Untitled

[m0thzie]

so proud of the scum villain being less scummy in The Edification of Shen Jiu I just had to draw this scene from ch 23!! ♡ Twitter version Bonus aftermath of mute!SY speaking:

[whackawhole]

oh my god that’s his baby (bro) alright

[beforetimes]

Foaming at the mouth at the mere mention of role reversal Binghe and Yuan, don't mind me

Also don't mind me just spitballing here, you can take this as a prompt or not! But can you imagine Binghe's reaction to seeing Shen Yuan years in the future, probably still at Jinlan city? Not only is he taking in how different Shen Yuan looks, either in regards to how the abyss changed him or just how he's grown, but Binghe doesn't have prior knowledge that Shen Yuan would live through the abyss.

Can you imagine the shock? The misunderstanding as Binghe doesn't react to anything because he's still processing that his beloved disciple is THERE, he's ALIVE. He was though to be dead for years, but somehow he survived the abyss.

heyyyy anon so glad that i’ve managed to inspire the same obsession in you that’s spawned in me seemingly overnight. anddd i didn’t even consider the possibility of this scene when i came up with this scenario but let me try my hand at what it’d look like… also i know i wrote his name all as shen yuan in this but i only noticed after i finished and i don't want to rewrite. smile. enjoy!!

[og au post here!]

… 

Jinlan city carries with it a chilled breeze, curled up quietly against Luo Binghe’s skin under the edges of his robe, where flesh meets air. Face impassive, mouth a straight line and eyes heavy with poison-bourne-exhaustion only a few hours into the trip, everything spells out the path to his inevitable turning in for the night soon. The sun’s joined in his lulling to slumber, touching the horizon as the sky turns orange from blue. 

Luo Binghe drifts, a reed swaying in the wind by the riverside as he investigates the town, slipping away from Liu Qingge and Mu Qingfang to survey the ghost town in his lonesome. 

Everything is par for the course, almost mundane enough that Luo Binghe feels a muted frustration grab at the epicentre of his chest, wrapped around the raw meat of his heart. Always muted, desaturated and less than every sensation could be, as though Shen Yuan took with him a shred of Luo Binghe. If he were an artist, then Shen Yuan wasn’t just his muse but every hue of colour, enshrined in Luo Binghe’s memory in smudges of peach, white, green, and rosy pinks. 

Of course, Luo Binghe hasn’t felt like much of anything in a long time. Every day feels like going through familiar, pre-determined motions, drifitng in and out of classes with a commitment inspired in him that never possessed him before the Immortal Alliance Conference. Even this mission, a slight deviation from the norm, feels easy enough to slot into a quiet part of his mind, where everything mundane gathers dust. Months, almost years worth of memories tucked away in a damp corner. 

This should be more of the same. Luo Binghe is anticipating nothing else. 

Then—a figure bumps into him, bringing him to a stumbling halt. 

He’s practiced; the figure picks up speed when his gaze passes over them, so Luo Binghe pursues, numbness clenching at the hollow of his chest like a bird nipping fingers. Short bursts of static aimed at his hummingbird heart as he ducks into shadowy alleyways, a maze bringing him eventually to the second story of a seemingly-abandoned home. 

Hand resting on his sword, Luo Binghe creeps up the stairs. Opening to a room, his gaze skips over the furniture in his first sweep before he stills at the sight of the balcony. Silhouette traced against the setting sun, the figure lowers their hood as Luo Binghe unsheaths his spiritual weapon. Its hardly silent, and the figure’s face snaps over to meet Luo Binghe’s eyes. 

Lightning strikes, a shock to the heart. 

Shen Yuan exhales a moment later, and it hurts almost twice as bad. 

“Shizun…” He says, words so quiet he’s almost mouthing them to himself. Cultivation pulled from the equation, Luo Binghe doesn’t think he would have heard them. Here, however, they twist a blade into his palpating, trembling chest. “It’s really you here?” 

He opens his mouth but words loathe to creep past his throat and spill over his teeth. Luo Binghe can only stare, drinking in details he never dared imagine, his disciple last remembered bloodied and sobbing at the ridge of a gorge touched by years Luo Binghe thought Shen Yuan had lost because of his Shizun’s incompetence. 

Gone are the gentle greens and whites of Qing Jing Peak, replaced with navy blue, near black, and charcoal gray robes that layer over themselves thrice over, as though Shen Yuan tries to keep himself warm. His face lost its last vestiges of baby fat, severe green eyes dulled yet still imbued with life. Hair shiny, longer, left in a simple updo unbefitting of Qing Jing Peak’s strict standards. Luo Binghe’s mind wanders back to hazy mornings spent brushing his disciple’s hair before he’s forcefully yanked back to the present. 

