he didnt want soup >:(

luke, 24, he/him

[blackthornass]

luke | 24 | he/him | white | just a funny little guy

please follow my cosmere blog @isdalinarhot if you want stormlight content i like to keep it in one place

[solarsyrup]

[TV psychic medium voice] I'm getting something... something penisy....... something like, cock, it could be cock...... it's deeply meaningful...... would fat, engorged cock mean anything to anyone here? balls? it could be balls?

[tearful person from the crowd] no, it couldn't be... but......... my dead cat had balls

[me, nodding plaintively] your cat had balls. and its speaking to us right now.

[qelflinq]

made girl riddler in gta 5 online and wife is telling riddles in the voice chat and everyone hates her so much . this is a multimedia project, we are visionaries bitch

[qelflinq]

she said the man and son car crash female doctor riddle and a guy paused for a few seconds then said “i just have a low iq like I can’t really do this sort of stuff”

[jimbles-archive]

[puppydogsecretblog]

Necessity is the mother of invention, but Horny is the father

[mephistopheles]

i bring a sort of “you should maybe interrogate your so-called ‘preferences’ to make sure they’re not literal textbook examples of severe unconscious bias” vibe that my woke gay friends dont really like

[mephistopheles]

what this post does NOT mean

go out and fuck someone you aren’t attracted to because a stranger on tumblr said to

go out and date someone you aren’t attracted to because a stranger on tumblr said to

You’re Not Allowed To Be Gay Anymore

what this post DOES mean

if you just ‘prefer’ to avoid majority black areas of your city

if you just ‘prefer’ to read, write, think, and talk about men

if you just ‘prefer’ to socialize with people you (perceive as) your assigned birth sex

if you just ‘prefer’ to exclusively watch white-directed movies, read white-written books, listen to white-authored music

if you just unconsciously perceive men as more authoritative/competent and ‘prefer’ to be spoken to by them

this is a post about acknowledging unconscious bias. it is not a post about dating. please stop coming into my inbox and accusing me of rape apologism and telling me to kill myself. thank you

[im-staren]

I'm sad so I made a web weave about it

[rabdoidal]

contender for funniest line delivery in a porno

[a-very-cute-snake]

[enki2]

[androdragynous]

[ID: A tweet by TylerAlterman:

"In the middle of a "forcing party" where friends and I are forcing one another to do the things that we've been avoiding.

So far: [bullet list] A passport has been filed for; An inbox has been zero'd; A personal website has been created; & more.

I recommend this format!"]

[anathemaegg]

call that attending an Executive Function

[sailermoon]

james baldwin was so right when he said “the children are always ours, every single one of them, all over the globe; and I am beginning to suspect that whoever is incapable of recognizing this may be incapable of morality.”

[tongue-twists]

btw dating sucks as a concept.

[tongue-twists]

meeting up with someone with the explicit goal of figuring out whether or not you want a relationship with them spoils the dynamic. it sucks. it's terrible. fall in love with your friends like normal people.

[tongue-twists]

as expected this one is a hit with the autism website

[yeah-yeah-beebiss-1]

Visit Original Link

leaked audio from the long-lost holiday classic, Holy Fuck It’s The Gunch

[yeah-yeah-beebiss-1]

looks like it’s that time of year again folks

[wanologic]

10% of danny rumors on campus are 100% true

[sharkodactyl]

when a friend comes into my dms to be a little hater...such a treasured feeling. it's like a beautiful fawn approaching my outstretched hand in the forest and sniffing it so gently with its little nose before sucking in a deep breath and launching into a rant about all the things it hates about a piece of media that it can't say in public lest it be shot. by like a bow and arrow or something idk i've lost the metaphor

[willgrahamscock]

a ​past url is kind of like a dead wife

[willgrahamscock]

now I’m curious, what’s everyone’s dead wife url mine is assbuttsinburgatory

[noodles-07]

asking for praise for a thing you made feels so humiliating like oooh look at me I’m a little animal and I did a trick and made a thing can I have pets and treats about it. and then somebody tells you it’s good and you understand why golden retrievers are the way they are