Calm Before the Storm @blackthornrook - Tumblr Blog

Posts

Forgot that I can pin posts so here's a quick rundown of my sideblogs:

@shiny-goodsola for general aesthetic/nature photography reblogs

@fluorescefluorite for neon aesthetic/cool gifs

@goodsola-writes for my writing (mostly poetry)

@sp00kylady for witch/tarot/crystals (if you want to commission a reading that's the best place to reach me)

(18+ followers can visit a secret bonus sideblog)

follow me on bluesky @blackthornrook

heartpdf

i wanna live my life not survive it

footlongdingledong

idk man not to sound like a cartoon hippie but if your entirrrrre blog and dash is about how the world sucks and everyones bigoted i think you are going to give yorself brain worms

footlongdingledong

"ah but all of this is important and true and if i dont reblog all of this important stuff waga baga THE WORMS! THATS WORMS! THE BRAIN WORMS!

footlongdingledong

i do not think you are doing activism chief i think what you are doing is sitting in your room flagellating yourself expecting something to happen

lesslaivyy

vitchuatlocalhost-deactivated20

seashellronan

guys i’m so sorry to say this but exercising and indulging in hobbies rather than scrolling on your phone for 200 hours actually does improve your mood and overall mental health, this has deeply upset me more than anyone

creekfiend

i think many people read a level of hostility into my responses to certain interactions that is not there, because they are used to the level of hostility being displayed towards ME being normalized. many, many interactions slide by with a veneer of "socially acceptable" simply because we have normalized the idea of people constantly champing at the bit to determine if they personally Approve or Disapprove of your personal life choices. this is actually not a premise I accept. i will not respond well to attempts to engage me which are engineered to make me defend myself to strangers, and I think it shows a PROFIUND level of disrespect and self involvement to think that I would give a single solitary fuck what a rude stranger online has to say about my life choices. i make decisions very thoughtfully and using many types and sources of information. i seek this information out purposefully, from sources that I respect and trust, and I spend quite a lot of time discussing these decisions with people in my life who have much more knowledge, information, and experience in these subjects than I do. and certainly more than any internet rando who thinks their opinion should hold weight with me.

these interactions are RUDE. it is NOT acceptable to treat people this way. this contributes to some of the least healthy social environments wherein people are constantly looking over their shoulders in fear that whoever has the most social power will enact coercive control bullshit cloaked in "disapproval" in order to punish them. i have less than zero tolerance for this behavior.

i have a lot of sympathy for people who engage in this behavior bc they come from spaces where it is normalized. this is not a behavior that is engaged in only by some sort of specific type of Bad Person. it is behavior that is incentivized in shitty social spaces, and that unfortunately includes A LOT of society. people who default to this sort of interaction, i wish you a very "find social spaces where people don't use judgement and coercive control to keep people in line."

my blog is one such social space. the price of entry is not fucking speaking to me like that.

the decisions other people make in their lives will make you feel varying degrees of discomfort, often. for various reasons. these feelings are of course valid but they are not the responsibility of the people whose choices you are reacting to. trying to use those feelings to Enforce Acceptable Behavior in others is insufferable at best and frankly a nasty little symptom of white supremacy at worst. this sort of social environment is not a natural outcome of interacting with people who make different choices than you would make. it is an outcome of being in social spaces where authority and hierarchy are valued and enforcing the One Correct Way To Do Things is something that is done via punishment. I'm not here for it and I won't pretend to be.

creekfiend

i think some skills that are extremely important to develop that a lot of people in spaces I am adjacent to do not yet have are 1. the knowledge and acceptance of the fact that there are countless multitudes of ways for human beings to arrange and live their lives; there is a huge diversity of human social norms 2. viewing your own accepted social norms as the litmus test for whether people are Behaving Acceptably is an act of supremacy 3. to this end it is very important to figure out how to determine what behaviors legitimately cause harm. understand that your answer to this question will be different than other people's, based on differing values. 4. understand also that "I must DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS" as a response to your own discomfort with someone else's choices is an impulse borne of a desire for control.

iliothermia

#I'm DERANGED about this #what the hell #the textures.............#the colors

vintageandroid

i made a post like this before but I can't find it now. so. I'll just redo it.

What's the first "big news story" you remember from when you were a kid?

It's something I love to ask mixed-aged groups sometimes because I think it's really interesting to see the responses. I've gotten answers from the Olympics of [whatever year] to Watergate to more recent stuff from my niblings.

