There’s A Lot Of Cool Chicks Out There

Aspiring writer and filmmaker. Daniel Radcliffe once rejected me on Tinder so there’s a lot to unpack there.

[dankmemeuniversity]

[moonybyte]

Sanyo ICC-0081 "Mini Calculator": You can carry a calculator with you now, you never have to make big math in your head ever again!

Math teachers: We will multiply 14,762 times 2,853,654 among others in this test, no calculators allowed

Sanyo ICC-0081 "Mini Calculator":

[tracing-rivers]

Linguists throughout the ages: We have spent lifetimes gathering the significations of words and phrases in various language so everyone can appreciate them as well as possible.

Language teachers: Translate this text, no dictionaries allowed.

Linguists:

[drtanner-dickery]

Literally thousands of artists, engineers and scientists over the years: Look at all of these awesome tools we made to help artists make more art more quickly and more easily! Now art is much more accessible to everyone!

Art snobs: If you use anything more than a pencil and ink and these specific paints and brushes you’re cheating and not a real artist. Especially if you draw digitally. That’s double cheating. 

Artists, engineers and scientists:

[discocalico]

LITTLE WOMEN (2019) directed by Greta Gerwig

[zonerbonerz]

Just finished a session with some first time D&D players and this is the description sheet for a player’s human bard who casts spells by giving informational speeches

[zonerbonerz]

raw chaotic neutral

[the-bluespirit]

BONG JOON-HO accepting Best Foreign Language Film at the 77th Golden Globe Awards for PARASITE

[a-chilleus]

[pumpkinylink]

[ezzydean]

@notsuchasecret

[andrewlloydwebber]

the vincent van gogh episode of doctor who but instead the doctor takes ts eliot to the premiere of the cats movie

[depsidase]

[itberice]

[extraordinaryxmen]

the fact that keanu reeves rejected being on mcu multiple times but said yes to be on a sponge bob movie just shows how truly powerful he is

[cctinsleybaxter]

hey did bella and edward ever sit down and talk about what it felt like for him to die of spanish influenza or was that like a trigger for him and off limits

[rose-lily-hale]

edward: *sees flu shot poster at the hospital* *immediately breaks down sobbing*

[phil-dwyer-stan-account]

Edward Cullen actually fought every anti-vaxxer in the entire state of Washington we just didn’t get to read about it because it wasn’t relevant to Bella’s story

[teaboot]

Didn’t think it would take 14 years for me to finally wade into the Twilight fandom but it appears there’s gold in them there hills

[nyctosaurid]

the thing all sherlock holmes adaptations get wrong is making the guy an irredeemable asshole who treats everyone like shit . not only is it not reflective of the original stories they miss that “nice, smart, well mannered dude who snorts coke when he needs to think” is possibly the funniest character ever devised 

[aerialsquid]

I feel like the modern equivalent is that guy you think is super well put together until you find out exactly how much red bull he ingests on a regular basis.

[domicileensnared]

Modern Sherlock is that very nice English Professor-seeming guy who you bring a problem and while walking from the door of his office to his desk he starts explaining the entire solution you need

And upon reaching his desk he’s like “Excuse me one moment.” and pulls out one of those huge Monster canisters they legally aren’t allowed to make anymore, cracks the whole thing, chugs it, takes a deep breath, and then nods at you and is like “Alright, and then what you need to do is…”

[younggayanddoingokay]

Imagine how much better the dynamic of bbc sherlock could have been if they did this.

[kaylapocalypse-deactivated20201]

why even modernize it to energy drinks??? coke didn’t go anywhere. we still have coke. energy drinks aren’t NEARLY chaotic enough. 

Its is more like you hiring some guy to do private investigation about how your husband maybe cheating on you and Sherlock comes to your house high as fuck. Walks into your living room and without taking a moment to even talk to you or sign any paperwork, he turns around—pupils as big as god—and just says

“Its your best friend Brenda. I’ll email you the invoice.” 

and walks right out of your house. 

[bairnsidhe]

Because when it was written cocaine was legal and even considered healthy and useful by some laypeople, even though doctors knew it wasn’t, and Watson was always trying to stop people from encouraging Sherlock’s addiction because HE KNEW BETTER.