“I suppose Shizun suspects this lowly demon to be responsible for the plague?” Shen Yuan asks, unsurprised yet words saddled with inexplicable defeat. “With word from Qing Jing Peak’s immortal master against this one, I suppose there’s no point in dragging out the inevitable trial, though Shizun can decide if this one should dare show his face to the other Peak Lords Shizun’s brought with him.” 

“Shen Yuan,” Luo Binghe manages to croak, mind speeding to such an extent that forcing words out feels like fighting past a hot charcoal shoved down his throat. 

“Or,” Shen Yuan continues, as though uninterrupted, starting to pace in a way so familiar and practiced that any imagined excuses of possession or imitation vanish themselves from Luo Binghe’s mind, “Or maybe Shizun wants to bring this stupid evil demon to the Sect Leader himself before executing him—maybe he wants to claim the glory of becoming Jinlan’s saviour, maybe—maybe Shizun wants this disciples head on a spike, or—“ 

Shen Yuan whips around, eyes burning into Luo Binghe’s with intensity that would unwaver him if he wasn’t already off-balance. Hazy and near-floating, feeling his heart beat outside his frail body. Despite the weight of it, there’s a vulnerable desperation that robs him of breath, too reminiscent of days Shen Yuan spent at the end of Luo Binghe’s bed on days where the world pinned him to the sheets without mercy. Violent and fervent hope seems to overtake Shen Yuan.

“Or maybe Shizun just—? WIll—this one knows that Shizun wants… But everything else has changed, I can— This one—Maybe Shizun wants me to live?” 

“You’re supposed to be dead,” Luo Binghe manages to say, and watches Shen Yuan’s expression freeze before shuttering, scrubbed away from a too-pale face and replaced with a jade-like twist to his lips so cold it feels as though it cuts at Luo Binghe’s skin. 

He reaches out and Shen Yuan flinches. 

You’re supposed to be dead, Luo Binghe thinks, standing days away from home yet able to feel the press of grass and stone under his knees as he stares at a solitary grave in Qing Jing Peak’s bamboo forest. 

You’re supposed to be dead, he thinks, watching Shen Yuan turn from disciple to stranger, any hope in his former student's shoulders deflating until Shen Yuan’s taking up very little space, completely unaware he’s done it at all. 

You’re supposed to be dead, Luo Binghe thinks, remembering every single conversation with Liu Qingge where they both quietly tell themselves there’s no body, there’s always a chance. They both knew they were lying to each other. I mourned you. I mourned you I mourned you I mourned you. 

In the same room, Shen Yuan retreats, and despite being closer than they have been in years, Luo Binghe can feel the channel of one-sided hatred between the two of them grow ever-deeper.

masterpost

[beforetimes]

[continuation of this post]

yuan's transition into qing jing peak is entirely headed by shen jiu and he doesn't care that it looks like favouritism when he brings yuan back months after the official disciple selection day. he brings the child to the peak lord and tells him that he found his brother, thought-dead but thankfully alive, and would he give him a chance to teach him so that they could stay together and not be separated?

which like. i'm sure shen jiu thinks he's being very sneaky for about a moment but i also know that the qing jing peak lord is absolutely aware that this is not entirely altruistic. but they nod and agree and shen jiu starts his slow process of trial by error in teaching yuan.

well, first, at the qing jing peak lord's gently worded suggestion, he gives yuan his last name (the convo went a little like "ah, if this one is your brother, surely you share the same surname?" "...yes. this is shen yuan.")

but after that, the only person who really sees shen yuan on a day-to-day, up close and personal basis is shen jiu, who's taken shen yuan's schooling to be entirely his responsibility. at first its because he needs all the practice he can get in learning to be tolerant of children but after about a year, he realizes that like. he doesn't want these awful teachers on the peak who were so snide to him to get near shen yuan. but thats jumping forward a bit.

shen yuan is a very diligent student. he tries very hard to do everything exactly to shen jiu's liking because he knows the future that is waiting for him if he fails in this endeavour and can't manage to be a cultivator worthy of qing jing peak and shen jiu's disproval is a dangerous thing. he does his best to follow the manual he's given and shadows his 'older brother' in an attempt to pick up some knowledge through osmosis.

shen jiu has barely enough patience for this. every time he sees shen yuan out of the corner of his eyes he can't help but see himself, curled in the corner of an alleyway like a nasty snarling thing. all he sees is desperation that makes him filthy, a will to live thats admirable but irritating, a problem waiting to happen. he looks at shen yuan and sees his mistakes more than anything else because its what he's the best at finding from any prospective disciple.

