This is a WIP of mine that I wanted to share. The pacing does go to shit towards the end but it will hopefully be fine after some editing.
Warningsā ļø: Supernatural figures(ghosts), mental health issues and psychological deterioration
Iāve lived in the same walls for the past 14 years of my life. Grey, dull and infuriating. My parents have always kept me sheltered, worried about what the world might do to their precious angel. How it would taint my white wings black and make me a child of Lucifer, shunned from heaven. There was a window in my room, small the size of a printer or faxing machine and it was barred. This window was the only access I had to the outside world
I have hallucinated in the same walls for the past 14 years of my life. I see things that arenāt there. That's why mother and father have me on pills, but they don't seem to work. The grey becomes black and from it emerges a ghost- Annabell. Sheās kind, she keeps me company when no one is around and she listens to everything I say. Mother and father never listen to me, they are always too busy with work and the housekeeper ignores my existence entirely during the day. When mother and father come home- oh! How careful and attentive she is- Their baby boy's guardian angel.
Annabell says she has ghost friends from the world of the dead and theyād like to meet me. I don't want to meet anyone new. It would be too much a hassle to make small talk and pretend to like someone whose presence I find quite grating and irritating. That being saidā¦ The housekeeper has a boyfriend. She brings him over when mother and father are away. Iāve never seen him, but I have heard him and I am certain that our housekeeper must be dating an ogre. His voice sounded like rotten cheese made from expired cheese plastered on mouldy, stale bread. It sounded as bad as my pills tasted, and that's a statement since my pills tasted like lemon mixed with sour milk. Honestly! Youād think living with mother and father would have shown her a proper example of a man, but alas, sometimes commoners are too shallow to acknowledge the depth of what the rich give them and they take it for granted.
I sometimes want to sneak out of my room but Annabell advises against it and tells me to stay. Apparently my housekeeper and her ogre were indulging in their crude amusements? Whatever that may mean. It was probably something commoners did with ogres that I, a wealthy young lad, would never have to resort to.
The sun didnāt shine as bright as usual today, not that it ever shone much within my grey walls. I sat in my chair reading a book from my mother's study that she had leant me. My leg bounced up and down in nervousness, the grey clouds in the sky felt to suffocate me and I felt in immediate danger. I knew why the sun didnāt shine bright, I wasn't the slightest worried about that. What was I worried about you ask? Darius. One of Annabellās ghost friends- he was the reason why the sun didnāt shine bright today.
From the moment Darius had appeared in my room alongside Annabell from the black in the wall I had so long come to admire for it was the only discrepancy from a constant grey, nothing had been right. The sun didnāt shine, the ogre didnāt arrive, mother and father left the window open, I wasnāt given my pills and worst of all Annabell had not spoken a single word to me the entire day. I felt neglected, like she was mother and father- she had left me alone to my grey walls and books whilst she enjoyed what the world had to offer, considering it offered very little.
Darius was tall, arrogant and charming. I donāt like charming. Charming is very manipulative- why else would anyone need to smile to the extent that their cheeks looked like theyād pop but except to lie and manipulate anothers perception of them. Charming was unsettling, untrustworthy that meant Darius was unsettling and untrustworthyā¦ I mean as far as I could tell of course. Annabell seemed to love Darius, she would go on and on about how amazing he was. According to her Darius won multiple horse riding trophies when he was alive and that she found a man in sports quite the suitor. I wanted to bash Dariusā head through a wall as much as I wanted freedom from the grey water stained prison I called my room. As much as I yearned to see the outside world, I yearned to see Dariusā covered in his own blood and flailing about in search for an escape, but alas the poor boy was dead, there was nothing I could do.
The days that came to pass with Dariusā presence within the house wereā¦ unusual. The maid had continued to bring her boyfriend over except now it seemed as though his voice had changed completely. Rather than rotten cheese his voice sounded as smooth as vanilla ice cream on a little girl's tongue on a hot Sunday afternoon and I still hadn't been given my pills. I suspect these changes have to do with Dariusā presence. No longer did Annabell advise me not to sneak out of my room- she was too busy obsessing over Darius.