So consider this, Holmes, at 2am, desperately searching the flat for the stashes of NOS cans, only to keep coming up with passive aggressive pamphlets about the dangers of caffeine overdose.

Watson wakes up to a stench like Satan’s ass to find Sherlock sitting by his bed with a re-heated pot of cold brewed Deathwish Coffee that had been hidden in the back of the toilet tank (brewing) for five months.  Sherlock is trying to say he’s proud of John’s cleverness in finding most of the stashes, but he’s passed into the fifth dimension and all John gets is a creepy vibrating grin and a sound like a shaken cat.

TLDR, Sherlock did die when he fell off the Falls, but he was so coked up his body didn’t stop moving until like a decade later.

[shadowmaat]

Sherlock as one of those cryptid types the baristas talk about (there’s a post floating around somewhere) who comes in and orders a venti with as many shots as they are legally allowed to add, plus a few more for good measure (and a hefty tip) and then adds energy drink on top of it before chugging the whole thing, to the absolute horror of the cafe staff.

[junietwohundred]

This is the kind of Sherlock Holmes discourse I demand on my dash. Bring me more!

[sleightarcana]

Okay, but hear me out: Brian David Gilbert cast as THIS sort of Sherlock.

[a1-b2c3-deactivated20230114]

why are star wars planets more boring than earth and our solar system like sure we’ve seen desert, snow, diff types of forest, beach, lava, rain, but like… 

rainbow mountains (peru)

red soil (canada/PEI)

rings (saturn’s if they were on earth) 

bioluminescent waves

northern lights (canada)

salt flats (bolivia, where they filmed crait but did NOTHING COOL WITH IT except red dust?? like??? come ON)

and cool fauna like the touch me not or like, you know, the venus flytrap.. and don’t get me started on BUGS like… we have bugs cooler than sw aliens

BASICALLY like???? come on star wars you had one (1) job where are the cool alien species

[wearethesparkk]

I KNOW!! I did a report on filming locations in Star Wars last year and just made a list of places that looked so surreal they could make a convincing other planet. You covered some on my list but if I could just add a couple more:

Tsingy di Bemaraha, Madagascar

Zhangye Danxia, China (similar to the Rainbow Mountains in terms of appearance)

Chocolate Hills, Philippines

Giant’s Causeway, Northern Ireland

So many missed opportunities with cool ass things on Earth, Lucasfilms smh…

[memcjo]

Earth is effing amazing!

[isnerdy-deactivated20190101]

Quebrada de Humahuaca, Argentina

Lake Retba, Senegal

Tepui, Venezuela

Tianzi Mountains, China

[bunjywunjy]

these would make amazing Star Wars planets OR fantasy material:

Tsingy du Bemaraha, Madagascar again (but a different part)

(those are razor-sharp, if you were wondering. very little of this area has been explored because YIKES)

Lake Natron, Tanzania

(looks cool, but is alkaline enough to Kill Your Shit)

Lake Baikal, Russia

(the deepest lake in the world, seriously)

and I’ll wrap it up with Son Doong Cave, Vietnam, the largest cave in the entire world.

it puts anything Dagobah has to offer to absolute shame:

(seriously, the largest chamber is 660 feet high. you could jam a fucking skyscraper in there and still lose it) 

anyway I really like caves thanks for coming to my ted talk

[sirfrogsworth]

Wholesome acceptable rat kissing. 

[black-eye-friday]

[pollitoesbonito]

Anyways, I love Dave Malloy

[kajbsdfhgioigjhfdsahjsid]

me bathing my dog: ohhhhh does she like the water!!! is it waaarrrm!!! ooooo shes gonna be so cleeeaaaan shes a clean little goorrrl gonna smell so goooood!!!!!

my dog in the tub looking like a sad wet rat:

[lilacbreastedroller]

a chapterbook: *came with a stitched in ribbon bookmark, had a cloth spine, had those rough edged finished pages, or came with a map*

8 year old me: i am a 500 year old librarian and this is the most valuable book in my collection. i rescued it myself from a castle as it burned to the ground. *gingerly runs my little grubby hands down its spine and gazes wistfully out of the school bus window* i am the keeper of all civilization’s knowledge