My first news thing I remember is the OJ Simpson trial. I vaguely remember watching the news with my grandparents before that, but that's the first story I remember, in part because my second grade teacher had us go play so she could watch the verdict 😂

#unfortunately bc I was born in 97 my first Big News Story was 9/11 #super super vague memory of my mother's distress over the 2000 election results but I don't remember the 2000 election cycle #but I was at home watching blues clues when the broadcast got interrupted #then the phone rang #I was sitting on the living room floor in front of the tv #my mother seemed distressed by the phone call #my grandma was in hysterics on the line so my mother sent me into my room #but I hid in the hallway to listen and try to figure out what was happening #at school some time later #my first grade teacher had a world map at the front of the classroom #and she sat us down one morning and explained where Iraq was and what war was and why we were going to war #I said war is stupid and killing people is stupid and she said #yeah but sometimes that's just how the world works #I feel so bad for her every time I think about it #like how are you supposed to explain a stupid pointless war to 5 year olds #awful awful situation

xtec

This is what the average YouTube thumbnail looks like now

noneuclideangarf

spent too long on this

weirdmageddon

i know most people have seen it but i cant emphasize how much this is literally my favorite breath of the wild clip of all time. also i can never fucking find this clip when i need it especially in high definition so here it is

amrv-5

Does anyone know what to do about the temperature and also the prices

nightonblogmountain

dankmemeuniversity

iamoutofideas

Speaking as a transfem that mostly tries to stay out of discourse too, from what I understand it was mainly coined somewhat the way you were figuring, but the fact that it pretty clearly takes its syntax from “transmisogyny” caused some backlash because that term is used to describe an intersection of two types of societal oppression (transphobia and misogyny). And “androphobia” isn’t really anything societally like that bc men as a group aren’t societally oppressed on the basis of being men.

It kind of just ends up feeling like it’s just “transmisogyny for boys” and imo some people have gotten really weirdly mra about it and aggro against transfems who have an issue with it.

I do agree that there are specific experiences that are unique to different parts of the community and it can be useful to delineate, but I don’t know if it’s necessarily a good idea to coopt syntax from a term used to describe an intersection of societal oppression.

Sorry that’s a lot of words oops

no, that makes sense! I do wish there was a better term available. I think "oppression" might feel like a really strong word for it, and it's stupid and pointless to start doing trauma olympics with other trans people when we're all (pardon the term but it feels accurate) degenerate according to the state. Still, there is a particular appearance to the set of social fears and struggles that trans men and transmascs face that is distinct in some ways from the struggles that trans women and transfems face, and I don't blame people who are experiencing a new social role for wanting a term for their experience. Taking into account that "passing" is a state of being that's precarious and situational, I would argue that transmascs who don't pass are still at risk of experiencing direct effects of misogyny, and transmascs who do are more likely to experience the kind of gender expression policing that homophobic patriarchal structures create for men.

Cis men run into this policing all the time, but it's a more intricate system than it looks like from the outside, much like how "correct" performances of femininity are socially enforced quietly and unconsciously by cis women. This can be jarring for anyone transitioning in either direction. Encountering a wide gulf between "Real Man" or "Real Woman" and "what I am right now" is frequently a powerful dysphoric feeling, no matter which direction you're approaching from. In medical and legal settings, the risk for discriminatory behavior and barriers to care/service access increases even further.

It's a half-inverted mirror of the struggles that transfems face, and it baffles me why this is producing intracommunity strife rather than empathy and understanding and solidarity. I figure that if someone understands what you're going through, but you privately expect they might not have it quite as bad as you, the strategic thing to do is make an ally of that person and hope that their lower day-to-day stress lets them keep more energy up to help fight for you when things get too bad. If you're on the flipside of that, and you think whoever you're talking to has it worse, you should take on some level of responsibility for helping if/when you're able, simply because that's the kind thing to do for another human being.

Anyway, thank you for your response. it's rough to have calm and grounded discussions about topics like this on this website in particular because some people post fully developed and reasoned arguments with sources, and some people are just writing in their public diary out of raw emotion, and there's no way to know how earnestly held or well-thought out one's beliefs are from a single post until you talk to them. I wish discussions on here were more respectful and curious, but the internet outrage machine is hungry and so everyone has to fight all the time.

#discourse //#long post //

ok. terrible question but can someone catch me up on the whole "transandrophobia" discourse? I assume the term was coined to talk about types of transphobia that specifically applied to transmascs, which I think is theoretically nice because I hadn't encountered a term like that, and different marginalized groups have specific issues that they encounter so it's good generally to have language to describe that... but people keep lumping that in with TERF ideology in posts I've seen about it, for some reason? was it a psyop thing or did some people just get really annoying and MRA about it and ruin a potentially useful term for everyone else?

(for context I live under a rock and usually scroll past discourse posts without reading them because I don't like giving too much of my energy and time to the internet outrage machine)

#like I do think there are issues trans mascs face that other types of trans people do not #just like nonbinary people tend to have a different experience of public transness than binary trans or cis people #so from an academic point I don't see the issue in having a word for that #but I could see how that would turn into oppression olympics because I've straight up seen posts #to the effect that trans men aren't affected by transphobia #which is a batshit take if you've met or talked to a trans man #and idk how it got here

woke up and my whole house smells like a campfire and the aqi is over 300 so I guess I'm not doing shitfuckanything today except lay around

#the goodsola has spoken #wildfire smoke plume #this may be the worst I've seen it here