It was Monday morning roughly around two o'clock judging from the sun's position in the sky. Darius had been over once again and Annabell wouldnāt spare me a glance. I had never spoken these words out loud but I loved Annabell. I yearned for her attention at every waking moment, that was why I had never wanted to meet her friends. I feared they would steal her attention away from me and fear right I did, for here I sat Darius on my bed, cuddling with my Annabell.
I got up and looked outside the barred window. From there I saw our garden. Annabell had mentioned in brief discussion that she had always loved begonias and it just so happened that mother had planted some many months ago and they were now in full bloom. They were pretty and delicate much like my Annabell. A tear fell from my eye. If I were to lose Annabell what would I be left with- nothing. A choked sob left my throat from the realisation I had made. I couldnāt afford to lose her. Not Darius and his charming smile nor to my own weakness as a feeble young boy. I had to do something.
I formulated a plan. I was going to go out into the garden, pick my motherās begonias, give them to Annabell and confess my love. If I did that then she was sure to be mine, right?
āNorman.ā a feather light touch rippled across my face. I looked to my right to see Annabell floating before me āYouāve been distant lately. Are you alright?ā She was talking to me. SHE WAS TALKING TO ME!! The smile that made its way to my face could not be contained. āIām just fine. Iāve beenā¦ thinking is all.ā she tilted her head slightly to the side with a soft smile on her lips. āThinking about what?ā She floated closer to me and I swearI could feel her ghostly breath fan my lips. My heart jumped in utter elation. SHE CARED ABOUT ME!!! SHE LOVED ME!! āN-not much, just the usual.ā she let out a cute humm seemingly satisfied with my response. She tilted her head slightly a bit more and looked down to my lips and as the silence rang through we leaned in closer and closer ā*cough**cough* Anna, we gotta go.ā There in the black hole was Darius and he had a dark look in his eyes, almost likeā¦ jealousy. Annabell leaned away from me and took in a deep breath before looking at the hole. āIāve gotta go.ā she sounded disappointed. Curse that dirty scoundrel for ruining our moment. Before I could manage out a goodbye Darius took Annabell into the hole. They were fast but I saw a glimpse of his eyes, they were filled with rage, jealousy andā¦ irrationality. Irrationality was never a good sign. Darius had made it very clear that he wanted Annabell such as I did and if he was becoming irrational then there was no telling what he would do. I had to act fast.
I had slept like a well determined and task orientated baby last night and today was the day I executed my plan. I had lied awake thinking about all the fond memories Iāve had with Annabell and how much fonder they would be once I finally confessed to her
I was reading a book, sitting in my rocking chair and Annabell lay on my bed like a starfish. She had tried to rope me in for cuddles earlier but unfortunately I was busy reading, so she had resolved to lie on my bed until I came for cuddles āNorman, what are you reading?ā she asked, voice sweet as sugar and plum and smile bright as sunshine āThe Yellow Wallpaper by Charlotte Gilman.ā she tilted her head to the side inquisitively. I sighed, putting the book face down on my dresser and getting in bed, pulling her close to me. She nuzzled her face into my neck and sighed contentedly, āIt's about a woman who's sick and has to stay in a room filled with ugly yellow wallpaper until she feels better.ā She removes her face from my neck and looks me in the eyes and speaks with a pout on her lips āI hate yellow wallpaper. Itās always obnoxiously bright.ā āYeah, yeah it is.ā she snuggled back into my neck and started humming a lullaby, a lullaby that she had said her mother sang for her when she was a child. Slowly but surely her sweet voice lulled me to sleep. That night I had the best slumber of my life with a ghost in my arms.
It was currently 12pm and I had been awake since 6am. Mother and fatherās car had not pulled out of the driveway which meant they were still here. I was unable to procure begonias for Annabell but that wasnāt an issue for mother had roses in the kitchen that would substitute greatly. My heart thumped and it felt heavy in my chest. All I had to do was confess. Like clockwork at 12:30 the black hole appeared and from it emerged Annabell and Darius. But something was different. They were holding hands. The anger I felt was hard to hide and I sense that Darius felt seeing as he gave me a sly smirk.
@cobaltperun @poems-and-word @oscarwildin