because he's the only one shen jiu's teaching now, shen yuan bears the brunt of his disapproval and sharp words. slowly getting worn down until everything he does feels like a mistake, he slowly stops progressing, can't get himself to do much.

shen yuan's slipped away on his own time after shen jiu's scolded him for not doing a form properly, feeling the strain on his spiritual energy. he's tired and sore but he knows that he needs to succeed at this—it would just help if he didn't have the worlds worst teacher.

then he hears footsteps behind him and meets yue qingyuan. who is looking at him with wide eyes and immediately asks who he is, what happened, etc. shen yuan answers with the story shen jiu drills him on when they were first on the way back to the sect: he was living with a frail mother who died shortly before shen jiu found him after years of no contact. upon learning the news, shen jiu decided to take him home so he wouldn't be on his own.

yue qingyuan, who knows that shen jiu has no family he has ever known long enough to visit once, let alone over the course of years, knows immediately that this is bullshit, but shen yuan doesn't know that.

either way, he takes this moment to get to know shen yuan. and learns about shen jiu's attempts to learn to teach disciples so he can eventually graduate to the role of head disciple and be next in line to become qing jing's future peak lord. shen yuan gets called away by shen jiu, who doesn't see yue qingyuan talking to the boy while yue qingyuan asks not to mention his name to shen jiu for the time being.

shen yuan agrees, a little awestruck that he's met the future sect leader who seems so kind, and resumes life as normal.

liu qingge is just. an odd outlier. he's the only one who knows the truth of where shen yuan has come from and shen jiu waits and waits and waits for the other foot to drop and nothing happens. he gets frustrated and confronts the man himself just for liu qingge to say he doesn't care where shen yuan came from; on bai zhan peak the only thing that matters is how smart you are. he's never given a fuck about it. shen jiu is—a little surprised. but doesn't show it. just narrows his eyes and threatens and bites before backing away and leaving a fuming but silent liu qingge behind him.

shen yuan and shen jiu eventually get into a rhythm where shen jiu tries to teach shen yuan something and shen yuan, with his knowledge from modern day china with enough experience as a student under much better teachers, starts slowly and slyly offering corrections to shen jiu's way of teaching. which he notices immediately, but shen jiu takes the suggestions in stride either way. shen jiu has convinced himself that shen yuan is trying to get him into the position of head disciple because he wants the protection that the role could bring him through proxy. well, jokes on him, shen jiu thinks. as soon as shen jiu is announced as head disciple he is forgetting about shen yuan entirely because all shen yuan is to him is a tool to make his way up.

shen jiu, after about three years of teaching shen yuan, is announced head disciple. and doesn't immediately abandon shen yuan the way he convinced himself he would three years ago. but he can't find a reason to stay around shen yuan without looking weak and clingy—things he refuses to be, ammo he refuses to give people to manipulate him with—so he starts distancing himself from shen yuan, slowly but surely.

shen yuan, who heard the name shen qingqiu and realized that his brother was the scum villain, feels hopelessness sink into him and concludes that this is just the plot progressing as it normally should, and now there is nothing for him to do but wait for luo binghe to come and kill his brother.

but. and he doesn't know how it happened. he's attached. he loves shen jiu—in the way a dog can love someone who feeds him, a bird loves someone who opens a cage door, a tree can love the spring for breathing new life into it.

shen jiu is mean and abrasive and ambitious. impatient and snappish and doesn't hide these things. he is a schemer and is not afraid to be ruthless to get what he wants. but when shen yuan is scared after waking up from a nightmare, he doesn't say anything when shen yuan kneels by his side late at night, watching him write reports. when shen yuan curls into the space behind shen jiu when a man from another peak comes near on a bad day, shen jiu doesn't push him aside and tell him to stop being weak. when other disciples start pushing shen yuan around, he doesn't stand up for him, but he waits until shen yuan pulls himself up to his feet and brushes dirt off his shoulder before telling him that being strong doesn't mean being kind and letting himself get walked all over for the sake of keeping peace means nothing if he wants to survive. and when shen yuan gets them back, shen jiu turns and leaves to maintain plausible deniability.

which is to say that shen jiu may still be awful, but he's not a villain. and shen yuan doesn't want to see him torn apart.

so comes his new objective, not at all system approved: keep shen jiu alive.

anyway!!! if you have any questions about this au just lmk hahaha i think this is the most i'll write about it on tumblr unless anyone has something really specific they want to know

