no thoughts head empty @bleuetsfrais - Tumblr Blog

i could ignore the pleas no longer. i've been too mean to him. he gets the blanket

(featuring grace's rarely seen maverick bloodhound. her name is lady and she is so, so old)

Ryland Grace in just his boxers, on the floor, white board marker in hand as he's labeling bones in his body and telling Rocky what they are and how fucked he'd be if they broke: ...yeah so this one is my femur and if that one breaks that's gonna take 4 - 6 months and I basically can't walk for most of it.

Rocky, texture reader in one hand, watching all this in horrified silence:

everyday-cutephoto

ailithnight

This is a worm? Or perhaps some sort of slug?

marlynnofmany

And it's gonna getcha

motherfuckingshakespeare

A HANDY CHART FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH THESE. NOTE THAT THESE ARE ALL THE INFORMAL AND YOU IS THE FORMAL SO LIKE YOU WOULD ALWAYS ADDRESS YOUR SUPERIOR/ OLDER PERSON/ SOCIAL BETTER WITH YOU BUT WITH YOUR BUDS YOU CAN USE THESE.

heroineimages

I’m not sure I knew the thy/thine distinction. Thanks for this!

ramalamacreatures

HANDMADE Polymer clay Opossum Family Sculpture

chipthekeeper

"I died, I don't have to do that anymore!"

littleguysdaily

This was a Patreon Request

sunderwight

Listen I'm not going to tell you not to invite the Hero over for dinner or anything, I mean you can probably get him to run a bunch of annoying errands for you if you frame it as a quest, and feeding him for his trouble is frankly the least you can do. I'm just saying, don't use any of the fine china. The guy will steal anything that's not nailed down, this is a fact. Also if you invite him into your house once you can reliably expect he's just gonna show up there whenever he feels like it later on. Sometimes he'll sleep in your bed. Yeah I mean being a Hero is tiring work so I'm not gonna hold it against him but it's for sure a Thing. Also do not invite anyone else whose good opinion you are concerned with, there are decent odds he'll show up in full plate, nearly naked, or possibly dressed in cabbage armor. No I don't know what the cabbage armor actually is. At this point I'm too afraid to ask. It might in fact be made of cabbages and I don't know how to process that.

sunderwight

The thing about the Hero is that he's great. If you got rats in your basement or goblins in your fields, he is your man. The gods made him many things and not a one of them are ordinary. I once saw him shove an entire whole dressed ham down his gullet in the middle of a fight. He will drink anything, and I mean including things you wouldn't ordinarily consider a liquid. One time I swear I saw him riding his horse across a bridge and the horse just, it just, I don't even know what happened one moment it was a normal horse and the next the Hero was standing on the bridge and that animal was flying sideways off into the sky and carrying on to the far horizon.

sunderwight

That's just his way I suppose.

sunderwight

He's a good man though. I won't hear a word against him. Every eccentricity he more than makes up for in keeping this village safe. Dawn 'till dusk he's out there. Sometimes I wonder if he even sleeps. I mean, I mean I'm not actually sure he does? At least not every night. Obviously he does sleep but I swear I've seen him run miles and miles without pause and carry on as if he's not even winded.

sunderwight

Unless he tries to sprint. He can only do that for thirty seconds, then he starts panting and staggering and it's really kind of concerning in fact.

sunderwight

He can carry more goods than even the best pack mule in town, though! As long as you don't mind him being his way about it. I'm not sure where he puts it all, but he can take any number of things, and it doesn't seem to even stagger him. Until he hits his limit. Then he just stands there, not moving at all, until he drops something right on the ground at his feet. But as soon as he decides what to drop, he'll be right off again!

sunderwight

The Hero is a generous soul. If you ask him for something, he'll probably bring it right to you. It might take him a while. It can be hard to say how long. Sometimes he gets on it right away, barely an hour will pass before he's back with even the most rare plants or monster parts or lost items. Sometimes weeks and even months go by before he'll turn up with the book you asked him to fetch from the library just two doors down. But I mean, he's a Hero, I'm just happy he makes time for us little folk at all.

sunderwight

He's usually pretty prompt with my own requests, which is good of him. I can't say that it's favoritism, I think that's just his nature and I've been lucky enough to catch him at the right times.

sunderwight

I don't know who told him I like mince pies, though. He always brings me one. It's very kind of him, and I don't have the heart to explain that I hate mince pies, in fact, so I just take them and pass them along to some of the less fortunate neighbors. Keeps everyone fed. I suppose in that light I do like mince pies, though!

sunderwight

Truth be told I'm just happy to talk to him every day, even when he's taking an odd turn. A few times he's woken me up in the dark of night, just minutes before midnight, looking like he must have fought a whole pack of orcs and carting around some bloodstained trophy, just to make sure he's said his hello to me for the day. It was frightening the first few times but you get used to it.

sunderwight

Don't ever try to help him fight, though. That's key. I know it might seem like the neighborly thing to do but the fights that man gets into are the business of gods and wizards, not humble village folk. I've seen what happens to people who get stuck in the crossfire and there's no sugarcoating it, if you're lucky it'll be a quick death. Just stay well back and let him do his work, and maybe keep a reward handy for when he's done. That's all he ever seems to want.

gotylocks

Happy 10th birthday to the best tweet of all time.

can-i-make-image-descriptions

[Image ID: Tweet from birdsRightsActivist (@/ ProBirdRights) on Jun 15, 2015 reading: I been working on my summer bod: it the same as my regular body, but this time more popsackles in it. /End ID]

notaplaceofhonour

will never not be mad about gig economy apps making a 4 star rating mean “unacceptable quality”

notaplaceofhonour

Doordash will suspend you below 4.2 stars.

Uber drivers can be suspended at 4.6 stars.

Lyft drivers risk suspension under 4.8 stars.

Even for apps where they don’t have a publicly stated minimum, their algorithms will bury you.

4 stars does not mean 4 stars. It means 1.4 stars.

If you give a person a 4 star rating, to these companies, you are not saying “I was mostly satisfied with the service, but there’s always room for improvement”—which is what 4 stars should mean—you are voting for them to be fired.

notaplaceofhonour

Genuinely, do not ever give people 4 star ratings on gig service apps for any reason that is not a safety issue where their continuation on the app could seriously hurt people.

If someone gives you “just OK” service where you don’t want to give them 5 stars, but you don’t actively hate their existence and hope they die, just don’t rate them.

pinkbowsandstripedsocks

edwardspoonhands

Honestly, Tvyek is pretty miraculous. It’s permeable to water vapor but not to water, it’s nearly impossible to tear, but can be easily cut. It’s cheap and made entirely without binding chemicals. In addition to being used for wristbands, it’s used to wrap construction sites to keep out water during construction, for tear-resistant envelopes at Fed-Ex, coveralls for mechanics, and my wallet, actually.

Fun tip, though it looks like paper, Tyvek is plastic, and cannot be recycled with paper.

fairypsychicarchive

andromedafalls

holy fuc

piisbetterthanpie

I didn’t even know it had a name

heathcliffe-honchcliffe

The evil wristband is Tyvek?!!!!!

Like of the Tyvek housewrap Tyveks?!!!!!

Never meet your heroes I guess.

delicatuscii-wasbella102

“A sleeping mother snow leopard curled up in a doughnut shape, front paws resting against her back, while her tiny, eyes-and-ears-closed kitten nuzzles into the fur of her belly and wraps their arm around her”