not be Angrist, the knife that Beren used to get the Silmarill off of Morgoth’s crown

[queenofthequillandink]

“Average Hobbit finds at least one world war inspiring artifact when on a journey” statistic inaccurate. The Spiders Took Family, who find a world war inspiring artifact every five feet they step outside the Shire, were outliers and should not have been counted.

[sunderwight]

Bilbo: I’m not a burglar I wouldn’t even know how to be!

Also Bilbo: *trips and grabs seven legendary artifacts on the way down*