[beforetimes]

okay i love the aus about shen jiu finding a little shen yuan and bringing him to qing jing peak before slowly warming up to him so here is my take on it! (specifically their first meeting)

shen jiu has been on qing jing peak for about five years at this point. he's vying for the position of head disciple and all things considered, he is a pretty strong contender for the role. there's just one issue his teacher keeps coming back to; how shen jiu will pass down knowledge on qing jing peak.

it's not a stretch to say that shen jiu is a bit. rough around the edges. and sometimes when teaching the younger disciples his own skewed views of how fast or slow they should be progressing leads him to get snappish and cold. trial teaching periods with shen jiu are most of the junior disciples' worst nightmare and the current qing jing peak lord knows well enough that this is something that needs to be rectified.

shen jiu, who knows this is the only real roadblock to becoming a head disciple like he's been trying at for five years, is intensely irritated. and on the verge of losing it, as if he hasn't been on a hair-trigger temper ever since he turned against wu yanzi for yue qingyuan only to not even be granted a reason for him never returning. qi deviations are a begrudginly expected aspect of his life that weaken his warring body in ways that make shen jiu want to scream.

anyway. he goes out on a mission with liu qingge to a far-off town a few months after one of these qi deviations and in the process of chasing away whatever beast or ghost has been bothering this town, they have to walk through the marketplace. it's fairly packed, all things considered, but shen jiu can still tell when his coin bag is lifted off him and the thief snatches away barely a moment later. he's already in a pretty bad mood because of liu qingge being there but he doesn't necessarily want to make a scene and draw the attention of the entire street onto him, so he follows after the child. he keeps an eye on the back of his head to keep track of him while liu qingge whinges on the side about how they need to stay on task and why is shen jiu getting distracted and is he seriously going to a brothel?!

to which shen jiu looks up and realizes that either this child a ) went to this brothel because he felt shen jiu following him and wanted to throw a righteous cultivator off by going into a place he assumed shen jiu wouldn't enter or b ) he lives here and he was just returning 'home.' neither of these options particularly work in the child's favour, considering the fact that shen jiu would just walk in without a care in the world and objectively, a brothel isn't a great place to live.

either way, he clenches his jaw, ignores liu qingge, and walks in to grab the thief and turn him around.

just to come face to face with a child that looks like him.

they both blink. shen jiu thinks this must be some sort of practical joke. the boy looking at him doesn't seem to understand what shen jiu is looking at so intently: the kid has probably never seen his face before, if anything. but he knows that something is up because he starts fidgeting and starts acting a bit scared the longer shen jiu stares without saying anything before finally breaking and shoving the coin bag back into shen jiu's hands.

who takes it. but also doesn't stop staring.

liu qingge, at this point, has recovered enough face and pushed down enough shame to walk into the brothel to drag shen jiu out before he also comes face to face with this child and is suitably confused.

of course there is no silence from liu qingge. the first thing he asks is if the kid if shen jiu's son, to which he snaps no. then he's asked if its a bastard brother or something along those lines. and shen jiu wants to automatically reply no to that as well before very suddenly and startlingly realizing that for as much as he assumed his mother was dead, he never actually remembered her dying. or saw a grave. while very rapidly realizing that he kind of just constructed the idea of her being dead for the sake of coping with the fact that she got rid of him away willingly. which is. wow. okay. shen jiu can't tell if he's feeling white hot rage so overwhelming that its making him blank out or he's so painfully numb that every limb of his prickles like its falling asleep.

either way. he looks around at this brothel and at this child who has bruises on his wrists and arms and peeking out under his robes—robes which look far too much like the ones that the prostitutes around him are wearing and asks what happens to his mom. and learns that she died when he was born and the boy is fifteen years old. which is hilarious because anyone with a working set of eyes can tell he's barely hitting double digits, let alone passing himself off as a teenager.

and then shen jiu feels like laughing hysterically for a whole other reason, watching the kid flinch when a large lumbering man pushes past the three collected at the entrance to walk in. and many realizations are piling up in his head all at once and thinking about this is making him want to throw up. and he wants to walk away and forget this ever happened and pretend that if he flies all the way back to cang qiong mountain immediately then this child will fade to the back of his memory and nothing will matter except for becoming head disciple.

which is when he remembers the only thing that is roadblocking him.

and shen jiu looks down at this child who is shaking slightly but still managing to look him in the eyes. who is covered in bruises but still stole money off of him. who is living in a brothel but hasn't wilted and rotted away like a dying flower. who has an ember of potential in his stomach, the possibility of becoming a cultivator just nearly there.

