no thoughts head empty, just bpd

[satorusbabyk]

People really think I'm joking when I say my emotions get so intense that I believe the only way out is to kill myself.

[alonewildbird]

they should invent a me that can do things

[phoen1xr0se]

[bpdthouts]

month. easily. actually literally just did for all of Feb.

[what-iz-life]

I confuse people. i have a happy personality and a sad soul. i'm bold but shy. i love deeply but sometimes i feel heartless. i'm healing and hurting at the same time. i'm dedicated to growth, but i self sabotage

[theharbringerofchaos]

How it feels having bpd

[maybeshehasbpd]

Short on cash and the will to live

[nofuckingideawho]

angry. numb. angry. numb. angry. numb.

[bpdthouts]

me. sigh

[benjiiixd]

Stop telling me that you’re always there for me. We both know that you’re not. Stop lying.

[p3rf3ctcha0s]

My heart aches for the happiness I could've had.

[bpdthouts]

I just don't want to exist anymore. I'm just so very lonely. I am so fucking lonely.

[burned0utstar]

I'm trying to remember that I don't hate my friends, to remind myself that I am just hurt.

I am not wanting them to actually suffer, I just want them to know what it feels like to be ignored.

I am doing my best to acknowledge that I do not want to see them dead, that I just want them to stay and hug me.

I try to know that I am not a terrible person, while screaming at myself that I am.

[perfectllyill]

i hope this is my last year

[hisenemy]

How was your day?

[eth3real-man1ac-deactivated2025]

I want to be someone’s favourite PLEASE

Please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please

[trinketluvver]

me when i lowk realize there isnt a healing stage, there isnt a recovery, and that this is it and that this feeling will be with me forever, just lingering in my head and there is nothing i can do about it

[bpdthouts]

but actually

this year was the absolute worst of my entire life. family deaths, mental breakdown, declared bankruptcy, bpd diagnosis, lost all of my friends every single one, ER on thanksgiving (and was alone there), family disowned since I'm atheist and they're hardcore christian, had to move three times and all the money wasted with that, had to take a loan to cover the moving, no support system no "let's hang out!" no comfort no security no nothing. rock bottom.

and one of my brothers thought it was fucking hilarious to visit me unannounced, which shocked me because he doesn't contact me, only to leave a gift box. the box was for a watch. I didn't open it, what am I going to do with a watch? but since I was taken aback by this gesture, I texted thanking him. he said to open the box. I opened the box. it was a bag of literal, physical coal. he said that's what bad people deserve, as a joke, but boy he's not wrong. I absolutely deserve this. it was the only present I received, from anyone. I deserve nothing more. no one cares. not even me. happy holidays.

[bpdthouts]

*SpongeBob narrator voice* ahhhhh anuzzer Christmas completely utterly alone