woof and whatnot

this blog is basically a collection of things to show my partner and my friends to make them laugh idk why the rest of you are here

[loveridden1999]

guys i'm not feeling well (←person who has never felt well a day in their life)

[effervescent-fool]

ive never been able to take "climb him like a tree" as a sexual innuendo seriously because i picture climbing a tree in my mind and then i picture a tall man in my mind and when i put those two things together im not seeing anything sexual. im seeing like. circus tricks.

[thementalistscandidate]

When I say it I mean I’m gonna do this to them

[peekychu]

They should invent a cry for help that has zero negative effects on anybody and also that makes everyone treat you like a little animal in a cardboard box. But everyone’s cool with it because you’re a cute little animal and not an adult human that needs to get their shit together to stay alive

[ttaibhse]

love this can’t believe it only has 1 like

[calkale]

@blog-by-a-dog

[theelectricdreamsofddx]

What a lovely little post you have here! *Drinks up its wordjuice to add it to my lexicon like some form of Vernacula*

[theelectricdreamsofddx]

*Sinks my teeth into your vocabillaries*

[titsay]

[marmoladon]

Fashionable headwear

[the-crawling-sludge]

@woodsywarbler

[dragon-in-a-fez]

come on down to the airport! we got

the worst coffee for $20

the tax-free smells gauntlet

people who have never read signs before

border cops, who are like regular cops except they only do the harassing immigrants part of the job

your country's least favourite franchise bar

[fleshdyk3]

genuinely in tears over this fucking video

[lamignonette]

[dogpuppy]

[medievalreligiousfanatic]

[ursus-arctos-horribilis-chadder]

Foul beast ate that adventurer whole, RIP

[dogpuppy]

[wordfather]

[valtsv]

[crawling submissively on all fours so you don't hurt me or if you do it won't be much of a surprise] i think a character has some neuroses that might not be very palatable or fun to be around

[whatcoloristhatcat]

[spider-shoes]

substance “abuse”? that can’t be right…… every substance I use was cherished