what better way to prove that he can become a head disciple than teaching his brother (???) how to become a cultivator? someone he can make countless mistakes with who will be indebted to him because of shen jiu saving him from this place. someone he can show to the peak lord as proof that he can work with children, he can teach, he has that slight touch of softness needed for a peak lord who will hand down knowledge to generations after him.

it doesn't even necessarily need to be real softness. he can just practice with this child, who knows nothing better, who is tied to shen jiu and won't leave once he comes to cang qiong because (and shen jiu can't tell if this makes him want to throw up or straighten up, pleased with his cleverness) he knows what is waiting for him when if he ever decided to leave, and shen jiu has garnered enough of a reputation that no one will want to try to be near anyone wearing his face.

which is a very tangential way to say that shen jiu asks for the child's name ("all the women here call me yuan." it is very impersonal) before telling him that this is the only time he will ever get an offer like this and no one else will ever care to look at someone of his standing ever again so it is important to listen to everything he says carefully. he tells yuan that he will take him back to his sect to become a cultivator. but he can never come back here and speak of this or how they met once they leave. any connections to this place will be cut off. he will be under shen jiu's care but fend for himself once they get back. shen jiu leaves him with one of his fans and enough coin for a meal before telling him that they will return in a few days time, by which time yuan will have made his decision. the fan is promised as incentive to come back because shen jiu doesn't need to child's trust broken before they even get there. he does all this before leaving without another word.

liu qingge is spitting blood the whole way back to their inn on the other side of town, questioning what the hell got into shen jiu and what was he talking about and any number of other things before shen jiu starved him out by refusing to say a word.

when they come back a few days later, yuan takes barely a minute to grab a bag of everything he needs before he looks up, handing shen jiu's fan back to him.

let me know if you want a continuation of this or a fic hahaha i will add it to the list

[part two!]

[venshichan]

So we all know those au where Shen Yuan transmigrates early and becomes Shen Jiu’s mentor/guide, right? SY could be a parent, an older brother, a younger brother, a sibling, a fellow Qing Jing disciple–could be a shidi or shixiong–or a random rogue cultivator.

But what if... he transmigrates as Qiu Jianluo?

Enter, SY, who finds himself transmigrating into QJL, realizing he's Qiu Haitang's older brother and meant to be murdered in cold blood in a few years by the future Scum Villain’s hands. He tries his best to avoid taking Shen Jiu into his household to avoid dying, but the System threatens to send him back to his old body if he doesn't let the plot run its course. It's very hard to avoid your death when even the System brought back the original goods because you refused to play your role—so now you share a body with it's former host, where you can see what the other is doing whenever they are in control, but helpless and unable to do anything about it.

SY would be in control at night, but QJL would be in control by day–hence the reason why SJ was still brought into the Qiu Household, because QJL (the asshole) went out somewhere and brought him back while SY was "asleep".

To everyone else's pov, "QJL"–after some weird fever and a terrible accident–is bipolar. By day, he's the cruel young master. By night, he's the sweet and kind young master–the old version of QJL, the one who wasn't yet exposed to the cruelty of society, the version who hadn't been taken aside by his father to be molded to who he would be in the far future. Of course, people preferred the "nicer" side.

Shen Jiu doesn't know what’s happening, but he also prefers the kinder side: according to what he hears about his master, he had suffered a terrible accident–It was out of nowhere, too!–on his birthday where things changed.

SJ’s life will continue on as it was–except he gets spoiled by SY at night, gets cuddled by him, gets comforted and such. He gets to learn that the "nicer" side likes to call himself "Shen Yuan", and being to call him as such. SJ may or may not....have a crush on "SY". Well, it's complicated, really, since the "young master" is also the one who sort of hurts him and the fact that the share the same face/body–and also the fact that he's supposed to be engaged or marry the sister.

"SY" eventually manages to wrangle control from QJL, and seals him away after outsmarting the System, convinces SJ to escape at night to Cang Qiong Mountain Sect, giving him money and supplies so he can make it there to find his "Qi-ge".

He waits for SJ, hoping he would turn out fine and never treat the protagonist badly, always exchanging letters with him on how to handle his disciples and such, until a few months later, the letters stopped. SY is of course saddened by this, and mope around for a while: everyone isn't too worried that he'd go on a rampage and beat people up, because the night that SJ fled, the "harsh" QJL was suddenly gone.

QHT is a little worried about her brother, of course. And a little stumped that her fiance ran off to be a cultivator, but then again, it will work out for her to have a cultivator as her husband, right? Wrong!

SJ suddenly came to their household one day, all finery elegance, and grace–looking like the immortal master that he is, and QHT is overjoyed by his return. She thinks they'll finally get married and all...only for SJ to kneel before her brother and propose to him—

"....Xiao Jiu, what the hell?"

—much to everyone's shock, confusion, and outrage (on QHT's part).

P.S.: For funsies, this will mostly be in SJ's pov. :3

[venshichan]

Fic uploaded! Please check it out! Make sure to check my pinned post for my list of fics as well!

[milktrician]

doodle for my fic Hell Frozen Rain :)

[milktrician]

doodles for Shang Qinghua's Reincarnation Survival Guide while im free from classes for a bit

[dcxdpdabbles]

Bruce: And this is the WatchTower cafeteria. Fully staffed by family members of heroes or heroes who need a full-time job that doesn't interfere with their cape work.

Danny: Very nice.

Barry: Hi, Batman! Doing a tour?

Bruce: Hello, Flash. Yes, I am. Phantom this is one of my coworkers, Flash. Flash this is Phantom.

Barry: Nice to meet you. Are you a new hero?

Danny: Nice to meet you as well, and no. I've been established for a long time. I taught this one all he knows about vanishing into thin air.

Barry: Er, you taught Batman?

Bruce: That's right. He's my oldest mentor. We met when I was one.

Danny: Batman, is grumpy but he's a cute kid isn't he?

Barry: He...um yeah, he sure is.

Danny: He used to fall asleep holding the heads of his enemies. Curled right up while clutching them to his tiny chest. It was adorable. You know, I taught him how to rip them off the bodies myself!

Bruce embarrassed: Phantom, he doesn't need to hear about that.

Barry and every hero eavesdropping around them mentally: Of course, Batman slept with the heads of enemies. Just what I expect from Maybe-Demon

Barry outloud: Wow, you must be so proud. Um, if you don't mind me asking, how old are you?

Danny: I'm as old as Gotham. I'm dead

Barry: Of course you are.

Bruce: Well, we should get going. If you want to see the rest of the Tower before we burn your bones that is

Danny: Of course. Of course. Have a good day Flash!

Barry: Thank you. You as well.

Bruce, once they are safely behind soundproof walls that not even Supers can hear: Did you have to tell him about my teddy bears?

Danny: What? It was cute! Thomas had to order thousands of replacements because you were trying Grey Ghost moves on your teddy bears and ripping them up since you were two. Then you started sobbing whenever they tried to throw them out or fix them up.

Bruce defensively: Just because they looked different didn't mean they weren't my friends.

Danny: Aw B, you're still so adorable as you were when you were one.

[cryptidstatusbreached]

[dcxdpdabbles]

Alfred: Its 12 am. I'm calling it

Dick: *Gasp* No. You don't mean-!

Alfred: It must be done. *Picks up red phoneline* We're going nuclear

Dick: Don't do this!

Alfred: I must.

Jason: What's happening?

Tim: I...don't know

Damian: What? Drake doesn't know? We're all gonna die.

Alfred: Not to worry children. This will only harm me and your father.

Dick: Noooooooooo!

Two hours later at the watch tower:

Bruce "Lightweight" Wayne drinking with Clark and Diana for the first time: And then- and then he told me I need to be home by 12 am. Me! I'm an adult. I make adult decisions on my own and don't need no butler to put a curfew on me!

Clark: You sure do, Honey. Have about some water?

Diana: He's a rather adorable drunk isn't he?

Clark: He is. He hasn't stopped hugging me since his third shot.

Bruce muttering into Clark's pec: I love you, farm boy and your country muscles.

Clark: Love you too.

Diana: Aw. You make a good couple. How long has it been?

Clark: Thanks. Our first year anniversary is coming up. I want to-

Bruce spring up suddenly: Did you feel that?

Clark: feel what?

Bruce: The red phone has been activated.

Diana: What?

Bruce: We got- we have to-run. Not safe here! *stumbles* No! I'm uncoordinated. Love, help!

Clark: What's going on, Honey? What's wrong?

Bruce: He's coming!

Diana pulling out her sword: Who is?

Danny appearing in a bright green portal: Bruce Thomas Wayne! What's this I hear about you breaking curfew?

Bruce: Dad! I can explain!

Danny: Are you drunk? You know the legal drinking age is 221, young man!

Bruce sobbing: I'm sorry Dad, I just wanted my boyfriend to think I'm cool.

Danny: I don't want to hear it! You're grounded! You're going to spend the summer with me harvesting natural ectoplasm in the Infinite Realms without internet!

Bruce: No! Anything but that Dad!

Clark: Oh, you must be Alfred's ex-husband. The immortal that adopted Bruce and legally made him fall under a different dimension laws correct? It's lovely to me you sir, I'm Clark Kent.

Danny: Put that hand away. I know the reputation you Els have. You won't turn my sweet boy down the path of delinquency. You are never seeing him again.

Diana: Sir, Bruce is a full-grown man-

Danny: Not in the eyes of the ghosts council, he isn't. Look at him!

Bruce: *trying to sneak out a window* Why wont this open!?

Diana: Did he forget we're in space?

Danny: This is what underage drinking leads to! Once I get Bruce safely home, I'm going to go beat Alfred's ass. How dare he let our boy get this bad? And you!

Diana: Me?

Danny: You seem like you're far into your 200s. How dare you buy these boys alcohol? I'm calling your mother.

Diana sarcastically: I'm sure you are

Danny pulling out his phone: Hello Hippolyta? Your daughter is encouraging underage drinking

Hippolyta: She is doing What?!

Diana: No, wait! Don't tell my mom!

[cryptidstatusbreached]

[nerdpoe]

An attempt was made

[extrabonesforreallycheap]

[whaile]

late summer / early fall thoughts

[alyakthedorklord]

Justice League meeting on the watchtower, totally boring, nothing interesting on the docket-

Until a portal opens up and a white haired teen sticks his head through, and all the heroes are suddenly on alert as the kid looks around. His eyes catch on Batman and he grins, pointing directly at him.

“Man dressed as a bat!”

Batman: ???

White haired teen reaches back into the portal and brings another, slightly smaller teenager with black hair through, holding him up by the armpits. “Is this your dimension?”

The black haired teenager - is that Robin’s symbol on his chest? looks around, then tuts. “No. My Wonderwoman is taller, and my Aquaman has a beard. Also, this place seems more… color saturated.”

The white haired teen huffs. “Aw, man. I got excited. Well, at least we’re getting closer! Come on, Robin!”

Snapping out of his shock, Superman twitches forward. “Hey, wait-!”

Both teenagers vanish in a flash of light before any of them can stop them.

“…I would look good with a beard.”

[zealousember]

This would confuse and annoy Batman so much depending on where in the timeline this one Batman is in, like is he still on dick as robin, or Jason as robin, or even tim, like does the particular robin. Danny had with him matching any robin Batman had in the past or present.

[supertaliart]

I made a cover for the incredible fic, Someday We’ll Learn to Walk Upright, by my friend @pisceseelie !

“Spiritual weapons do not choose wielders based on talent, or merits. I’ve seen many a fine cultivator make a common sword magnificent, and just as many undeserving of what they wield. Just as your fate fixes you to your body, fate fixes a sword to one destined Heart.”

—

Shen Yuan was an outer disciple of middling talent, hailing from a small sect in a forgotten corner of the Jianghu, that had few resources and fewer living elders. The death of his shifu sends him to Cang Qiong Mountain Sect, hoping perhaps there is where he’ll finally find a spiritual sword of his own.

Xuan Su finds him first.

[supertaliart]

A post-it Shen Yuan from @chaoticmitochondria ‘s fic: Someday We’ll Learn to Walk Upright!

In which Xuan Su finds a new weilder…

[gayfeatherfan]

(For context SY transmigrates into SJ’s body while he’s a disciple. They are still disciples here)

Shang Qinghua is super touch starved and Shen Qingqiu couldn’t give any less of a FUCK how his friends touch him.

like, SQH accidentally touches SQQ and fully expects to be slaughtered. But SQQ doesn’t react, so then SQH slowly becomes more comfortable being affectionate with SQQ.

After a few months, they’re laying in each others laps and are practically draped over the other (I’m mainly taking about SQH, because he’s the one who never got love and affection). SQH accidentally grabs SQQ waist in PUBLIC!!!! And YQY kills him right then and there (because he KNOWS SJ would not be comfortable with that)

[beforetimes]

au with disciple shen yuan and shizun luo binghe is a classic but i need it with luo binghe going through the worst depressive episode known to man when shen yuan transmigrates. he sees this intimidating otherworldly figure he's read about and realizes that his shizun is just a complete mess who's been isolating himself and getting more and more irritable and miserable and depressed. he decides to make it his goal to try and coax him out of the bamboo house because no one ever really sees luo binghe anymore outside of when he travels for peak lord meetings.

in my head everything else is the same except for shen yuan and luo binghe switching roles entirely. shen yuan is a half-demon antagonist meant to be defeated by luo binghe after being pushed down the abyss and returning to get revenge but shen yuan just tells himself over and over that if he gets on luo binghe's good side surely everything will be okay? because the system won't let him leave cang qiong mountain and wander the world as a rogue cultivator and he knows that the immortal alliance conference if where everything is going to fall apart. so he's convinced himself that he just needs to game the plot by fixing shen qingqiu's reputation and his relationship and things will be fine. surely!!

and, like, it gets off to a rocky start. luo binghe throws him out of the bamboo house for about two weeks straight before finally snapping at him and asking what his deal is, to which shen yuan lets him know that the other disciples just haven't seen him in so long and they've all been worried and shen yuan just wants to make sure he's okay. and shen yuan knows he's playing the scum villain disciple but he isn't aware of the fact that this sounds so out of character coming from shen qingqiu that it snaps luo binghe out of this dissociative state he's been in for the past few months.

all of a sudden shen yuan's a sort of pet project for luo binghe. his shizun keeps inviting him into the bamboo house and probing him for seemingly benign answers to random questions, getting to know him, etc. and shen yuan thinks that wow his plan is working so well all the other disciples are saying this is the most they've seen him in the past few years. showing up to classes and everything! (of course, they're only shen yuan's classes)

eventually the investigation on luo binghe's part calms down and he hasn't figured out the truth of the matter but shen qingqiu is, all of a sudden, so much more interesting and alluring than he was when he first dragged himself up to qing jing peak a few years ago!

and what starts as a morbid obsession with a puzzle piece that seems out of place slowly moulds into like. genuine fondness on luo binghe's part. because even after the appropriate amount of time where shen yuan could go back to his regular routine and forget about needling luo binghe without seeming rude, he sticks with him anyway! always pulling him away from paperwork after hours to remind him to eat, offering to brush his hair, painting him fan's and landscapes under the guise of practice for class.

(of course, shen yuan's just! fanboying a tad! luo binghe was probably his favourite protagonist he's ever read about, only downside being the unfortunate novel he happened to be written into with the world's most unnecessary harem)

but yes. luo binghe goes through the five stages of grief before becoming inexplicably obsessed with his cute disciple and shen yuan is more than happy to dote on his favourite protagonist under the guise of getting on his good side.

there are still bumps in the road. luo binghe is stubborn and unwilling to look past the somewhat simple view of the world he's constructed in his head of demons being evil. he knows cultivators aren't all angels but the former is common sense, obviously. and he has a temper that flares in a way that makes shen yuan's body flinch in a well-practiced way. shen yuan has his bouts of intense anxiety and depression and brief near-psychosis at remembering the fact that he will have to lose all this if his crackpot half-plan doesn't work. and even if it does he'll still have to go down the abyss and he's just not ready for it, he doesn't think he'll ever be ready, not when his shizun won't be there with his kind eyes and steady form of comfort and command keeping him safe and anchored to the world. but the world keeps turning and so they both keep going until the day comes.

it's a shitshow. shen yuan's seal gets removed and luo binghe watches the demonic energy pour out of him, so numb it feels like he's been stuck in a winter snowstorm for an hour. shen yuan is pleading, desperate, forgetting half the words he tried scripting years in advance because he's at the edge of a cliff to hell and the one person he hoped would believe in him enough not to push him down there is staring at him like he's a stranger. and disciples are still screaming in the distance and the earth is quaking and the system is screaming at him while shen yuan's resolve crumbles and he starts to come to the conclusion that luo binghe will kill him here. he will. and luo binghe is just trying to breathe while he watches his kind and clever, mischievous disciple break down into tears in a way he has never seen before in his life. it sends icicles through his heart. and shen yuan is pleading but when luo binghe comes forward, sword in hand, he can't stop himself from grabbing the blade with his bare palms out of some sort of desperation. hoping and praying that just holding onto the metal means luo binghe won't try to cut his head off.

and it doesn't even matter in the end because luo binghe barely gets a word out before the ground crumbles beneath shen yuan's feet and luo binghe flinches forward, reaching out for him only to push him backwards into the gorge because of the sword that still solidly held by shen yuan, slicing through his skin.

and shen yuan falls. and luo binghe watches. and when liu qingge and yue qingyuan find him after the dust has settled, he looks too much like he did all those years ago, eyes blank and his prized disciple's spirit sword held in his hands, limp. alone again, after a taste of a life that could have been brighter.

masterpost

[cirrup]

Please have this fanart for one of my all time favorite svsss fics!

And if you haven’t already read Cultivate: Slow Life on a Monster-Infested Mountain by @neonghostcat then I cannot recommend it enough. It’s Liushen, Stardew au, and an absolute gift to read. I have reread it so many times, it is incredibly dear to me.